GeorgeGlass

I want to die in slacks, like a man. Maybe loafers, too, if it's the weekend.

When you get right down to it, an awful lot of scifi and fantasy stories are basically about someone breaking the established rules of the story's universe. In a way, that’s what sets these genres apart from all the others: They have their own rules, and those rules can be broken. Being completely original is overrated. Just as impressive, IMO, is putting a new twist on an old trope, thereby messing with readers’ expectations in a way that they will appreciate and enjoy.

A few author’s notes about “Hot Yoga”: I deliberately wrote it to be different from my previous Phineas and Ferb fanfics in a couple of ways: It is light on plot and very heavy on porn. It features only B-list characters. (Stacy is the only arguable A-lister in the bunch, but I consider her an A-minus-lister at most because she doesn't appear in every episode of P&F.) Even though I wrote about a dozen Phineas and Ferb fics before this one, some of the characters in “Hot Yoga” don't appear in any of my previous stories (Dr. Hirano, Monty Monogram, Balthazar Horowitz, Melanie), and others make only brief appearances (Jenny, Coltrane). This is the first time I've ever written a full-on orgy. Although I've written stories involving threesomes, or multiple couples having sex at the same time, I had never before written about a group of people who all have sex with one another in various ways and combinations. Making this work required a huge amount of outlining -- not only to keep track of who was doing what with whom, but also to time events such that characters would be ready to switch partners at the right moment. Dr. Hirano has no first name in canon. I considered giving her one for the sake of this story, but given how many characters are involved, I didn't want to give readers one more thing to keep track of throughout the story. So the character is simply referred to as “Dr. Hirano” throughout. I kept the ratio of male to female characters low because, given that the incense seems to induce bisexuality along with horniness, I didn't want to have to do a lot of plot-gymnastics to avoid having any guy-on-guy action. Not that I never write that sort of thing, but for whatever reason, I'm generally only comfortable writing it for furry characters. Also, judging from the people who comment on my P&F stories, the readership seems to be entirely male and mostly straight, so I don't think many people were reading “Hot Yoga” in the hope of seeing some Monty-Coltrane action, anyway. That said, there was a time or two when I was writing this story when I wanted a female character to take on two or three guys at once, and I found myself muttering, “Damn it, there's not enough dicks to go around.” Overall, though, I'm pretty happy with the results. I hope y'all were, too.

No, I’ve never used Chekhov’s gun. Phasers won’t be invented for another 200 years. Seriously, I think it’s an important concept, because nobody likes it when (a) a gun appears out of nowhere in Act III or (b) the gun that was described in detail in Act I turns out to have no relevance to the story. That said, relevance takes many forms. Sticking with the gun example, that gun on the table doesn’t necessarily have to be used in Act III; it’s function may be, for example, to tell you something about the person who owns it, like the medieval weapons on the wall in Deathtrap. (IIRC, none of them actually get used, but they tell you something about their owner’s fascination with deadly things.)

Glad you enjoyed “Hot Yoga.” I’ve never watched Johnny Test. It’s not still on the air, is it?

For anyone who is following this story, I just posted the fourth and final chapter this morning.

When cookies go rogue, toss them. What do you mean, that’s not helpful?

First, my apologies for the lateness of this reply. I did write a response, but somehow either I never posted it or I deleted it by accident. In any case, onward! From Jomahawk2694 on May 20, 2017 Okay, I clearly need to watch more of that sort of thing. You know me so well. Given that this was my first Miraculous story, I wanted to stick to the show's formula as much as possible, because that's part of the challenge and the fun. Plus, having a structure to work with gives me direction in writing the plot. Good one! The formula for fights on that show seems to involve lots of leaping around and very little actual violence, so I went with that. You make a good point. I couldn't really think of what to do with Miss Match after she bound the two heroes together, so I just had her standing there watching. Your idea might be better. I'll do my best. Thanks for another motivational review! P.S. I think I’ve just figured out what the problem was with my original reply: The forum software won’t let me post a message that has a “thumbs up” icon in it. I probably didn’t notice the error message when I first tried to post and then logged out without confirming that the reply had posted.

I don’t generally like to age up characters. I feel like, if I wanted to write fanfic about of-age characters, then I would pick some who are already of age in canon. (Come to think of it, Milo’s mom is awfully hot...) That said, there could be some interesting time-travel stuff with the young characters’ future selves. More food for thought.

There are actually three chapters posted already. I estimate that the fourth and final chapter will be ready to post in about two weeks. Glad you’re enjoying it!

The trouble is, the characters are still going to act like themselves in those situations. If Zach or Melissa lose their clothes, they’re just going to hide behind the nearest curtain, trash can, or pistachio cart until somebody gives them something to wear—probably Milo, who will have a spare change of clothes, rain poncho, and/or radiation suit in his backpack. As for heroic rescue, are you talking about the “You saved me, how about some thank-you sex?” scenario? If so, same basic problem: I can’t really see these characters getting it on without some really far-out reason. Now there’s always the “strange foreign substance that makes you horny and/or uninhibited” device, which could easily come about if Milo’s bad luck causes the wrong two trucks full of chemicals to crash. But I feel like I’ve kind of been there and done that with “Whoops” and “Hot Yoga.” One thought occurs, though: The one other potential source of plot devices on MML besides Murphy’s Law itself is all the time travel that goes on. I will think on this.

An addendum to my reply to Nautiscaraider's comments: One of the chief reasons why I haven't taken a crack at writing a Milo Murphy's Law fic is that MML doesn't have a handy plot-driving (or smut-driving, if I'm honest) mechanism like Phineas and Ferb, Miraculous, or The Loud House have. I'm not sure how to make anything sexy come out of Milo's disaster-magnetism. Plus, the kids on MML actually act like kids; they show little of the precocity that characterizes a lot of the young characters on the other shows, which makes it more difficult to believably portray them doing anything sexual. I might have an idea for a short, non-lemony MML story, though.

I thought folks might enjoy seeing some author notes about “Whoops”: “Whoops” contains the longest continuous sex scene I've ever written. This was not my original plan; I had intended to gloss over some of the encounters and focus on others. But in the course of writing the story, I couldn't bring myself to shortchange any of the Loud sisters (except Lily, but most readers are probably okay with that). In the original draft of chapter 1, I had Lisa say that the menstrual cycles of women who live together tend to synchronize (something even my wife believed was true). But Fairy Slayer, who betaed “Whoops” for me, pointed out that that's a myth, so I rewrote Lisa's dialogue as appropriate. (This was not the first time that FS pointed out a scientific inaccuracy in one of my stories; he also noted a fallacious statement about black holes and Hawking radiation in “Dark Dreams, Forbidden Fantasies.”) The idea to make Lisa's comment “I can do a lot of things” a recurring line also came from Fairy Slayer. The “Amazinger T action figures” that Lincoln plans to leave to Clyde in chapter 2 are a reference to the Mazinger Z manga, anime, and toys from the 1970s. (I included this line because Lincoln seems to have a fondness for toy robots.) Boyz Will Be Boyz, whose members’ voices Lisa uses to lure the other girls away from Lincoln's door, is the band from Lori's first concert in the episode “For Bros About to Rock.” Lincoln uses a different position with each of his sisters: Lori, cowgirl; Leni, missionary; Luna, on their sides; Luan, sixty-nine; Lynn, various (as they wrestle for who will be on top); Lucy, sitting on Lincoln's lap; Lana, reverse cowgirl; Lola, sitting on the dresser; and Lisa, doggystyle. Lincoln's discovery that Lucy has blue eyes was a cheat on my part, because on The Loud House, none of the characters’ eyes have irises -- just pupils and whites. This style of drawing eyes was also used in Gravity Falls. Lisa's comment that “most lagomorphs do not have an estrous cycle” (in response to Lana shouting “Fuck my butthole! Fuck it like a jackrabbit in heat!”) came to me because of a Zootopia fanfic I had read in which Judy Hopps goes into heat. At the time, I thought, “Rabbits don't do that, do they?” so I looked it up, and indeed, they do not. Rather, female rabbits ovulate whenever they have intercourse, which is how they can crank out so many little rabbits. The lordosis reflex that Lisa mentions in chapter 6 is a behavior common among mammalian species, in which the female gets into a sway-backed body posture in preparation for intercourse. Humans don't actually have this reflex, but given both Lisa's substantial experience with lab animals and her desire to have sex “in the fashion commonly associated with Canis familiaris,” I figured she might enjoy including it as role-play. In chapter 6, when the girls start to freak out upon realizing that they didn't use any birth control when they had sex with Lincoln, Lisa replies that “There's no need for hysterics.” This is a bit of word play on Lisa's part, as the word hysterics comes from the Greek word hystera, meaning “uterus.” My initial reason for making Pythagoras a mouse (rather than a rat, which, to my mind, seems like a more appropriate subject for a study of intelligence) was that there was going to be this bit of dialogue at the end between Lincoln and Lisa: “So, how did your project with Pythagoras turn out?” “I'm afraid the experiment had to be terminated. The research ethics committee wouldn't approve it, on the grounds that hyper-intelligent laboratory mice always try to take over the world.” As amusing as this Pinky and the Brain reference might have been, the implied killing of Pythagoras seemed like too much of a downer for the ending of this light-hearted fic, so I didn't include it. Finally, if you liked this story, stay tuned: I've got a new fic in the works titled The Loud House After Dark.

I found ways to make it work for me. I softened the effect of the main character being a reptile by making her two clients anthro wolves (‘cause I like furries with actual fur). The prostitution thing I dealt with by making it fun for all concerned, instead of the prostitute being jaded and all about the money, or else being degraded by the act. The footjob I combined with the other male character getting a handjob. As for the double anal knotting, I didn’t like the idea of it being painful (and I didn’t think that was what the contest winner was looking for), but fortunately, the character has the ability to transform into a full-size dragon, so I had her do that before the double knotting. Figured she could easily take it then. And it made for a pleasant surprise for the contest winner, who hadn’t expected me to use the transformation ability in the story. (Which is called Leilaya’s Evening, in case anyone’s interested.) I think it was a serious challenge for all concerned. When it was over, I recall one of the other contestants saying, “Let us never speak of the vanilla again” (which is ironic, because her story, “Very Vanilla,” is hilarious). Some things are definitely better implied than shown. I don’t do that as often or as well as perhaps I should.

Almost all of the “risque content” I write is stuff that turns me on. If it didn’t, I probably wouldn’t be writing it. That said, there are exceptions: --Occasionally, I write about acts that don’t do anything for me but that seem necessary to the story or to portraying the characters the way I want to. For example, I don’t really enjoy writing about a man performing oral sex on a woman, but there are times when I feel the need to depict that because, say, the male character isn’t the type to receive oral sex without reciprocating. --I’ve held a couple of “story raffles” in which the winner gets to choose the subject of a story that I will write. One of these winners wanted a story about his anthropomorphic dragon character, who is a prostitute, and he wanted the story to include footjobs and double anal knotting. I’m not at all into reptiles, prostitution, footjobs, or double penetration of a single orifice, but I found a way to write the story that satisfied both me and the contest winner. You’d better smiley-face when you say that, pardner. How the heck did that story generate anger and concern? You mention in the disclaimer that it was for the “Very Vanilla” contest, so it’s not like readers weren’t forewarned. (BTW, I think you deserved extra points for making it about a married couple; I didn’t go that far with my own entry.)

Fair enough. A lot of fic writers out there say “Write for yourself!” but don’t always seem to take their own advice. It’s good to see that you do.

Thank you! And thanks for your review in the archive, too. Yes, the way that magic works in the Miraculous universe gives pervy fanfic writers like myself a lot of room to twist things up without violating the basic premises of the show. I would very much like to write a Milo Murphy’s Law fic. I’m just waiting for the right idea to come to me.

When you post the first chapter of a story, you are given the option to allow other people to post subsequent chapters. (This is used for things like round robins, where multiple people contribute short stories as separate chapters of one “story” with a common theme, like Halloween.) The default setting is No, so this author must have had some reason to change it to Yes (or did it by accident).

Thank you! Being faithful to the characters is always a top priority for me. I tried to make this story as much like an episode of the show as I could (partly by including all of the typical elements: an akumatized villain, the use of the heroes’ powers like Cataclysm and Lucky Charm, etc). I think that helped me make the dialogue sound genuine, because the characters were in a kind of situation that they often encounter on the show (albeit with an erotic twist). For example, it was easy to think of what Cat Noir might say to taunt the villain, because taunting villains is kind of his thing. I only write fanfic about shows with which I'm very familiar, because I’m kind of compulsive about getting the characters right. And because speaking in their voices is part of what makes writing fanfic so much fun. Thanks for the review!

I'm totally fine with leaving certain things a mystery, especially in a horror story, but this felt like it was getting into plot-hole territory. I mean, when one kid goes missing, well, he might have run away. A second kid vanishes, and some people may start to think that something's up, but maybe the boy was just copy-catting the first kid. But when a third kid disappears (only 2 weeks after the second one), just about everybody is going to be thinking that there's a serial killer on the loose who targets boys in their early teens. For months, it will be all anyone in town talks about, it will be all over the local news, and even if nothing can be proven in a court of law, people are going to be suspicious of the kid who happened to be friends with all three of the boys who disappeared. Parents will tell their kids to stay away from him, and Erik will be the subject of gossip, cruel pranks, and maybe even bullying for the next 5 years, until he finally leaves Westlands. And then there's Erik's parents’ reaction: Even if they don't suspect him of being involved in the disappearances, they might put him in therapy or get him some other form of help to deal with the loss of his friends. Put all that together, and that's huge number of memories to block out selectively. An easy fix would be to have Erik's parents move the family out of town, or send Erik away to school, after Travis’ disappearance. They'd have plenty of reason; clearly, Westlands isn't a safe place for a boy in his early teens. That way, Erik's memory-suppression would only have to cover a few weeks of his life, rather than years. I’m also wondering if there might be away to make the skeleton attack more ambiguous—that is, make it unclear whether it is really the bodies of the three boys attacking Erik, or just roots and vines, such that the reader couldn’t tell whether it’s the vengeful spirits of the boys, or the swamp itself, or Erik’s own mind playing its final trick on him. This is all meant as constructive criticism, BTW. I wouldn’t be giving it if I didn’t think “Ripples” was worth it.

Long ago, someone put together a sort of “magazine” of Simpsons erotica, to which I contributed a short story about Lisa getting some surprise buttsex from Santa’s Little Helper. (She ultimately decides that breaking taboos—like underage sex and bestiality—is a fascinating and liberating experience and decides to break more of them in the future.) The magazine was eventually posted as a PDF, but I no longer have a copy of it or of the story itself.

Maybe that explains why my latest Phineas and Ferb story (“Hot Yoga”) has garnered relatively few reviews. It’s been almost 2 years since the show went off the air; maybe the fanbase has moved on. Ironically, I feel like I can do more with the characters now that the show itself is over.