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Everything posted by GeorgeGlass
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My evolving list of chores:
1. Clean and polish front door
2. Buy caulk for cabinets
3. Laundry1. Swap out front-door wreath that's been there since Christmas
2. Clean and polish front door
3. Buy caulk for cabinets
4. Laundry1. Buy poison for wasps' nest on front door frame
2. Swap out front-door wreath that's been there since Christmas
3. Clean and polish front door
4. Buy caulk for cabinets
5. LaundryI’m never gonna get to that laundry.
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- Get invited to parlay with the wasp queen only to find yourself trapped as a breeding partner
- Somehow escape possibly involving a fellow prisoner spider, called Dave.
- Buy poison for wasps' nest on front door frame
- etc
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- BronxWench and GeorgeGlass
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Dave! He so wanted to be eaten by his wife. That poor guy. If a big bac is no good, take her Little Mac. Dude’s boxing career is over anyway.
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Ten ways you'll explain to your grandkids all those pictures of you in a face mask.
1. "This was right before I fought Goro in the semifinals."
2. "Unfortunately, our Kickstarter campaign for M*A*S*H: The Musical only collected a dollar eighty-nine."
3. “Yeah, your gramma really loved it when I’d put on this mask and- You know what, never mind.”
4. “They used to make all the ugly kids wear these. I hope puberty is kinder to you than it was to me.”
5. "...an' I did it all with nothin' but my horse, my pearl-handled six-shooter, an' that there mask."
6. “I could teach you, but be warned: The way of the shinobi is not an easy one.”
7. “On the up side, I got paid five hundred dollars for being on When Rhinoplasties Go Wrong.”
8. “This was long before you could just buy a kit to make meth.”
9. “Safe sex made one hell of a comeback in the 2020s.”
10. “I tell you, the very last thing you want when you’re fighting zombies is to smash one in the head and get splatter in your mouth.”
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Genius!
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- InvidiaRed, BronxWench and GeorgeGlass
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It must be my age, but M*A*S*H: The Musical gave me the best laugh. Now you have me wondering which modern actors would be cast for the main roles… and who would play the helicopters?
Still, all of them are fun. Now I’m almost tempted to start the process to have some grandkids of my own.
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- GeorgeGlass, JayDee and BronxWench
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I had to go to the post office yesterday. It was surprisingly busy, and it wasn’t easy to keep six feet away from everyone (although there were lines of tape on the floor for the folks standing in line). Ahead of me in line, a white man and a Latina woman got into an argument about one of them (I wasn’t sure who) cutting in front of them, and the guy told the woman to “go back to Mexico.” (Never mind that she spoke with an American accent.) Just overhearing that made me feel awful for the next hour.
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There was a similar incident in my local post office a few years ago, where an older woman lashed out at a young Latina woman. To my great joy, I was not the only one telling the older woman that her language and attitude were completely uncalled for, and that she was in the wrong to begin with.
But right now, I think we should all try to be a bit kinder. We need the kindness.
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- FairySlayer, JayDee and GeorgeGlass
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@JayDee I wish you got to write the action for when Bree from Narnia tracks this guy down and punishes him properly – whatever that means. (The guy is a horse’s ass, so it should fit.)
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- BronxWench, JayDee and GeorgeGlass
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Horses do have a nasty bite to them. And they kick like a...uh… horse.
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- BronxWench and FairySlayer
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