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So, as I’m sure many have noticed, I’ve been busy trying to work myself to death for the past five years or so. So, in that time, I’ve worked ridiculous hours with very little time off, and often multiple shifts in a day. As a result, I was more than a little unproductive here. I retired the end of March, and spent the first fourish months doing nothing but sleep. Have one final test from my doctor on November 22nd, so should be done with all that shit for a bit as well by then. In the meantime, I am now checking all the email addresses I always did before, as I now have the time. Am easing back into the archive repair, minor hunting, and other things I did as well. Sorry for the absence, but, glad to be back

No prostate cancer for me! So that’s pretty good news to get just before Christmas.

Just as a heads-up for all our members and guests, we’ve been getting a number of dubious posts lately on the forum. We’re removing the posts, of course, but we don’t always get to them instantly. PLEASE exercise caution, and don’t click on any links you see in these posts. Trust me, there’s nothing good waiting for you at the other end. Practice safe surfing, okay?

We’re also banning the spam IPs, as fast as we can

I’m juggling a lot of stuff in my life right now, from watching shows people want me to watch (Frieren most recently) to trying to overcome fears about my appearance to sign up for a dating site, but I hope there are still some people around here. I feel bad that I don’t post things as often as I did when I showed up here...six and half years ago now. I may not be one of the OGs, but I’ve been here a while, haven’t I? 😄 The good news is that I actually have a new story in the works! I’ve finished the first chapter, and will keep working on it. I don’t really want to start posting it until I’m done, but it’s a sci-fi/adventure fanfic and I had a lot of fun with that first chapter. In broader terms, I hope people here are doing as well as they can. I know I don’t show up as often as I’d like, but I think about you guys a lot! 🙂

The saddest little face in the world…

For October, I’ve been quietly rolling out small bug fixes, most are just performance based. Two user side ones -Site based e-mails are now fixed (turns out this was not a code based bug, fixed as of this post) - Bold text has returned to stories. DG is going to be doing some proofreading and squishing typo gremlins.

Story info editing has been fixed.

So, with having BP issues, and having to get an echo cardiogram late November, I’ve been monitoring my food intake and what I eat, when I eat. I’ve also started exercising regularly. So instead of losing weight, I gained twelve pounds in the last 2 weeks. What the hell??😡

And they’re rude enough to only get it on when you’re in the bed right above them. *shakes head* No class at all… As for me, depending on what you consider “wrong,” I may have never written a right pairing. 😅 My established pairings have an extreme age difference, to put it mildly (18-20 year old man and immortal women centuries to eons old), and I’m working on a brother/sister incest pairing. As for why, it’s a bit difficult to explain. When it comes to the extreme age differences between human/nonhuman characters, there are published authors who write stuff like that (see the popular A Court of Thorns and Roses series), but to get down to why it appeals to me, I think it’s a fantasy I have as a man who’s always been unsure of himself, especially with women, and there is a fantasy of a shy, nervous young man being introduced to sex by a knowledgeable older woman. Kevin/Luzurial doesn’t exactly fit that mold since they’re both inexperienced regardless of age, but the other examples do, including the incest story (older sister/younger brother). The “why” on the incest pairings is somewhat more complex; I’ll return to that when I have time.

The Monster Under The Bed x My Sleep Paralysis Demon (Those fucking squelching noises, I swear, it’s grim folks, grim).

What I said: “7 oz can of chipotles in adobo.” What the phone heard: “7 oz can of Chipotles in a dildo.” Even my grocery list is not safe.

Kids these days will never experience many of the rites of passage my generation valued more than gold. For instance: saving up your allowance for three weeks during the summer so you can buy one of those giant plastic Pixie Stix at the public pool’s canteen and downing the whole thing in one go to use it as a snorkel and spending the rest of the month with a burning feeling in the back of your throat that tastes like cherries, chlorine, and stale pee. …those lucky saps.

This day 6 years ago, I landed in New York, my first time in the US. Hard to believe it was that long ago. That trip was when I saw snow for the first time. That was very exciting. Although I soon realised what a pain in the arse it is.

The great thing about writing Star Trek fanfic is that there’s almost nothing canon about Vulcan and Orion genitalia, so you can pretty much make their bits work however you want.

Well that’s the curious point. Would a thruple qualify as a pairing? The same story I have Dawn/Buffy/Faith. A few other types of pairings too but they’re not out yet. In the Riverdale fandom, I have a pairing coming up involving Cheryl/Betty. Although they aren’t exclusive.

Oh, my. Can you still call it a pairing when there are 4+ people involved? Because if you can, than my Star Vs. the Forces of Evil pairing is Marco/Star/Jackie/Janna/Princess Arms/Kelly/Hekapoo/Brittney/Higgs/Starfan13. No, seriously, I wrote that one.

I don’t know that historically I’ve done much in the wrong pairing. However, I have a couple stories, one of which is posted here. My “wrong pairing” has been in the Buffy fandom I wrote a story that includes Dawn/Buffy/Faith/Joyce. Not necessarily a pairing but I have done gangbang stories obviously which could theoretically be a “wrong pairing”. There are a couple stories in which things got seriously dark but they aren’t really anywhere for people to read at the moment.

Never trust any book with a tagline or summary of this would make Lovecraft scared. Lovecraft is not a viable reference of fear. Man was afraid of Penguins, Air Conditioners and the Welsh.

I know it is a first world problem, my life is not in danger and no one is trying to kidnap me off the street, but dealing with FAFSA under this regime is beyond frustrating! Are we great yet?

Earlier tonight, I fed one of my non-fanfiction short stories through Pro Writing Aid’s “chapter critique” to see how it measures up against my fanfiction. I never thought I’d see the day when AI would smut-shame me. Yep. Seriously. “…some might find the level of detail in the sex scenes excessive.” What if I don’t wanna associate with that sort of person, huh? Fade to black is for wishy-washy people and FFN, not my filthy shapeshifter plowfest. Stay in your lane or bend over.

Happy Birthday!

Would really like a portkey out of here. Or a timeturner?

It doesn't sound like a problem to me. In my experience, people care about the consistency of characters, more than anything else. As long as you retain the consistency of your characters, there should be few, if any, objections about the path they follow and it's outcome. Of course, people would have a problem with a path or ending, that seems out of line with what is considered reasonable for the world in which your story takes place. But that really goes without saying, usually. So, if the ending is one that you believe your characters would naturally arrive at, then that ending should be fine.

Apotheosis One women decides to go all in on Christmas Eve. Ascension is an all or nothing game. Succeed and the godhood is thine… Fail and being utterly erased from existence Tags: Pending

Everyone is welcome to the winter festivies

Ay Yo! Beat me to it lol.

Quotation marks and parentheses will stay disabled in those for the time being due to site security. Colon and semicolon I'll try to enable this weekend. Also you can minic " with '' if need be.

@GeorgeGlass could you check if you can edit other fields? It will help narrow down wherr to look for the bug.

Yeah, I just had 3 different things happen at the same time and it was extremely frustrating. There are a couple weird things in the past few weeks. If I could post under my own profile, I would have posted that way. But for whatever reason I don’t have that here. But I’m not necessarily as upset about that. I just needed a place to say it where I wouldn’t get problems.

anyone have any advice on how to break a HORRIBLE, long standing writer’s block? 🙃

Just now, I saw something absolutely smoking hot on the internet. I mean, she was a seriously sexy beast—the kind of beauty I see in my dreams and drool over in centerfolds, regardless of whether I’m in public. If I encountered her on the street, I would absolutely embarrass myself, stare like a loon, and profess my undying adoration to her. A wolf-whistle, three muttered “damns,” and a couple of impressed tongue-clicks later, my husband gave in. Cold sighed, rolled his eyes, and grumbled, “just show me the car.” He knows me so well. 😆 It was, in fact, a classic muscle car—a ‘67 Oldsmobile Tornado. In my defense the lines on this bad girl are what wet dreams are made of, and I pity Cold for his lack of taste. It’s a sad way to live.

Hi guys Merlin here . I've always liked and wrote about wrong pairings. Most non con and blackmail . Hypnosis Older-younger Looser/hottie etc Not always wrong in real life but in tv shows etc when you know the characters you'd know it's not normal. Especially with tone and other love interests. Not sure if this is the right part to post about this. But in TV, movies, games etc what is your favourite wrong couples you'd love to see adult fics written about. For example I've done Hitchcock/Rosa b99 Astrid Hofferson/Mildew how to train your dragon Sarah Walker/Morgan grimes in chuck And more. So what's your ideal, wrong pairing ? And why?

I was part of a cooperative writing project there for a bit (I swear, my life is a wild sequence of “this is going to take a while to explain,” events), so I peeked back in from time to time. It’s been a few months, so I don’t remember precisely, but I believe what happened was that the lease on the site/server/what have you ran out, and the person funding it simply decided not to renew it.

When I was a kid, one of my favorite (age-appropriate and modern) books described a place as “a screen door town.” The explanation was that every time something happened, no matter how trivial or innocuous, every screen door up and down the street would open and slam shut twice in a ripple effect—once when the occupants came out to snoop, and again when, having discovered it was unimportant, they went back inside. Last year, Cold and I moved into “a lawnmower neighborhood”—meaning every day, there’s at least one person outside mowing somewhere on the block, and most days, their neighbors join in whether or not they need to mow, and the ripple travels further and further until everyone in earshot is mowing. Cold and I sleep during the day and we can only deal with the lawn very early or on his days off, so the constant mowing is a sore point. Well, earlier today, I heard the mowing start up again while I was trying to drudge through beta-reading a chapter from someone who might not have proofread first. As close as the mower sounded, I figured it must be that one neighbor who has an overpowered mower and an undersized lawn. I suffered through reading the same sentence half a dozen times, then stormed into the kitchen to get some tea and wait it out. When I heard Cold come through the door, I started ranting about “whatever asshole is mowing this time can kiss my ass” and a few things otherwise. Then I saw him and I froze. My husband was sweaty and covered in grass clippings. “Hello,” he said. “My name is Asshole. I mowed your lawn. Prepare to give me butt.”

The other day, I noticed a draft coming through gaps in a few of our windows (it’s an older house, but not old enough to have been built well) which led me to this long list of actions: Find appropriate sealant. Fix one window (it looks like a toddler finger painted with dad’s tools but whatever) and move onto the next. Prep window frame. Realize the windowsill was probably last cleaned in the 90s and is full of grease, lint, dust, and animal hair. (Hurk) Decide you don’t want to seal that junk into permanence with something that dries clear. Grab cleaner and scrub the gap clean with a bristle brush (cleaner sprays brown crap everywhere, barf) and knock loose some paint that may have been white back in the 80s. Realize the cleaner will need to be rinsed out and the paint touched up before sealing the gap. Give up. Sit on the couch and question your life choices while staring at the tube of sealant and convince yourself that cussing at inanimate objects is immature and you’re better than that. (I’m really not.) Realize that the entire time, you were standing in the window with the blinds open and the lights on at night wearing a man’s shirt and no bra with People-of-Walmart hair, and your next door neighbor is out on their porch watering their plants…at night. Homeownership would definitely keep my millennial ego in check if it ever got big enough to worry about.

This is more of an issue for me on the reader side of things. There was a story I was curious about which I kinda wanted to read but the formatting of the first couple chapters is off. I looked at some of the later chapters and they seem to fix it later but I’m a little put off by the first several chapters. Would it be considered bad of me to point this out to the author? I feel it’s probably better to do one on one but I’m not sure how to go about doing that. Rather than get a moderator or admin involved in it directly. I could write a review but that feels too public and somewhat mean.

If the author has a forum account as well as an archive account, you could PM them. Otherwise, unless they've put an email address or something in their profile, a review might be your only recourse. If it were me, I'd be glad for someone to point out a problem like that, even in a review. Remember, the author can always delete the review if they take offense -- or after they have fixed the problem you pointed out.

Hi, all. For truly “wrong” romantic/erotic parings, I tend to go towards dark humor. So, Dipper/Mabel isn’t quite a “wrong” pairing, though it raises the question that if they married in Kentucky and divorced in Arkansas, would they still be fraternal twins. I’m thinking more along the lines of Mr. Ed/receptive Wilbur, Granny/Mr. Drysdale, Uncle Joe/every female over the age of consent, etc. Cheers!

Jeez, where do I even start? As wrong pairings go, I loves me some incest. I’ve written stories about Hiro and his Aunt Cass from Big Hero 6, Dipper and Mabel from Gravity Falls, and Lincoln Loud and virtually all of his sisters from The Loud House.

May the fourth be with you all!

IMO, a nonlinear story can work IF you make it clear when the events of each chapter are happening. You could use a literal timestamp (eg, starting each chapter with the date) or a figurative one (“Iggy was exhausted from training, but the championship was only two weeks away”). Or a narrator could explain it (“Now that I’ve told you ____, let me tell you how it all began”).

As far as I know there is not a limit, at least not a low or mid range one. However, if you do have transition points as you mentioned, I expect those would make good chapter breaks.

Fanfiction *is* a spot to experiment with writing, so try it out, and see if it works!

As it is New Year’s Eve, I’ll get a review for one of the holiday party stories up tonight. Unfortunately, I’ll have to delay reviewing InvidiaRed’s story, because as it’s part of the Holiday Canon, I need to go back and look at last year’s Christmas story before I can read this one. It may not be required reading exactly, but it can be kind of hard to read these things out of order.

Since I doofishly posted the story in the archives before anyone had an actual story to put in it, I just added the URLs of the last few Winter Holidays to it.

I think I messed up; I now dimly recall that you’re not supposed to put the story in the archive until there’s at least 1 actual story to put in it. So @Deadman, if your piece will work at all as a standalone story, I say go for it.

44469 Woo, finally I got me some 69!

@GeorgeGlass what sort of punctuation? The filter code is pretty strict in order to stop malicious stuff.

I don't know... I think Deadman 'really fell off' as they say... I'm kidding of course; Just remember you aren't beholden to anyone when it comes to your own life. Hope you feel better later.