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No prostate cancer for me! So that’s pretty good news to get just before Christmas.

The Monster Under The Bed x My Sleep Paralysis Demon (Those fucking squelching noises, I swear, it’s grim folks, grim).

What I said: “7 oz can of chipotles in adobo.” What the phone heard: “7 oz can of Chipotles in a dildo.” Even my grocery list is not safe.

I’m juggling a lot of stuff in my life right now, from watching shows people want me to watch (Frieren most recently) to trying to overcome fears about my appearance to sign up for a dating site, but I hope there are still some people around here. I feel bad that I don’t post things as often as I did when I showed up here...six and half years ago now. I may not be one of the OGs, but I’ve been here a while, haven’t I? 😄 The good news is that I actually have a new story in the works! I’ve finished the first chapter, and will keep working on it. I don’t really want to start posting it until I’m done, but it’s a sci-fi/adventure fanfic and I had a lot of fun with that first chapter. In broader terms, I hope people here are doing as well as they can. I know I don’t show up as often as I’d like, but I think about you guys a lot! 🙂

The saddest little face in the world…

More broadly speaking, I’m definitely tired of the “AI slop” on YouTube. It particularly bugs me when the video is supposed to be about something factual, because you don’t know whether the AI is using actual facts or just making stuff up.

Ok, I actually made some progress on The Lake House today before having to leave for work. Let’s see how far I get in a week.

A nice quiet birthday was today

The great thing about writing Star Trek fanfic is that there’s almost nothing canon about Vulcan and Orion genitalia, so you can pretty much make their bits work however you want.

And they’re rude enough to only get it on when you’re in the bed right above them. *shakes head* No class at all… As for me, depending on what you consider “wrong,” I may have never written a right pairing. 😅 My established pairings have an extreme age difference, to put it mildly (18-20 year old man and immortal women centuries to eons old), and I’m working on a brother/sister incest pairing. As for why, it’s a bit difficult to explain. When it comes to the extreme age differences between human/nonhuman characters, there are published authors who write stuff like that (see the popular A Court of Thorns and Roses series), but to get down to why it appeals to me, I think it’s a fantasy I have as a man who’s always been unsure of himself, especially with women, and there is a fantasy of a shy, nervous young man being introduced to sex by a knowledgeable older woman. Kevin/Luzurial doesn’t exactly fit that mold since they’re both inexperienced regardless of age, but the other examples do, including the incest story (older sister/younger brother). The “why” on the incest pairings is somewhat more complex; I’ll return to that when I have time.

Never trust any book with a tagline or summary of this would make Lovecraft scared. Lovecraft is not a viable reference of fear. Man was afraid of Penguins, Air Conditioners and the Welsh.

Kids these days will never experience many of the rites of passage my generation valued more than gold. For instance: saving up your allowance for three weeks during the summer so you can buy one of those giant plastic Pixie Stix at the public pool’s canteen and downing the whole thing in one go to use it as a snorkel and spending the rest of the month with a burning feeling in the back of your throat that tastes like cherries, chlorine, and stale pee. …those lucky saps.

This day 6 years ago, I landed in New York, my first time in the US. Hard to believe it was that long ago. That trip was when I saw snow for the first time. That was very exciting. Although I soon realised what a pain in the arse it is.

Alright, that took longer than I’d expected. Invidia also has my apologies if there are a million notifications for a review, because I kept trying to fix a problem with the review of BW’s story, which meant deleting the review and resubmitting it. I put emphasis on “trying” because ultimately, the site seemed insistent upon crunching the entire review into a single block of text, removing all the spaces between paragraphs. I am sorry for how much of a pain that is to read, as it was not my intention. 😅

Well, as you all know, I was able to make progress on The Lake House, but not to finish it by a week after Halloween. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing, though, because I was struggling with how to integrate the theme of the piece into the ending, and it wasn’t until after the deadline had passed that I realized how I might be able to use it. So the extra time will (hopefully) lead to a better end product when it’s finally completed. I’ll keep working on The Lake House, and will either post it when it’s finished or throw it into the ring next Halloween season (fingers crossed that things are still stable for me next Halloween). In the meantime, I’m working on Meaningful Gifts again and have left reviews for both Invidia’s and George’s chapters of the Halloween story. I’ll read BW’s chapter on break at work tomorrow!

Agreed. Where you REALLY see AI is in some of those visual books on Youtube. Hubs likes to listen to them. Mind you, I’ve read countless sci-fi books, so when he’s listening, I can usually tell him which book and/or author they’re stealing from 🤣

Well, due to work, I haven’t gotten any work done, and we’re down to five days counting today. But if what Invidia and George said is true, and you all are ok with this even if it’s a week late or something, let’s see what I can get done quickly! *opens word processor*

I’m probably way too busy and appalled at recent world events to be this bored. Or at least, I ought to be. Someone accused me of not being able to write properly. Someone in an official capacity. I should be too rageful to be this bored. Meh.

The people who leave negative reviews on e-books reporting sex scenes are my heroes. It’s easy enough to filter in smut when you’re reading fanfiction, but the e-book writers get coy about it in their descriptions. If not for sex-averse reviewers, we’d risk reading a “spicy book” that never passes first base, get clam-shelled over the lack of smut, and have to go start a fight with our husbands or something. ...not that I’m speaking from experience, or anything. But yeah. Someone left a squicked one-star review on a book I was considering. Granted, the review was just the word “sex” written three times – like they’re starring in a demonic possession porno or something - and shoop, there the book went. Right into my cart. I hope it’s filthy. People like that are heroes.

Well that’s the curious point. Would a thruple qualify as a pairing? The same story I have Dawn/Buffy/Faith. A few other types of pairings too but they’re not out yet. In the Riverdale fandom, I have a pairing coming up involving Cheryl/Betty. Although they aren’t exclusive.

Oh, my. Can you still call it a pairing when there are 4+ people involved? Because if you can, than my Star Vs. the Forces of Evil pairing is Marco/Star/Jackie/Janna/Princess Arms/Kelly/Hekapoo/Brittney/Higgs/Starfan13. No, seriously, I wrote that one.

I don’t know that historically I’ve done much in the wrong pairing. However, I have a couple stories, one of which is posted here. My “wrong pairing” has been in the Buffy fandom I wrote a story that includes Dawn/Buffy/Faith/Joyce. Not necessarily a pairing but I have done gangbang stories obviously which could theoretically be a “wrong pairing”. There are a couple stories in which things got seriously dark but they aren’t really anywhere for people to read at the moment.

I know it is a first world problem, my life is not in danger and no one is trying to kidnap me off the street, but dealing with FAFSA under this regime is beyond frustrating! Are we great yet?

My take is that brilliant non-linear stories you here talk about get their fame from being good despite not being linear. A possible comparison is the Westworld tv-show season 1 that had a big reveal when you realized what you had been watching. In season 2 they wanted to repeat the trick and made things just as non-linear and in the end it was barely watchable. I have avoided the later seasons like plague. My point is that for every successful non-linear storytelling there are many more trainwreck attempts. Doing non-linear storytelling that manage to capture the reader is seriously difficult.

Earlier tonight, I fed one of my non-fanfiction short stories through Pro Writing Aid’s “chapter critique” to see how it measures up against my fanfiction. I never thought I’d see the day when AI would smut-shame me. Yep. Seriously. “…some might find the level of detail in the sex scenes excessive.” What if I don’t wanna associate with that sort of person, huh? Fade to black is for wishy-washy people and FFN, not my filthy shapeshifter plowfest. Stay in your lane or bend over.

Happy Birthday!

Simple, have a quick conversation chapter one of the sequel. “Where’s Joe?” “Six years in prison, because when they say NO PARKING, the really mean NO PARKING.” or “Got transferred to far, far, away.” or “He learned why there’s safety bars on woodchippers. Coroner estimated they recovered 60% of the remains.” And if you want the villain to be a surprise, have his whereabouts accounted/dismissed for in this conversation too.

Would really like a portkey out of here. Or a timeturner?

It doesn't sound like a problem to me. In my experience, people care about the consistency of characters, more than anything else. As long as you retain the consistency of your characters, there should be few, if any, objections about the path they follow and it's outcome. Of course, people would have a problem with a path or ending, that seems out of line with what is considered reasonable for the world in which your story takes place. But that really goes without saying, usually. So, if the ending is one that you believe your characters would naturally arrive at, then that ending should be fine.

Apotheosis One women decides to go all in on Christmas Eve. Ascension is an all or nothing game. Succeed and the godhood is thine… Fail and being utterly erased from existence Tags: Pending

Everyone is welcome to the winter festivies

Ay Yo! Beat me to it lol.

I think someone might have cracked out a phial of starlight, or perhaps a million of you all did. Start spreading the news… 🎵and so on and so forth... [message ends]

It’s also devaluing to be accused of using AI for writing simply because you like dashes, ellipses, or using proper grammar.

As much as I would love to see people use something that would correct formatting and spelling, the onus for that is on the author and not the site. My inner editor may be reduced to tears frequently, but site policy is to let the attempted murder of written English stand around with its flies undone and its complete inability to comprehend homonyms on full display.

Posted! “You Were Warned” (poem)

Man, there used to be so many more forums for everything, now I don’t even know where I’d find one in 2025. Nope, not a clue. JayDee, annoyed by those trees blocking the view to the wood* *I’m meaning a gentle arboreal idyll, not some throbbing meatstick**. **a euphemism for the penis*** ***There’s nothing especially wrong with slightly odd footnotes, but when you get into feetnotes you risk summoning Quentin Tarantino

I was part of a cooperative writing project there for a bit (I swear, my life is a wild sequence of “this is going to take a while to explain,” events), so I peeked back in from time to time. It’s been a few months, so I don’t remember precisely, but I believe what happened was that the lease on the site/server/what have you ran out, and the person funding it simply decided not to renew it.

I think the most messed up one I found was Umbridge X Neville.

We permit content with fictional characters who are 15, and as @Desiderius Price notes, the appropriate tag is Minor2 for characters aged 14 to 18, and Minor1 for characters under 14. The only area where characters under the age of 18 are not permitted is Celebrity Fiction/Real Person fiction. Legally, we can’t allow that sort of story. However, original work with fictional characters under the age of 18 is allowed, as long as the story is properly tagged.

Awhile back, someone on a random Reddit post suggested I might be neurodivergent. I’d only heard the term used for people with autism – yes, I live under a rock – so my initial response was disgruntlement. My husband, after all, is autistic, and I had a mental image of the time he met my prudish religious neighbor for the first time and made a joke about his dick; if we were both that awkward outwardly instead of just on the inside, we’d be a right mess. There was also a sidenote of, “shit, I’m even more fucked up than Cold, how dare this person compare him to me? He doesn’t deserve that insult!” indignance. Come to find out “neurodivergent” applies to several diagnoses and disabilities; it applies to most (any?) condition resulting from deviations in how the brain is wired...including mine. Apparently, I am neurodivergent. So is Cold. So many things make sense now. That Redditor was right and I had no idea. That said...I’ve been editing a chapter of my novel with Boney M.’s “Rasputin” playing on repeat for...uh...an hour? ...or three? Because it’s stuck in my head? Okay, so maybe there were signs. Maybe.

Hello, sorry, it’s still me, I have a problem: I posted my fic but although i select S through Z ‘YOU’ it appears in ‘1 through F’ why??? I already tried to fix it twice.. should I delete it? I don’t want it to appear in the wrong section, sorry! edit: it seems the problem is fixed now, sorry for annoying you!

A very big birthday shout-out to WillowDarkling! Happy Birthday, Neko-baby!

Hi, all. For truly “wrong” romantic/erotic parings, I tend to go towards dark humor. So, Dipper/Mabel isn’t quite a “wrong” pairing, though it raises the question that if they married in Kentucky and divorced in Arkansas, would they still be fraternal twins. I’m thinking more along the lines of Mr. Ed/receptive Wilbur, Granny/Mr. Drysdale, Uncle Joe/every female over the age of consent, etc. Cheers!

Jeez, where do I even start? As wrong pairings go, I loves me some incest. I’ve written stories about Hiro and his Aunt Cass from Big Hero 6, Dipper and Mabel from Gravity Falls, and Lincoln Loud and virtually all of his sisters from The Loud House.

The technical limit would be a @manta2g or @DemonGoddess type of question, and it’d be in bytes, not words. I know we’ve had some of the annual halloween/holiday round-robin submissions where it’s 50k max for the rules, but that’s more of a reader tolerance limit IMO. In comparison, AO3 limits it to 500k characters, and FFN limits your documents to 5MB (and will stop adding to the word count at 65k words).

If you’re a time-traveling story… SURE! Outside of that, you’ll probably confuse the readers if it’s extensive. (Aside from short flashbacks, or a brief start near the climax along with “two years earlier...”) This confusion is the main reason I broke up my first story I posted here, I was trying to cram in backstory into chapters as well, and came to realize I basically had multiple stories instead. (Which, while I’ve yet to really write that first story, I’ve been busy on the others.)

There are many unmentioned benefits to marrying your best friend…benefits such as them bringing you a cat to cuddle because said cat got too comfy in their lap and ripped a loud, wet, nasty fart. Yep, it was Heiferlump. Also yes, Cold did run away cackling afterward. Boys.

Well, y’all, we finally did it. We’re moving to a new house in my hometown! And nobody died in it so I should be the only Ghost there! Going on hiatus sucks, for sure, but I’m still so happy I could squeal. Heifer and Woozle are predictably unenthused, but cats don’t get a vote. This area has gotten too damned expensive and dangerous for us, and I’m tired of being homesick. Fortunately, the Woozle-bug already has a great vet in the city to help with his health problems (the scariest of which is showing some improvement, yay!) and Heiferlump? She’s going to have an entire neighborhood to give her attention when she inevitably convinces them she’s stuffed then moves. (Yep. It’s gonna happen. She’s got a history. We expect heart attacks on the regular.) Now if we can just finish everything early in the year so I can get back to writing!

We’re also banning the spam IPs, as fast as we can