quamp

.. scream "Please don't hurt me!! I need help here!!" People will usually react to this by __________________________.

Truth is weirder than fiction. G/NG: Been accused of hogging the computer to spend too much time on AFF.net by your S.O.

Well, I haven't yet, but next month, I plan to be in Washington D.C. My flight lands at Dulles but I'm actually going to Baltimore. (O.k., I was desperate last time!) I have never... bought something that had the words "As seen on TV" on the package.

*sings out of tune* La la la la... Sorry, maybe once I've had singing lessons. Dazzled?

^ I'd like to make a bunch of people dig for clams - I'll bet Ann Coulter has never done any back-breaking work in her life, for example. < Prefers clams lightly fried, not in stew or chowder. V Likes seafood as well.

PHEW! What's that smell in here? >Cough!< >Hack!< >Wheeze!<

I have that problem all the time. Just look at my work. :\ The size of a fandom isn't as important as the quality of the work, IMO. I've heard of Chibi Vampire and E's otherwise. I haven't heard of TACTICS though. I thought Chibi Vampire was just stupid though. A lot of the fandoms I write in - Galaxy Angel, Girls Bravo, Ninja Nonsense: The Legend of Shinobu - has anyone heard of these?

^ would certainly be a boon to the porn/prostitution industry. < Thinks ^ sounds like a premise for an original fic. V Will write this fic & post it.

Because we have to deal with women who are constantly PMSing... why?

What happened when you told that boy to stop chewing gum and he stuck it in your hair? Something here doesn't quite add up.

Nothing that ended up here, I hope. Unfortunately, as a former tuba player, I never really had the melody. Madapple?

Well, I've French kissed a woman... it was wonderful. (Then again, I am male. I've never kissed another man though.) I have never... spent the evening with my family watching porn.

Probably your collection of yaoi. Can I join in even though I don't drink?

Shame on you for pirating stuff, Redsilver. Back in ye ancient times when I was a lad, you didn't have a choice. Music came in records or 8-track cassette tapes. I have never... pirated music.

Because head injuries cause animals to perform below normal. Why?

Should have stuck with the same old. Fate?

^ Will never find the cameras hidden in his/her bathroom. < Didn't put them there. V Wants footage from those cameras.

Not guilty. I've come close numerous times, though. G/NG: Lied you your S.O. about his/her performance in bed.

Why is Ann Coulter's S.O. looking so blue? Oh shit.

Because Apple got their workers to go online and say how ipods are "teh bawmb!" and then people who didn't know better bought them. So is there an MP3 player that isn't complete crap out there?

Pilfer (Erm... don't you mean buns of steel?)

How do I fix that squeaky hinge? That's very welcome news to me.

Well, when a person travels faster than mach 5, the g-forces crush them like a grape. Until that problem is solved, time travel is just a fantasy. What happened to personal jetpacks?

^ Possibly, but then again, they also have menstruation, and that's not something I'd like to undergo. < Knows that orgasms are different for men and women, but the level of pleasure is the same. V Wonders how < knows this.

Due to the fact that someone broke the pixie molds... Why?