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  1. Shaduan

    Favourite Pairings

    Okay, favored pairings: Shikamaru/Temari: It's practically canon, and you know he wouldn't like her if she wasn't a challenge... Shino/Hinata: They're both quiet, subtle characters. She needs a strong shoulder to lean on and he needs someone gentle who isn't afraid of him. Sakura/Gaara: This pairing has kind of grown on me lately... Kiba/Ino: Either they'll hook up or they'll kill each other. Kakashi/any female: Well, yeah. He's teh hawt. He and Tsunade make an interesting D/s pairing.
  2. Last night I dreamt the core cast of "Half-Life 2" had started a Dragonforce cover band. Barney was lead vocals, Gordon was lead guitar and backup vocals, Dr. Kleiner was the bassist, Alyx on the keyboard, and d0g on drums. It was the awesomest dream I've had in some time - apparently Gordon can really tear it up on the electric guitar
  3. Because evil is sexy. Do wands in the Potterverse come with a 'vibrate' setting, or do they have to pay extra?
  4. Rocks. Lots and lots of rocks. Falling out of the sky. How exactly is mpreg supposed to work, anyway?
  5. Okay, here's a question that might or might not be shared by experienced smut writers: How do I keep all my sex scenes from sounding the same? I have a number of ideas for adult fics, two of them PWP vignettes and one of them taking the time to lead up to the main event (so to speak), so how can I add a little variety so that pairing A doesn't get together and do it exactly the same way as Pairing B or C?
  6. A bunny, for your edification: A "One Piece" fic where Sanji is in a full-body cast or otherwise can't move for some reason and it's driving him nuts because Nami is taking care of him. (Not familiar enough with the fandom not to make cardboard cutouts of all the characters).
  7. Describe what's going on, beyond "they had hot sweaty sex and collapsed in exhaustion afterwards". If he touches her, are his hands smooth, rough, calloused? How does she feel to him? Where does he touch her? What does he smell like? How about her? What does it taste like when they kiss? What sounds are they making? Sighs, moans, grunts? Describe the foreplay, if there is any - done right, it get's the reader turned on too.
  8. I agree that human genitals should not be given food metaphors except for visual reference (However sausage? ...nnno). Flowerly language is fine, in moderation (because using 'penis' or 'vagina' all the time gets a bit tired). When I wrote "Talk Nerdy To Me", I used "golden honey lotus" because a) the male lead got most of his knowledge about sex from an Agatean (Chinese) manual, so B) it sounded right, and c), it wasn't a serious fic anyway.
  9. Stuck with You in my pants...
  10. The celebration hearkens back to an ancient ritual that once took place on January 1st, during the course of which the biggest idiot in the town would be drug out into a field and beaten to death. Why does my butt itch?
  11. Gordon Freeman. He just fits into that Hazard Suit so well... ... and he's smart. Totally smart. All about the brains.
  12. I'm no longer allowed to sing whatever song is running through my head at the top of my lungs at work. (today was "Time Warp", then "Footloose", then "Skullcrusher Mountain")
  13. Shaduan

    Answers First

    Why are you coming at me wielding a cucumber with a condom over it? Because the chickenmonkey told me to.
  14. I'm no longer allowed to sing "Men in Tights" at work until physically restrained.