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The word “octopussior” comes to mind.

Mind flayers, also known as illithids, are apparently hermaphroditic creatures and don’t reproduce in the normal sense. They lay eggs from which tadpole-like creatures emerge which are used to make more of their kind through a process called ‘ceremorphosis;. Basically, they capture someone and render them docile through a psionic blast. A newly hatched tadpole is inserted into the victim’s head, usually through the nostril or ear-canal. The tadpole grows and devours the brain of the host, attaching attaching itself to the brain stem and essentially becoming the new brain of the host. Over the course of a week, the host’s body changes form and morphs into a new mind flayer. The new mind flayer does retain a few dim memories associated with its former host, but they’re only vague and seldom have any affect on the new mind flayer. While I can’t find it specifically mentioned out anywhere, I do assume they have genitalia of some kind, but my feeling is that they – and the sex act itself – would be fairly rudimentary, but that’s not specified that I can tell so you could easily change that to suit yourself.

What exactly do Mind Flayers have going on downstairs?

Oh, sure, twirling them like a mustache and laughing evilly

Given their oral tentacles, you have some potential there, too.

Thanks for the input folks, I’d seen the wiki entry with much of the info Melrick has on the reproduction and that was what got me wondering – because if they reproduce that way they don’t really need male or female human style down there… although I guessed they’d have some sort of cloaca for solid/liquid waste down because it feels like it makes more sense for a biped to evacuate downwards rather than having to bring it back up and spew it out. It was specifics I was hoping for- in the decades D&D has been around I knew it had some fairly established canon and widely held fanon, but like Melrick I couldn’t see anything specific. I owe someone a short scene with a Mind Flayer and my lack of detailed D&D knowlege counted against me! I know the fuckers have got hands, I might just rely on fingering and assume they’re closer to GI Joe dolls with some kind’ve shit chute.

My personal take was to assume they have the usual hominid genitalia, since other than their lovely oral attributes, they seem fairly standard.