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Just picked this bizarre switcharoo up while proofing the first chapter of Creeps Empornium Peepshow: But if you’re an adult with cash or credit then I open you with welcome arms, my sweet. I can't decide whether or not I just want to leave it like that.

I was trying to help a friend edit a terrible star wars fan film. It was pretty bad, but the line: "As long as the Jedi are pursed by the Empire..." Made me cry I was laughing so hard. I got a visual of Darth Vader with a purse, going around putting very small Jedi in it.

"Where's my ale? I'm dying of thrust." Really? Can I be next?

Professionally, the one I love and cherish: Patient has endured lifelong monogamy. Actual dictation: Patient has ENJOYED lifelong monogamy. Docs are still ribbing me for that one.

As I said in the shoutbox, that was pure gold. Some I've made myself: "I am a neutered side in all of this." "I like the way you simile." "Your eyes are like pools of crisis water." "What the hall is going on here?!" "You move with such grape..." These are very old, since I started getting so many of these I turned off the autocorrect option.

"He set off on his mission with renewed prepuce." (found in a chapter I was proofreading for a friend)

Just going by the title alone, that might actually work!

October Age Verification/Underagers (Current) Confirmed as 18 or older – 64 Now 18, but underage when registered – 11 accounts, 9 actual users Currently underage, deleted once – 20 accounts, 17 actual users Inconclusive data found – 95 users Users posting for minors – 0 users Returning minors – 0 accounts, 0 actual users Total users age checked - 185 Year to Date - 4454 Old Underage Users (by registration year) 2002 – 0 accounts, 0 users deleted, 0 users modified; total of 0 actual users 2003 – 5 accounts, 1 users deleted, 4 users modified; total of 5 actual users 2004 – 7 accounts, 4 users deleted, 3 users modified; total of 7 actual users 2005 – 7 accounts, 3 users deleted, 2 users modified; total of 5 actual users 2006 – 14 accounts, 9 users deleted, 2 users modified; total of 11 actual users 2007 – 13 accounts, 7 users deleted, 4 users modified; total of 11 actual users 2008 – 3 accounts, 2 users deleted, 0 users modified; total of 2 actual users Grand total – 49 accounts, 26 users deleted, 15 users modified; total of 41 actual users Year to Date – 2310 accounts, 1645 users deleted, 313 users modified; total of 1952 actual users Plagiarism Stories deleted (co-author information not provided) – 0, YTD - 4 Stories deleted (permissions not provided) – 2, YTD – 15 Story adoption confirmed – 0, YTD 2 Co – authors verified – 0, YTD – 9 Permissions provided – 2, YTD 24 Unsubstantiated claims of plagiarism – 1, YTD – 9 Users deleted – 0, YTD - 9 Added to the monitor list (for arrival to the archive) – 0, YTD - 4 Posting for another/posting others' work – 0, YTD 7 Added to the Hall of Shame – 0, YTD 3 Trolls/Flamers/Spammers users and content deleted (trolls) – 2, YTD 32 unfounded (trolls) – 0, YTD 2 flaming (instances found) – 2, YTD 11 spam registrations – 0, YTD 25 Other ToS Violations 63 violations resolved Year to Date – 392 The bulk of the violations this month was insufficient/improper story tags. Orphan and Duplicate stories Total orphan stories found and deleted – 0, YTD 0 Stories to merge – 2, YTD 73 Total stories left after merge – 1, YTD 34 Total stories looked at – 2, YTD 73 Shared Accounts and allowed alternate accounts Allowed additional accout – 0, YTD - 1 Found and allowed shared/joint accounts - 2, YTD - 12 Invalid and/or disposable email accounts No issues found with email address – 0, YTD - 0 Users registered with false or disposable mail addresses (deleted when found) – 6, YTD - 22 Users - deleted for non correction bad email address – 158, YTD - 1000 Users - corrected email address issue - 2, YTD - 25 Duplicate Users Processed Users with no duplicates found - 0,YTD - 1 Users merged - 12, YTD - 466 Users where duplicate had no data, and was deleted - 35, YTD - 847 Total extra accounts deleted after processing - 58, YTD - 1567 Total accounts looked at - 105, YTD - 2891 Actual user amount - 47, YTD – 1318

I just got a big laugh compliments of one of my friend's facebook post. "Husband says my nails remind him of skittles. I painted them people and a bright yellow." I started seeing nano sized people stuck upon her nails like flies trapped upon fly paper. this one made me think she is deserving a funniest typo of the day award for this hilarious post.

Alright, this one had a couple of gems: and

*Looks around, doesn't see any of her many from the shoutbox, so comes clean* From the TwiFic, I fixed it, but still amuzing: "Sliding his hands up the columns of Edward’s legs, Jacob rolled the soft orbs along his fingers, marbling at the difference between the hardness in his mouth and the clay like feel."

XD That actually makes me think of Darth Vader running around with a pink, frilly purse and smacking people with it.