Funny Typos

[BronxWench]

"He set off on his mission with renewed prepuce."

(found in a chapter I was proofreading for a friend)

[Shadowknight12]

As I said in the shoutbox, that was pure gold. Some I've made myself:

"I am a neutered side in all of this."

"I like the way you simile."

"Your eyes are like pools of crisis water."

"What the hall is going on here?!"

"You move with such grape..."

These are very old, since I started getting so many of these I turned off the autocorrect option.

[pittwitch]

Professionally, the one I love and cherish: Patient has endured lifelong monogamy. Actual dictation: Patient has ENJOYED lifelong monogamy. Docs are still ribbing me for that one.

[FairySlayer]

My favorite is an exchange between my beta and me over this sentence:

Her tail occasionally whipped sideways as she watched her 'prey' going at it.

^[EF61]

^[FS62]

^[EF63]

[EF61] This was a good little statement…at this point Custard has become so much of a ‘girl’ that it’s nice to slip in a little reminder that she’s also a car.

[FS62] My ears are burning up because it was so hard to not laugh my ass off when I saw the typo in your comment.

[EF63] “I’m Custard…vroom!” XD

I wonder if anyone has ever made the opposite mistake in Knight Rider erotica.

[BronxWench]

"Where's my ale? I'm dying of thrust."

Really? Can I be next?

[Jaded_Star]

I was trying to help a friend edit a terrible star wars fan film. It was pretty bad, but the line:

"As long as the Jedi are pursed by the Empire..."

Made me cry I was laughing so hard. I got a visual of Darth Vader with a purse, going around putting very small Jedi in it.

[Asexual Biped]

I was trying to help a friend edit a terrible star wars fan film. It was pretty bad, but the line:

"As long as the Jedi are pursed by the Empire..."

Made me cry I was laughing so hard. I got a visual of Darth Vader with a purse, going around putting very small Jedi in it.

XD That actually makes me think of Darth Vader running around with a pink, frilly purse and smacking people with it.

[BronxWench]

XD That actually makes me think of Darth Vader running around with a pink, frilly purse and smacking people with it.

Come to the Dark Side... we have accessories...

[Asexual Biped]

Come to the Dark Side... we have accessories...

XD That's awesome!

[RogueMudblood]

From a fic I was just skimming in the archive:

"I didn't know canine dogs could do that."

[Melrick]

From a fic I was just skimming in the archive:

"I didn't know canine dogs could do that."

lol As apposed to what, reptile dogs?

[Shadowknight12]

lol As apposed to what, reptile dogs?

Perhaps it was "asinine dogs"?

[ApolloImperium]

*Looks around, doesn't see any of her many from the shoutbox, so comes clean*

From the TwiFic, I fixed it, but still amuzing: "Sliding his hands up the columns of Edward’s legs, Jacob rolled the soft orbs along his fingers, marbling at the difference between the hardness in his mouth and the clay like feel."

[RogueMudblood]

From a story in the archive:

Thank you for readying

And another:

This story in no way represents cannon

[Anesor]

Does that mean the story is always shooting its mouth off?

[BronxWench]

Proofreading for a friend again... ::sigh::

"Her skin was a dusky grey, her hair off white and her eyes a deep vibrant violate."

[Shadowknight12]

Proofreading for a friend again... ::sigh::

"Her skin was a dusky grey, her hair off white and her eyes a deep vibrant violate."

I see you've escalated from respiratory rape to the ocular kind... my, oh my.

[BronxWench]

I see you've escalated from respiratory rape to the ocular kind... my, oh my.

It's not a terribly inspiring trend, is it?

[DemonGoddess]

I suppose gam rape is next?

[RogueMudblood]

from the archive: "[He] gave his blessing to woe his niece."

[BronxWench]

from the archive: "[He] gave his blessing to woe his niece."

[RogueMudblood]

from the archive: "cupping his sacque"

definition: sacque - a woman's full loose hiplength jacket

Also: "slipped quickly into her belly" ...

[pittwitch]

I'm still stuck on the dude who inserted "two fingers into his shaft."

Yeoowch!

[SynnoveD]

This isn't story related but it's hilarious. I was a 911 dispatcher a few years back and when you take a call, you need to send out a description of a suspect or contact, etc. to the police in the area. I type fast already, and at the end of each line you had to hit enter, regardless of typos. *shrug*

This is a watered down version of the line that I sent to the officers in the corresponding beat: white male/30s/grn eye/brn buzzcunt

Recently I was writing during a rather late night/early morning -- the quote was something like "It was something he had to get sued to..." instead of used.

Another was " You sound like you're chewing cocks!" Instead of rocks. Whoops!

Edited January 16, 2011 by Synnøve Dain

[Techno-Ninja]

From the archive: a frequent use of the word "summit" in place of "submit."

First time a smut scene has ever made me think of mountains. XD