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Everything posted by pippychick
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Gifts wrapped this evening = 1
Gifts waiting to be wrapped = [in the style of Edward Woodward in The Wicker Man]: Oh, Jesus Christ… Jesus…. Jesus Christ… [WAILS IN TERROR AND DESPAIR]
Total Gifts wrapped = 1
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I seem to have embarked upon cross stitching. If anyone would like a christmas card with a little cross stich picture on it of a robin, a snowflake, a reindeer or some such silliness, please pm me.

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French knots were invented by Satan.
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Okay, I have my order. I want a 6 foot by 6 foot dragon. I want it red.
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I will replicate something in miniature… something like these:


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There is no mead in the mead shop. Not a single drop. Not until after Christmas, anyway. In desperation, I walked into the ASDA earlier to ask if they sold it. They’d obviously never heard the word before in their lives, and insisted on pronouncing it as: “Meeeeeed…?” That is what I call a wasted youth, and *waggles finger* it’s a sign of just what has gone wrong with this country since the time of King Arthur.
Let’s make Britain great again. Let’s make mead! We could employ at least… ten people! And thousands and thousands of bees. That will give the bees work to do, and stop them from dying all over the place from worklessness. We have lots of bees, all doing nothing for most of the year. Hiding in their homes with the curtains drawn while the rest of us go out to work in the morning.
We all know China is making cheap mead on the side, flooding the market with it. That was a fantastic day… but anyway! We will install a giant net over the UK, keeping our bees safe, and foreign bees out!
/satire
Tip! To make this parody for yourself, mix equal parts Donald Trump and Iain Duncan Smith. Full recipe details can be found on any mainstream news outlet.
Oh, but sadly I wasn't kidding about the mead
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Make those foreign bees pay for the net!
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- BronxWench and pippychick
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2016 is not done with us yet. Goodbye, Andrew Sachs, and thank you for making me laugh.
“I know nothing!”
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This year needs a do over. Or something.

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- pippychick and BronxWench
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Yep, yet another sad loss.
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- BronxWench and pippychick
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Oh, my goodness, I know… it’s heartbreaking, how many we’ve lost this year.
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Advantages to online xmas shopping: Done in an hour, easy, get stuff for cheaper than out in town, get stuff you couldn’t get in town.
Disadvantages: The delivery. I’m waiting for around thirty items, but today, if I’m lucky, the postman will deliver one or two of them at best. Also, I went back to bed at 8:15 am, then got an email at 8:26 which I didn’t read, advising me a driver would turn up between 9:25 and 10:25. Seriously!? I woke up at 9:45 to find an annoying card. They didn’t even manage to wake the dog up. They must have tiptoed to my door… *growls*
Right now I officially hate Christmas. And I was doing so well this year.

I can’t help imagining how much worse Scrooge would have become if he’d woken up on Christmas day morning to find cards from the Ghosts of Christmas Past, Present and Future saying: “We’re sorry we missed you!”
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However stressful it ends up being, Christmas is always better with kids around
They get excited and stuff.
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Yes, and whether you have money, or don’t have money, it certainly makes it all worthwhile!
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My mother and I have an agreement – we don’t spend much. I am not about to compete with other people; that way madness lies. You don’t need money for christmas, you’re right – just loved ones

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Last month, a part of my filling fell out. I say fell, I was actually reliving my childhood with a surplus halloween Drumstick lollipop. Today, my appointment at the dentist came up. Thankfully, they didn’t need to do anything painful. They just removed my temporary filling, cleaned it and redid it. I feel like I just got a get out jail free card while on death row. Also, my dental hygeine is great and they don’t need to see me ever again (or for twelve months, which is much the same thing).
Excuse me while I slump into a relaxed pile of vaguely human shaped happiness. Then I will update stuff.
I will also think twice from now on before reliving my childhood with chewy sweet things.


