GeorgeGlass

Pumpkin Spice: First, the skewering of the now-tired pumpkin spice trend is well deserved. (I just saw Pumpkin Spice Cheerios at the grocery store the other day.) Second, the idea of a succubus who can adjust her scent (and flavor) at will was very creative. And third, in a Halloween horror story, there's no bigger twist than a happy ending! I enjoyed it.

I think both choices contributed importantly to the story.

Little Red Riding Hood: I liked the role-reversal, especially because it keeps you thinking about what Red is going to do to her would-be attacker—and not about what else might happen to him. Nicely done.

Re: Just Doin’ What We Do (A Halloween Story) Thank you! The werewolf legend was doubly helpful to me in writing this story: It provided both a plot twist and an excuse for a bunch of kids to have sex. I had a terrific one. Hope you did, too.

Re: Just Doin’ What We Do (A Halloween Story) This is why they don't let me write for TV. You can imagine what Sally would be doing to Linus in that pumpkin patch. Writing this story felt almost like writing a mystery: had to drop hints here and there without giving everything away. It was fun. It seems to me that, in Halloween stories in particular, rural Southerners tend to be portrayed as either superstitious yokels or villainous yokels. I wanted to subvert that trope in this story. I googled “Halloween party games” for ideas about what games Joe Bob and Emily might have the kids play. The first hit was a page on the Reader's Digest website, which mentioned the broom-and-balloon race. It took some doing to keep track of names, ages, physical appearance, costumes, and who would end up with whom. I had to make a chart. I wanted to include some were-creatures other than werewolves, and I've always liked tigers. I also thought it would add to the mystery of what was going on, because readers might wonder why Emily and Joe Bob considered it important for June and Naveen to pair up. Volunteer work should be rewarding. Thanks for the beta and the review!

Thanks! I do indeed plan to write more stories. Also, I have some other stories that are already posted (or at least partly posted) that you might enjoy, like “Country Summer” and “The Last Toy.”

Working Title: Sherlock Homeboy Fandom: Sherlock Holmes Plot: Sherlock Langston Holmes is a poor teenager from Chicago's South Side. He has a gift for solving crimes that variously earns him respect and enmity in his community and among the police. He survives by his wits and with the help of his best friend, Johnny Watson, a varsity linebacker who dreams of one day going to medical school. Fatal flaws: 1. There's no story here -- characters and setting, but no plot. 2. I don't know jack about what life is like for poor black teenagers on the South Side. 3. Does anybody still say “homeboy”? Keeping or abandoning? Abandoning

Sweater, Desiderius Price Oh, how I wish I didn't find this story to be such a believable portrayal of human behavior. Cateline’s misery (as seen in hindsight), and the eagerness of so many to jump on the bandwagon to criticize and shame her, felt very real. Trick or Treat? Tahn Funny take on trick-or-treating. Glad I didn't read it over lunch, though.

Author: George Glass Title: Just Doin’ What We Do (A Halloween Story) Summary: A couple hosts an unusual children's Halloween party on their farm. Feedback: But of course. Fandom: Original Pairing: N/A Warnings: COMPLETE MF Minor1 Oneshot Solo story or chaptered story: Solo URL: http://original.adult-fanfiction.org/story.php?no=600108388 Review responses: http://www2.adult-fanfiction.org/forum/topic/55777-george-glass-review-responses-original-fiction/

That she did! Thanks, Manta and DG!

There isn’t any recaptcha. I click “Post New Chapter,” and it tells me that the new chapter has been posted. But it hasn’t. Tried again just now and got the same result.

And I’m a big ol’ copycat, so I posted early, too. Or rather, I tried, but it’s not sticking for some reason. Also, I could not for the life of me figure out how to put a non-numbered summary below an autonumbered title in the TOC. Little help?

And there I thought the black diamonds indicated stories with a high level of difficulty.

Thank you! *bows* My philosophy of fanfiction is that it has to be faithful to the source material to the point that you couldn't just swap in characters from some other fandom and still have the story make sense. So one of my chief goals in writing this long string of sex scenes is to suit each scene to the characters involved. Good point about the fluids. As for the exercise, well, some consequences can't be avoided... No spoilers! Never apologize; I'm always happy to get your reviews. As for when I'll update next, I'm currently working on a couple of Halloween stories that I'd like to finish within the next week, so I may not get back to “Whoops” until after those are finished.

Yup. They are still rational, at least to the extent that it helps them to get what they need. Oh yes, there's plenty of both pleasure and guilt to go around. These issues will definitely come up, but maybe not in a timely fashion. Poor Lincoln... Luna actually plays a lot of different instruments, which surely would include the bass. We shall see. That's probably the trickiest part of writing this fic -- making the sex scenes believable but keeping them short enough that this story doesn't become the War and Peace of cartoon porn fics.

Probably no more than I got for my Phineas and Ferb stories, though. I’m used to that by now. Thanks! That’s what I was going for, because I started reading a story in which Lisa’s lisp was visible in every line of her dialogue and that made it almost unreadable. It’s powerful, but not mindless. More discussion to come. Lisa’s formula was designed to make her female mice want to mate with the male one. She didn’t want the females to just lez out on one another rather than mating with Pythagoras, so she made the formula very targeted. Also, it didn’t occur to her that Pythagoras might be freaked out by the sudden megadose of attention from the females. Responses to your other two reviews are forthcoming. Thanks for reviewing!

Oh, yes indeed. Like Dexter, Lisa has a classic case of Mad Scientist Syndrome: She’s so focused on what she COULD do that she forgets to consider whether she SHOULD do it. I don’t mind the fourth-wall breaks on the show, but I had to ask the advice of the folks here on AFF about how best to make it work in the story. It was on their advice that I decided to use a different font and indent the text to indicate when Lincoln is speaking. Thanks! I wanted to make sure that it wasn’t just window dressing. I began writing this story because I liked the plot and setup even more than the payoff (ie, the actual sex). The angst thing is weird to me, because Lincoln doesn’t strike me as being any more prone to it than your average cartoon character. Given that The Loud House is a lighthearted comedy (with some messages about family thrown in), I really don’t want to deviate too far from that tone, even with the addition of sex. It ain’t easy! This thing has turned out to be a bit more of a marathon (for me AND Lincoln) than I anticipated—mostly because I was so focused on the setup that I didn’t think about how much payoff there would have to be. I guess I’m a bit like Lisa that way.

Best title so far. Very trendy.

Thanks! I wanted to end the chapter with a bit of a surprise.

I’m in! Title: Polled. Summary: A call from a political pollster takes an eerie turn.

FS, you have the patience of a saint. I am honored to call you a fellow sicko.

From Saint_Wanker_Kris on October 05, 2016 One thing I’ve heard many times about the dom/sub relationship is that often, it’s really the submissive who is in control, and the dom is playing out the sub’s fantasies. I like the idea of that sort of balance. Well, who wouldn't? I agree that Irving's near-worship of Phineas and Ferb might well have a romantic component, but he's expressed interest in girls, too. In this case, I'm happy to leave the meaning of his “Whoa” squeak open to interpretation. Thanks! There's also a little music video on YouTube that quickly runs through the names, faces, and personalities of the 11 Loud kids. Certainly. For the record, I consider “Star's Crossed Lovers” to be a Starco story -- just not in the conventional sense. No rush. And thanks for all the reviews!

Right. She's only fifteen, and she and Jeremy are taking things with the appropriate slowness, but that doesn't mean she's not curious, or fantasizing about what she'd like to do with him one day. I could see that being of interest. I'm pretty much leaving Isabella out of this one (except for one cameo). I want to focus specifically on the characters’ incestuous feelings, and I’m concerned that bringing up the Isabella issue would overcomplicate things. As for Candace’s fantasy...no spoilers. Thanks! Those are really fun to write. Wow. Thank you! Thank you again! They can be like that. I don’t know if this is your style, but I find it helpful to write stories out of order, starting with the scenes that are most fully formed in your mind. You’re welcome!