InvidiaRed

Word choice as in are you disguising things. Are events transpiring openly or is there more going on that what’s readily being presented on the surface. Context can paint a very different picture of whats going on. A single well placed clue can do more than a ton of less subtle hints. How are you disgusing things if things are not as they appear. Ex: It seemed as though a trick of light but the ruby seemed to have an inner fire all its own for an instant. (A set up that the ruby isn't normal) Ex: Is it really the ticking of a clock or is it a timer steadily ticking down? What kind of tick is it? Is it a tick tock. or is it a steady tick tick tick… BOOM Ex: Molly felt uneasy being locked in this room. The grand father clock’s ominous ticking didn’t seem quite right it was as if the ticking wasn’t perfectly synched. The obviousness of the sudden lack of sound brought attention to its sudden absence. “Oh shi-” Molly didn’t have time to finish as the room upended in a sudden conflagration. Bringing attention to certain details or lack of details. Etc..

Somehow a story is manifesting in this thread. So Succumb to the Glory Of Bob. And add your own

Don’t explain the Bob

Never change :3

thank you for clarification and thank you for information.

It depends. Is it a mystery story? If so stick to subtle hints. Don’t punish perceptive readers. A smile, movements and character behavior can all lead someone to accurately foretell what will happen long before events catch up. For everything else. Word choice.

I can tell you are delightfully twisted in all the right places. But I think they’re going for more that innocentish teenage exploration of themselves and others.

I disagree. It was funny.

Writer Beware sounds ominous. Is there a difference between e-book publishing and regular?

I do want to publish someday and I don’t want to go into this half-cocked. Any thoughts? Tips? Advice? Any site or resource I should avoid? Hints on where to start?

There is only Bob- Bob Prime

The last Non-Bob can’t leave that vault no matter how much he tries.He’s already lost a hand the moment it passed the threshold.- Other Bob

references I feel should be sparingly used. As popular culture changes so fast as things pop in and out of popular consciousness at a rapid pace. You can inadvertently date your writing.

I ship Bob 69 with Bob 89 =p Bobageddon happened. The day everyone became Bob or perhaps catastrophic devastation as a result of every non-Bob simultaneously exiting reality. Only Bob Prime remembers the Pre Bob times. Perhaps it was both. The Bob world is too different from the world it was. With the Bobwars finally coming to a close as the Bob Hegemony and the Bob Sovereignty destroyed perhaps the Confederacy of Bob will have a chance at peace. Even as the alliance of independent kingdoms of Bob struggles to reclaim what was lost. I shall do my best to chronicle the events of Post Bobageddon. On my sacred honor yours dutifully-Bob the 3rd

Highlander reference. There can only be one

In a story with everyone with the same name it would be Bob Prime/Imposter adjective Bob Or Bob/Other Bob Or Bob/Bob the 42nd/Bob the third

You are forgetting Challenge. A demon is almost always an immortal being. A being with a completely different mindset than any human. Summoning one for the challenge and glory of defeating, understand or otherwise just getting one up over a being like that is an accomplishment in of itself.

But who the is the Bobest? Who among all of them is truly “the Bob” Bob Prime The Apex pinnacle of what it means to be Bob? There can only be one “true” Bob.

Don’t overthink it. Stick to your lore. an ancient Chinese inspired culture is one of the easier ones. Since China had an incredible amount of dynasties and cities. Gods are harder. I’d start top down with a pantheon, then the hierarchy etc. It also depends on what kinda god feel you are going for. Are they like the greeks flawed but bringing order to the universe. Animal headed or more fantasy D&D based. Naming places are easier than you give credit. The misty mountains are indeed misty. Clown cave is indeed filled with clowns. Simplicity at times is better than wit.

Well considering it would be something like this. Ann smiled as they walked the mall. “Kim you’ve been such a goodgirl this whole time. I think you deserve a reward.” Kim’s heart thundered in her chest. She was mortified. They were in a mall for god’s sake. Too many people. Someone would hear, Someone would see. Ann’s hand gracefully sank into her purse and suddenly Kim’s panties tingled to life. A gentle soft shuddering. Kim gasped and quickly put her hand over her mouth. “Do keep up Kim, Or I’ll turn it to max and everyone will know.” “Mom no-” Kim begged as her mother’s hand reached into her purse and the shuddering of her panties increased. it was just a little louder too. Ann trotted into the shoe store as she turned to her careful moving daughter. Her hand rested just so easily off the side of her purse. Ann wiggled her fingers just enough to get the point across.

http://members.adult-fanfiction.org/profile.php?no=1296877009&view=story&zone=original I would like some reviews.

What is the antagonist for? What genre is the story in? How complex is the main protagonist? What are the interactions between protagonist and antagonist? Are they friendly and jovial? Or are they die hard someone is going to die the moment one of them sees each other? Sometimes the story just needs a complete monster. And sometimes the whys are much more interesting than the antagonist themselves. The most interesting questions come to mind if the main character is the villain of the story.

Why not include links? I’m always looking for something to read and sometimes all you need is a little promotion. http://members.adult-fanfiction.org/profile.php?no=1296877009&view=story&zone=original

http://www.behindthename.com/ Usually. However, Sometimes the character’s name just pops out. Fully formed.

Rape is an unfortunate reality of life. It regretfully happens as the stats show https://www.bjs.gov/index.cfm?ty=tp&tid=317 Neither gender has immunity. Though this denial of male rape seems to slowly be lessening. http://www.slate.com/articles/double_x/doublex/2014/04/male_rape_in_america_a_new_study_reveals_that_men_are_sexually_assaulted.html It depends on what the usage of the rape is. Is it for shock value? An unfortunate turn of events? Is it a make or break moment for the character. Does the character refuse to let such a horror break them. Do they move past it or ultimately are they stuck in permanent victim mode. The context is what matters.