Desiderius Price

Oh, I’m below average, so I’ve cursed some characters with micropenis Another with one so bent the guy can’t take a piss without getting it on himself. A third one with chewed foreskin (girlfriend issues). As a whole, I prefer keeping the average, well, average. With my potter fanfic, there are exceptions...involving magic.

As somebody who prefers to write my characters as being naked…. I will frequently add a bit of description to the state of the breasts/dick; might be sag, swaying with the gait, so cold the balls are non-existent, maybe its pubic hair, etc. I do this because it’s a reminder that the character is naked w/o having to repeatedly write “naked”. Also, I typically avoid absolute measurements, because I don’t really need to know it’s “K-cup”, and TBH, that’s less informative IMO than simply stating “big” vs “small”. If two are standing side-by-side, that’s where the relative comparisons might come in, especially if it’s from the POV male who’ll check. It’s fairly limited when I’ll write an absolute (a bio, a ruler, a dispute to clothes sizing, etc) and needed for the story. Now, the original question was in regards to introductions, I suppose a bit more is okay, if it’s relevant, to help introduce, but the reader typically doesn’t need a full bio there either. “Helga was a big, busty, blonde woman who staffed the kitchen.” And you can get more details later in the scene as she’s complaining about her constant back pain, or twenty fifth pregnancy.

I know some authors seem to like to dwell like the reader is bringing a ruler to every person the see? “Excuse me ma’am, Federal Boobie Inspector, please step this way for measurements.” ZZ-Cup? But unless the breasts are unusual, I typically don’t go out of my way to describe them, let the reader’s imagination (likely as perverted as yours) go to work with whatever they fancy. Generally, I prefer to stick to “larger” or “smaller” plus quality. Not everybody is “large”, should have modest/small ones around too (unless there’s a universal law requiring everybody to get breast-augmentation surgery or something). Also, large breasts need good support & can give back pain (as far as I know, not that gender). And, there’s more than size to consider, there’s firmness, sag, etc, again, if significant or another character is playing with them. For male characters, similar thing – circumcision or not is the first thing I’ll establish. Size, if unusual/important, might be mentioned. However, comparisons might happen more often, so you have two characters together and the difference is noticeable, then you might establish that one character’s todger is longer/thinner than the other. My $0.02 worth.

Could be worse. Them: Can you write a Harry Potter/Game of Thrones crossover? Me: No. Them: Can you write a Harry Potter/Game of Thrones crossover? Me: No Them: Can you write a Harry Potter/Game of Thrones crossover? It’s like, can’t they read the first response?

39761

39759

39757

39755

39753

39751

39749

39747

39745

39743

39741

And your parents/family/friends who stumble across your story will also know that you liked them doing carnal fornication, with watersports and tentacles.

39739

39737

39735

Knowing people are reading is great, but also knowing they’re reading your perversions (and enjoying them) is definitely cringe-worthy too.

39733

39731

39729