I go for the realism factor in my writing, hence the desire to balance it both ways, some times with toys/aids, other times, without. And sometimes, a carrot, chocolate syrup, or maple syrup works. However, this reminds me of Ash & Buck in my potter fanfic, get a double-ended vibrating dildo made with their cocks; misplace it, and come down to breakfast with Buck’s mother mixing pancake batter with it.