Strange_idea Posted May 31, 2018 Report Share Posted May 31, 2018 So I’ve been thinking, and you have some good opportunities for this story…. but first I have some questions. First, when you say he goes through the events of the first game and raising hell, do you mean on-screen? I’d say go for it, it’ll let you develop characters better, and ease people into the bigger world. plus, let you lay hints at later lands, making it easier to bring them in. Plus, it’d let you build on the fallen heroes characters a bit. Oberon, for example, has a lot of room to be interesting and to cause growth in hiccup. I’d reccomend you take your time with events, no just one-chapter per area do some more, not too many but a few. it lets you get to know the new guys and girl, and prevent things from becoming boring. even in an ‘adult’ fan-fiction, pacing is important. an example I’d use is ‘pokemon reset bloodlines’, also a harem story but pacing itself and making each important even a mini-arc. It’s more writing, but if you want i could help you with that. Second, are the sorceresses going to betray hiccup to the old overlord like gnarl did? that could be interesting, they could be punished by reducing them to ordinary human...ish women and have hiccup give their powers to the new girls. OR he could use that as an opportunity to grow, listening to other people and moving away from their overlord teachings. they’d probably be magically forced to be subservient to him after that, and mirage would be loving it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jwsponky Posted May 31, 2018 Author Report Share Posted May 31, 2018 5 hours ago, Strange_idea said: So I’ve been thinking, and you have some good opportunities for this story…. but first I have some questions. First, when you say he goes through the events of the first game and raising hell, do you mean on-screen? I’d say go for it, it’ll let you develop characters better, and ease people into the bigger world. plus, let you lay hints at later lands, making it easier to bring them in. Plus, it’d let you build on the fallen heroes characters a bit. Oberon, for example, has a lot of room to be interesting and to cause growth in hiccup. I’d reccomend you take your time with events, no just one-chapter per area do some more, not too many but a few. it lets you get to know the new guys and girl, and prevent things from becoming boring. even in an ‘adult’ fan-fiction, pacing is important. an example I’d use is ‘pokemon reset bloodlines’, also a harem story but pacing itself and making each important even a mini-arc. It’s more writing, but if you want i could help you with that. Second, are the sorceresses going to betray hiccup to the old overlord like gnarl did? that could be interesting, they could be punished by reducing them to ordinary human...ish women and have hiccup give their powers to the new girls. OR he could use that as an opportunity to grow, listening to other people and moving away from their overlord teachings. they’d probably be magically forced to be subservient to him after that, and mirage would be loving it. My plan had been to have the first game's events on screen... or would that be on page with a story?.. I do admit I'm undecided if each area will get several medium length or one long one… As for the sorceresses, my vague plan had them less betraying Hiccup than having their hands tied in terms of stopping the old Overlord, much to their regret since they never liked him New idea for the Mirage/La rivalry. What if Mirage started out as the evil incarnate of the Aladdin show, but at some point La summoned/beseeched Mirage and trapped her with an array of an it magic or containment runes to drain Mirage's power, eventually giving the original Overlord the weakened feline to save her own hide? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Strange_idea Posted May 31, 2018 Report Share Posted May 31, 2018 12 minutes ago, Jwsponky said: New idea for the Mirage/La rivalry. What if Mirage started out as the evil incarnate of the Aladdin show, but at some point La summoned/beseeched Mirage and trapped her with an array of an it magic or containment runes to drain Mirage's power, eventually giving the original Overlord the weakened feline to save her own hide? has the experience taught her, if not humility, affection for hiccup? this is great either way, i just think that would be a neat add-on 13 minutes ago, Jwsponky said: As for the sorceresses, my vague plan had them less betraying Hiccup than having their hands tied in terms of stopping the old Overlord, much to their regret since they never liked him hmmm...they could be robbed of their power while he does so, leaving them helpless to resist the coming empire and requiring hiccup to go find help. if we do the dark tower collective bedroom thing, the sorceresses could train the girls in magic and combat, allowing them to send better aid to hiccup. it also adds some urgency to attacks on the tower. 19 minutes ago, Jwsponky said: My plan had been to have the first game's events on screen... or would that be on page with a story?.. I do admit I'm undecided if each area will get several medium length or one long one… it’s up to you, but if you need a beta or to bounce ideas i’m here. i can provide examples of harem stories for pacing if you like… mostly pokemon oddly enough. i like long ones, since it allows better growth and more going on. the trick is to keep things happening and remember the layers. overly drawn romance can be painful, but if you make it an interesting overlord retlling with the hrem things creeping in you can keep people around longer and do more with it, i think. anyone else? agree? disagree? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jwsponky Posted May 31, 2018 Author Report Share Posted May 31, 2018 Not sure about humility, but shed probably be fond of Hiccup given that he was the only one who knew about her predicament, which would just be Hiccup and the other sorceresses, that didn't tease her about it. I admit I hadn't considered the possibility of the previous Overlord draining their powers, though the idea has merit... I had been thinking more along the lines of 'he seized control of the Heart, they have to obey him'. Um, not much of a pokemon fan, but if ye have recommendations for stories of other franchises, lay them on me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Strange_idea Posted May 31, 2018 Report Share Posted May 31, 2018 2 minutes ago, Jwsponky said: Not sure about humility, but shed probably be fond of Hiccup given that he was the only one who knew about her predicament, which would just be Hiccup and the other sorceresses, that didn't tease her about it. I admit I hadn't considered the possibility of the previous Overlord draining their powers, though the idea has merit... I had been thinking more along the lines of 'he seized control of the Heart, they have to obey him'. Um, not much of a pokemon fan, but if ye have recommendations for stories of other franchises, lay them on me. it’d give him some nice gimmick attacks, hiccups custom minions could be immune so he uses the powers of the sorceresses pokemon reset bloodlines: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/9939848/31/Pokemon-Reset-Bloodlines ongoing story with a harem background plot, paces itself well, does a lot of clever world-building and the girls are working their way up to approaching ash about the idea, having realisticly has some trouble swallowing it a new world: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10023670/1/A-New-World ash is transported to a pornoraphic parody of the pokemon world…. and still takes time to warm up to the harem idea. characters are introduced well before becoming girlfriends, and dozens of chapter before leeping with him, and some even leave the story and come back. anyton else on this thread, can you recommend a well-paced harem story? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jwsponky Posted May 31, 2018 Author Report Share Posted May 31, 2018 4 minutes ago, Strange_idea said: it’d give him some nice gimmick attacks, hiccups custom minions could be immune so he uses the powers of the sorceresses That might work… Admittedly changing the topic, but if I were to use my idle idea from yesterday of having Hiccup expand into the Hercules version of Greece, any ideas on how to get Hiccup into conflict with Hades, to bring about my other idle idea of turning Megara into a demigod with Hades' powers? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Strange_idea Posted May 31, 2018 Report Share Posted May 31, 2018 i thought it was self-evident. the raising hell campaign. He’s the forgotten god, megara is… i dunno, a local, or his guide? I can think of something else, but i’ll need some time i was also going to suggest he actuall RESCUE oberon, or at least try since he’s a lot more sincere about being a good guy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jwsponky Posted May 31, 2018 Author Report Share Posted May 31, 2018 Just now, Strange_idea said: i thought it was self-evident. the raising hell campaign. He’s the forgotten god, megara is… i dunno, a local, or his guide? I can think of something else, but i’ll need some time i was also going to suggest he actuall RESCUE oberon, or at least try since he’s a lot more sincere about being a good guy I am rather annoyed with my self that that did not occur to me... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Strange_idea Posted May 31, 2018 Report Share Posted May 31, 2018 some of the hercules the series girls could be bosses, or part of the torment, or prisoners that wind up serving megara. plus, it’s give a reason for the ressurection ability, megara’s on his side. she could send messages via the ressurected minions… or resurrected girls if needed Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Strange_idea Posted May 31, 2018 Report Share Posted May 31, 2018 no worries, it happens Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jwsponky Posted May 31, 2018 Author Report Share Posted May 31, 2018 2 minutes ago, Strange_idea said: some of the hercules the series girls could be bosses, or part of the torment, or prisoners that wind up serving megara. plus, it’s give a reason for the ressurection ability, megara’s on his side. she could send messages via the ressurected minions… or resurrected girls if needed This would work… Though as often seems to be the case, not five minutes after I ask someone for advice, my imagination sees fit to cough up an idea, though admittedly this might not be my best one… Granted Hades only used it in one episode of the show, but he still possesses the Kronus stone, which is essentially kryptonite to gods, so what if the other Grecian gods approached Hiccup, who the gods likely would have heard of, since even though he was from a different pantheon, he still managed to kill a god, to see if they could hire him to do away with Hades before said death deity can manage to do away with them, or at least get the Kronus stone away from Hades? Though your mention of including other girls from Hercules has given me the passing thought of making them demigods too, though the only combination I can think of is the prophetic Cassandra receiving the wisdom of Athena... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Strange_idea Posted May 31, 2018 Report Share Posted May 31, 2018 ooh! what if they’re the reincarnations of the gods.… because Hades already killed them? and that’s why evil is so rampant in the world? they’re weakened at the moment, but can open up a portal and send him through, and maybe take his place when he’s almost trapped in there, planning to rebuild the void as the afterlife should be? or not, they could just be allies after that, a sort of oracle system since they’re not up to god status again yet. medusa could be aphrodite, due to a prting shot from hades…. or maybe galatea is, zeus could be a female herc? i dunno. Tempest the amazon could be athena, electra could be nemeis (god of justice, hence the furies), pandora could be…. hmmm. the idea has potential, it just needs time to grow ooh, what if they’re prisoners he has to pick up in the underworld, and he doesn’t know they’re gods at first? only one or two go to hiccup to beg his help, because the rest are trapped in the underworld already. you don;t have to show them all, they could say to hiccup that they’ll do the rest after he defeats hades. maybe electra or pandora is hades sealed into a young girl…. this could also be used to develop hiccup’s character, showing him that not eveyone with power is evil and that he can do some real good by working against things like hades. or that not every hero is incompetent or corrupt, something which he stews over after their gone. patricularly in the wake of the old overlord’s actions and meeting oberon again. plus it would mean the power of ‘evil’ is weakening and explain why things seemed so good for a while, at least until the empire seals them away again as ‘magic’ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jwsponky Posted May 31, 2018 Author Report Share Posted May 31, 2018 4 minutes ago, Strange_idea said: ooh! what if they’re the reincarnations of the gods.… because Hades already killed them? and that’s why evil is so rampant in the world? they’re weakened at the moment, but can open up a portal and send him through, and maybe take his place when he’s almost trapped in there, planning to rebuild the void as the afterlife should be? or not, they could just be allies after that, a sort of oracle system since they’re not up to god status again yet. medusa could be aphrodite, due to a prting shot from hades…. or maybe galatea is, zeus could be a female herc? i dunno. Tempest the amazon could be athena, electra could be nemeis (god of justice, hence the furies), pandora could be…. hmmm. the idea has potential, it just needs time to grow ooh, what if they’re prisoners he has to pick up in the underworld, and he doesn’t know they’re gods at first? only one or two go to hiccup to beg his help, because the rest are trapped in the underworld already. you don;t have to show them all, they could say to hiccup that they’ll do the rest after he defeats hades. maybe electra or pandora is hades sealed into a young girl…. this could also be used to develop hiccup’s character, showing him that not eveyone with power is evil and that he can do some real good by working against things like hades. or that not every hero is incompetent or corrupt, something which he stews over after their gone. patricularly in the wake of the old overlord’s actions and meeting oberon again. plus it would mean the power of ‘evil’ is weakening and explain why things seemed so good for a while, at least until the empire seals them away again as ‘magic’ This has possibilities... though my over active mind has come up with another idea involving a god approaching Hiccup due to his infamy as a godslayer… What if Hades, admitting to himself that his schemes just aren't working, was the one to contact Hiccup hoping to bribe him into attacking Olympus, possibly with the promise that Hiccup could keep the goddesses to do with what he likes? Granted I doubt I'd have Hiccup go for it, given that he only went after the Forgotten God because he kidnapped Hiccup's citizens, while the Olympians had done nothing to him... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Strange_idea Posted May 31, 2018 Report Share Posted May 31, 2018 the monster-ness, various curses and female forms could be part of their torment Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Strange_idea Posted May 31, 2018 Report Share Posted May 31, 2018 hmmm. i’m about to have dinner, but i think i can twist these two together. hades being a driving force works REALLY well, since he was in the film. back soon-ish…. more ish than soon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jwsponky Posted May 31, 2018 Author Report Share Posted May 31, 2018 Eh, take your time Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Strange_idea Posted May 31, 2018 Report Share Posted May 31, 2018 (edited) female icarus could be hermes, due to being zeus’s (herc girl’s) right hand god, and being a fast flyer helen of troy could be aphrodite, due to her being beautiful and causing chaos (unintentionally) and playing people against each other. she cuold comment that hiccup has ‘quite a future ahead of him’ medusa could be poseidon, due to mythological irony. syrinx the nymph could be demeter megara BECOMES hera after marrying girl-herc, there being no hera yet galatea could be hephastus, due to the connection to aphrodite and being a sculpture (i.e., craft) Hades should be the one to start everything. he kidnaps hiccups citizens, and maybe his sorceresses, then approaches him in disguise (as hecate, maybe) and sends hiccup after them to finish off the weakened gods in the abyss. they always can sense or see him coming.can see or sense him coming, so him coming, so he send hiccup after them to catch them off-guard. or maybe gods cannot kill gods, even weakened, so he needs a champion to act on his behalf. hiccup is suspicious, but running into the fallen heroes helps hades case…. except he winds up rescuing the gods from them, which lets him get to know them and clues them in that something isn’t right. Megara could be hades prophet/hiccup’s escort, a soul he forces into doing this who’s also been slipping hints to the gods and winds up leading a revolt against hades when she gets the chance and finds out everything. maybe the gods cannot say who they are, so she didn’t know Edited May 31, 2018 by Strange_idea Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jwsponky Posted May 31, 2018 Author Report Share Posted May 31, 2018 (edited) 42 minutes ago, Strange_idea said: female icarus could be hermes, due to being zeus’s (herc girl’s) right hand god, and being a fast flyer helen of troy could be aphrodite, due to her being beautiful and causing chaos (unintentionally) and playing people against each other. she cuold comment that hiccup has ‘quite a future ahead of him’ medusa could be poseidon, due to mythological irony. syrinx the nymph could be demeter megara BECOMES hera after marrying girl-herc, there being no hera yet galatea could be hephastus, due to the connection to aphrodite and being a sculpture (i.e., craft) Hades should be the one to start everything. he kidnaps hiccups citizens, and maybe his sorceresses, then approaches him in disguise (as hecate, maybe) and sends hiccup after them to finish off the weakened gods in the abyss. they always can sense or see him coming.can see or sense him coming, so him coming, so he send hiccup after them to catch them off-guard. or maybe gods cannot kill gods, even weakened, so he needs a champion to act on his behalf. hiccup is suspicious, but running into the fallen heroes helps hades case…. except he winds up rescuing the gods from them, which lets him get to know them and clues them in that something isn’t right. Megara could be hades prophet/hiccup’s escort, a soul he forces into doing this who’s also been slipping hints to the gods and winds up leading a revolt against hades when she gets the chance and finds out everything. maybe the gods cannot say who they are, so she didn’t know Hmm... This could work... Though now I'm struck by an idea for a running gag of Hiccup not believing in gods, due to the Silent Order of Heaven's Peak declaring him a god, and if I keep him and Hades separate characters, the Forgotten God's defeat by basically tricking him into dropping the cavern roof on his head, declaring them nothing more than magic users of admittedly great power and delusions of grandeur. Edited May 31, 2018 by Jwsponky Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Strange_idea Posted May 31, 2018 Report Share Posted May 31, 2018 that works, and after he leaves, megara-hades could start up a secondary project with the afterlife, a personal suite for his arrival. though that would leave the need to deal with hades somehow….. maybe it’s his ‘pet’, and killing it traps hades for hiccup to deal with Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jwsponky Posted May 31, 2018 Author Report Share Posted May 31, 2018 5 minutes ago, Strange_idea said: that works, and after he leaves, megara-hades could start up a secondary project with the afterlife, a personal suite for his arrival. though that would leave the need to deal with hades somehow….. maybe it’s his ‘pet’, and killing it traps hades for hiccup to deal with That could work... Though my mind has seen fit to give me two more possibilities… 1. Hades has actually managed to pull off operation 'Takeover Olympus', as in the final act of the movie, but one of the goddesses escapes and asks Hiccup for help, something along the lines of "If you takeover Greece, you do NOT want Hades to be the one in charge of Olympus" 2. Hecate decides to have another go at taking over the Underworld, and tries to hire Hiccup as a mercenary. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Strange_idea Posted May 31, 2018 Report Share Posted May 31, 2018 hmmm… what if hiccup runs into the escaped goddess INSIDE the underworld? though that would leave the question of how he got there…. Those aren’t bad, but i do think hades should be the one to bring his downfall, as it suits him. to have a goddess get away doesn’t make much sense since he’s smart enough to at least look for her….. unless that’s how he meets her, she escapes the underworld and hade’s forces aren’t far behind, hiccup happens to save her and goes with her. megara, playing an escaped soul comes as a guide ( and spy for hades, against her will). She does what she can to steer them away from trouble, but cannot disobey hades. I don’t know what we’d do with hecate after if we brought her in is the only thing. hmm… what i we combined the ideas? after the escape above, hades is the one to appear, disguised as hecate, though with his trademark fast-talk and blue fire. he tells hiccup a version what happened, but blames the gods for uprising and throwing out their ruler (the god who escaped is cursed herc zeus reincarnated as femherc) under the command of hades, and asks him to go overthrow them and save the captive souls She offers her ‘preist' megara to accompany them and to look after girl herc while they’re gone, saying hades can’t be allowed to get his hands on them. She summons megara and forces her to lead hiccup to the gods and/or fallen heroes. actually, what if hiccup invites them into the tower to rest, and hades (not having planned this but good to adapt) takes advantage to steal the sorceresses (still disguised as hecate) and frames the gods for it. ‘Hecate’ offers takes over as mission control, opening the portal and sending him through with megara. His plan at that point could be to use the tower to drain the gods titles and powers to become supreme god, which backfires when they use it to channel his title and powers to meg. hiccup has to rescue them from the tortures hades put them through, giving them false hope and lulling them into security, but by sending them BACK hades captures them and starts draining them through the tower. herc wakes up just before hiccup leaves, and chooses to go after them to free the others… which hades allows because it gets him all his victims in one place and they have only one exit. not sure how it backfires yet, but the forgotten god could just be something he keeps in storage and is sending them to fight as ‘hades’ to clean up loose ends. all the while hercette and meg fall in love while working with hiccup, so she can be given hades power and maybe be the Hera figure. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Strange_idea Posted May 31, 2018 Report Share Posted May 31, 2018 meg probably doesn’t mean to take the power, just drain him or rip him to astral shreds. she kind of inverts the jester character by betraying and closing the portal, but FOR Hiccup. probably to kill Hades hades trapped the gods in the bodies of young girls as part of their punishment and when he’s drained me does the same to him for karmic justice, keeping her as a pet.. actually, maybe they reincarnated (like we said) and he kept them sealed there to prevent them escaping, and bringing in hercules happened to get hiccup’s attention. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jwsponky Posted May 31, 2018 Author Report Share Posted May 31, 2018 25 minutes ago, Strange_idea said: hmmm… what if hiccup runs into the escaped goddess INSIDE the underworld? though that would leave the question of how he got there…. Those aren’t bad, but i do think hades should be the one to bring his downfall, as it suits him. to have a goddess get away doesn’t make much sense since he’s smart enough to at least look for her….. unless that’s how he meets her, she escapes the underworld and hade’s forces aren’t far behind, hiccup happens to save her and goes with her. megara, playing an escaped soul comes as a guide ( and spy for hades, against her will). She does what she can to steer them away from trouble, but cannot disobey hades. I don’t know what we’d do with hecate after if we brought her in is the only thing. hmm… what i we combined the ideas? after the escape above, hades is the one to appear, disguised as hecate, though with his trademark fast-talk and blue fire. he tells hiccup a version what happened, but blames the gods for uprising and throwing out their ruler (the god who escaped is cursed herc zeus reincarnated as femherc) under the command of hades, and asks him to go overthrow them and save the captive souls She offers her ‘preist' megara to accompany them and to look after girl herc while they’re gone, saying hades can’t be allowed to get his hands on them. She summons megara and forces her to lead hiccup to the gods and/or fallen heroes. actually, what if hiccup invites them into the tower to rest, and hades (not having planned this but good to adapt) takes advantage to steal the sorceresses (still disguised as hecate) and frames the gods for it. ‘Hecate’ offers takes over as mission control, opening the portal and sending him through with megara. His plan at that point could be to use the tower to drain the gods titles and powers to become supreme god, which backfires when they use it to channel his title and powers to meg. hiccup has to rescue them from the tortures hades put them through, giving them false hope and lulling them into security, but by sending them BACK hades captures them and starts draining them through the tower. herc wakes up just before hiccup leaves, and chooses to go after them to free the others… which hades allows because it gets him all his victims in one place and they have only one exit. not sure how it backfires yet, but the forgotten god could just be something he keeps in storage and is sending them to fight as ‘hades’ to clean up loose ends. all the while hercette and meg fall in love while working with hiccup, so she can be given hades power and maybe be the Hera figure. 10 minutes ago, Strange_idea said: meg probably doesn’t mean to take the power, just drain him or rip him to astral shreds. she kind of inverts the jester character by betraying and closing the portal, but FOR Hiccup. probably to kill Hades hades trapped the gods in the bodies of young girls as part of their punishment and when he’s drained me does the same to him for karmic justice, keeping her as a pet.. actually, maybe they reincarnated (like we said) and he kept them sealed there to prevent them escaping, and bringing in hercules happened to get hiccup’s attention. These are possibilities, and I admit the only reason my second new idea included Hecate was because if I recall correctly she failed several times to overthrow Hades just like Hades fails to overthrow Zeus... though now that I think about it, isn't Hecate already kind of a female Hades, down to the grey skin, fire hair, and fast talking?.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Strange_idea Posted May 31, 2018 Report Share Posted May 31, 2018 it was worth considering, but we already had a villain. we could combine the characters maybe… maybe not Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jwsponky Posted May 31, 2018 Author Report Share Posted May 31, 2018 4 minutes ago, Strange_idea said: it was worth considering, but we already had a villain. we could combine the characters maybe… maybe not This is true. I have been struck by another idea, this one I admit might not be the best, but is somewhat amusing. What if Hiccup conquered 'mortal' Greece from the Glorious Empire, completely ignorant of the fact the Grecian gods actually exist, when Hades manages to conquer Olympus, possibly with the aid of the titans, but probably not since they are rather hard to not notice, and executes the other gods before they have a chance to escape or be freed, causing their powers to seek out 'worthy hosts' who just so happen to be the women Hiccup took as mistresses to oversee the regions of Greece, Cassandra, Helen, Tempest, and such, causing them to spontaneously manifest their godly powers in the Dark Tower, drawing a deadpan "Odd." from Hiccup? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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