She is the One

[Rescue25]

- First, no sex in this chapter. Again, it would feel out-of-place and I hate trying to force a sex scene into the story. I think I've realized, since moving here from xnxx, that I am writing not a 'sex story' but a story that happens to have sex in it, since it's a big part of the characters' lives. So this next chapter will be more story. Apologies if that annoys anyone but that's why I wanted to let you know beforehand.

OK no sex. I think many of us follow you for the story AND you writing skills.

B

Thanks a lot, Joe! You just made the Super Bowl anti-climatic.

Great observation.

B

[jc1138]

Thanks guys

[Guest anon111]

Joe do you hav e a twitter? If not u should make one

[Guest bill]

While it's probably not the case, it wouldn't surprise me to find out Jack's parents are siblings and had to move away from everyone they knew and loved and that's why the grandparents aren't mentioned.

Love all the speculation, especially the outlandish ones. We always need some comic relief to keep us sane.

[Guest bill]

While it's probably not the case, it wouldn't surprise me to find out Jack's parents are siblings and had to move away from everyone they knew and loved and that's why the grandparents aren't mentioned.

I dont think this is the case.

Why would the father even CONSIDER separating them if he is in a relationship with his sister?

[COJimmyV]

I dont think this is the case.

Why would the father even CONSIDER separating them if he is in a relationship with his sister?

Knowing the difficulties he had to go through, he doesn't want his kids to suffer the same fate. Like I said, it's probably NOT the case considering the way Joe has written the rest of the story but at this point, nothing would really surprise me.

[Guest Guest]

To be honest there are times I breeze through the sex scenes to continue following the plot. Story is that good

[Jashley13]

Chapter 24 is up (yaaaaaaay!)

I finished it at work tonight and was planning on posting it when I got up but, honestly, I didn't want to make you guys wait any longer. Hope you all enjoy!

I'm going to take a day or so off before I start Chapter 25 but I will do my best to get through that one quicker

Hope 24 was worth the wait. See you guys again soon!

[YNP_Refugee]

Good chapter.

I think one thing you did well was show that people see what they WANT to see. Dad sees a brother and sister that look too much alike. Jack sees a brother that looks just like dad and a sister that looks just like mom. I still say dad is responding to societal conditioning then explaining it away the best he can logically.

I can not wait to see what mess you are going to get Jack to get Craig into to make Becca take him out. lol

Edited February 1, 2015 by YNP_Refugee

[COJimmyV]

Interesting. Maybe it was just my frame of mind when I started reading but I found myself angry most of the time while reading this. Had my Dad ever screamed at me and threatened me like Jack's Dad did, I can promise you we'd have come to blows. I was also a little pissed at Becca there at the end. Blaming Jack for Craig's mood was way out of line, at least in my opinion.

I guess getting me all worked up and angry is the mark of a good writer. Well done, Joe!

[YNP_Refugee]

Interesting. Maybe it was just my frame of mind when I started reading but I found myself angry most of the time while reading this. Had my Dad ever screamed at me and threatened me like Jack's Dad did, I can promise you we'd have come to blows. I was also a little pissed at Becca there at the end. Blaming Jack for Craig's mood was way out of line, at least in my opinion.

I guess getting me all worked up and angry is the mark of a good writer. Well done, Joe!

I would agree with you. But my best revenge would have come when Joe asked why the separate rides. Imagine instead of making an excuse that will not prove useful tomorrow, just calling dad and telling him "this is on speaker because Joe, who is standing here, wants to know why the separate rides all of a sudden. We can talk about being 'subtle' when we are all home tonight." Depending on how dad responds you might be able to recover it without telling him the truth or resorting to black male, "I know your secret, you need to keep theirs." Either way dad would be rethinking what he is doing. And begin looking into being subtle. He might even realize that phone calls in hall ways with 50 other students playing pass the phone unwillingly is anything but subtle. It is bound to attract attention and start rumors. Especially in a high school where students can be vicious and look for ways to hurt other students.

Dad himself is doing more to make sure they get caught or end up having to explain things the kids have kept hidden for almost 3 years. It was only in dads face because for a little while, when they thought he might be cool with it. They know their school mates would not be.

Oh, and I do not believe for a second he just happened to walk into their room while they were doing that. He set out to trap them and knew when he made the deal he would.

By the way, do you know what federal authorities call it when you place a video camera in a room where a teen age girl or boy changes clothes and may sleep in the nude? They call that production of child pornography. It is about a 15 year sentence at the top end. If you did it to catch them having sex and succeed, it is a top end charge. Dad is running a con with this threat and would be told so by anyone who 'installs' cameras. Reputable installers would in fact refuse and report (they are required to by most states. To even attempt it is considered 'ongoing child abuse'). Please do not bring up nanny cams we are talking 14yos+ here, not 5yos who are being left in the care of strangers.

On last thing Jack and the twins are actually triplets... If jack is smart enough to pass a year ahead from the begining of the story then his siblings, I would assume, did not because they were otherwise occupied during the last two years. If they decide to apply themselves, most states have early graduation programs that will let the student do so. That would place them in college early. If they timed it right they could do so just as they turned 18 and having devoted that much time to one another, even if not having sex they would be even closer. It would limit their free time and be something they share, that on the surface dad would approve of. IE they would not be dating each other but not anyone else either. After all they are aiming at being able to move in together at 18 in a shared appt. in a state where they could just tell everyone that they are married is the reason for the last name being the same. If they are telling everyone they are married then that is a built in excuse not to date and to turn offers down. The main problem I would see with this would be the college admin but if they choose a city with two colleges and they each attend a different one then they would not have to fudge the administrations paperwork. San Fran., LA (west coast), Cambridge, and I think NY city on the east would all fit the bill. Each city has multiple colleges and/or universities with top level reputations.

If all four kids wanted to share expenses then the top Vet school in Ca at least is Davis in SF. I only know that because a friend of mine was on the waiting list to get in for like 5 years. I think that Kayla's Veterinary degree would be the hardest thing to accommodate.

Edited February 2, 2015 by YNP_Refugee

[Guest justaquestion]

Agree 100%. If my dad ever did something like that no way could I just walk a way, but I have a quick temper so. I also thought dads reason was gonna blow my mind because Joe said no one got it right, but I said it a while ago that dads problem was "simple" he just didn't agree with incest.

[Guest Bill]

Let's hear it for Becca. New resident badass. Red heads are usually very passionate people. She's in love with Craig and will do what she needs to do while protecting him. I know she doesn't think that Jack's comments were said intending to hurt Craig. She did warn Jack though, intentional or unintentional, the next time would bring an epic smack down. As far as no one guessing why Jack's dad was against the twins relationship, I now remember in Ch. 1 where Jack stated how the twins looked alike. Later on, after Jack found out about the relationship, Jack commented about how they would have trouble keeping a relationship from being judged even in college given the fact that they were so identical looking to each other. I like Jack's reasoning behind letting Alan and Amanda continuing their relationship and seeing how they handle it together. Parents cannot protect there children from all of the pain in the world. How we react to both pain and joy shape who we are as individuals. If Alan and Amanda really want this relationship, they are going to have to fight for it. I think this is what the next chapter is going to relate to.

[YNP_Refugee]

If Alan and Amanda really want this relationship, they are going to have to fight for it. I think this is what the next chapter is going to relate to.

I do not know about the next chapter but soon. If they do not stand up in one way or another whether it is a direct face down or a long term plan between them they have lost.

[Guest JohnnyBanana]

I think it's over. What nobody has commented on is that Jashley talked about writing into college. "(Which we'll get to)" But I think Double A is done. Mike is right. He's so undeniably right. I think Jack realizes this and now he's fighting a losing battle. I think something big swings Jack's opinion and he fully understands that this was all for the best. At least I hope that's what happens.

And seriously, Becca? You got some brass balls and I respect you greatly for it. Damn girl. Did Jashley just set himself up for a Becca saga or thinking on a grand scale, a side story about Becca? Is she actually batshit crazy? IS SHE THE ONE THAT PLANTS THE PIPE BOMB?

Oh and one last thing...can all these relationships really go the distance? Namely, Joe and Belle then Craig and Becca... I think both of these end. And at least one has to end in fireworks because it would be pretty weak to have them both be a "we just drifted apart...it was a mutual agreement to break up..."

I'm not saying this is coming soon...just saying it's gotta happen.

[Guest Bill]

Once again, a superb addition to an impressive piece of writing. I read this Sunday and didn't realize until later today that there was no sex in this chapter.

I didn't miss it and it detracted not one iota from the quality of the story.

Mr. Ashley, you have crafted a wonderful story and done a magnificent job presenting it.

On the thoughts of Mike regarding his declaration that the Alan/Amanda relationship is over, I have some reservations and observations. He stated his case quite well and quite logically. His argument sounds good and noble.

The failure I see is that as parents, we wish to spare our children the pain of life as much as we can but it is an impossible task to protect them from all of life's slings and arrows. And to some degree, it probably does them a disservice in that in protecting them from the pain in life, we make them less capable of standing on their own when they are adults.

A wise man said, "To protect men from their folly is to fill the world with fools."

I think his argument is well stated but fallacious to an extent. Alan and Amanda might be better served to have to endure the pain of potentially being discovered and would emerge from it either stronger or destroyed. There is perhaps some wisdom in the expression what doesn't kill us makes us stronger. And if they are to go through life as they are now, they will definitely need to be strong.

Bill

[YNP_Refugee]

I would disagree with the idea that it is probably over. Jashely stated he knew such a couple. My guess is he is patterning this relationship on that couple. This is supposed to be a saga or story arc that will carry 5 to 6 chapters. This was only the second.

Edited February 3, 2015 by YNP_Refugee

[Guest bashfulsbud]

Bashfulsbud

[Guest No_one]

Woo! Go Becca!

[COJimmyV]

Meh. As far as I'm concerned, Becca is talking out the side of her neck. Jack was already suffering when he told Craig. What Craig does with the info is all on him. Jack probably should have told her he understood she wanted to protect Craig but that she's full of shit. I'm also surprised Kayla didn't defend Jack and say, "Just try it sister" or something to that effect. Making stupid threats is a good way to end a would-be friendship.

[Jashley13]

Hey everyone!

Not an update-on-chapter post (just started) but more kind of a thinking one. About an hour ago I received a very angry message from a reader who claimed that they had posted a review of the story but could not see it anymore. Their immediate conclusion was that I had taken it down because it was less than kindly. They then proceeded to slice apart the story, bringing up how Jack was too perfect, stuff like this doesn't happen, incest is unnatural and immoral, the story has plateaued and become completely predictable, etc. etc. etc.

You guys know me; I'm never going to tell someone that their opinion is wrong, even if I disagree with it. But it got me thinking...the way I write is probably very, very different than how most people write. Not trying to set myself apart or anything, like I'm some sort of one-in-a-million gift or anything, but I am aware that I don't follow set 'rules' of writing. I remember, a few months ago, someone posted a comment basically telling me I had to follow the stringent outline of writing, i.e. exposition, rising action, etc.

This seems to tie into people who believe that the story has not flowed like most stories thus far. On the one hand, that's kind of what I'm going for. I loathe being tied down to rules of writing; I've never found that they help me. I recall in college (Jack will go through a similar experience), I was in a script-writing course and I decide to write my one-act play in a very different style than everyone else. The main criticism of it? It wasn't like everyone else's. The problem I had with that criticism? It failed to acknowledge the fact that everyone else's scripts were, basically, the exact same script, just with different character names.

Now, I don't mean this as a smack-down of other stories. Hell, even back on xnxx (which seemed to have a million of the same exact story) my favorite authors were the ones who broke boundaries and defied the rules. See, the 'outline' of a basic story doesn't fit into my story because I'm writing as a slice-of-life sort of tale, not a 'this is a story for the sake of a story'. Life doesn't follow a stringent outline of exposition, rising action, climax, etc. I'm aware that this is not how most writers write, but I take that as a compliment. I don't want to be like most writers. I want to be my own author with my own story.

And I've always been drawn to stories that defy the conventions of storytelling. Hell, look at anything Tarantino's ever made; he prides himself on flaunting basic 'writing rules'. My favorite film of last year, Boyhood, didn't follow any structure aside from the structure you'd have to find in a person's life. Hell, one of my favorite films of all time, Tree of Life, isn't a story in the general sense but an experience of lives and time and space. Does it have a story structure? Probably, but not in the basic, according-to-Hoyle sense.

Ramble, ramble, ramble, I think my point is that, if it seems like I'm making deviations from form, it's because I am. If I need to break rules in order to tell the story or to serve the characters, I will. I find it more honest and more believable, at least from my perspective. Do you have to feel the same way? Of course not. Trust me, I learn more from criticism than from praise (but I love praise too, if I can allow one moment of immodesty).

One last thing I noticed from the message: the author seemed to believe that Jack was 'too perfect' because he didn't cheat. In fact, I've noticed that almost every person who has ever called Jack 'too perfect' has basically demanded that he cheat because 'that's what teenagers do'. I was not perfect in high school and yet I had two girlfriends and I never once considered cheating on them. I'd like to think others have done the same.

Anyway, just thought I'd share a bit of my mind with all of you. If this has been too long, I apologize but I like to go at a topic like this in-depth, so you know that I'm taking it seriously. If you guys love the story, trust me, I am so very very grateful to you all. Every praise brings a smile to my face and every time I post, I pray that it lives up to your expectations. You are all the best audience an author like me could hope for...way more than I deserve. And I am working my hardest to stay worthy of your praise and attention.

So, in short...love you guys and I hope the next chapter is worth whatever wait you have to go through

[YNP_Refugee]

Sorry to hear you are having troubles with... well I would not say a fan in this case.

Kind of shows that they have no idea how the world works that they would think something you have to make rules against does not happen. Then rant on about it. Incest is as natural as sex. I will not speak to its morality but most religions would say it is immoral to have sex out side of marriage as well. It is done outside marriages every day. People tend to think the thing they want is ok, but the rules against the things they think are wrong are absolute and correct.

I have already stated I had a bought with incest at the age of 8. It lasted a couple of weeks then was more or less forgotten for almost 4 years till the old saying "loose lips sink ships" came into play and everyone in our class and our family found out it had happened. Yes, my aunt and I went to the same school through the 8th grade, two years after everyone found out. There were plenty of lips, we had used my sister and a younger cousin as look outs for our parents. There was all kinds of hell to pay after that. No I am not going into detail more now than last time beyond what I just said. Over the next couple of years it was again mostly forgotten.

By the time I entered high school I was looking for the 2.5 and white picket fence. So know it would never have occurred to me to cheat on a girl friend either. That having been said I have spent my life looking at the things I have done or that have happened to me and trying to figure them out.

Our society is not like most people think classified as a monogamous society (that classification is reserved for societies where most people have one mate in a life time. Read mate to mean a person one has sex with, it has nothing to do with marriage.) but as one of serial polygamy. Our divorce rates are above 60% and most people see 3 or even 4 marriages in their life times. They tend to have even more mates, ie people they have had sex with.

I never got the 2.5 or the white picket fence. I still try to figure out what went wrong. I am in contact with more than half the girls, women, I have known since the 2nd grade, on facebook at least. I have been told I could have had any of them at one point or another, sometimes clean up to the day they married. They all say they would like to see me married and raising kids of my own, knowing this is my dream. Truth is you can forget the 2.5... I wanted as many as I could get away with. 2.5 is just the average that happens in our society. I love kids, having raised three that are not my own, I think I have a good idea about the process.

Edited February 3, 2015 by YNP_Refugee

[Rescue25]

You are the one many of us are following. Not someones idea. If someone doesn't like where you are taking this story then they have theprivilege of not reading it. If they can do better let them author their own missive. There are many of us that like what and how you do. PLEASE continue to march to YOUR drummer.

B

Edited February 4, 2015 by Rescue25

[Guest JohnnyBanana]

Jashley I'm going to keep this short and sweet so you and everybody knows exactly where I stand.

The aforementioned ass who sent that message can fuck off. Oh, and as I finish high school, I have never, not one time had anything close to the thought of cheating.

[COJimmyV]

These stories are a form of escape for most of us. This is your story and you have every right to write it how you want. It really is as simple as that. The ONLY formula you need to follow is the one in your head.

Being OUR escape, we naturally have a vested interest in where the story leads and we all have opinions on what we'd like to see. We may like or dislike turns the story takes but that parallels life. Bitching about the paths you take is going to happen but they need to remember the bottom line. It's YOUR story, Joe and if they don't like it, they can go read something else.