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She is the One


GEMINI

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Speaking of theories: As Joe will become an outcast considering what he did, he may build and set off the pipe bomb to get some attention.

I don't see Joe with any place to hide, anyone to offer support.

Joe is certainly capable of building a bomb-- as I mentioned a while back-- but would he? I think that Belle, Jack and the rest of the group would simply stop speaking to him. The rest of his classmates might not be so benign and some could actively persecute him. Add to that the heavy guilt that his father will lay on him and, yeah, he could be pushed over the edge.

I've been thinking about who might possibly support Joe through the shit-storm that is to come. Maybe Tara? Joe used to have a crush on her and it's possible that she might have sympathy for him. Tara is probably still feeling like a bit of an outsider at her new school. She is reluctant to get a boyfriend possibly due to weird feelings about the threesome last summer. Since Joe will soon be persona non grata maybe the two of them will connect?

No Tara wont.but Jessica might use Joe for her mission to get jack.and she may convince him for pipe bomb etc etc

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No Tara wont.but Jessica might use Joe for her mission to get jack.and she may convince him for pipe bomb etc etc

Okay, possible. Even though Joe could build the pipe bomb, I still have trouble believing he will. I think that whoever is responsible for the bomb will be directly connected to the prostitution ring. You are right in thinking that Joe could easily fall under Jessica's influence. Once he is outcast he will latch onto anyone who shows him sympathy.

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The next chapter is nearing the end but there's a few big plot points I still have to hit and I can't just hit them without proper context and atmosphere so I will hopefully have it up by this weekend.

This^

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Joe,

After re-reading the last chapter, I believe I may have come across a minor discrepancy in the storyline.

The first scene of Chapter 42 has Alan and Jack discussing their plans for the evening. Alan says, "Sam and Helena's mom is taking them out to Perry's" (I'm assuming that's a restaurant).

As near as I can recall, the only other time that Sam's mom has been mentioned was in Chapter 27 when Amanda brought Sam home for dinner. Mike Harrison asked Sam, "So what does your mom do?" and Sam replied, "She's gone" and, "She...just left." (I took that to mean that Mrs. O'Dell had simply abandoned her family, as Sam didn't mention divorce.)

Did you perhaps intend for Alan to say, "Sam and Helena's dad is taking them out to Perry's"? That would reconcile Chapters 27 and 42.

I'm eagerly anticipating 43!

Edited by Chester57
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Joe,

After re-reading the last chapter, I believe I may have come across a minor discrepancy in the storyline.

The first scene of Chapter 42 has Alan and Jack discussing their plans for the evening. Alan says, "Sam and Helena's mom is taking them out to Perry's" (I'm assuming that's a restaurant).

As near as I can recall, the only other time that Sam's mom has been mentioned was in Chapter 27 when Amanda brought Sam home for dinner. Mike Harrison asked Sam, "So what does your mom do?" and Sam replied, "She's gone" and, "She...just left." (I took that to mean that Mrs. O'Dell had simply abandoned her family, as Sam didn't mention divorce.)

Did you perhaps intend for Alan to say, "Sam and Helena's dad is taking them out to Perry's"? That would reconcile Chapters 27 and 42.

I'm eagerly anticipating 43!

LOl man just ignore such things,he is a human,so much things going thruogh his mind when writing such story and so many characters and plots and what not

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Hey everyone! Chapter 43 is up!

First of all, thank you Chester57 for noticing that discrepency. Don't know how that slipped past me, but it's been fixed.

Second, sorry this one took a little longer but it just drained me. Every time I wrote it, I had to stop every few pages and just take a breath. Yeah, this was another emotionally taxing chapter. Hopefully that doesn't sacrifice quality.

Sorry for the lack of updates but, in addition to being emotionally drained, I've also been physically drained. I've been working more to save money for the holidays so I've been having less time to sleep and...well, in addition to the emotional drain, I've been feeling twice my age. Ugh. Still, I've been perservering through it, though I may take a couple of days off before starting the next chapter.

Hope you're all well, hope you all had a good Halloween, and I'll see you all in the next chapter! :)

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Well... That was... Traumatic

Great chapter, but 'emotional rollercoaster' doesn't do it justice.

So many possibilities as to what could happen next.

SPOILERS:

So on one side, we have jack, Kayla,Tara, Helena,Alan, Amanda. And the other (sort of, really just everyone that is with jack) Craig, Becca, belle, Joe, Sam. (Sort of skim read a few of the longer paragraphs so if I missed something my apologies)

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*soilers*

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Well. I, Hmm. Jack and Kayla vs the world huh? Looks like things have not only gone to shit, but beyond shit. Friend group gone, people very angry with him, man, the road ahead is not smooth. That really sucks. Belle was one of my favorite characters. I hope she doesn't do anything stupid. Maybe she joins LAJAK (The League Agaisnt Jack And Kayla, in case you were wondering.) As Jack makes friends, he seems to make the same amount of enemies.

I have a monster headache right now, so that's all I have to offer. I'll sleep on it and see what I think. Does everyone have headaches? Maybe this is a trend.

Oh, there were some parts I found quite funny.

Edited by thismy
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Guest That guy over there

So Joe....... I've been reading this story for... yeah, wow, over a year now, quietly lurking in this forum (Tara is definitely a walrus by the way), and this chapter,.... just.... damn man. I've never seen anyone able to realistically describe how I feel on my bad days (currently dealing with depression) and it's almost cathartic to read Jack's thoughts. A couple of the chapters have been tough reads because they hit close to home for me as well, but this one takes the cake. Thanks for writing such an amazing story and I can't wait for the next chapter!

I should probably make an account now....

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Well... That was... Traumatic

So on one side, we have jack, Kayla,Tara, Helena,Alan, Amanda. And the other (sort of, really just everyone that is with jack) Craig, Becca, belle, Joe, Sam. (Sort of skim read a few of the longer paragraphs so if I missed something my apologies)

Out of 5 couples, Joe and Sam excused themselves, while Jack managed to drive away Belle, Becca and Craig.

So there's the three Harrison sibs (Jack, Alan and Amanda), Kayla, Tara, Kelly, Helena and Rhona

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I have a monster headache right now, so that's all I have to offer. I'll sleep on it and see what I think. Does everyone have headaches? Maybe this is a trend.

With Kayla saying to Jack, "Maybe you caught what Amanda has", perhaps that was the author's hint that Amanda wasn't pregnant! (I so wished it was true)

BTW, Amanda stayed home sick on Monday, then Jack narrated a lot and things skipped to the end of the week - but there was never any mention of when and if Amanda ever got back to school.

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I'm just envisioning how tumblr would explode with the feels if this actually gets published.

It's sort-of published, it's on the internetz if you know where to look.

I was talking to my friend at work who had on the t-shirt for the school Brow Ridge is based on, and confessed to him I'd been reading and writing adult fiction. He wanted to see it, and I told him to Google "jashley13". He clicked the link and it popped up to chapter 1, which he scanned over while muttering, "interesting". I was wondering if his opinion of me might have changed (although he's no stick in the mud) but afterwards I realized it didn't ask him to give his birthdate and signature to access the story. AFAIK that only happens if he was auto logged in, IOW, had already been a reader of the site!

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More spoilers should just read 43 instead of forums.

There are plenty of realationship in this chapter going so many way I'll just stick with one. I feel jack is perfectly justified blowing up at Craig. Jack lost his best friend and watched his sisters heart get broken at this party that creig won't stop talking about and glorifying. Maybe he didn't need to be as harsh as he was but creig was being a bad friend already talking about it when he knew how jack felt. Craig talks as if the party was like the best thing ever where to jack the party is probably one of the worst because of what happened.

I don't wanna see Kayla hurt but I feel the next chapter she's going to be on the warpath for Becca. They have had this conversation before and now that Becca has accually attacked jack I'm sure Kayla will be less then pleased and retaliate. Which would probably leave a friendship between the couples impossible if it isn't already.

And poor belle I hope she can work something out with jack and Kayla she is one of the characters I like the most and I want things to work out for her.

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I feel jack is perfectly justified blowing up at Craig. Jack lost his best friend and watched his sisters heart get broken at this party that creig won't stop talking about and glorifying.

Craig was being a self-centered dick. There were shattered relationships and friendships all around, and Craig was gleeful that he might come out of the mess better liked by the masses.

I still think Rhona is really crushing on Jack, pushing the boundaries, and I also get this vibe that Helena has an interest in Amanda.

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Craig was being a self-centered dick. There were shattered relationships and friendships all around, and Craig was gleeful that he might come out of the mess better liked by the masses.

I still think Rhona is really crushing on Jack, pushing the boundaries, and I also get this vibe that Helena has an interest in Amanda.

Didn't pick up on that originally but now that you mention it, it is there as a possablity. So Is Shannon after asking Jack if Amanda liked her Edited by that-one-guy
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Didn't pick up on that originally but now that you mention it, it is there as a possablity. So Is Shannon after asking Jack if Amanda liked her

I agree. Binyam demurs when Jack inquires why he won't asked Shannon out. Quite possibly Binyam doesn't want to be the one advertising that Shannon plays for the other team, and Shannon does seem to show a lot of interest in Kayla.

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Guest TasDave

Am I the only one wondering if Jack's views on Catcher in the Rye is a reflection on how he's acting at the moment?

I found reading this chapter quite arduous, not because it was written poorly, but more because I had little empathy for Jack during this. Sounds harsh I know, but Jack has been pretty selfish lately. Not outwardly, more inwardly in that whenever something happens to his friends his mind heads towards "oh not my friendship group I can't lose that!" or something to that effect. Like his inability to even grasp the concept that sometimes couples break up simply because they aren't in love or interested anymore.

His views seem to be more about maintaining his own view on how his family and friends should be relative to him and does/thinks of ways to oppose any change that might mean he has to adjust.

I realise he's a teenager and meant to be a bit selfish but I'm just feeling a bit more like "well what did you expect would happen idiot" towards him lately.

I could be way off base but just my thoughts.

Also what did Jack expect when he went to see Becca? I hope Kayla puts her in her place, and to tell Jack to not be such a limp dick (not as in hit Becca, more of an in general). Not to mention someone needed to give Craig a reality check anyway.

I'm wondering when Rhona tries it on with Jack as it seems to be building to that.

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His views seem to be more about maintaining his own view on how his family and friends should be relative to him and does/thinks of ways to oppose any change that might mean he has to adjust.

I realise he's a teenager and meant to be a bit selfish but I'm just feeling a bit more like "well what did you expect would happen idiot" towards him lately.

Second paragraph: "The world was cracking. I wasn't ready for it to break yet."

Jack had his comfort zone. There were the issues with the three-way at the cabin, but for most of his life Jack had people and relationships, structures, that he could rely on. Suddenly those are all gone, and he sees himself to blame.

Part of our journeys as readers is observing him learn these lessons of life.

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