Strange_idea

Maybe the empire uses orcos?

Nono, i like tge orcs, as i said. They could go well with fairy hollow.

They get their own story with bats. Haven't written it up yet. Though there are some villaims that could have similar MOs. Kitten, the daughter of a geneticist, for example. Though that would male thenimprinting a bit of a stretch..... or not. Or i could make a seuqel with the biologist aspect. Thank you

I'd reccome you write a list. Or a flowchart, then list the girls and kingdoms into which game-adaption they go into. Help decise hiw to trim, combine or stretch events.

I'm trying to think of ways to group events to let you get away with them all. Streamline while keeping as much in as possible

I'd suggest dividing the story into gamez to as 'books'. Book 1 the first game, book 2 as rasing hell. I'd suggest book 3 as a reverse dark tales were hiccup prevents the war between the vikings and dragons and discovers who he once was, and book 4 as overlord 2.

Thank you

Excuse me thebooblover, is there a beta reader syatrm in the main site?

Sorry, just wanted to bring some attention to this story. I think it has real potential. And looks good so far

Theres a outline of the original idea at the first page. The stuff we told you geys added to that.

Still, it's important to understand the order of things for good construction and foreshadowing and character growth. And erotic tension

Oh, also hiccup's harem becomes his reigonal queens and maybe has a teleport netework with each other, letting more character stuff happen as he travels with the new girls. That bit's still undecided to a degree, if i understand. Is that my fault? Sorry. Just trying to help

No. Getting events in order first

Oh mirage, forgot mirage. She was sent by queen la as a proxy to die instead, but it didn't take so she stuck as hiccups loyal cat for a while. She hates la obviously

Sorry. Connection dropped out for a bit. Basically, insread of gnarl, the tladvisor is evil sorceresses sacrificed to power the tower. They raiaed hiccup and watch his advwnture while bound to the tower

If you feels i’m taking over or talking too much at any point let me know

drawing it out proper increases anticipation, we can have fans of the specific girls eagerly waiting for their chapter

besides, a fivesome off the bat might be too much anyway. I think the bets and ‘one every victory’ works pretty well

i know, but when you have more, you can work with more. cutting back’s fine, but you don’t have to. if you go with sublots and tie things together you can make a more complex, intricate but still coherent and interesting story. I think anyway

booblover says they’re on the way

okay.. that works, though there may need to be some fun with the rules here to prevent too many girls off the bat. maybe she’s part of the relay system, or guarding a different tower, or a servant to ursula. which brings up another topic i wanted to mention. I appreciate the ‘make him a man’ plan, but do you really want to colloquially play so many cards right away? it might be too much too soon. i understand the plan, but maybe space it out a bit. have one reward him for every territory captured, even if he doesn’t get so many girls in the first one. and since they’re his mothers, maybe they could take a stranger disguise shape (or maybe just human, non sorceress form) so he doesn’t see the pattern right away. still your story, your rules, i just wanted to put it out there. ….. actually they could use morganna for the first night and place bets to decide who gets him next. they could become human again after the overlord drains them, at which point it hits hiccup what they did

the write-out got very confused, so i understand though. sorry

it’s a reflex. i have poor social instincts so i guees conservatively on how i’m recieved. basically, my ide was as they take on the underworld and uncover goddess, probably by recusing them, they send them to safety in the tower. the tower that hecate aka hades, is guarding and running the portal too. he is naturally, ambushing them no the other side and draining them of their power and titles using the tower. had a thought on how to twist, hiccup getting trapped in hell too.

and by don’t need to follow the myths too closely, i mean be pragmatic, but nods to the orignal can be an apology for not getting stuff right. disney hercules did the same thing. neat bit of trivia, did you know they got permission to write a new ending for the little mermaid from the author’s surviving family?

That works, and she was very big on justice. I also considered artemis I’m not sure if her mother is still alive, but becoming goddess of vengeance/justice might make her queen by default. forgive me if my 'send them through the portal’ idea seems to take them out of the picture, this just seemed a good time to flesh out the ghouls as it were. that said, tempest would probably stick around for a while and gather some more, possibly then escorting them back while the hiccup, meg and company go to confront the fake hades