Whaaaaahaha! I'm such an idiot! I had this big, long reply and lost it when I left the page to look at something without copying first. I even know better! This edit box says it auto saves at the bottom, but I don't know how to retrieve it. So, since I reread my reply a few times (I'd make a good beta cause I review my own writing obsessively), I might be able to piece it back together. First, I'ma gettin' a big glass of Dr. Pepper ... *shuffles out to the kitchen*, *makes a pouring sound*, *skips back to the computer*, *writes the previous passage*, *copies said passage*, *continues with post ... note: tone change*
I don't want to even mention your crappy work situation, adding insult to injury in that baby-makin' factory.
It must be awful to lose 2 unborn babies. I like the term "angel babies", never heard it before. I chose to "lose" a baby when I was 17 and have thought about *him* ever since. I have an 11 yr old now, but I still wonder "what if"? I think it's much worse if you don't have a choice in the matter. I'm afraid I don't relate to your situation, though, as I got preggers by a sneeze with both, even though I only carried one full term. But if you want to be a mom, I wish you all the luck I can gather. I would survive all right if I wasn't a mom, actually didn't want to be one for about 15 years, but I'm glad I am, now that I can see it from this side. BTW, one of my sisters adopted 2 before becoming pregnant and having a C-section. Strange influences. Motherly hormones. Who knows? *copy*
I'm glad you made a decision on your cousin's ass. Some people just need a swift kick to get goin', some more than others. It doesn't mean their life will improve, but really, not your problem. My other sister, for instance, is 50 yrs old, living in a trailer park on government assistance and whines and complains about her wretched existence. I, on the other hand, am 4 years younger, raised in the same family, and am working full time, paying a mortgage, raising an ADHD boy by myself having no contact or help from his father. Still, I manage to cope. Why? Beats me! My point here is that I can't make her have a better life and she's my frickin' sister. I won't be held responsible, and frankly, never felt that way. *copy*
As for mothering a 17 yr old with a bag full of baggy baggage, who would want that? Especially not your kid! My mom never liked any kids but her own, couldn't be bothered to coo over someone else's brat. It's easy to feel motherly toward a good kid, but you better have carried the tit-biter for 9 months, and dragged the little tantrum drummer boy through his development, to feel motherly toward a difficult boy. Thats where I'm comin' from. *copy*
As for Stoopid Reviewers: again, I can't relate. I've only had 3 reviewers. The first two were short and sweet. Nothing wrong with that. The second, I could wax poetic about. She leaves long, animated reviews for every chapter, and is my inspiration to keep writing. We actually review each other and it's the best experience I could have had on my first story! I'd lend her to you but I wants to keep my precious. I'm a pretty prolific reviewer, myself, and have been known to whine about lack of updates. But I think I had a leg to stand on. 1 year, 2 years, 4 years! C'mon, somebody had to say something! Although, I make sure to heap mucho compliments on the author in hopes of inspiring an update. *copy*
Now that I've read your experience, I have more compassion for the authors in question and will think twice before getting impatient next time. I was strictly on the reviewers side of the update battlefield, because I'm a selfish reader and always want more of a good thing. Thanks for giving me a soft kick, I think it will work. *copy*