BronxWench

I want to wish a very Happy Birthday to the amazing Melrick! If it were possible, I’d send you a Key Lime pie from JG Melon’s, but you’ll have to settle for a virtual hug.
 

THIS is why I have no faith in Reverse Dictionary. Granted, I suck at summarizing phrases and that doesn’t help the AI anyway, but its best guess for “Someone who has had wrong done to them” is VIRGIN?!

...I can’t. I just can’t even.

Excerpt from A New Lease on Life – 61: Forgiveness is for the Victimized (WIP)
 
Sometimes when I read back over what I’ve written, it feels like I just vomited up words on a page, swept it into a pile, and called it good. Other times, like this, I wonder if I carved them out of my chest and walked away without realizing a piece of my heart was missing.  All I meant to do was get into the groove of the chapter and I stabbed myself right in the feels.
 
*From a WIP/rough draft, no checking done yet – expect mis-comma-ing all over the place and maybe a spelling/grammar error or two.)

Wishing the very happiest of birthdays to my dear Pittwitch. Love you!
   

Wishing the very happiest of birthdays to my dear Pittwitch. Love you!
   

Wishing the very happiest of birthdays to my dear Pittwitch. Love you!
   

Wishing the very happiest of birthdays to my dear Pittwitch. Love you!
   

Ten ways you'll explain to your grandkids all those pictures of you in a face mask.
1. "This was right before I fought Goro in the semifinals."
2. "Unfortunately, our Kickstarter campaign for M*A*S*H: The Musical only collected a dollar eighty-nine."
3. “Yeah, your gramma really loved it when I’d put on this mask and- You know what, never mind.”
4. “They used to make all the ugly kids wear these. I hope puberty is kinder to you than it was to me.”
5. "...an' I did it all with nothin' but my horse, my pearl-handled six-shooter, an' that there mask."
6. “I could teach you, but be warned: The way of the shinobi is not an easy one.”
7. “On the up side, I got paid five hundred dollars for being on When Rhinoplasties Go Wrong.”
8. “This was long before you could just buy a kit to make meth.”
9. “Safe sex made one hell of a comeback in the 2020s.”
10. “I tell you, the very last thing you want when you’re fighting zombies is to smash one in the head and get splatter in your mouth.”

As of 1 hour 18 minutes ago, I am officially 34 years old.
Time for the annual bout of freaking out about all the things I haven’t done in my life!

*Thoughtfully chewing and swallowing*
“Right, right… I meant to order Feta cheese not futa cheese.”

I had to go to the post office yesterday. It was surprisingly busy, and it wasn’t easy to keep six feet away from everyone (although there were lines of tape on the floor for the folks standing in line). Ahead of me in line, a white man and a Latina woman got into an argument about one of them (I wasn’t sure who) cutting in front of them, and the guy told the woman to “go back to Mexico.” (Never mind that she spoke with an American accent.) Just overhearing that made me feel awful for the next hour. 

Grammarly had a blonde moment. Grammarly identified “blonde” as two different incorrectly spelled words somehow jammed together. 
This is why you always, always, ALWAYS either do your own proof-reading or have a beta proof-read your drafts instead of just running them through spellcheck and accepting all corrections. Grammarly’s free checker is, so far, the best I’ve come across, but it works best in combination with proof-reading. No checking program can replace proofreading.

I haven’t been on AFF in a while, but I just posted a review, and I realized I can’t read anyone else’s reviews. Are we not allowed to read story reviews anymore?

The difference between this site’s forums and FFnet’s forums is...uh...what’s a good solid word for “incredible?” There’s no doubt which of the two is better.
FFnet forums are plagued with simple, honest, non-aggressive questions which are subject to aggressive dogpiling, bullying, retributive reporting, and immaturity from users who don’t comprehend that you can disagree with someone without that disagreement making them a horribly nasty and evil person AND without being an utter dickbag about it. I’ve seen questions about site functions and guidelines turn into cyber-bullying sessions that have made people log off for weeks to recover; many of these times, I’ve given up on getting my answer to track the bullied user down and reassure them only to find out they were brought to tears and considering deleting their accounts entirely. The immaturity and bullying on that site is appalling, and even more so that it’s allowed to continue without repercussions. 
AFF forums? I’m looking for a thread to get answers from; instead, I just found a topic titled “Uses for a pet demon” and sprayed hot tea out my nose. No attacks in the replies, just people having fun with the idea and being – GASP! – rational human beings! Even more, users replying are – if you can believe it – JOKING about it! I feel like a kid who heard “Detention” but instead wound up at Disney World for the week. Plus, I can say someone’s being a dickbag without being reported for profanity, and I can write “this hit me hard” without the censors leaving only “me hard.” That's always awkward.
I love this site, and I love its users. Y’all are awesome. If only the site was easier to navigate and use on my tablet and if only it had better log-in security, I’d love it twice as much. Either way, it’ll be a while before I bother with FFnet’s forums again.
Now I just need to find a thread for language research & resources...

So, yeah. My dog died. So sad :(

That awkward moment when you realise you’re lusting after your professor…. One would think I’d outgrown this at my age… for feck’s sake 

Feeling kind of bummed about my legit writing right now. 
25 rejections (and counting) from agents regarding my first book. Stuck on my second book. No good ideas for my third book.  Why is legit writing so much harder than smut?

good news everyone! my sisters babys heart is fine! plus i know the sex of the baby but i cant tell anyone yet! shes having a gender reveal next weekend! AAAHHHHH still got 4 days off a week! hope the hours pick up soon. 

Okay, folks, here we go.  Deep breath...Chapter 9 of The Woman in the Statue is coming soon.  And by soon I mean I’m hoping for Wednesday.
Bear in mind that, as I’ve been writing it, I’ve decided that the finale is going to be two parts, so the actual end of the story will be Chapter 10.  All titles in the chapter index have been updated to reflect this (Part x of 10, in other words).
 
Now let’s all hope I don’t screw this up.

I may diss my phone a lot, but I was very impressed a while back when I started dictating the final chapter of "Country Summer." Not only did it use a colon where I wanted it to --  instead of just writing the word "colon" -- but it put the chapter title in proper title case ("Chapter 11: Under the Stars"). You go, Google.

If stray cats were hot girls, my life would be a harem anime.

gosh, i cant believe i am 35 now. scary! lol 

::runs through, screeching like a pterodactyl on a bender, wearing a sparkly tutu and dragon wings….::  

Forum activity notification “ TheBossMan started following Naruto “ and I just thought fuck me, these wrestling PPVs are getting out of hand.

Happy New Year, everyone. Let’s hope this one is fantastic.