BronxWench
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Posts posted by BronxWench
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pittwitch: Thank you!
I was dancing fast to get Yule in there! -
Your welcome. : )
I love stories that focus more on emotions rather than just jumping right into the action. Though I have never played the game, I will definitely go back and read the rest of the story, and continue to follow it!
You know what? That's probably the biggest compliment and best praise anyone could ask for, so thank you again! You've made my day!
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Fairy Slayer: Thank you so much for the review!
Yes, I am such a geek when it comes to the lore and background stuff, but it makes it easier to write in a world when I understand it thoroughly. I'm especially glad that the bits of elvish aren't too jarring, since it seems Wraith would certainly think in what little elvish he knows. Alistair is sort of opening up a bit, but I'm not quite sure he's going to be ready for Wraith... 
But these two will be back! -
Gah, this was too cute for words. So freaking sweet and adorable. I swear, even stoic, brooding Wraith is just bloody *cute* with the way he fidgets and then lets Alistair hold his hand. The tidbits of lore were awesome, especially since you can just feel the characters telling you their stories. It's a lot of lore and it really doesn't come off as exposition. The gesture at the end is very nice, but I would give you a little concrit there. We don't know how much time has passed between Ostagar and the Circle Tower, so the sudden breach of personal space (especially between a shy Chantry boy and a Dalish male) might be completely justified... but we're not seeing it there in the story. Of course, FlashFic are bitches because you have to stay under the word limit, but an introductory paragraph that sheds some light on how their relationship has evolved throughout this time would have been a nice touch. It's obviously nothing huge, I'm just saying this because I know you're like me
with the concrit. It's really the only thing that stands out.<br />
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The rest is just warm, fuzzy goodness. Which makes me seethe with envy, lol. I am honestly squirming in my seat to read the next instalment. Yikes, these two are amazing. You truly write them well.
First of all, thank you!
They are pretty sweet, but I blame it all on Alistair's influence. 
But you hit squarely on what was bugging me with this fic. The time lapse isn't clear when you're hopping from flash fic to flash fic like I'm doing, and it's hard to squeeze enough backstory in to make the progression of their relationship make sense. I think, depending on the next prompt, I can either make it clearer or somehow get enough backstory in there to make it more logical, and therefore believable. I get lost in other descriptions...
and then I forget that not everyone is actually living inside my head with me! (Gods, I hope not -- it's a mess in here!)But I do like this pair, and I will be writing more of them!
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Techno-Ninja: Thank you! This series is supposed to be more about the emotion, so I'm glad it's coming through. Things will heat up... soon!
Apollo: Thank you! The Chantry boy is a little slow to get going, but once he warms up, oh, yes! And of course I had to slip the elf geekdom in there somewhere!
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Pen Name: BronxWench
Story Link: Story: Yule
Review Replies: Review Replies - AFF Prompt/Yule - AFF Community Forums
Type of Fic: FlashFic
Rating: Adult
Fandom: Dragon Age: Origins
Pairing: N/A
Warnings: AFFO, ChallengeFic, Complete, NoSex
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pittwitch: You got yourself some competition, woman!
The wyvern is very fun to write because he's such a deadpan snarker. I wish I could keep him around longer!Heh, well, I guess I ain't as bad as I thought with the mushy stuff, lol.
*ponders* Auran executes his master plan and pounces Jeddek or Jeddek has enough and finally pounces Auran? Gods, it's so sad I can't have it both ways...
You know, I don't think I could choose, either!
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JayDee: Ah, yes... romance is germinating, at the very least! I'm glad you liked Alistair's reaction. I'm finding him surprisingly fun to write, and there will be more of these two.
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In the holiday spirit...
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Poor Jeddek isn't going to know what hit hit when Auran decides to pounce, I think...
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I love this... five spammers spleens! Brilliant!
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This is all I got. But again it's the 5 cock rings and it included the kilt and leaf blower
You are the boss. I bow to you Bronx Wench!
On the twelfth day of Christmas,
My true love gave to me,
Twelve blondes a bonking,
Eleven kilts a blowing,
Ten readers wanking,
Nine handcuffed slaves,
Eight maids a screwing,
Seven whips a failing,
Six guys a stripping,
Five cock rings!
Four naked ladies,
Three sexy men,
Two plump breasts,
And one hell-of-an amazing shag!
Oh, I love this! I'm telling you, we are a creative bunch, aren't we? :clap:
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On the twelfth day of Christmas,
my true love gave to me
Twelve horny cookies,
Eleven whips a-cracking,
Ten lords a-cumming,
Nine ladies stripping,
Eight maids a-spanking,
Seven hot men in kilts,
Six big leaf blowers,
Five cock rings,
Four paladins,
Three French maids,
Two cattle prods,
And a climax 'neath a pear tree!
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You can't take what the Japanese create in their media as their true views. The shows they watch and the stuff they read are like outlets since they can't display those types of urges IRL. A lot of the other shows they have have the actors displaying emotions that are so over-the-top as to be ridiculous because it's an outlet. They're soo conservative, a MARRIED COUPLE holding hands is considered too much PDA. In RL none of that is acceptable.
This is so true, AB. I dealt with a lot of Japanese clients, and the protocols and almost ritualistic behaviors involved in the simplest phone call can be extraordinary. Japanese media is so far removed from reality as to be almost from another planet, but it IS the only outlet they have. My mother's cousin married a Japanese man, and he was disowned at his mother's insistence. She would not have a son who was married to a gaijin, period. This would be the same woman who paid for a condo in Tokyo for her husband's mistress, by the way. There is a schizophrenia in that culture that is staggering to the Western mind...
Also, the "asshole exterior, mushy interior" makes me LAUGH whenever I see someone gushing about it. It's such a typical female fantasy. No wonder it works so well as a façade IRL. I really hope that you girls don't complain about unrealistic depictions of women in the media...
SK: That's a rant for another thread, another time...
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Good point, but my take on it is that it works because women are raised to think that way. I would very much like to interview a woman who has been raised in a radically different culture and see if it really does work on her. My prediction would be that culture dictates what people should look for in a sexual partner. If she was raised in a culture where subservience and meekness in males was a very desirable trait, and she had had no exposure to current Western culture, I would say that her body would NOT react sexually in the slightest to a man displaying asshole traits.
But this is all speculation, of course, unlikely that with today's globalization we'll ever find out the truth. It's just interesting food for thought.
One thing you don't cover is timeframe. I came of age, sexually speaking, in the early 70s, when sex was not yet lethal, and the worst thing that could happen could be cured by a few days of penicillin. Women in my age group, who were open to exploration, probably displayed more than a few asshole traits of their own. It didn't make me less likely to be drawn to the bad boys, but I certainly gave them a run for their money...
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I was reading this, and noticed something rather interesting, and let me state in advance that I'm poking myself more than anyone else...
Why is it that we automatically assume, when we discuss assholes, douchebags and arrogant twits, that we are referring to males? I do acknowledge that there is an inherent gender bias in the English language, with the male pronoun being the default, but dear gods... As a woman, I can categorically state that we are equally prone to all of the personality traits that go into being a total and utter feckwit. And honestly, I really don't know if I'm mentioning this from a sense of offended gender pride (Yes, we too are assholes!) or simply because I am having a nice moment of my own...
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So nice guys can't be anything but boring? That's a sad thing to think.
Sometimes nice guys are boring, until you hit them with something that pushes them past their limits. No one's ever nice all the time. Everyone has triggers, and if you can realistically portray how they react to those, nice guys can be a hell of a lot of fun to write.
Having said that, I prefer a little edge to my male characters. I find snark incredibly sexy, and a battle of wits amuses the hells out of me. I don't like men that are doormats, and I can't write men that are doormats, unless they are slated to die horribly in the very near future. But total bastards amuse me even less, unless I'm allowed to use them for target practice. Honestly, it's even harder to make a complete gobshite's redemption believable than it is to write a nice guy with limits.
But that's just me...
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pittwitch: Thank you! This was a fun prompt for me, and I'm glad you enjoyed my take on it!
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FairySlayer: Thank you! You have no idea how much I love having people who normally wouldn't dip into my fandom actually read my flash fics, and enjoy them! I really am trying to focus more on the characters than the storyline itself, and I want to give a little insight into Wraith's head, outsider that he feels he is.
Tolerance there is, along with a deepening friendship, and it is the best gift of all!
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ApolloImperium: I'm glad the underlying theme came through, even though this one was a bit more heavily into the fandom. I'm trying to keep these more about the characters and less about the actual game, and it's a fine line! But I'm glad you enjoyed it!
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Hah, the struggle not to get sucked in is half the fun!
Excellent point! I can't wait until Wraith tells him his real name (if he ever does!). Or if Wraith will whisper sweet nothings in Elvish to Alistair while they're in bed. Mainly because apparently Elvish has a lot of sweet nothings and very little words for concrete stuff. So if you want to exercise DA's Elvish, you better get those two in bed, stat!
I'm already checking out appropriate sweet nothings, but you know, that Chantry boy is not exactly easy to get in the tent. He waffles in such an endearing way, though, and I'm sure Wraith will be up to the challenge. Dalish hunters are nothing if not persistent.
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ShadowKnight: Thank you! The last thing I want to do is lose the very thing about Alistair that makes him so damned sexy...that good-natured vulnerability. Gods, he's delicious... and Wraith is getting sucked right in no matter how hard he digs his heel in.
Wraith's name... avid RPer that I am, I imagined he would not want to give his name that his clan knows him by, not to all these strangers, and with all he feels he's lost, he is very much a wraith.
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Pen Name: BronxWench
Story Link: Story: The Gift
Review Replies: Review Replies for AFF Prompt/Gifts - AFF Community Forums
Type of Fic: FlashFic
Rating: Adult
Fandom: Dragon Age: Origins
Pairing: N/A
Warnings: AFFO, ChallengeFic, Complete, NoSex
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JayDee: Thank you! I think what I'm happiest about with this one is that despite most people not being familiar with the fandom, the mood is coming across well, so, YAY! And as to any proto romances, stick around! I have a feeling those two aren't done with me yet...
And definitely play the game... I've played all sorts of CRPGs, and this is hands-down one of the best. I haven't flipped for a game like this since Planescape: Torment or Baldur's Gate.
Review Replies for Alchemy
in General
Posted
ShadowKnight: Let me start by saying that I adore your reviews, seriously, because you always make me look at my fic in a clearer light! So, thank you!
It was a melodramatic chapter, indeed! And I admit I really did go to town on Vale's reaction. I'll have to play with Beredir a bit. What I had intended, and obviously didn't get across properly, was that Beredir is walking a fine line between being Sand's friend from his youth, and having become Vale's friend as well. Whenever you're caught in the middle between friends ending a relationship, it can be gruesome, as I've learned first-hand. I was hoping to convey that Beredir might know things that Sand has told him, but that he won't tell Vale, and vice versa. I'm going to ponder, and may bounce a few ideas off of you!
The timeskip was another tough part for me to write. I wanted to highlight the major events without getting into too much detail, especially since this is leapfrogging past the events of the fic with the genasi. I can probably add a bit more to that without making the chapter turn into a fic of its own...
And in case I don't say it enough, thank you.