Chapter 4. Instinct Reset: Primera & Sexta & Octava, Oh My!
I've included a link for the song set referenced in this chapter to my Youtube playlist if you want to listen.
On 2013-3-14 FicticiousDelicious wrote:
Of course the author can do whatever she wants with a character, but if it's doesn't seem appropriate, then it ruins the experience. Mmmn. With Grimm, I was thinking that because he's got such a macho exterior, that perhaps he's hiding a needy, and sometimes insecure facet. In the first instance, his whimper reflects his needing to fulfill his lust. Later, it's given in submission to his Alpha, and at the end, it's involuntary after his stupendous orgasm. It's one of those embarrassing, uncontrollable quirks a person has but tries to hide unless something (like an aphrodisiac hiding in the drug or fear from someone stronger) reveals it accidentally. I'm sure you can think of something you'd not want the public to see, but might sneak out if you're not vigilant. Mine is rocking. With no rocking chair! I do it when I'm alone (doin' right now!), but sometimes I'm at work, having my break alone and rocking while listening to music or something. Then, someone walks in and I instantly stop. I don't think anyone knows. Heh, heh.
Yeah, he's not been a fully developed character in canon, because he's sleeps a lot and behaves so apathetically. However, I believe that once I explain the reason for his apparent lethargy, and remove it, I'll have a blank canvas to make him whatever I think he should be, given the backstory I'm crafting. Since the drug he was given is directly related to lifting the "curse of somnolency", you've witnessed what I think is underneath. We'll see if I'm consistent in future chapters. If not, poke me.
*big grin* I just love how you question everything. Got me backed into a corner. No wait, I come out swinging, and ... yes! A right hook to the jaw. Okay, so Grimm was not under the influence of the drug when mouthing off to Tosen, but it wouldn't have mattered because when I (later) describe what the drug actually did, you'll see that who he defers to is important. His desire to overpower Starrk is not crushed by his acquiescence; he's just put in his place for now, but he still desires to be Top Dog. The drug is influencing him now, though, and well, I can't give away future details, but it's part of the "solid reason". Yes, I believe Grimmjow is thoughtful enough to consider leadership qualities. Have you seen what his options were so far? Delusional Aizen and/or his minions, ancient Baraggan, sleepy Starrk, and an androphobic Harribel. The new and improved Starrk is far and away the best choice for a leader.
LOL! I think of Szayel as very flexible. Even though it hurts at first, he's very into the sensations and is able to turn it into pleasure. I just watched a guy (ahem -- research) that I thought embodied Szayel. Slender with long blond hair (I subbed in pink), big eyes and pouty lips. He had a feminine quality about him but was not a shemale and had a voracious appetite for c0ck, both orally and anally. I mean, no theatrics in pretending to like it, he enjoyed himself and you could tell by his stiff reaction, moaning and the colour in his cheeks. He was with two men, double stuffed, and was quite happy about it. And talented! Deep throat with no gagging. Mmmmn. Great inspiration derived from reality. Oooops! Did I share too much? Heh, heh.
I can see that you're trying to point out a problem with the (technical?) sexual aspects of this encounter. It is my first (literary) threesome, so I wouldn't claim to be proficient, however, I'd like more specific critique. Email me with your thoughts, k? I'm not certain how to improve based on this response.
TicLic, I just want to thank you for your thoughtful reviews, you always give me reasons to think and defend my position; that's very helpful in fleshing out my story. Also, thanks for defending this chapter's inclusion of music, demonstrating not only your courage in speaking your mind, but your compassion in aiding a friend. Mucho appreciation.