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Posted

Pretty chill chapter. Not a whole lot happening, still fantastic. Plenty of humor and parts that had me smiling like an idiot. (I'm looking at you, end of the chapter.)

Can't wait for the next chapter, as I feel we might have just had a Thanksgiving eye of the storm, but who knows. Still plenty of unaddressed problems. (Will Joe get suicidal?)

Posted

Again, I think that Rhona is the mastermind behind the prostitution ring at the high school. She keeps popping up at the school with questionable motives. And her questioning of Jack regarding whether or not he has found out who was behind the ring along with her justification for the high school girls to be acting the way they are is really suspicious. Once again Joe it was great read. Thank you for the chapter and Happy Thanksgiving. Just wondering if you're going to be eating any peady paws with your Thanksgiving dinner?

Posted (edited)

Again, I think that Rhona is the mastermind behind the prostitution ring at the high school. She keeps popping up at the school with questionable motives. And her questioning of Jack regarding whether or not he has found out who was behind the ring along with her justification for the high school girls to be acting the way they are is really suspicious.

Yes, and Rhona made the compliment about if the ring leader was a student "they'd be some budding entrepeneur" or something to that affect.

I don't think Mrs. Hanigan's maiden name was ever mentioned (i reread the paragraph)...unless it was Boring. Hey, I have a lot of Boring cousins, along with the Dicks and the Heads.

Edited by Joe Long
Posted

Yes, and Rhona made the compliment about if the ring leader was a student "they'd be some budding entrepeneur" or something to that affect.

I didn't think Mrs. Hanigan's maiden name was ever mentioned (i reread the paragraph)...unless it was Boring. Hey, I have a lot of Boring cousins, along with the Dicks and the Heads.

Either she's showing up for Jack, or she's using Jack as the excuse, she always seems to have one. She could be fishing for that extra money for an apartment. Rhona is still a mystery for the most part. We don't know a whole lot about her.

I was happy to see Jack mentioning his grandparents. At least we know he has them. They could've been dead. (All mine are) Still no other family though. I can't remember if Mike has any siblings. And is it just Hannah and Blanche?

Posted

I was happy to see Jack mentioning his grandparents. At least we know he has them. They could've been dead. (All mine are) Still no other family though. I can't remember if Mike has any siblings. And is it just Hannah and Blanche?

Jack's grandparents were mentioned once before. They sent presents last Christmas. Mike has a sister that has been mentioned, although I will have to go back and look up her name (unless someone else remembers it).

Posted

Chester, I believe Mike's sister is named Veronica. She was mentioned as Aunt Veronica in chapter 24.

Posted

Chester, I believe Mike's sister is named Veronica. She was mentioned as Aunt Veronica in chapter 24.

There are people that know everything about Harry Potter or Star Trek. We know everything about Jack & Kayla's world.

Posted

Chester, I believe Mike's sister is named Veronica. She was mentioned as Aunt Veronica in chapter 24.

Thanks, Dark! You are right on Chapter 24, however, her name is Vanessa-- not Veronica. Jack was trying to understand Mike's extreme attitude concerning the twins' incest and asked his father if Aunt Vanessa ever came on to him when they were younger. Mike said that it never happened.

Posted

Amanda: "I kinda hate guys right now."

Joe Long's theory that Amanda will go with a girl got a boost with this chapter. Helena has cut off Sam from hanging with her group and Amanda is now her favourite. I'm looking for them to hook up by Christmas.

And the kicker-- Hannah and Mike won't be able to say a word since they apparently have no problem with gays.

Posted

There are people that know everything about Harry Potter or Star Trek. We know everything about Jack & Kayla's world.

Lol, yeah we've got their world down pat. So much so that we go over the top sometimes with connections and shit. I love it.

Posted (edited)

And the kicker-- Hannah and Mike won't be able to say a word since they apparently have no problem with gays.

I don't recall any hints about their politics, but I'd suspect they'd try their best to be happy and accepting of it on the outside while being torn on the inside.

To get to the real life subtlety of the matter, for many it's one thing to say that you have no problem with gays, but another to actually, up close and personal, watch you daughter kiss another girl.

Edited by Joe Long
Posted

I wish this story gets completed before world war III,as we are just at verge of it

Posted

Hey everyone!

So I was making my yearly list of the things I'm most thankful for and the shortlist basically goes like this: my beautiful wife, my friends, my health...and all of you.

As much as I love my story, I doubt I'd have been inclined to continue it without all of you here to read and support me. I never thought, when I started this series, that it would go this long, nor that it would get the response and support that it has. You are all wonderful readers and it's such a joy to read your thoughts and theories, even if they are completely insane. It's the greatest feeling an author can have to know that his fan scan stick around so long after the story has started and still enjoy it just as much as they did when it started. So this Thanksgiving, I'm giving a big shout-out to all of you. You're all wonderful fans, amazing readers, and close friends.

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving and I hope you're all spending it without someone important to you.

Love, Joe

Posted

Hey Joe,

I'd like to see three things happen in Chapter 45-- call it my Christmas Wish list:

1) As Mike Harrison suggested, I'd like to see Jack go over to Joe's house to try to smooth things over so we can finally meet his family.

2) I'd like to see Belle reconcile with Jack. I know that she and Joe are done but maybe they can be civil to each other.

3) I'd still like to see Becca and Kayla have it out-- not necessarily a fight but perhaps a few low-key death threats.

Happy Holidays! :)

Posted

Hey everyone! Hope you all had a great Thanksgiving and are comfortably digesting without putting yourselves through too much stress for holiday shopping. Didn't do any shopping myself, if only because I still have nightmares from when I worked retail on Black Friday.

Anyway, it's time to do the Reality Check:

- Craig talking with Jack after a period of silence happened way more often than I would have liked in high school. Personally, I absolutely despise the silent treatment and always did my best to talk out anything bothering me with my friends...which put me in the tiny minority of people who actually did. As such, I basically had to wait for them to come to me.

- The character I based Rhona off of actually did have a 'title' she liked being referred to as, although I never did. Like Jack, I once called her by her 'title' to basically placate her and she immediately jumped down my throat. I thought she would have liked it but apparently it wasn't 'me'.

- My cousin just recently got a boyfriend (different name) and the conversation went pretty much exactly like how Jack and Tara's did, with some slight alterations.

- Jack's conversation with Amanda about trying to get Joe back as a friend was based off a similar one I had with a female friend of mine when I asked her if it was okay to still be friends with her ex-boyfriend (he hadn't cheated on her but it was a nasty breakup). Originally, I had planned for this conversation to be with Belle, but...well, the story didn't turn out that way (much to my surprise). It's always kind of nice when the story can surprise you.

- My family never had a Thanksgiving get-together the same size as the one the Hannigans did in this chapter (my family lived very far from our nearest family member), but the topic of my college choice was one that dominated the Thanksgiving of my Junior year.

- Jack's use of the website, it's content, and it's result are all exactly how I chose my college, though I actually made my decision back in 8th grade and never saw a reason to change it.

Work on Chapter 45 is going well and I'm hoping to get two more chapters out before the end of the year. Just so you all know, Chapter 45 is going to be the last chapter of the Fracture Saga, but the first chapter of the next saga (whose title I will keep to myself for right now) is a necessary one to get out as soon as possible and I think it's a fitting chapter to end the year on.

Also, I will be taking a road trip with my wife at the end of December for a week, meaning I will not be able to write or update. Just figured I'd let you guys know.

Hope you're all doing well and I'll see you again soon :)

Posted

I hope no one dies. (Seriously, what if someone was in a car accident or some shit?)

I've got a couple pieces to add.

First, I'm looking forward to some serious throw down. Like something huge going down. I don't know what, and I don't know why, but that's what I'm looking forward to. Dues ex machina.

As well, I want to learn more about Kayla's past, as well as Jack's. We knew Kayla kind of threw herself around for attention, feeling the need to fit in. I know Kayla and Jack are a package deal, but I'd be interesting to see Kayla meet someone. All of Kayla's friends are through Jack. Don't know if that'd be super relevant to the main plot line, but hell, it'd make for something interesting. (Even more substance!) What if Kayla's bestie from her old town came to visit? (Surprise! Jeff's back!) Just some sort of character development not based off Jack. You could argue, (and I'll argue) that this story is as much about Kayla as it is about Jack. She Is The One. Maybe we'll get it later, but I've been dying for some more background info on either of them. (Can Jack go meet Kayla's extended family? - does she have any?) Just adds for more analysis on the characters.

I've got some rereading to do, and I may be back with some extra analysis on our main man. Talked to someone today who made me rethink a couple things about Jack. (In my own mind, they don't read or know about the story.)

Furthermore, if this is the last chapter of the fracture saga coming up, then there's still a lot of problems to be resolved. Maybe the next saga will blend with this one. Obviously issues don't end with sagas, but in the past, the bulk has been resolved. Hmm.

Posted

As well, I want to learn more about Kayla's past, as well as Jack's. We knew Kayla kind of threw herself around for attention, feeling the need to fit in. I know Kayla and Jack are a package deal, but I'd be interesting to see Kayla meet someone. All of Kayla's friends are through Jack. Don't know if that'd be super relevant to the main plot line, but hell, it'd make for something interesting.

That's an idea. The most likely scenario is that Kayla meets someone at the animal clinic, like a veterinary student who works there part time. They'd have a lot in common and it would be an interesting counter-point to the Jack-Rhona friendship.

Posted

That's an idea. The most likely scenario is that Kayla meets someone at the animal clinic, like a veterinary student who works there part time. They'd have a lot in common and it would be an interesting counter-point to the Jack-Rhona friendship.

Especially if it's a dude. We'll see how Jack deals with another main man in his (with regards to Kayla) life. Jacks texts Kayla, gets no response, assumes the worst. Granted, Jack hasn't really hung out with Rhona outside work or Kayla. Does Kayla get defensive when Jack asks questions? Is he some muscly college dude, as Rhona is a well endowed college (or post college rather) girl?

Posted

Especially if it's a dude. We'll see how Jack deals with another main man in his (with regards to Kayla) life. Jacks texts Kayla, gets no response, assumes the worst. Granted, Jack hasn't really hung out with Rhona outside work or Kayla. Does Kayla get defensive when Jack asks questions? Is he some muscly college dude, as Rhona is a well endowed college (or post college rather) girl?

Sure, why not? Let it be a brainy, good looking twenty-one year old college guy-- someone that Kayla would be attracted to. It would be interesting to see Jack's reaction.

Guest JohnnyBanana
Posted

So some seriously crazy shit happened to me.

First, I'll apologize for my lack of presence on this forum. Been busy. Dropped out of college because my friend got really sick. Now I'm working 40+ hours of retail during the busiest time of the year. Excuses over.

On to the crazy shit. As I said, I dropped out of college. Well, I was going to visit all my friends but when I got on interstate 44, my car broke down. I was about an hour away. So I text my friend I'm not going to be able to make it down. She was in class at the time. She walked out of class and told me, despite all my protests and telling her she didn't have to, she's coming to pick me up. She drove an hour to pick me up off the side of the road and took me back to campus with her. I am now dating said girl.

Sound familiar?

Guest JohnnyBanana
Posted

I hope no one dies. (Seriously, what if someone was in a car accident or some shit?)

I've got a couple pieces to add.

First, I'm looking forward to some serious throw down. Like something huge going down. I don't know what, and I don't know why, but that's what I'm looking forward to. Dues ex machina.

As well, I want to learn more about Kayla's past, as well as Jack's. We knew Kayla kind of threw herself around for attention, feeling the need to fit in. I know Kayla and Jack are a package deal, but I'd be interesting to see Kayla meet someone. All of Kayla's friends are through Jack. Don't know if that'd be super relevant to the main plot line, but hell, it'd make for something interesting. (Even more substance!) What if Kayla's bestie from her old town came to visit? (Surprise! Jeff's back!) Just some sort of character development not based off Jack. You could argue, (and I'll argue) that this story is as much about Kayla as it is about Jack. She Is The One. Maybe we'll get it later, but I've been dying for some more background info on either of them. (Can Jack go meet Kayla's extended family? - does she have any?) Just adds for more analysis on the characters.

I've got some rereading to do, and I may be back with some extra analysis on our main man. Talked to someone today who made me rethink a couple things about Jack. (In my own mind, they don't read or know about the story.)

Furthermore, if this is the last chapter of the fracture saga coming up, then there's still a lot of problems to be resolved. Maybe the next saga will blend with this one. Obviously issues don't end with sagas, but in the past, the bulk has been resolved. Hmm.

What if Joe rewrote the first saga through Kayla's perspective? He could start with when Jack's parents came over for dinner, we'd know Kayla's first impression of Jack, and he could throw in as much of her background as he wanted pretty much anywhere throughout the saga.
Posted (edited)

What if Joe rewrote the first saga through Kayla's perspective? He could start with when Jack's parents came over for dinner, we'd know Kayla's first impression of Jack, and he could throw in as much of her background as he wanted pretty much anywhere throughout the saga.

Yeah, but I think Joe specifically stated that he wouldn't write from anyone else's perspective in this story. I don't remember exactly when he said, but I do recall him mentioning that in a much earlier post.

Although, I would enjoy that. The hardest part, I think, would be writing how a girl thinks. I'd assume he'd probably have to go to his wife a lot more. I'm not sure, but at least for me, writing a different gender perspective is hard, because I don't know how they think. If I did, I'd probably write some manual on that and get filthy rich. I can write how a girl talks and acts, but not how they think.

It could stand for a window of perspective completely unique to Jack's. It'd be cool to see into her mind, and see more plot details. So I'd be behind it, but I'm pretty sure it won't happen.

Edited by thismy
Posted

On to the crazy shit. As I said, I dropped out of college. Well, I was going to visit all my friends but when I got on interstate 44, my car broke down. I was about an hour away. So I text my friend I'm not going to be able to make it down. She was in class at the time. She walked out of class and told me, despite all my protests and telling her she didn't have to, she's coming to pick me up. She drove an hour to pick me up off the side of the road and took me back to campus with her. I am now dating said girl.

Sound familiar?

Hell, yeah! That sounds like the story that Mike Harrison related to Jack about his early days with Hannah.

Good to hear from you, Johnny. We all hope your dad is feeling better these days and best of luck with your new girl.

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