magusfang Posted December 17, 2014 Author Report Posted December 17, 2014 silly me, and I thought this was an ankle spanker: turns out... Quote
jelad Posted December 17, 2014 Report Posted December 17, 2014 wow, I am stunned, this is my number 1 favorite chapter yet. you had so much in it that it could of easily been a lot longer. thanks for separating the chapters of the home group and the ones that went to fight, it made it a lot easier to understand. Can't wait to see the fallout of Max finding David and Cynthia. Quote
Guest Guest Posted December 17, 2014 Report Posted December 17, 2014 I will say that I did like the chapter. However, I m slightly disappointed that you brought backing the father and sister. After ten years its a little far fetched. Its a great twist, I agree, but lacks a feel of reality. Yes I know its fiction. However if David and Cynthia. Have been kept alive, for what purpose?if David was building weapons, they would be used somewhere, Alice would have picked up some remnants of the talk of the technology. Max would have known sooner that the were alive. Perhaps he would have gone to get them sooner and never met the girls. I see no logical reason to have kept them alive. This is of course if it is them and not a trick. I don't see this bad Guy getting up. A smashed in face bleeding bad and he's not in the best of health as it is. Could this be a plot twist that gives them a new enemy. Anyway just my two cents. Quote
BigMan7307 Posted December 18, 2014 Report Posted December 18, 2014 All along, Max and June have been under the impression that David and Cindy are dead. Think for just one minute about how you would feel about your long lost parent and sister coming back from the dead.... How is that going to change your view on your reality? Everything that you've been told or have known is a LIE, the only reality that you have is what you yourself created. You realize that you can't trust anyone anymore. The only one or ones you can rely on are the ones closest to you. Talk about the ultimate in paranoia.... you think everyone is out to get you, and they actually are, it's not just in your head anymore. Quote
Sniper014 Posted December 18, 2014 Report Posted December 18, 2014 Here he goes again. Messing with our minds. If these are truly his dad and sister then why did the Crypt Keeper not use the knowledge that David had in his mind to develop the weapons for his members and use them against Max and his family. I think that the are not his real father and sister but people made to look like them to mess with Max's mind. We will just have to wait and see what the master has in mind to release to us followers. Come on master release the next chapter of this story of Northstar to your happy hooked followers who are just waiting for the the release. Like you said, just think of all the different paths that you could go down to tell this next few parts of the story. Are they real or Memorex. Only the great Magus knows for sure. Quote
magusfang Posted December 18, 2014 Author Report Posted December 18, 2014 Or are they imposters brainwashed to kill him...hmmmmm COJimmyV 1 Quote
Sniper014 Posted December 18, 2014 Report Posted December 18, 2014 Or are they imposters brainwashed to kill him...hmmmmm Only you know and you will only let us know when your evil mind wants to. Keep up the good work and since your are banned to your office it gives you a great time to continue the story. just think - evil cyborgs programmed to kill the good guy and his family. Talk about putting the foxes in the hen house. Who would think that they are imposters. Maybe Alice and May would. Also I did pick up the part about the blood fluid leaking from his body. Not blood but anti-freeze (body fluid needed for the robot part of the body. Will have to see when the next chapter is released. Quote
BigMan7307 Posted December 18, 2014 Report Posted December 18, 2014 Well, he's gone and done it again, got us all thinking and wondering, then poof, the second holiday in a month hits. He also kinda threw an idea at me a while ago, it just took me a little while to piece it together, it's a work in progress, and definitely not of Magus' quality, but, wth, I kinda enjoyed putting it down. Quote
magusfang Posted December 18, 2014 Author Report Posted December 18, 2014 I'm glad your writing and please, your last story was wonderful...sad but still well written Quote
angeldust Posted December 18, 2014 Report Posted December 18, 2014 The more writers the merrier. @: Magus what are you releasing next GITG or NorthStar? Inquisitive minds, or at least insane ones, want to know. Quote
magusfang Posted December 18, 2014 Author Report Posted December 18, 2014 GITG you know I haven't even looked at Northstar in Lima a month, have to read the last chapter to figure out where I left of. Quote
Rescue25 Posted December 18, 2014 Report Posted December 18, 2014 GITG you know I haven't even looked at Northstar in Lima a month, have to read the last chapter to figure out where I left of. OK but how about some GITG before you start reading?? Doing daddy daycare should give you more keyboard time. B Quote
magusfang Posted December 18, 2014 Author Report Posted December 18, 2014 OK but how about some GITG before you start reading?? Doing daddy daycare should give you more keyboard time. B You'd think...but its amazing how much trouble this little monkey can get into...LOL Quote
Guest Golie Posted December 18, 2014 Report Posted December 18, 2014 If that's Max's father and sister, resentments, embarrassments, and a damn big gorilla will be inserted in the story. They will have to be told about May/June, the baby that was lost, Rick and May, etc, etc. The story will be a mess. Very good story I might add! I love your writing but finding them, rehabilitating and curing them will throw a spanner in the works. Just my take. Keep up the good work. Why would Vol.. keep them alive though? Waiting with bated breath for the next chapter, of ANY one of the stories., Quote
Rescue25 Posted December 19, 2014 Report Posted December 19, 2014 Well, he's gone and done it again, got us all thinking and wondering, then poof, the second holiday in a month hits. He also kinda threw an idea at me a while ago, it just took me a little while to piece it together, it's a work in progress, and definitely not of Magus' quality, but, wth, I kinda enjoyed putting it down. I like it. When is chap. 3 coming? B Quote
Rescue25 Posted December 19, 2014 Report Posted December 19, 2014 (edited) You'd think...but its amazing how much trouble this little monkey can get into...LOL Yes but that is some of what makes them so loveable. A little training from uncle Fang may ease the chase. won't happen overnight but the younguns catch on quickly. B Edited December 19, 2014 by Rescue25 Quote
magusfang Posted December 19, 2014 Author Report Posted December 19, 2014 i think she's training me... COJimmyV and Rescue25 2 Quote
Rescue25 Posted December 19, 2014 Report Posted December 19, 2014 i think she's training me... Isn't that the name of a series. "Are we training the children or are they training us" B Quote
magusfang Posted December 19, 2014 Author Report Posted December 19, 2014 Isn't that the name of a series. "Are we training the children or are they training us" B not that kind of training lol, despite what happens in my stories Quote
BigMan7307 Posted December 19, 2014 Report Posted December 19, 2014 I like it. When is chap. 3 coming? B Working on it as i speak, almost half through. Quote
BigMan7307 Posted December 19, 2014 Report Posted December 19, 2014 Isn't that the name of a series. "Are we training the children or are they training us" B With children, and animals, we always wonder who's being taught. They open their mouth, we learn they are hungry, so we feed them. You let the dog outside, when they come in from outside, they get a treat, they will go out, then stand on the porch and let you know they're ready to come in. When you hear their yip, you come to the door, let them in, and give them their treat. Who got trained in the process? Btw, to save questions, and traffic here regarding my stories here's the link to my forum..... http://www2.adult-fanfiction.org/forum/index.php/topic/58615-bigman7307s-spot/ Quote
Rescue25 Posted December 19, 2014 Report Posted December 19, 2014 With children, and animals, we always wonder who's being taught. They open their mouth, we learn they are hungry, so we feed them. You let the dog outside, when they come in from outside, they get a treat, they will go out, then stand on the porch and let you know they're ready to come in. When you hear their yip, you come to the door, let them in, and give them their treat. Who got trained in the process? Btw, to save questions, and traffic here regarding my stories here's the link to my forum..... http://www2.adult-fanfiction.org/forum/index.php/topic/58615-bigman7307s-spot/ Thanks for the link. Have you bookmarked. I have read somewhere that when you take a dog to the trainers YOU are the one actually being trained. B Quote
magusfang Posted December 19, 2014 Author Report Posted December 19, 2014 Thanks for the link. Have you bookmarked. I have read somewhere that when you take a dog to the trainers YOU are the one actually being trained. B I'm living with eight women, "Not counting the dog, Ranging from four to fourty plus...I've been trained long ago! Quote
BigMan7307 Posted December 19, 2014 Report Posted December 19, 2014 I'm living with eight women, "Not counting the dog, Ranging from four to fourty plus...I've been trained long ago! Nah, we're never fully trained, just relatively domesticated. Always going to be that Work in Progress, I think that's why they keep us around, either that, or to chase the mice when they run through the yard :/ Quote
magusfang Posted December 19, 2014 Author Report Posted December 19, 2014 spiders, i'm here to kill spiders Quote
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