Personal Details

[Guest Alien Pirate Pixagi]

How much of your real life spills out into your stories? Are you a strong believer in "write what you know," or are you just making it all up?

If something seriously affected your personal life, would you have a problem turning it into a story, original or fan fic, and posting it up for the world to see? Would you use the pen name you always use, or would you use a different alias? If you read a story by another person that was basically about you and that person, would you be upset?

I HAVE written AND posted some very personal stories in the past. Now, very little of my real life trickles out onto paper, so to speak, and I wonder if my writing suffers from that. I now feel weird sharing my personal life with the folks here.

Furthermore, I don't know how I would feel finding a story by an ex (friend or otherwise) about us. I think it kind of depends on the situation, and how truthful the person is being, or if the person is being intentionally hurtful. However, if I found one where the person seemed to be simply trying to heal, or just get it out in the open, then I'd like to think I'd be okay with it. Possibly hurt (likely guilty), but okay.

[Leonhart29]

Actually - I try very hard to keep my personal life out of my fiction. The name of the game for me is fiction which by definition shouldn't have anything really to do with reality. I have a journal that I write my personal junk in (and a wee little rant thread), so it doesn't really benefit me to put it into my stories. Probably why I shelved one story before it even got off the drawing board.

[madlodger]

It's probably different for different people. Some people are exibitionists, they would actually enjoy sharing their private lives with readers.

Personally, I never even kept a Personal Journal, so it's not likely that any of my stories would contain blow-by-blow personal accounts or conversations. I'd get really pissed off if my ex wrote and posted anything of personal nature. He doesn't write, thankfully

On another hand, ANYTHING we write does represent ourselves, made-up or not. Sure, I have Draco talking to Pansy in the story, but, well, isn't it like Myself talking to Myself inside my own head? Because there is no Draco. Or Pansy.

As for "write what you know," well, I don't know about dragons or magic or time travel. Noone does, ha. I believe in: "write what ever the heck you please" theory.

[Leonhart29]

Hmmm - I had forgotten about the ex writing something about you thing. My ex doesn't write anything but sermons and possibly a police report or two depending on if he got caught doing something - so that doesn't worry me. My current boyfriend does write - and he's very good at it, but I trust him explicitly. And God forbid something should happen to our relationship I know he wouldn't take it out on me in his writing - he's just not like that. I know I wouldn't do it either - so no worries right?

[Guest Alien Pirate Pixagi]

As for "write what you know," well, I don't know about dragons or magic or time travel. Noone does, ha. I believe in: "write what ever the heck you please" theory.

Er... I think people take that FAR too literally.

The way I interpret "write what you know" is, while I may never have fought a dragon, I

HAVE been in love. So, when writing romance, a good amount of my own remembered/current emotions go into the story, if not the exact situations themselves.

So, really, I guess it should be "Write what you feel"

[dazzledfirestar]

I think little bits of me seep into my works sometimes, but I have never intentionally written about something that has happened in my life. In fact, most of what I write is so far removed from my day to day life that I'm having a hard time thinking of anything major that I could work in... hmm...

As for the "write what you know" discussion, well, I've never attended Hogwarts, and I'm not a mutant... so that is obviously out. But, I have been in love, I have had sex, I have been in long term relationships, and those themes pop up quite often. So yes, I do write what I know... and then I connect it to whatever has popped into my head.

... Now obviously the MSV girls are an exception to this, but that's just a light hearted connection... or at least, it started out that way... hmmm...

[madlodger]

I HAVE been in love. So, when writing romance, a good amount of my own remembered/current emotions go into the story, if not the exact situations themselves.

You are talking about gaining experience as a person here. Writers are people and their writing IS based on their personal experiences and lessons learned. In that context, "write what you know" is correct.

[Keith Inc.]

To me, all story writing is about characters.

Which makes characterization an important part of the work.

Some events in my life have helped me develop as a person, as a character, or highlight the sort of person i've developed into.

Characters in 'What's Love Got To Do With It?' have a fight that my wife and i had when we first started dating. Almost word for word (except neither of us was Lilliputian at the time), it highlights the couple feeling their way through their relationship.

My military experience is a lens that focuses my characters in uniforms. A clear understanding of why certain officers were my favorites (or my nemesis) informs the behaviors of the captain of 'Excelsior' or my veteran zookeeper in 'Lamia.'

And various conversations i've had, in real life and online, that fleshed out an idea or ideal of mine have made it into my dialogues, more or less edited to streamline the exposition.

So, real life is but one of the brushes i use assemble my paintings.

In addition:

'Our Next Caller' was inspired by a radio station that encouraged their readers to visit 'freaky sex' sites they linked to, one being a fetish site i hung out at.

'Dolly' was born in my head from watching my kids fight over who got to play with a certain toy.

'Significance of Dream Elements' comes almost entirely from a dream...that my wife had.

[Iggy_lovechild]

Sometimes in original fiction, a bit of myself bleeds through, but it fanfiction...not much. More like my experience in relationships and how people interact but never myself.

[cu-kid9]

You are talking about gaining experience as a person here. Writers are people and their writing IS based on their personal experiences and lessons learned. In that context, "write what you know" is correct.

I agree with this statement. I also think, too, that it's not just your own personal experiences that you use in your writing. I'm in the middle of a story where the main character's ex is abusive and crazy. I don't, personally, have any experience with this -but a good friend of mine does. I've listened to her talk about it enough that, when she read the part with the crazy ex in it, she said it gave her chills because it reminded her of things that had happened to her. Sure, of course it did, because I know how it affects a person now.

"Write what you feel," sure, that works; but I think that writers internalize, consciously or subconsciously, the things that go on outside of their personal lives. And, sometimes, they observe the same thing going on over and over -in which case, you could honestly say that you are writing what you know. None of us may have slain or ridden or befriended a dragon, but I'll bet that I've read enough about doing all of those things that I could write about it (not well, mind you, but I'll bet I could).

Or maybe I'm taking this too literally, too.

Besides, I think writing is about 10% fact and 90% imagination anyway.

[StoryJunkie]

I think as an exercise in writing, that is exactly what one must do: journalize a fragment of your life. Bring it to life. Put it under the microscope and present it in an objectified way that you know is almost so painfully subjective that you have to throw in something that connects you to your reader. Like: "Okay, that was too much information, wasn't it?"

Yet make it interesting

I was so pumped up when I wrote my little piece, because its like a performance. Ever perform? Like, on stage, or a presentation? Man. You have no idea what practice means until then. One of the ways I was able to present my life was to have written a part of it from 20 years gone by, from a perspective of it being a memory. That way...well...lets say life wears down your "embarrassment" chip.

The reviews for that work are the ones that are the most heart-pounding.

[DuranDuranfan]

I'm a firm believer in I Write What I Know, because more often, it happens on a subconscious level. Especially if you're writing about a character that you most identify with.

For example, whenever I write stuff about Billy the Blue Mighty Morphin Power Ranger, sometimes a lot of what I "theorize" especially about his past, mirrors my own life experiences. One story in particular that I have at FF.net is Tears of Blood, Prisoner Of Pain. It deals with Billy getting constantly hounded by bullies and how no one would help him. I was bullied in the past, and no one helped me, plus if I stood up for myself, I got in trouble for it. I included a scene of that happening to Billy in that particular fanfic.

[Kyouryoku Senshi]

I am also a believer in 'Writing what you know.' One thing I hate when I read stories is when people just beat around the bush, not even paying attention if the story is making sense or not.

[madlodger]

because its like a performance. Ever perform? Like, on stage, or a presentation? Man. You have no idea what practice means until then. One of the ways I was able to present my life was to have written a part of it from 20 years gone by, from a perspective of it being a memory. That way...well...lets say life wears down your "embarrassment" chip.

The reviews for that work are the ones that are the most heart-pounding.

I can see where you are coming from, SJ. Not everyone can do it, though. It would be like performing streaptease, in a way; streaptease of a soul. I am not being critical of it in any way, but heck, personally I'd prefer watching it, not performing.

[cu-kid9]

It would be like performing streaptease, in a way; streaptease of a soul.

Isn't that kind of the whole point though? I mean art, no matter what form it takes, is all about showing the world your self -no matter if that 'self' takes the form of some hard-ass anime character or a sharp tongued woman with an equally sharp blade. Even if we don't write about things that have personally happened to us, we embed ourselves into the stories we write. Why? Because we write what we know; we pick characters that we can relate to, we put them in situations that we may be familiar with.

Take HP, for example (sorry, this came to mind first because I just had this discussion with someone). Sure, Rowling doesn't have experience with going to wizarding school, or casting spells, or driving flying cars; but she's a mother and she writes about children coming of age, and the trials and tribulations they go through growing up -and that is what is so appealing about her books; that, in some way, we can all relate to Harry and his friends because we've all been at that awkward stage at one point in our lives.

I think that the characters we write about, no matter if they have spawned from our own imagination or someone else's, all carry a piece of us onto paper. I think a writer bares their soul every time they lay a pen to paper (or whatever), sometimes with the reader being none the wiser. If you write, you perform; there's no getting around it. Finishing a story, poem, whatever, is like the curtain closing on the last act, or the last note fading away, and you wait, with your heart pounding, to see how the audience is going to react. What a rush.

[Jadwin]

I'm a strong believer in not making stuff up if I can help it. That includes everything from actually checking out restaurants and stuff in San Francisco to knowing how the drive system worked on an old robot to knowing that Wal-Mart sells boxer shorts with disco dancing frogs on them. My characters have done all sorts of weird things, but they're not exactly in the realm of "no way," because so much of it has happened to me... Right down to the time I accidentally threw my glasses out of the bedroom window while... well, I'm sure you get the point lol.

I've injected a co-worker into something I'm working on. If I hadn't have had to work with her for those four months, I probably wouldn't have even thought about the scenario her insert created.

[FairlightMuse]

Both. Obviously in fan fiction, there is more stuff that you personally wouldn't know, so you have to rely on imagination. But I believe in trying to write as much of what you know as possible, just to give the story some grounding.

[Listener]

Everything I write has at least a small part of myself in it, be it fanfic or realfic. In my AFF originals, the story of Tanya (that's her real name) appears in a few different places as background for what my characters do. Many of my other stories draw their main characters' characterizations from people I know in real life -- in my Marianne stories, for example, Michael and Rebecca are two people I know from high school, though I have no idea what either is doing right now, as I haven't talked to them in ages, and can't find them on MySpace.

As for personal experiences, I, like Jadwin, like to include little bits of reality, though I don't necessarily go out of my way to find out if something is true. Like, for example, in one thing I'm writing, I made up a bar/restaurant (think Chili's but with more American food) in Norfolk, Virginia, where they always show Miami Dolphins games. I'm sure such a bar exists, but I've never been to Norfolk, so I can't be certain. However, the bar is based on a real one I've been to in Florida.

I think the best stories incorporate reality and unreality -- the devil is in the details, whether it's a character tossing her lunch trash into a brown plastic Publix bag or doing something as simple as mentioning a seemingly-useless detail in passing. In reality, we notice the tiniest details most when we're focusing on something else. At least, I think so.

[Guest DarkAvenger]

I've written both about my own personal experiences and one of my close friend's experiences. Of course, I never make this information public and I change enough of it that it seems fundamentally different, though most aspects remain intact.

I'd never out the friend by saying "oh this was written because a friend of mine experienced it" or something, as that would be horribly wrong on so many levels.

Basically, everything we do - how we act, how we write, etc - all stem from who we are and the experiences we've had. No matter what we write, all of our life is in it. So if you let one experience trigger an entire story, so be it. It will likely go over better anyway because of the harsh reality of it. The fantasy ripped away and the truth revealed, so to speak.

[Avenging Angel]

Personally, I try to keep my personal life out of my fan fiction. While I'm writing my novel or my coursework, then that's different, I mean for coursework we're encouraged to put in personal experience. But for my novel, it just happened that way.

My fan fiction is a whole different matter. I really try to keep myself out of the fiction. I never write a Mary Sue, I never put in things I've been through. At most I put in something that happened on TV that I saw or something a friend told me.

I don't really know why I do this. I guess it's because I like being kind of annonymous. I like that when I'm writing a fic I don't have to deal with stuff. It's kind of freeing really.

[shinigamiinochi]

No, not my personal life, really, however my cousin is a victim of severe physical and sexual abuse and I have found that his voice pops up in quite a few of my stories. Then again, considering how close we are and how emotional i was when I found out about this, I guess it is a little personal.

[Kanashii]

My question is; How can you NOT write things based on your own experiences?

I have been to many countries, many locations, experienced what i have done myself, seen, heard or known in others. I think all authors and writers are (should be) GREAT observers of humanity and what is around them.

You may not be homeless, but certainly you have seen a homeless person, their shuffling walk, or the way they look at life through tormented and hopless eyes.

I think with us "oldsters" (those who are over 35) we have been around the block and seen and experienced much, so we have a greater 'database' where to write from. No, I am not a male 6'11 hitman, but I know what RAGE feels like inside me, and I know the pain of losing someone close.

I may not be a 69 year old Mafia Don, but again, I know certain emotions and how certain currents and activities run in the deep city (being I was born in Chicago, lived in NJ and Philadelphia) and have actually known people in the Mob.

I have lived in the South in Charleston and so know the sweet cloying scent of jasmine and magnolia draping over one on a hot swelter day, I have seen the eerie spanish moss in the moonlight framing the old antebellum plantations.

As a human, I have loved many, had sex with many, experimented much, have my own kinks and desires and fantasies...ALL of these things I think comes out to some degree in our writing.

It is very difficult to paint a picture for your reader if you cannot truly 'see' it in your own mind and soul. I have read stories where the writers ( you can tell) have never seen abuse, or had a night of wild sex, or visited England or whatnot, and the writing is 'flat' and without life because they are not giving the readers a sense of what is truly experienced....

Yes, even in SCI-FI, Anime, fantasy etc...Sure, we may have not seen or interacted with a dragon or Llamia, BUT, we can bring our human characters to life (and to some extent the dragons and naga's and llamia's as well) by putting EMOTIONS and subtle context of what we ourselves have seen, lived through, experienced with all of our senses and heart.

So that is my take on the whole thing, and as always JMHO.

[Pepperedjack]

For me, it’s not “write what you know,” it’s “know what you write.”

I do my best to stay invisible in what I write (not sure how successful I am, but it’s my goal). I research, and then hope my imagination carries me the rest of the way.

On one hand, I write about characters, acts, settings that interest me personally. On the other, I do not share my personal life in my writing. However, one’s personal experience, and one’s ability to observe the universe around them, to recall and carefully select just the right details is essential in crafting fiction.

Wow, I almost sound like I know what the hell I’m talking about. Ha!