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Ghost-of-a-Chance last won the day on May 5

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    Under a rock in the Missouri Ozarks
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    Rabid reader and writer. Occasional digital artist - hobbyist level.
    Unrepentant overthinker. Spotify addict and musical frissonist.
    Lover of symbolism, Drambuie, wildflowers, rainstorms, and foggy days.
    Certified Crazy Cat Lady - send me cats and I'll love you forever. Ask about my cats and I'll never shut up.
    Browser tab abuser - "online" may actually mean "nope, I'm not really here."

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  1. Well. It took close to a year and a half but we finally know why I’ve been having nerve pain and numbness and struggling to stand and walk. The ‘why’ is not an easily fixed condition (...possibly not “fixable” at all, from the sound of it...) but having an explanation for the problem is the first step on the path forward. I can’t even express how relieved I am to have physical proof that what I’ve been struggling with wasn’t just in my head; the fact that such was bothering me as strongly as it was should say something about how folks with invisible disabilities are often treated in the US. 

    I’m still stuck with walking with a cane for now. There are also orthotics, braces, medication, and routine specialist visits added to the equation now. I’m not crazy about that...but I’ll live. At least it’s not neuropathy and there’s a chance of some improvement with treatment, and so long as those two statements are true, I’m sure I can find a way to not whine too much. It’s a bonus that the medication I’m on now is helping with my bad knee (why I had the cane, to begin with) and I’ve got a very courteous and understanding doctor taking care of me. Maybe now that the testing and waiting are over, I’ll have a little more free time. If so, maybe I’ll be more able to use said free time for writing and updating. In the meantime, it’s good to be back on here even if only occasionally.

    Anyway. Dropping off the face of the earth without warning is kind of normal for me but...well...this is why I’ve been exceeding my usual DOtFotE statistics. In the coming months, if I get unusually bristly on here, say something unfriendly, or come across as short or rude, I apologize profusely in advance. I’m hanging in here the best I can...but...frankly, my nerves are compressed and sending pain and itching signals through otherwise healthy tissue, and there’s not a whole lot I can do when it gets really bad. There are days when it’s so bad I just want to cuss a blessed blue streak, cry, or both at once. Generally, I try to stay offline on days like that but they’ve snuck up on me before. If it happens, please be patient with me and let me know I’ve been a dick (because I probably won’t even realize it until later on when I’m trying to sleep) and I’ll apologize for it.

    Until next time, I hope everyone’s having a comfortable and safe spring, and wish y’all the best.


    1. Thundercloud


      Very important to know when things are real and not something we imagine. Sorry to hear they don’t have easy way to fix the issue, but medical science advance so who knows what might happen in the future. I hope things will improve for you even in the absence of a cure.

    2. BronxWench


      I’m very glad you have an answer now, and I’m hoping that treatment does continue to make a positive difference. I don’t think there’s anything worse than having to live with constant pain. So, gentle hugs from me! :hug: 

    3. JayDee


      Wish you all the best too. At least diagnosis gives you better options.