Desiderius Price

Good.  I could be persuaded to stop off for some hotdogs and marshmallows! 

We’re bringing back Wicker Man Wednesdays. 

@manta2g Think you need two of these… at least.  And… ☕ ☕ ☕

@manta2g Think you need two of these… at least.  And… ☕ ☕ ☕

Option two would definitely be up Youngman’s alley.
Meanwhile, I’ve been stuck with a Suzanne Vega earworm for the past several hours.  And, there’s nothing I can do do do duh do do do duh about it.  Not kidding about the earworm, though.
Cheers!

It’s provocative to say the least.  Maybe the man’s an idiot?  Maybe the man’s saying his wife’s too ugly to fuck?  Maybe she’s refusing his advances?  (And sneakily bopping his sister instead.)  Maybe he’s fitted a chastity belt onto her?  Number of reasons go through my head, which is about as interesting to the fact the mind spat that out yesterday morning as I woke up.

...or an opening joke from a Borscht Belt comedy routine.  Did you ever visit the Catskills in the ‘60s through the ‘80s?  Or, maybe you’re just channeling Rodney Dangerfield or Henny Youngman?  In my mind’s ear, I can hear either man saying exactly that on stage.
You could use the quote to open an Al Czervik based Caddyshack fan-fiction.
Cheers!

One page?  What’s the size of a page?  Use columns, and… reduce that font size...everybody should be able to read 1pt fonts!

Just make sure they don't throw in the free spay or neuter with your treatment. 

Thanks for the laugh, @GeorgeGlass.  If anyone said that fanfiction was easier than original work, it sure wasn’t me.  It’s not harder, either; but the challenges to write well in either one can vary.  Fanfiction for “non-episodic” canon stories almost always involves changes, along with either following canon, or explaining why you took a different path through the story itself. 
That’s why I’m working on Chapter 12, and I’m only putting Charlie Weasley on the Hogwarts Express.  While I’m effectively having to write a compressed story just to get to the ‘Harry Potter as lead protagonist’ part of my story, the other alternative would be a literal cosmic ass-pull, since Harry, Ron, and Neville will have changed that much by September of 1991.  It was tricky enough demonstrating that Petunia Evans had changed that much in Chapter 1, simply by choosing a different husband.

A serious fanfiction requires some level of effort… heck I consult the above even in my originals too.
For instance, lots of canon characters are very underdeveloped, so you gotta flesh them out into fullness that’s in line with canon (or in line with your premise).  Original characters… I actually have those developed better in my story than some of the canon!
However, if it’s a short fluff bit...well, you don’t have to work too hard if you’ve got something of Fred’s & George’s backfiring to fill all of Hogwarts up with daffodils.

Thanks for the link.  I did find a different site that also works fine, once I remembered to actually check moon phases.  Unlike JKR herself, I’m trying to use real life calendars instead of the “Rowling Calendar.”  So, my student band would have been out late, plus the first Hogsmeade Weekend on Saturday, with Sunday being a full moon. 
Once I remembered to check that too, I got it fixed.  And though the dates are only background ephemera otherwise, I also moved one or two other Hogsmeade Weekends.  I also inserted a statement that even seventh year students were restricted to the castle on full moon nights, and that “student werewolves” never rode the Hogwarts Express out or in on a day with a full moon night.  In “expanded canon,” there were actually two students (Chiara Lobasco and Remus Lupin) who attended and took their NEWTs after having been infected with Lycanthropy as young children.
The real pain is finding stuff like when O and A Level results should come in, and minimum ages for drivers licenses, which did change over the years.

I find it useful when… you know, a character’s outside at night, to know about where the moon is (ie before/after moonrise/moonset).  Another tool I’ve used is Stellarium (open source program), good for figuring the constellations/stars in the sky.

Very useful, TBH… is something like.  https://www.timeanddate.com/moon/usa/portland-or  (change location & date/time for needs.  Glasgow UK should be close enough for Hogwarts.)

😅 HR should know better than hire activists.

The youngings did something?  Or management trying to send a message?

The youngings did something?  Or management trying to send a message?

Plenty of 🍀 leprechaun 🪙 gold 🌈 …. oops, it vanished before I could send it.  
Happy Birthday @BronxWench
🧙‍♂️ 🧑‍🎄 🎂

Thank you!  

Plenty of 🍀 leprechaun 🪙 gold 🌈 …. oops, it vanished before I could send it.  
Happy Birthday @BronxWench
🧙‍♂️ 🧑‍🎄 🎂

Ages ago when I started my main potter fanfic, I did write up a spreadsheet.  And when I came back to it after a decade hiatus – it’s been a godsend for trying to remember how things were setup, what to elaborate more on, etc.

Ages ago when I started my main potter fanfic, I did write up a spreadsheet.  And when I came back to it after a decade hiatus – it’s been a godsend for trying to remember how things were setup, what to elaborate more on, etc.