The whole LEMON STARTS HERE and LEMON ENDS HERE bit is enough to make me want to take a bat to someone. I'm sorry, but if I'm reading on here I rather expect smut to come into play somewhere unless there is a nosex tag on it. Nor am I going to have vapors and faint dead away if I find said smut in a story somewhere. If you're posting on AFF and reading on here then the fact that a story contains it isn't going to come as a complete and utter shock <sarcasm> though if it's well written by someone who has working knowledge of sexual escapades and the mechanics there of might</sarcasm>. Nor do you need to warn minors its there (let's face it folks, even the kids on The Pit read the crap and putting that up just draws them like flies to shit).
Massive authors notes are another thing that make me want to beat people with something that causes an immense amount of pain. The truth? I don't read them unless I'm working in the archive or if it's an author that NEVER leaves a note, which generally conveys that it's something important I might need to take a gander at, and generally just scroll to where the story starts or leave it when the story part ends. Most of it isn't anything I need or want to know and is more BS than anything else (don't get me started on that as I've seen things like people bitching how their sister is screwing their husband and she's mad about it... no joke!). If you need a massive authors note to explain your story, plot or something in it that means you didn't write it correctly to impart those kinds of things. And if you did write it properly and someone didn't get it, it's their issue, not yours. Even worse than that is when they scream at you (via all caps) in the note or to leave a review. There is a special place in hell for these people, I swear it...