deep discussion from my intro to counseling class

[kagome26isawsome]

I wanted to share this, i would like to know what you all think of this. My teacher had us discuss this and well it was very insightful that i thought it would be perfect here:

If you significant other was in a car accident and ended up in a coma, and the dr said it would last 1-3 years, would you stay with them and why? what if it was 3-6 year coma? Mind you, your significant other has not brain damage or lost of limbs but just in a coma. Talked about this in intro to counseling, thought it would be a great discussion here! let me know...

Second part is, why would you stay or leave! getting extra credit XD

Edited January 24, 2012 by kagome2526

[Melrick]

If I truly loved her, and I knew she truly loved me, then I wouldn't care how long the coma lasted; the idea of leaving would never enter my mind, ever. True love is way too hard to find to just throw it away because of impatience.

[DemonGoddess]

When you get involved long term, that means you stick around for the bad as well as the good. Severe illness, to me, is not a reason to leave.

[BronxWench]

You heard from me last night in the forum, but to put it here as well (for that extra credit), loving someone is not something you turn off and walk away from when things get tough. At least, not for me.

Your professor stated that people require sex and/or companionship and therefore could not sustain a one-sided relationship with a loved one in a coma. Either your professor is playing devil's advocate, or is a hopeless cynic. If the latter, my deepest condolences.

[kagome26isawsome]

lol yea i had a 'omg' look on my face when he said that yesterday. Like i said he said something about human nature and something about being honest with yourself when he asked this. I can see you all are honest with your decisions to stay as i stated in class yesterday. As for me posting this as we were talking in the Sb about it, well i was trying to write down your answers but the chat went crazy so i thought this would be the best place for it so i can get my answers written down for my teacher Thanks! And i don't believe this will be the last deep discussion i will be posting here to share, seeing as it is intro to counseling, i am sure there will be more discussions like this. Don't be surprised if you see my post another one soon.

Edited January 24, 2012 by kagome2526

[ApolloImperium]

Give him this word for word "I dare you to gather a sampling of military spouses and significant others and ask this question. Watch how fast you are eaten alive. Can stress pull apart a relationship? Can weaker people falter? Absolutely. However, an outstanding majority of military significant others will stick by, thick or thin, coma, loss of limbs, PTSD, etc etc. We go for months with out sex, worrying every single day if our soldier will come back to us alive, and if he comes back alive, will he be in one piece mentally and physically? We go for weeks with out contact along with those months with out sex, yet somehow we keep our relationships alive, we stand true, don't cheat, don't give up. Because we have the most important thing of all: Love. It is that love that gives us the strength not to give into temptation to take the easy road out when the going gets tough.

While military significant others are not alone in this keeping of the faith and many women do it every day, they are a large, easily recognizable group that is representative that the strength humanity has in the face of a challenge or adversity like this. If someone can walk away from a loved one in that situation, then there was never true, deep, abiding love to begin with and the person is better off for the loss when they return from the coma."

[DemonGoddess]

Another group this would apply to, if you think about it, are spouses of police officers, and fire fighters. Imagine the kind of stress that is. My uncle is a retired cop. His wife had to deal with daily "oh gee, my husband may never come home from work because he may die". Did she run? Nope.

[ApolloImperium]

True, any type of first responder!

[Tigro Spottystripes]

For me to consider someone my significant other they would have to be ok with open relationships; it would suck if they went vegetable, but i see no reason to dump them in their absence.