JayDee's Review Reply Thread (Games)

[JayDee]

Shokan Lust has gained, well,

~Rules~

Rules for the Stratego Game

The object of the game is to capture your opponent's flag.

To Start the Game

Place the board between the players so that the name STRATEGO is facing each contestant.

One player takes the Red and the other the Blue playing pieces. Red starts first.

Each player gets an army of 40 pieces, in order of rank from high to low, consisting of these moveable pieces:

...and so it continues. So, while not technically a review, it does sound like a great game.

Shame it wasn't spell checked though - folks might want to play the game and declare they have a matshul!

[BronxWench]

Lovely. A troll.

[JayDee]

Or possibly a Stratego viral marketer. We may never know for sure.

[BronxWench]

I have this image in my head, of trolls playing Stratego. This is not a good thing.

[JayDee]

Sounds like something the billy goats came up with, to keep 'em distracted.

[JayDee]

...and with another review, Shokan Lust matches the review count of my other multi-parter, Ending the Fan! Yay!

Anon

good fic man keep going the doing sex is good

Thank you for your review!

Definitely gonna keep going - there's two more chapters to go! I'm glad the sex is good for ya and the fic, it's nice to hear

Edited October 11, 2014 by JayDee

[JayDee]

Shokan Lust

The Todd

I'm Still Reading It And Enjoying It But I Don't Usually Feel The Need To Comment Every Single Chapter Five!

Thank you for your review, firstly I'm glad you're still reading and enjoying. Means I'm getting something right with Melora84's ideas! As for every chapter, I do get that too - That's why I said thanks for all the reviews I had got, and I was hoping to maybe persuade some of the folks who kept coming back and hadn't given a comment at all to give a comment.

And while that perhaps didn't entirely work, it did get Stratego!

[shortchannel]

Delete

Edited May 22, 2021 by shortchannel

[JayDee]

Okay, duly noted!

Shokan Lust has another review,

Shortchannel

Loving it, will there ever some corporal punishment?

Thanks for the review though, glad you're loving it, and sadly, no, nothing like that planned for the last couple chapters. The closest it came to any punishment was the rimming scene - sorry!

Edited October 13, 2014 by JayDee

[JayDee]

With parts 7 and 8 up for Shokan Lust there's now only one last part to go! And with 1000 hits since part 7 in four days there's even a reviewer:

SailorNemesis

Sorry to heat it's ending, it has been a great ride. Very sexy, hope Sonya and Sheeva stay together.

Thank you, I'm glad it's been enjoyable for you. And very sexy? as a pornographer I'm happy to hear that! I'm sure Sheeva will keep her pet for life

[JayDee]

Shokan Lust

The Todd

It Was Great While It Lasted Five!

Thank you! Now, if it can just last one part more... *fingers crossed*

Edited November 25, 2014 by JayDee

[JayDee]

Shokan Lust

Anon

This was a really hot story, with good writing, attention to the story and characters, and awesome, raunchy sex. I'm not gay, so for me, the story ends here, but it was a great one, so I'm alright with losing out on that last chapter. Good work on a fun story with a criminally under-used character!

Thanks for your review, hot is good! So far as the characters have been, the original requester, Melora84 is very into MK lore and Sonya Blade in particular and gave me a lot of guidance on the chapter planning and first drafts on how to direct the character reactions and that. Like, in one part I had a quite different section of Sonya's reaction to Night Wolf which would have been out of character! This kind of thing is why they're credited for stuff every chapter. I think more Sheeva is always worth seeing, and more Sonya, too, although she does seem to get more stories! I prefer classic MK1-3 Sonya

Sorry to lose you here, but I totally understand as the main sex of the final chapter will have a lot more dick than any previous part, and extra dick is definitely not everybody's cup of meat... er... tea. (I think that might be a song lyric... eep) Especially after 8 parts of F/F, of course.

And to anybody else looking in here: The final part is started on!

Edited November 29, 2014 by JayDee

[JayDee]

Shokan Lust

Anon

i really enjoyed this story, i wont be reading last chapter but everything else has been pretty great, i hope you do more f/f stuff in future

Thank you, I haven't done a lot of F/F (the two flashfic oneshots for Half Life and Left 4 Dead 2 were probably my best previous efforts) so it's nice that this one has been enjoyable - I put a lot of it down to the extra characterisation tips the requester gave me, and where they pointed out extra detail was needed so I added more. I'd like to do more F/F at some point, though it may be a while.

Totally understand why the last chapter doesn't appeal to everyone

Edited December 4, 2014 by JayDee

[JayDee]

Shokan Lust

WildVixen18

I love your story. I can't wait for the next chapter to be up.

That's really nice to hear, thank you, I am glad you love it. I've written the first 2500 words or so of the last part, but I keep running out of time to do more! Fingers crossed it won't be long though.

[JayDee]

And so, Shokan Lust is finished. Complete. Done with. No more MK fanfic for a while. Big break needed! ~40000 words.... that is a lot for me. It's not even PWP. There's P rather than just P. As it were. Anyway, it'd be nice to get lots and lots of reviews, but I am realistic. I'm hoping for just two more. Maybe. Here's one:

Anon

I like that the last secene was her pleasuring Sindel, wish we could have had more detail of that Sindel's almost as hot as Sheeva

Thank you for your comment - Ahh, but if there had been more detail then it would have had to be part 10 rather than the epilogue! I actually had pretty much no detail about it, beside the hair stroke, and Melora84 suggested putting some in, making the point that it would show Sheeva's ok with Sonya doing that stuff. It was a good point, so I wrote the extra stuff. Maybe someone else'll do a full Sheeva / Sindel scene sometime?

[JayDee]

Shokan Lust

SailorNemesis

Great story, sorry to see it end. Enjoyed most of it, though it got a bit too gory at times. Hope to see more like this someday

Thank you! And thanks for your support throughout. I do get where you're coming from with the violence and blood, but for once it was necessary to the story I think that Mortal Kombat's status as one of the most violent game series' of the early nineties probably also gives a little leeway. Maybe? Ahh well. I don't think I'll be returning to the Shokan Lust 'verse myself, but it'd be nice to write something to this level again. Or at least, more fisting.

[JayDee]

Shokan Lust

derpington83

Awesome stuff dude. I've always found sheeva sexy

Thank you! And thanks also for my first review of 2015. Possibly also my last review Some might say Sheeva's an aquired taste, but I totally get where the sexiness comes in. Glad ya liked it.

[JayDee]

Phytoerotic Asphyxiation is the result of me mocking my muse for not coming up with porn. I'm working on another, longer, original, story with porn in the middle. Took a break for this.

Got some reviews! And 290 hits! and the shock realisation that one extra dot is needed for the subject ellipsis!

BronxWench
::carefully moves all the plants outside::

Back to the prompts with a bang, or perhaps a bump? A nicely twisted take on the prompt words, and a wonderful lesson on the risks inherent in any grab for power. After all, there's always another piranha higher up on the ladder and waiting for a snack. Wonderfully done, and I wasn't even overly squicked by the WS!

Thanks for your review, BW! WS never bothers me, but then I've had cheap wine from the less salubrious stores in Kentucky. Bit of a palate cleanser really after that. Yeah, Bowser's gonna get both Kingdoms! He's one smart lizard. Except, possibly, for getting caught every time. Of course Zelda'll steal both kingoms off him by being secretly even more evil. Maybe.

DemonGoddess061
As usual JayDee, you did not disappoint! Good writing, even if it was creepy!

Thanks DG! I do sometimes feel a little bad about y'all staff having to read the creepy shit. At least it's short and not too painfully constructed in terms of writing. I'll probably re-read it in a month and see a horrible clanger in syntax.

Anon
Could feel my stomach twist as I read this. Damn creepy stuff. Kudos for taking on the challenge.

Thanks Anon! Yeah, it's definately not a vanilla fic, s'why I left my bigger disclaimer and codes at the top of the page which I didn't do for most of the previous prompt fics I did. Wanted to give folks a chance to turn back. Good of you to check it through though and leave a comment - 290 hits and 3 reviews isn't a bad ratio for me!

Thanks again all.

Edited May 18, 2015 by JayDee

[BronxWench]

Actually, I like creepy stories. You're quite good at them, too.

[JayDee]

Thanks! I probably oughta do more. But, you know, lazy muse...

[DemonGoddess]

Creepy is of the good, always!

[JayDee]

Always good in fiction! Less good when hitchhiking.

[JayDee]

Phytoerotic Asphyxiation

NecroNOMNOMicon
Awesome story! What a unique spin on autoerotic asphyxiation. I haven't played any game related to Mario Bros in decades, and I had no idea of the relationship between Daisy and Peach or the abilities of the Piranha Plant, but this was still easy to follow. As for the kinky stuff... well, JayDee never disappoints. In addition to classic snuff we get watersports! I guess that sort of thing is to be expected in a universe where the heroes are plumbers running through pipes!

Thanks for your review! The last Mario game I played was Super Mario 64 which, goddamn, is getting on for 20 years old. That makes me feel kind've old.

Daisy was created for the Game Boy game, Super Mario Land and she's basically kicked around in various of the other games ever since. Guess Luigi needed a Princess to date too! Piranha Plants probably can't do that, but I figured anybody picking up on the canon would be more concerned about the whole "Peach-using-Daisy-as-a-toilet-and-killing-her" thing I'm glad that you liked it, and thanks again for the review!

[NecroNOMNOMicon]

Besides providing some entertainment with your Daisy story, JayDee, you've also inspired me to try my hand at that same challenge -- although my story is very, very (VERY) different from what you came up with. Not the same at all...

[JayDee]

Is it going to be... romance?