Ever feel like apologizing for a story?

[megadeth425]

I'm the first one to admit that I write, the vast majority of the time, what is little more than smut. Sometimes I'll get a lovey-dovey, fluffy one-on-one piece that seems sort of romantic, but then I have all these "Wham bam thank you mam" moresome fics that run the complete oposite direction.

However, earlier today I was hit with an idea, and I began writing. The end result is a story featuring impregnantion, slavery, lactation, and a whole bunch of things I'd never even brushed on in my previous work. By no means was my stuff vanilla before; not at all. Still, though, after having uploaded it to the site and giving it a read out of my "comb it for fuck-ups" mode, I almost feel ashamed for having written it. It delved into things I never touched on for a pretty good reason, but the inspiration hit me and I wrote without giving it a thought.

Has anyone else ever written something and then almost felt the need to apologise for the content within?

[marley_station]

I'm the first one to admit that I write, the vast majority of the time, what is little more than smut. Sometimes I'll get a lovey-dovey, fluffy one-on-one piece that seems sort of romantic, but then I have all these "Wham bam thank you mam" moresome fics that run the complete oposite direction.

However, earlier today I was hit with an idea, and I began writing. The end result is a story featuring impregnantion, slavery, lactation, and a whole bunch of things I'd never even brushed on in my previous work. By no means was my stuff vanilla before; not at all. Still, though, after having uploaded it to the site and giving it a read out of my "comb it for fuck-ups" mode, I almost feel ashamed for having written it. It delved into things I never touched on for a pretty good reason, but the inspiration hit me and I wrote without giving it a thought.

Has anyone else ever written something and then almost felt the need to apologise for the content within?

What's your problem with the story? You definitely posted it in the proper forum.

I am amused when people post stories on this site and disclaim them and then apologize for their content. If you didn't think this was the appropriate place to publish a fic of that nature you would not have bothered; therefore, why on earth are you apologizing? The people who browse this site come from all walks of life, and have all sorts of kinks. Trust me, for every three people you offend, ten people are getting off on what you've written, even if the number of hits or reviews you get don't tell you so.

Here is my advice to you. If you're experiencing a moral conflict over what you've written, then don't publish your work in public forums until you are no longer experiencing moral conflict. Honestly, we just want to read what you've written. We could care less if you're having an issue with it.

Post the next chapter or take it down. Either way, PLEASE STOP APOLOGIZING.

[megadeth425]

It's not a matter of moral conflict or a problem with the content. It just feels a little off, like my writing sort of jumped the shark. I like the story, and by all means I uploaded it knowing full well it was something I felt was worth publishing. The point of this topic was merely asking if anyone's ever looked at a story they've written and felt sort of off abut the fact they wrote it. Maybe "apologize" is the wrong word for it, and my story has no such claims of apology in it. It's merely a personal reflection of the end result, a wonder as to what exactly prompted you to write a story so outside of what you do and know, and then looking it over with surprise.By no means am I taking the story down, and at no point in the author's note at the beginning do I express any shame for writing it, it's merely a personal realisation that I wrote something with that subject matter. It's deeper than not wanting to offend someone, it's a question about the relationship between someone and their creation. My first post was probably a little vague in that respect, though.

[marley_station]

It's not a matter of moral conflict or a problem with the content. It just feels a little off, like my writing sort of jumped the shark. I like the story, and by all means I uploaded it knowing full well it was something I felt was worth publishing. The point of this topic was merely asking if anyone's ever looked at a story they've written and felt sort of off abut the fact they wrote it. Maybe "apologize" is the wrong word for it, and my story has no such claims of apology in it. It's merely a personal reflection of the end result, a wonder as to what exactly prompted you to write a story so outside of what you do and know, and then looking it over with surprise.By no means am I taking the story down, and at no point in the author's note at the beginning do I express any shame for writing it, it's merely a personal realisation that I wrote something with that subject matter. It's deeper than not wanting to offend someone, it's a question about the relationship between someone and their creation. My first post was probably a little vague in that respect, though.

Well I'm glad I was able to help you clarify your feelings. When you talk about the relationship between someone and their creation I can definitely identify with you.

I think it's safe to say that we are all our own worst critics. It seems to me that you've ventured into uncharted territory with this new fic, and as the writer are experiencing some apprehension. That's to be expected. Your reaction will likely be the strongest one to what you've written. Once you've gotten over it (and you will), you'll be fine and more than ready to take on the reader response to what you've published.

Fret not. You are evolving as a creative person, and as a writer. You are in very good company here.

[Supersonic Bitch]

Due to serious sleep deprivation I was only able to concentrate on the headline. As I am still not able to sleep (fuck, I should at least sometimes care about the fact that dexamphetamine's effects last so much longer than regular speed's), I so feel that it's AIMLESS RAMBLING TIME!!!!111fukkeneleven!!1

This far I have never felt like apologizing for any stories of mine. I write proper warnings, so if there is something that a possible reader considers disgusting, they are able to check it out before. If. You. Are. Squicked. By. A. Story. Idea, Don't. Fucking. Read. It.

In my not so humble opinion, only reasons where writer should apologize are:

1. Failure with enticements warnings. Readers should be able to know enough about what there will be. For example if I'm searching for some beautifully decadent consensual Lucius/Draco, I really don't want to end up confronting a story about an OOC Lucius raping redeemed!Draco who then marries Harry and has ten ass-babies for him. I'm here for the pr0n, not for being violently sick due to the content.

Of course there is also a rather big problem with accurate warnings. They may give the plot away and I am pretty sure that there are a) lots of readers who want to be surprised and lots of writers who want to surprise the readers. Twists, turns and devious plots are love.

2. Plagiarism. Including copying other person's story enough and for example using another writer's own ideas (like devices, spells and so on) without giving them credit for their ideas. Actually I'm very adamant in my opinion that you should ask from the writer if it's okay to use them.

[Velvet D Coolette]

Personally, I've only ever once felt any need to apologise for a fanfic, and that was my first ever attempt. Even then it was only after I'd written several more stories, gotten good at it and then went back and read the first one. I said 'sorry, I don't like this one as it is any more, I'll rewrite it then put it back up', and I haven't yet, which again, makes me feel apologetic because there are people asking for the subsequent stories to be put back up, which I took down also.

But apart from that, not at all. If it's got the right warnings on it, then you're warned. There is a writer in The Pit who keeps on apologising for his rather grim/emo work but keeps on posting it anyway, and seems to ignore concrit. He's the kind that gets on my nerves: if you feel the need to apologise, ask yourself why and fucking put it right!

[/rant]

[jlori10]

Yeah, I get exactly where you're coming from. I wrote a side story to my largest original story and it was pretty rough compared to what I normally do. I'm normally more about the warm and fuzzy feelings. Don't get me wrong, my readers say that I'm evil because I like to put my characters through some really terrible things. Still, the short story I mentioned was just horrible. I felt it gave the readers a chance to get some background on a character in my main story though. But adding that to the story itself would have raised the ratings and required a zillion codes, so I kept it separate. Not that I felt the need to apologize for it or anything. It was worth reading, just fairly graphic. It allowed my regular readers to decide for themselves whether or not they wanted to be exposed to that type of content without turning people off of the whole story.

[WarlordEnfilade]

I don't think you should have to apologize for your stories if they are posted in the proper place for the proper audience with the proper disclaimers. Adultfanfiction.net is the proper place for something that kinky. Now, if you're shoving it in the face of someone uninterested (or underage) or posting it in a public forum like fanfiction.net or not disclaiming it properly so those who are squicked can avoid it, THEN you should be apologizing.

The only thing I ever worry about is if I have cleaned up my stories' content enough to make them appropriate for fanfiction.net's M rating, or whether I've censored them too much and lost important parts. I have one upcoming that I swear I will never be able to post on fanfiction.net, or if I do, I'll have to stop it halfway through over there.

[Guest oskalaboska]

Fiction wise, I've never felt the need to apologize.

[Tempestuous]

If there was anything to apologize for... it'd be my old mary sues. You know, back in the day when you were 13 and you stumble upon these intriguing sites filled with fanfiction, horribly written and total wish-fulfillment but you love it anyway? The moment I decided "Hey, I can totally write with shitty grammar and spelling! And I can come up with some superwoman character! Ooooh, and abusive pasts, yesss!" and you end up having a story with a character so utterly typical. (And by typical, I mean there's bath tubs that are deeper than the character.) Then when you look back at it when you're nearing 19 years of age and just feel the need to go back in time and hit your younger self over the head for being such a douche.

Yep, that's me. Then I deleted my old accounts and said goodbye to allll my mary sue brainfarts.

Other than that... Nope, I am shameless with my writing!

[MorbidFantasy]

a simple disclaimer in your profile stating that you don't endorse the real world application of the content in your fics will suffice.

The line everyone should take with the internet is to think twice before you post, but once you do never look back and for god's sake don't abuse the edit button.

You don't see videogame and movie producers apologizing for the body count that they rack up on screen now do you? So to answer your question directly: no you shouldn't have to apologize. Nor should you need to feel guilty about posting something riske or deviant online.

[Xenobia]

I feel like apologizing for every damned LOTR story I ever wrote, actually. I only leave them up to make fun of myself and to serve as a reminder when I'm feeling insecure that I've improved since cutting my teeth on that fandom. I did recently feel like apologizing for a chapter I wrote, only because I thought I made the love scene a bit too corny.

I think most people have these moments. Admitting our work has flaws helps us to improve and I think if the time comes when a person feels there's no more room for improvement, it's time for them to call it quits. I have never seen an author, published or not, write a completely perfect tale. There is no such thing as a story completely mistake free-whether it's a sentence with too much wordiness, a grammatical error overlooked before publishing, a clumsy description or confusing dialog. I've never read a book that didn't have at least a small handful of flaws in it.

[jungledrums]

Never apologise for your art. Just spelling and grammical errors.

[Guest dwitefry]

I have spent two hours writing something and having re-read apologised to every form of deity I can think of, for the quality of the dialogue, for being totally unenthralling or for just being ill-concieved, luckily I never publish such things. In fact i usually just delete thier worthless' asses and sob gentley...

MeX

[Need2ScreamNow]

I can relate to the feeling of stepping outside your comfort zone. I have a couple stories that I wrote that made me reconsider what I was doing, but once you get comfortable writing with that content or style it opens you up to explore even more things. Honestly, the first time I wrote a sex scene I was so uncomfortable with it, it took me three days to write half a page. Once you get past that initial, "Eh, I don't know" phase you can improve your writing on the content and introduce your own style to it. This site is great because the readers are so diverse you can experiment with any style or content and there's someone out there willing and wanting to read it.

[Windrider Shiva]

Apologizing for a story... that I posted? No, not really. I've had a couple bad rewiews for the ending of my first finished OC story, but I'm not apologizing for that one; the ending was planned from the very very start of it. Couldn't see it ending any other way possible (well I could, but it didn't feel right to me).

That I HAVEN'T posted? I have a lot, especially back when I was discovering fanfiction and was writing - like a bunch of 14-year-old girls did at that time - some totally OOC Final Fantasy 7 fanfiction. In my head, back then, it was the most awesome piece of fiction ever written. The ideas were so vivid. 12 years later, I look back at that stuff, shake my head, curse myself, and thank heavens I wasn't even able to post them anywhere. Maybe I'll do that for my current stuff, in another 12 years.

Actually I have one, that I've posted on ff.net... if I had been serious about it (I wasn't, it was meant to be a bad parody) I'd be apologizing for.

[kickback]

Nope, never have. At least I haven't been serious, more of a 'Yeah, this is probably corny and/or cliche... but I don't care! MA-HA!' or 'it was such an odd idea that I had to do it' kind of thing. If people take them too seriously then it's not really my problem.

Some things that happen to be flat out entertaining are a bit cliche, but still have their own flare that makes them unique regardless.

[And Your Little Dog Too]

Absolutely yes. Last year, I had a long period of writer's block, a weird case where the same image entered my head and everything I tried to write was a reflection of that image. This lasted for months and months. Eventually, I went all out and wrote it up in the most contrived and purple fashion I could muster. When I posted it on FF.net, the whole subject line was an apology. Got good reviews, though.

My greatest guilty pleasure is finding stories like one you describe, where the inspiration just "hits" and you write it all out and post it and then say, "What the hell? Where did that come from?" I love those moments where the muse does an end-run around the internal editors and says, "Write this! Now! Before they put me back in my cage!" Stories like that are secret windows into the soul, where normal logic no longer applies. Perhaps there's something in your soul that secretly gets off on lactation and slavery. More likely, there's something in your id that hates being told what to do and how to feel, and tells your ego/superego to go screw themselves and all their "pretty good reasons."

Edited March 18, 2011 by TangoKilo421

[kagome26isawsome]

Yes, one of my recent stories. Its the family guy one i wrote about Glenn meeting his daughter after they slept together. I dont really condone incest, but it just hit me. I love to write, but i dont know about this one. Im just waiting for the flames to start.

[JayDee]

I probably ought too. Huh.

[Anesor]

I don't quite see the point of writing an apology when you post it. I have trouble posting often, but I've only gotten a few mean responses or people who thought it was too dark. It only bothers me if I have doubts about the issue they talk about. If they complain about some things, I only laugh.

I think putting an apology at the start of a story is a no win scenario:

Many readers will believe the apology or guess there are more problems and won't read...

OR if they read and the apology is correct, they kick themselves for wasting time...

OR if they read and the apology is wrong, or VERY wrong, they are annoyed that it's wrong don't think as much of the author to apologize when not needed...

While I'm not that confident, I think posting a story if it is all TOS correct, especially here, falls under the saying "Do it! It's easier to get forgiveness than permission." The story is it's own art, and if I've done the best job I can, I should not apologize for my 'child' before someone meets him/her. The kid would feel pissed too.

[marley_station]

I don't quite see the point of writing an apology when you post it. I have trouble posting often, but I've only gotten a few mean responses or people who thought it was too dark. It only bothers me if I have doubts about the issue they talk about. If they complain about some things, I only laugh.

I think putting an apology at the start of a story is a no win scenario:

Many readers will believe the apology or guess there are more problems and won't read...

OR if they read and the apology is correct, they kick themselves for wasting time...

OR if they read and the apology is wrong, or VERY wrong, they are annoyed that it's wrong don't think as much of the author to apologize when not needed...

While I'm not that confident, I think posting a story if it is all TOS correct, especially here, falls under the saying "Do it! It's easier to get forgiveness than permission." The story is it's own art, and if I've done the best job I can, I should not apologize for my 'child' before someone meets him/her. The kid would feel pissed too.

Very well stated. Here here.

[yukihimedono]

First, I have never felt like apologizing for anything that I posted (just horribly embarrassed at my earlier work). If someone doesn't like it, I'm not bothered by that or the flame they leave behind (or the lack of reviews). One, I write for myself and two, I know that there are people out there that would and do like it. I love writing and, like my art, it helps to relieve my tension, anger, frustration, etc.

My first fanfiction site was fanfiction.net and I really loved it there, until I found AFF. Here, there's no 'line' to cross and I have no limitations on myself. I don't have to worry about some young person reading my story without them realizing that it's adult. They venture forth of their own volition. This is the perfect place to let my desires and whatnot run wild without worrying about the repercussions of some underage reader 'accidently' clicking on my story. As long as there are correct warnings on the work, then there is no need for anyone to apologize. It's the reader's choice to read something, if they don't like it, then that's their problem and it has nothing to do with you. Most people are close-minded. It's a fact.

You are on an adult fanfiction site so I feel that it's safe to post anything you write. If the readers here can't be mature then there's no reason for you to feel regret about writing something and posting it. If someone reads something that they didn't like, I see that as their problem not mine. Ultimately, and I believe this to be true for every writer, what you write is for you and not for other's to read and like or hate. You shouldn't feel neither embarrassment or ashamed because you're trying something new with your writing. The more styles you begin to experiment with, the more you will grow. And isn't that what everyone aims for? Just remember that you are on a site where there are people who will read what you write and post and will like it, so don't worry and don't apologize.

[reriddle]

Yes I completely understand the urge to apologize after having published something. Recently I decided to post a story that I had written on the fly about Hermione and Molly banging it out. When I woke up and remembered what I had done, I immediately went to delete the story.

There are some times when you should really wait until you have a sober second thought before posting.

[spiralbreeze]

This is actually happening to me about beginning a story in the first place. Someone on the forums requested a rape fic with Misty, and I got this idea to write it in a poem after I had seen "The Song of Lunch." Hearing Alan Rickman's voice of course would convince anyone they could write a brutal and garish story containing the rape of an 11 year old by a 10 year old. Thus, I have been debating it for some time now, to the point where I open a new document on Pages and chicken out. The sad thing is, it's not necessarily the content, although it probably should be, for me it's capturing the beauty of the poetry within the context of the rape. At least I think that's what I mean. When I post it, I want people to say, wow, that's beautiful, but sick.