canterro

I don't like sweetness. I don't like this 'uke' type that stares with his/her eyes full of tears, is always clumsy and can't take care of anything, reacts with hysteria, and makes me wonder why, the heck, somebody would fall in love with that, ekhem, 'thing'. For me, a story must seem real, believable (even if it's fantasy), and so must characters. I like complications, but hey, not too much. Too much spoils the thing... Well, I'd call it maturity, what I'm looking for I'm not really interested in mpreg thing, incest, and strange genitals :] Not that I'm disgusted or something, I'm just not interested (usually; if you manage to catch me with your story that involves subjects mentioned above - congratulations; you're a magician ).

I found something about acids in Permian lakes: http://www.nature.com/nature/journal/v392/...s/392911a0.html And this: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dimethyl_sulfide well, I thought about dividing air into light/sound/wind it find it quite poetic

of course; I'm just saying that imagining reaction is more difficult and if your description fails, the most usual problem is that you can't describe the reaction properly and believably

Chapter 25 is ready Enjoy and review!

why sticking to gas/liquid/solid division? fire can be illustrated as sparks, flames (that's gas, actually), lava (oh, that's liquid )... earth can be divided in sand or soil, crystal, metal/ oil / natural gas ... air - well, four winds like zephir and so on...

yeeeeah... as immodest as I am, I dare to say that you might like my "The Jigsaw". Of course, you might not, as well, but then I'd appreciate the critical review

I think what you should focus on is not the action, but REaction. It's not that difficult to imagine what you'd like to do, as you can do almost anything you imagine (in writing, of course), but it's the reaction of the person who receives what you do that matters This is what you have to imagine properly. Everyone has to adjust, there might be some mess, some pain, some awkwardness... You have to consider all this

Yep, that's what I think too The name is too sweet, fluffy and so. Change it to something more, ekhem, meaningless :]

Well, if you're a virgin, imagination can be a bad advisor. It tends to make things smooth and just not real. Read about the physiology, read some papers on sex (and I mean serious papers), watch some movies, I don't know - talk to people who actually have sex experiences And... write. People will judge you. Every try is gonna be better then the previous one Of course, some readers are just as inexperienced as you are. But still, we improve by doing things (writing, in this case), not just reading about them

That was quick... The next chapter is ready. I count on your reviews! Have a nice reading

I'm not a good beta, as I'm not a native speaker I use help of my beta-reader all the time... It's quite difficult to find a good one, well, to find one at all, but keep trying. It took me quite a long time to start a solid cooperation. Keep answering to posts in the thread where betas leave their offers... Eventually it'll work And about small audience - it grows with time Do not be discouraged - practice makes a master

Yeah, you can watch and use your imagination If you're a virgin, the rule 'think real' still applies Just don't make it sweet and not physical. Sometimes the scene does include fluids, surprising body reaction and everything feels like heaven even if it's the first time. It's obvious that the first time is awkward, full of stress, sometimes painful, and not very nice. Sex is an art and you have to master skills to be able to make it feel like heaven You can also send your descriptions to some betas or other authors to judge if you're taking a good direction

I left a review at your story's site Are you a native English speaker? Whatever your answer is, it's still not a bad idea to get a beta-reader. I know it as I work with one - a perfect cooperator. They can find your small mistakes and help to format the text It's worth trying, if you haven't done it yet, especially that some betas have lots of experience and can give a very valuable feedback Good luck, I'm waiting for continuation!

Well, another thing is - THINK REAL Do not describe some cosmic reactions or experiences. Sex is a human thing, people do that quite often and can judge if you stay more or less true. Think about what you do while having sex, think of what happens in reality, not in a pink-creamy-fantasy-smooth passion stories shot into space, which neglect dirt, awkwardness, pain, confusion, lack of practice and so on

Woooo! I thought this topic was dead... I'm so thrilled you took up this challenge. I can't wait to read your story Keep on going, please, please... ! Let me know when you upload, ok?

It's been some time, but now chapter 23 is available And I can promise you - it's hooooot! Enjoy and share your impressions with me

And the next chapter is available Enjoy and review

Hello! It's been a loooong, difficult time but here I am again - writing Thus, the next chapter (22) is waiting for you and begging for your attention and reviews... Enjoy!

I announce chapter 10 ready and waiting for you judgment

it's been a long time again, but the 9th chapter is ready! Please, support me with your reviews I need them. It's very hard now to write, as my job's giving me hell... I appreciate all signs of your existence and interest!

The next chapter, "Heaven and Hell", is waiting humbly for you time and judgment So do I. Please, give it a chance and give me a chance to know your opinion. I appreciate all kinds of feedback!

It's been a looong time... But finally - the next chapter, 19th, is available! Enjoy

okay, after a long time I finally managed to complete the next chapter. enjoy!

wisdom spoke through your words I rarely read fanfiction and this is mainly because authors rarely stay faithful to original characters.

um, I don't know if anyone will read this, but still... I didn't abandon The Broken Road. Not at all. I just have a tough month so writing is going on slowly. However, I've completed like 2/3 of the next chapter so I'll make an update in one week or so. At least this is what I hope for See you soon!