I am disgusted.
I am listening to the Nightwish cover of Over The Hills and Far Away.
I am having flashbacks to Firefly as the singer keeps saying "As long as the reavers reach the sea."
I'm closer to slob. And yes my furniture is pretty good, although all I have is a table, bed, desk and futon/couch and they're usually in use.
I have never owned a hand vacuum.