InvidiaRed

From InBrightestDay on November 14, 2023 Ok, missed a few days, but this will probably be the chapter after which I pause to work on my holiday story. Anyway, this is listed as Chapter 4, but I think it was actually the third holiday story, so I'm doing it now. Tricked I'd kind of forgotten what your version of Lucifer is like. There's archvillain Lucifer, roguish charismatic Lucifer...and then there's, like, used car salesman Lucifer. This one isn't quite used car salesman Lucifer...but considering the bit where he eats his son and doesn't notice until Mic points it out, he's not far off. Car Salesman playing checkers in a world of 3rd chess. One thing I didn't notice the first time around, or maybe it was added later, was the focus on the HD cameras at the casino. I'd assumed in Death Always Wins that either the gods would have accounted for that or that, similar to vampires, they wouldn't show up on camera. Maybe you can only record magic at 1080p. The conflux of halloween made it inevitable that eventually it would be too big to cover up, this was buried but this was a PR nightmare on steroids. Just imagine it leaking to social media or youtube. This story does begin introducing lore about the world (regarding suggestions of untamed regions of the underworld and such), though none of it pays off yet. There is also a hint of a bigger story arc, which I'm going to keep an eye on to see if it comes back. Also I'd forgotten this but Logan is a kinky dude! It was pretty funny when he got all enthusiastic and mentioned see-through pants he was going to have Duncan wear. Yes, the ancient god will cross the United States in dignified fashion… If it makes his hubby happy that all that matters at least as far as it concerns Duncan, Clothing can be considered optional for the divine. Good luck trying to impose societal standards on literal gods at most you’ll be mocked with derision best case. Worst case smitten for the sheer hubris. The ones who bother with humanity regularly understand it.

Jötunheimr Christmas The world descends towards apocalyptic with the betrayal of the global pantheon Yet The Beast Of The Sea revels in assignation and the world serpent remit Beyond Ífingr, the river that never freezes, An elder deity is never truly idle.

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From InBrightestDay on November 11, 2023 Temporary "You'd think evolution would tame that panic button. Alas," Duncan lamented. weeeell if evolution had removed the fear response, we'd probably be extinct by now, so Duncan can find it annoying, but it's probably here to stay. When you’ve at it from before the ice age started, he’s outlasted all others while also being the first gods to come to earth. The primal first fires that kept the monsters at bay. The grand oversized beasts that hunted cavemen and mammoth’s he outlived them all. The cousins of what would one day be man swallowed by history. And he’s still here This story highlights something that's present in the others, I think, but that I didn't really pay much attention to, and that's Duncan's... I don't know exactly what to call it. His callousness, maybe his cynicism? The latter is probably the most correct. Either because of how long he's been doing this job or because of specific experiences, he seems to have negative thoughts about most things. I'm writing this on my phone, so I can't go back and snag another quote easily, but his reaction to the beginnings of the Black Death in particular struck me, irritation about human contributions to the explosion of the rat population, and then washing his hands of the whole thing (granted, as a psychopomp he may have a very blasé attitude regarding death, which could make him look indifferent to human suffering). Indeed while dark gods did contribute to the horror and chaos it was mongols and other armies lobbing corpses into cities as city killing weapons that really soured his attitude. Bad on its own but willfully making more work does not make a happy death god. The only positive feelings he does seem to have are when he interacts with Logan, which indicates the importance of his husband to him. I think this may also be the first part of this series where we got the idea that Duncan has been several death gods throughout history, which obviously will become very important later.

From InBrightestDay on November 11, 2023 Well, I should probably be working on my holiday story right now, but why do that when I can procrastinate? Hey, look, you assembled all the Duncan stuff; let me review some of that! Powdered Sugar So, this is mostly the same story that found its way into one of the holiday anthologies, but I do think you've changed it somewhat. Aside from a more prolonged confrontation with Odin (where I think Logan might have tried to shoot him, though I may have mixed up who did what there), there is now a brush with death...well, you know what I mean. Technically I think he's more like Death's assistant, but Mesopotamian mythology is a blind spot for me, so I'm not sure. During the conversation with Namtar, there's mention of something that happened at a casino, so perhaps this is a reference to Death Always Wins. There is a mention that something messed up some work Duncan was doing, which feels like a plot thread. I'm going to try not to guess what the plot threads are right now, because there is a lot of this story ahead. I'll see how it plays out as we go! Spoilers ;D Indeed, what was Duncan doing? Hahaha!

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42949! To the red dawn and world ending!

42943 knowledge is knowing that which you’ve denied.

42941 For to be even is to not be odd or was it visa versa?

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He was blind to the true danger she truly represented, Being as immortal as long as civilization endured he was absolutely banking on there was nothing she could do that would matter, His first temple suffused with his power was as immortal as he was. There was no attempt at resisting, no attempt to miracle. What he hadn’t counted on (if the first time we met Berta was at her worst, This time we get to see her at her apex, her absolute zenith) One of the strongest mages to ever grace that world and capable of blurring the edge of what mortals can achieve. Three different gods, two of which are two entirely different generations long at war Monster Deities and Ever-Sheltering, And the first crossover… She called out and Duncan answered. Polis was such a resolute bastard that warring gods and existence all agreed that everything within that boundary didn’t. For crimes against life itself he was thrown outside that universe. That temple and Polis himself experienced a sudden lack of existence. Not dead, just gone. Cast into a null space. Probably colliding with Amphisbaena

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Posting it early to give everyone as much time as possible ❤️

42917!

The Longest Night! Where Winter’s grasp its tightest, the frost is the most ravaging, that saps the warmth and life from all so foolish to ventured forth. But for all its death cold, and the howling winds and the nameless things that lurk within the icy grip. For it is winter that allows the earth to lay in fallow slumber to be greeted by the first rays of rising dawn, The end of the old must in turn make way for the new. The promise of dew, and the welcoming excoriating rain of renewal to chip away at what was, so that which is may take those first burgeoning steps. enjoy the eggnog with Krampus in the corner as even the long night must give way to day! Celebrate with both old and new, party with the forgotten and praise the coming day. At dawn, Look to the East! The rules are thus in our heartfelt offerings! Tags at the top of the story Holiday theme Original Fiction Oneshot 45k word limitation! You can find the stories here!

From InBrightestDay on October 29, 2023 Beyond the Monster Isles Well...it's been a while, hasn't it? Figured even if I don't contribute, I should review both of these by Halloween, so I'll start with yours! Warning, this review will contain SPOILERS This one doesn't feel particularly Halloween-themed, but the story itself is pretty cool nonetheless. It kind of reminds me of some of Robert E. Howard's Conan stories, though it's hard to say why beyond a sort of feeling: something about the tone and the harshness of the fantasy world. That actually ties into something I found myself pleasantly surprised by. When Berta's husbands are first mentioned, the way they were talked about felt a little callous, a bit "Well, they should have listened..." It reinforced that feel of the world, of course, and it was clear that Berta misses her first husband at least, but it felt a little unpleasant. fantastical worlds are,monsters are real, quantifiable and objectively true. Taking risks has a far higher chance of dismemberment and or death (massively unacceptable in the modern paradigm actually) In a fantastical world where gods and monsters are real, front and center and real it is callous… from a modern perspective. Death is abundant and when your spouse is one of the few mortals that can actually use magic at all, They took the risk and lost. Its only later, That Polis in his own overconfidence tell her that it wasn’t a risk at all. So needless to say when the old man (Polis?) decides to dunk on them some more and Berta's like "Oh, don't you say SHIT about my husbands!" that was a very nice turn of events. It’s one thing to dunk on the risk losing dead, But altogether another when you proudly admit to the sorceress’s face that you personally strangled her stillborn child and that you think its an achievement. As for the story itself, I feel it's evidence of your continued improvement as an author. A problem that some of your other stories faced was that the shorts would feel like they were part of a much larger story we didn't have, and moreover that they were difficult to understand without the broader context, the feeling of "This story is assuming I've read something else already..." Beyond the Monster Isles feels far more readily accessible and self-contained. It does venture a bit into that territory with some of the stuff on the island (not sure what was up with the piranha visions or the thing that picks up Berta when she dies), but overall the story felt like it generally told me what I needed to know, and what was out of focus didn't need to be in focus. Temporal Slippage actually, Berta is witnessing snippets of herself from the doomed timeline. All in all, nicely done! There's also some really cool visual imagery, especially the bit where the ship gets lifted into the air and then disintegrated. Berta all told is probably the most powerful mortal character I’ve ever written, She doesn’t need a focus, is capable of multiple spells at once, dunked an angel to the ocean’s bottom. And despite all that, her at the apex of mortal capability. (Which by itself puts her in class far beyond HP and Dresden) The most she had done was displace the angel. The angel took it’s task literally but being blinded by both depth and darkness, It overcharged the effect and instead of teleporting the boat with its assumption. It’s effect stripped the boat bare at an atomic level. The patriarch in question was rewarded not with his prize but dust, and tons of seawater.

From InBrightestDay on October 29, 2023 Beyond the Monster Isles Well...it's been a while, hasn't it? Figured even if I don't contribute, I should review both of these by Halloween, so I'll start with yours! It is always a treat, and always a pleasure. Warning, this review will contain SPOILERS This one doesn't feel particularly Halloween-themed, but the story itself is pretty cool nonetheless. It kind of reminds me of some of Robert E. Howard's Conan stories, though it's hard to say why beyond a sort of feeling: something about the tone and the harshness of the fantasy world. That actually ties into something I found myself pleasantly surprised by. When Berta's husbands are first mentioned, the way they were talked about felt a little callous, a bit "Well, they should have listened..." It reinforced that feel of the world, of course, and it was clear that Berta misses her first husband at least, but it felt a little unpleasant. I think what is most fascinating is… that’s who’ve I’ve started reading. So needless to say when the old man (Polis?) decides to dunk on them some more and Berta's like "Oh, don't you say SHIT about my husbands!" that was a very nice turn of events. She was trying to deescalate right up until he had the audacity to speak the name of her child that she told no one. That was the exact heartbeat, he had to go. As for the story itself, I feel it's evidence of your continued improvement as an author. A problem that some of your other stories faced was that the shorts would feel like they were part of a much larger story we didn't have, and moreover that they were difficult to understand without the broader context, the feeling of "This story is assuming I've read something else already..." I always strive to improve, well that and getting an actual map for the book lol. Beyond the Monster Isles feels far more readily accessible and self-contained. It does venture a bit into that territory with some of the stuff on the island (not sure what was up with the piranha visions or the thing that picks up Berta when she dies), but overall the story felt like it generally told me what I needed to know, and what was out of focus didn't need to be in focus. There's also some really cool visual imagery, especially the bit where the ship gets lifted into the air and then disintegrated. All in all, nicely done! Thank you. I’ll go more in detail in my own thread.

From GeorgeGlass on October 30, 2023 "Beyond the Monster Isles" by InvidiaRed Wildly imaginative, as I've come to expect from IR. Some of the punctuation and capitalization is a bit random, which slowed my reading down a little, but the characters are inventive (I particularly liked the dwarven sea captain), and the ending is satisfying. Indeed! Very randy but his honor is beyond question. A privateer versus angel could only go one way.

From GeorgeGlass on October 30, 2023 "Beyond the Monster Isles" by InvidiaRed Wildly imaginative, as I've come to expect from IR. Some of the punctuation and capitalization is a bit random, which slowed my reading down a little, but the characters are inventive (I particularly liked the dwarven sea captain), and the ending is satisfying. Indeed! Very randy but his honor is beyond question.

42897! behold the sacred seven. The prime and indivisible

42891! Onwards ye black crusade!!

42885! Behold odd once more!