Review responses for "Enter the Sandboy"

[GeorgeGlass]

This is where I’ll post replies to any reviews that my Loud House story “Enter the Sandboy” may garner. 

[Guest Star Wars player 1]

Hi, it’s me, I just wanted to say hi and let you know that I have just read the first chapter of your new Loud House story ‘Enter the Sandboy’ and I really liked it, I think that it was a great starting chapter for this new story  Anyway, hope you’re doing well, good luck with your stories and hope to hear from you again soon, bye and have a good night.

[GeorgeGlass]

19 hours ago, Guest Star Wars player 1 said:

Hi, it’s me, I just wanted to say hi and let you know that I have just read the first chapter of your new Loud House story ‘Enter the Sandboy’ and I really liked it, I think that it was a great starting chapter for this new story  Anyway, hope you’re doing well, good luck with your stories and hope to hear from you again soon, bye and have a good night.

Thanks! Glad you liked it, and I hope you’ll like the upcoming chapters, too.

[GeorgeGlass]

From Sithlordshades on August 09, 2019

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Love your work, have read everything you have up so far.  Good start to what I am sure will be a good fic.  

Thank you!

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Just wish there was a way to see when you update your other works without have to scroll through them all.

If you follow my Transparency Thread here in the forums, I usually make an announcement there whenever I post a new story or chapter.

[GeorgeGlass]

From ConanEdogawa on August 09, 2019

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I really love where this is going what sister will Lincoln be making love to?

Here’s a hint: Each chapter ends with the title of the next chapter, and the chapter title always contains a clue about which character(s) will be featured in that chapter. 

[GeorgeGlass]

From Fairy-Slayer on August 13, 2019

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(Chapter 1)

The story is off to a very fine start, with both the title and the coincidences whetting my intrigue about what may come (besides so many Loud children).

 

Coincidences? I think not.

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Also, I really like how sweet Lincoln was to care for Lana first despite his exhaustion and… uhm, needs, which made even the tease of some sultry action more intense.

Lana’s nightmare was so frightening that Lincoln couldn’t help but be sympathetic. 

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Now I was a bit surprised that it was such a short opening chapter, especially for you, yet it still sets up the scene fully and has me hooked. Thanks.

All of the chapters will be fairly short: 1500-2500 words (so I’ll be banging them out fairly quickly). This chapter is at the low end of that range because this story requires less setup than most others I’ve written. Glad it hooked you nonetheless. 

Thanks for the review!
 

 

[Guest Star Wars player 1]

Hi, it’s me I just wanted to say hi and let you know that I’ve read chapter 2 of ‘Enter the sandboy’ So this is my review for chapter 2, I hope you like it   So when I read the chapter, I thought it was really great, I liked how Lincoln is willing to help Lola with her nightmare even though he is very tired, I like that sweetness you gave home  Next, I like how he dreamt of dancing with Girl Jordan , I thought that was a really nice scene and hot as well  Next is probably the best part of the chapter, when Lincoln has fun with Lola and just thinks that he’s just dreaming, and then finally at the very end comes another one of my favorite parts of the chapter, when Lola tells Lincoln that she enjoyed the ‘other thing’ they did last night and that she would keep it a secret, and Lincoln’s reaction to her saying that was sweet and hilarious:) Anyway, So this has been my review for chapter 2 of ‘Enter the sandboy’ and I hope you like it, let me know what you think of it when you have the time, can’t wait for the next chapter as well, as well as the final chapter of ‘The More, the Merrier’ and hope to hear from you again soon, bye and have a good night                                                

[GeorgeGlass]

11 hours ago, Guest Star Wars player 1 said:

Hi, it’s me I just wanted to say hi and let you know that I’ve read chapter 2 of ‘Enter the sandboy’ So this is my review for chapter 2, I hope you like it   So when I read the chapter, I thought it was really great, I liked how Lincoln is willing to help Lola with her nightmare even though he is very tired, I like that sweetness you gave home                                 

On the show, Lincoln is fairly consistent about being a good big brother, so that seemed in-character for him. 

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Next, I like how he dreamt of dancing with Girl Jordan , I thought that was a really nice scene and hot as well  

I think Girl Jordan is really cute, so I couldn't resist.

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Next is probably the best part of the chapter, when Lincoln has fun with Lola and just thinks that he’s just dreaming, and then finally at the very end comes another one of my favorite parts of the chapter, when Lola tells Lincoln that she enjoyed the ‘other thing’ they did last night and that she would keep it a secret, and Lincoln’s reaction to her saying that was sweet and hilarious:) 

Yeah, couldn't let Lincoln get away with deluding himself like that for long.  He’s going to have to find a way to deal with all of this.

Thanks for the comments!

[GeorgeGlass]

From YamiNoKami on August 18, 2019

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Oh boy Lincoln is going to be internally freaking out for the rest day isn't he?

Not a bad bet. You'll find out for sure in the next chapter.

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So anyway what order are the sisters going to take their turns? And who will be the one to take their brother's first time? I'm dying to know.

To be revealed! But the title of the next chapter ("It Came in the Night") might give you a clue as to which sister is next.

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Also I'm curious as to what other ideas for LH stories you might have in the works. If you're willing to share them.

I'm currently working on another LH story titled "Twist My Arm." Here's a quick summary: Bobby and Ronnie Anne are in town for just 4 weeks, and Lori is determined to make the most of her time with her Boo Boo Bear. Even if she has to force Lincoln to do the same with Ronnie Anne.

Thanks for the review!

[Yami-Iko-Kami]

57 minutes ago, GeorgeGlass said:

From YamiNoKami on August 18, 2019

Not a bad bet. You'll find out for sure in the next chapter.

To be revealed! But the title of the next chapter ("It Came in the Night") might give you a clue as to which sister is next.

I'm currently working on another LH story titled "Twist My Arm." Here's a quick summary: Bobby and Ronnie Anne are in town for just 4 weeks, and Lori is determined to make the most of her time with her Boo Boo Bear. Even if she has to force Lincoln to do the same with Ronnie Anne.

Thanks for the review!

So it is Lucy. Nice, along with the twins she is one of the sisters I like to pair with Lincoln.

And “Twist My Arm” kind of reminds me of AbberrantScrpit’s Every Last Drop, a one shot in which Lori forces Lincoln to be more assertive and make her submit to him. It was due to him being such a pushover with Ronnie Anne. Really wish there was a sequel to it detailing the aftermath of Lori’s lessons.

BTW aside from Twist My Arm are you planning any other stories involving the twins or Lucy? Or maybe Sam Sharp? The last is due to Aces Wild on FF.Net.

[GeorgeGlass]

I have a bunch of other ideas for LH stories, some of which would involve the twins and/or Lucy, but none of these ideas are very well developed yet. Haven’t yet had any thoughts about Sam, but I certainly would consider including her in a story if the right idea popped up.

[GeorgeGlass]

From VaultHunter18 on August 18, 2019

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Hey George love your Loud House stories and can't wait for more.

Thanks! More is on the way.

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So nocturnal naughty dreams huh? yeah i can see that happening.

I certainly had a few when I was Lincoln's age.

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Any chance of Luna getting some time with Lincoln? At least Lucy and Lynn at the same time please? keep up the great work as always.

There are eight chapters left to go, so there's a good chance that at least some of your wishes are going to come true.

Thanks for the comments!

[GeorgeGlass]

From Fairy-Slayer on August 18, 2019

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(Chapter 2)

It's good that Lincoln finds it so easy to rationalize away his concerns, whether subconsciously or making himself believe he's doing it subconsciously. Now I have to wonder if Lana and Lola had similar subconscious machinations as well. 

 

We shall see.

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Either way, it's going to be even more fun now that Lincoln knows that it's for real, even if Lola is quite happy with his nocturnal exploits. To be fair, considering the situation he found himself & Lola in after waking up makes it really hard… to blame him for giving in to temptation.

Indeed.

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Even with the sexy fun I get the feeling that there's still more to this mystery: Lola's faceless soldiers could have a deeper meaning (even if Lana's fear was pretty direct),

Certainly, the reason for this household epidemic of nightmares remains a mystery.

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and I'm looking forward to seeing how Girl Jordan fits into Lincoln's problem… or vice versa, I suppose.

Don’t read too much into that. She's just a cute girl who, in Lincoln's mind, makes a more appropriate foolin'-around partner than one of his own sisters.

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Thanks for another fun one.

Thanks for another fun review!

[Yami-Iko-Kami]

On 8/18/2019 at 12:16 PM, GeorgeGlass said:

I have a bunch of other ideas for LH stories, some of which would involve the twins and/or Lucy, but none of these ideas are very well developed yet. Haven’t yet had any thoughts about Sam, but I certainly would consider including her in a story if the right idea popped up.

I could pitch you some ideas fro Sam if you’re interested.

[GeorgeGlass]

22 hours ago, Yami-Iko-Kami said:

I could pitch you some ideas fro Sam if you’re interested.

I can’t guarantee that I’ll do anything with them, but I’ll at least listen. Would you mind either PMing me or posting them in my Transparency thread?

[GeorgeGlass]

From YamiNoKami on August 24, 2019

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Oh boy Lincoln feels like he is in the middle of a land mine field. And Lucy is really cute in a creepy way.

That’s her shtick. And yeah, things are only going to get more confusing and awkward for Lincoln.

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And Lori is next?

 

Hmm, someone’s paying attention to the chapter titles.

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Is she going to be the one that takes Lincoln's V card?

See, the girl doesn’t actually take your V card – she just punches it. Then, if you get nine more punches, you get a free blowjob.

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That said I'm wondering if all the Loud kids are perverts at this point considering their actions so far. It makes sense given that they probably inherited it from their parents. Also are the twins going to double team Lincoln later on?

Someone is. Stay tuned!

[Guest Star Wars player 1]

Hi, it’s me, I just wanted to say hi and let you know that this is my review for chapter 3 of ‘Enter the Sandboy’, so I hope you will like it   So to start off, I love how Lincoln is freaking out about how the two dreams he had were actually real, I thought that was pretty funny  Next is the main part of the chapter, when Lucy comes in, I love how she says that she dreams of Lincoln’s funeral all the time, I thought that was funny  Next is one of my favorite parts of this chapter, when Lincoln comforts her and assures her that she has never failed her in his life, I thought that was really sweet and a great moment in the chapter. Next is the dream part, I love how he dreamed of Ronnie Anne this time, I thought that was really hot, I wonder who else he will be dreaming about in the next chapter  Next is when Lincoln has sex with Lucy, I love how he decides to just go with it, I thought that was really hot, and I thought that when Lucy revealed that Lola told her about what happened, I thought that was really funny and I like how Lucy revealed that she was the only one who was told of this. So this has been my review for chapter 3 of ‘Enter the Sandboy’, I hope you like it, and let me know what you think of it when you have the time, bye and have a nice day                                                                                                   

[GeorgeGlass]

19 hours ago, Guest Star Wars player 1 said:

Hi, it’s me, I just wanted to say hi and let you know that this is my review for chapter 3 of ‘Enter the Sandboy’, so I hope you will like it   So to start off, I love how Lincoln is freaking out about how the two dreams he had were actually real, I thought that was pretty funny  Next is the main part of the chapter, when Lucy comes in, I love how she says that she dreams of Lincoln’s funeral all the time, I thought that was funny  

I’m glad you found the humor in those bits. To me, humor is an essential part of any Loud House story because the show is chiefly a comedy.

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Next is one of my favorite parts of this chapter, when Lincoln comforts her and assures her that she has never failed her in his life, I thought that was really sweet and a great moment in the chapter.

Being a good big brother seems to be important to Lincoln. Of course, in this case, it’s part of what gets him into trouble...

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Next is the dream part, I love how he dreamed of Ronnie Anne this time, I thought that was really hot, I wonder who else he will be dreaming about in the next chapter  

I wanted to throw Lincoln a change-up pitch. He might have been able to resist if it had been Girl Jordan again, but Ronnie Anne showing up instead caught him off guard. 

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Next is when Lincoln has sex with Lucy, I love how he decides to just go with it, I thought that was really hot,

Lincoln keeps finding himself thrust into situations in which his will to resist is sorely tested...and continues to fail. 

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and I thought that when Lucy revealed that Lola told her about what happened, I thought that was really funny and I like how Lucy revealed that she was the only one who was told of this.                                                                                               

Couldn’t help but get in a little jibe about our favorite tiara-wearing tattletale.

Thanks for the review!

[Guest Star Wars player 1]

Your welcome  

[GeorgeGlass]

From ConanEdogawa on August 25, 2019

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Lincoln should have put it inside Lucy

Well, you’re entitled to your opinion.
 

 

[GeorgeGlass]

From Fairy-Slayer on August 26, 2019

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(Chapter 3: It Came in the Night)

Well, at least two came in the night. 

 

Yeah, but titling the chapter "They Came in the Night" seemed like too much of a spoiler.

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Lucy was extra-cute as she feigned her own happy dream as an excuse to get off on her horny brother. 

Not feigning, just fantasizing. 

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And as sweet as she tries to be, the idea that each sister he gets hot & heavy with seems to tell another has got to be pretty horrifying to the boy; 

Yep.

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Now we'll have to see if Lucy repeats the pattern, and with whom. (Okay, I usually try to avoid looking at the hint but couldn't avoid it this time. ) 

Literally?

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It's also nice to see dream Ronnie Anne standing in for Lucy's more-assertive approach to the somnambulistic sexiness. 

Girl Jordan could have done it (this is the girl who goes rabid during dodgeball, after all), but I wanted to change up the dream-girls to keep Lincoln off balance.

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Thanks.

Thank you!

[GeorgeGlass]

From Fairy-Slayer on August 31, 2019

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(Chapter 4: Literally Nothing Happened)

First off, how long will it take Lincoln to realize the sheer weirdness of Lori explaining – specifically by names – that all of his older sisters are using somewhat-foolproof birth control? It would have been one thing if Lori had mentioned that Rita (or Lynn Sr.) had pushed the option when each sister hit puberty, but this "just in case" almost seemed like Lori was giving him a checklist; better yet, by not mentioning the younger sisters at all she left good reason for Lincoln to keep being tense about his earlier sexual encounters.

Lori’s list is all the Loud girls who have hit puberty. But yes, it does seem a bit odd that every single one of them has a birth control implant, doesn’t it?

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Of course, things are so wonderfully weird for Lincoln already that what's a little foreshadowing going to hurt? Besides, he kept his promise to himself that none of his little sisters would be sleeping with him that night. He can be happy about that, right?

You had to scrape that cloud pretty hard to find the silver lining.

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Anyway, it was a nice twist to see Lori going to Lincoln in her insecure moments, both for the sake of having someone who can comfort her and, well yes, for the sweet hot action. Lincoln's way of getting her to open up about her bad dream while maintaining her ego was pretty sweet too; I especially like how he had Lori "hold Bun-Bun for me.' The What Would Clyde Do Besides Bleed to Death? was pretty funny as well.

I enjoyed writing that bit. Can’t have a Loud House story without some laughs!

Now I can't help but wonder if the cruelly-physical day camp thing has some role in Lincoln's sudden popularity, though my instincts tell me that something is affecting his sisters as well, and since only some of them are involved in the torture camp that's likely not it. (If it turns out to be the grass then you can be damned sure I'll be re-seeding my lawn!)

Don’t forget so use some Weed and Feed and Seed and Breed.

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At least whatever it is also gives Lincoln some good dreams to get things started, and no surprise that he'd keep falling for Jordan's and Ronnie-Anne's "tricks" in that regard. Jordan's comment about Lincoln's lack of resistance seems like an important clue.

Could be.

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Awesomely powerful sex scene, not least of all for Lori clearly wanting it from the moment Lincoln realized it was her.

Thanks! I liked writing that part, too.

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It's still not 100% clear that the girls are the ones initiating the sexual activity, but it really does seem like they're setting him up each time. Again, it will be fun to discover the truth. (Just check Luan's tapes? ) Kind of an important change that, this time, Lincoln can't deny that he wants to have sex with Lori again, regardless of the "wrongness" (never mind the shame & fear he's going to feel anyway). Also it's a bit sweet that he'd think of Bobby's feelings too, even in the moment of passion.

The changes will keep coming. 

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BTW, Phineas and Ferb wholeheartedly approve of your use of erg in a sexual context. (Like they'd every complain about your writing!)

No, they love it, but you should hear some of the comments Perry the Platypus has made. 

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Thanks for another fun chapter, and for hooking me even more.

You’re very welcome. Thanks for another lovely review.

[GeorgeGlass]

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From YamiNoKami on September 01, 2019

So Lisa is next? Why does that make me think of another story?

I’m not sure, but in the episode “Really Loud Music,” Lisa mentions that she’s “been known to dabble in the soft sciences.”

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I love how you had Lori act, reminds of the first Loud episode Left in the Dark, how she wanted to stay with Lincoln.

Interesting parallel.

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Though I can't help think that Lori or maybe Leni will end up lending Lincoln to their friends. That would be an interesting turn of events.

 

It would. Thanks for the comments!

[Yami-Iko-Kami]

11 hours ago, GeorgeGlass said:

I’m not sure, but in the episode “Really Loud Music,” Lisa mentions that she’s “been known to dabble in the soft sciences.” 

I was actually thinking about a story by Saiga called King of Molmol. In it a girl genius creates collar and nanobots that let one feel another’s pleasure. I kind of see Lisa doing something like that, wanting to experience and document the act of sex without damaging her immature body. Hmm that would make for an interesting story.

11 hours ago, GeorgeGlass said:

Interesting parallel.

It thought thats what you were going for.

12 hours ago, GeorgeGlass said:

It would. Thanks for the comments!

Are you thinking of doing that?

[GeorgeGlass]

31 minutes ago, Yami-Iko-Kami said:

I was actually thinking about a story by Saiga called King of Molmol. In it a girl genius creates collar and nanobots that let one feel another’s pleasure. I kind of see Lisa doing something like that, wanting to experience and document the act of sex without damaging her immature body. Hmm that would make for an interesting story.

I actually wrote a Steven Universe fic (“Splinter”) in which something similar happens. A microscopic, silicon-based life form called the Splinter infects the characters and, among other things, enables them to experience what other infected people are experiencing. So when two or more infected people have sex, they can feel their own pleasure and one another’s. 

As for Lincoln’s older sisters sharing him with their friends: I’m not planning that for this story, but I am giving serious thought to doing a sequel in which Lincoln’s circle of sex partners expands beyond the family.