BashfulScribe Posted July 2, 2015 Author Report Share Posted July 2, 2015 In reply to one of magusfang's earliest comments, don't feel bad. I'm glad you feel comfortable enough to criticize my story. Perhaps Adam's reaction was out of character, but without spoiling anything long-term about the story, I can say that pretty much everything I do in the story has done kind of purpose behind it, and that reaction wasn't an exception. When the story is done completely, I'll leave it up to you all, the readers, once the full scale of everything has been revealed, to determine whether it was a bad move on my part or not. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
magusfang Posted July 2, 2015 Report Share Posted July 2, 2015 This forum got really weird, really quickly. You are very welcome And it wasn't really a criticism so much as an observation, I'm thinking kind of like Joe that it was a red flag but you put it there for a reason...so write faster, its killing me! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Long Posted July 2, 2015 Report Share Posted July 2, 2015 I can say that pretty much everything I do in the story has done kind of purpose behind it, and that reaction wasn't an exception. When the story is done completely, I'll leave it up to you all, the readers, once the full scale of everything has been revealed, to determine whether it was a bad move on my part or not. I could see how you were developing the plot, so I was trusting you to handle it. It's not my fault magus is so violent. I'd also encourage you to give us new material faster, but I've been writing the same chapter for 6 months. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
magusfang Posted July 2, 2015 Report Share Posted July 2, 2015 jeez, stab someone in the eye and everyone gets all judgemental Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Long Posted July 2, 2015 Report Share Posted July 2, 2015 jeez, stab someone in the eye and everyone gets all judgemental well, you had me rolling on the floor all morning gotta clean this blood up... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
that-one-guy Posted July 2, 2015 Report Share Posted July 2, 2015 (edited) This forum got really weird, really quickly. Yeah that happens from time to time. You got to make sure you come back to poke us with the cattle prod every so often Edited July 2, 2015 by that-one-guy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
magusfang Posted July 2, 2015 Report Share Posted July 2, 2015 Yeah, don't give us too much time to think, nothing good ever comes from that Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BashfulScribe Posted July 3, 2015 Author Report Share Posted July 3, 2015 Could I actually ask the forum (and by that I mean like three people) a question? I'm genuinely curious - based on the outcoem of the last chapter and the cliffhanger it caused, who do you think is in the wrong and why? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
magusfang Posted July 3, 2015 Report Share Posted July 3, 2015 I just think Adam would have flipped when Nicole and his three old tormentors were flirting, remember ho he was after the fight. But it could be a delayed bomb. I kust see him getting all teary and running away. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Long Posted July 3, 2015 Report Share Posted July 3, 2015 (edited) by "the cliffhanger it caused" I have to assume you mean Phil & May? If so, then I'm not sure because we don't have details yet. We know what Phil has done to Nicole in the past, but she sitll chooses to be around him (not like with Jeff). On the other hand, a drunk May had wrongly accused Adam several months before. Atter Adam's talk with Phil, I can see Adam losing his temper without wanting a full knowledge of the facts and attacking Phil, which could leave Nicole to wonder why. A hatred of Phil? A love of May? But what if May was blowing things out of proportion again, and Phil was like what Adam was before? As far as conflict and drama, I'd say Adam attacks Phil without thinking it out, but then later finds out May twisted the truth just like she did before and Phil really wasn't guilty. Adam's pissed at May, Phil's pissed at Adam, and Nicole doesn't know what the fuck to think of any of them. Edited July 3, 2015 by Joe Long Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
magusfang Posted July 3, 2015 Report Share Posted July 3, 2015 stabs him in the eye? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BashfulScribe Posted July 3, 2015 Author Report Share Posted July 3, 2015 I meant more along the lines of "May says Phil did it. Phil said he didn't. Who's lying?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Long Posted July 3, 2015 Report Share Posted July 3, 2015 I meant more along the lines of "May says Phil did it. Phil said he didn't. Who's lying?" That's the problem - Phil has done it in the past, May has lied in the past. As I detailed above, I'll go with the drunk May lying again. She saw how Adam came to her rescue in the school, and she said she wanted to make him jealous. She's looking for attention from Adam. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Samara Posted July 3, 2015 Report Share Posted July 3, 2015 if you ask me bashful I think it was mainly fault of three people , Adam,May &phill. I think it was Adams fault because I really didn't like his comment where he asked one. of his tormentors how Nicole's pussy feels, simply because Adam is not that type of a guy and Nicole is important to him more than sex. and I think it was May's fault because she confessed that she didn't valued Adam's feelings knowingly. but when he got some bulk in his body then she started to notice him and tried to make him jealous,offered no string attached sex. it was uncalled for. in the party after the drama I don't think any serious fight will take place as we got to know that Adam is not that kind of a guy who will start fighting without knowing proper reasons.though he will defend May and maybe a rich argument and two three slaps or punches will be delivered. and I think it was phills fault because he doesn't really know when to stop or what the word "no" means.though May flaunted on him, he should not act a dom on her. and I don't think May will try to attract Adam's attention by lying to him about phills acts because to make him jealous it was enough to rub on his face that she had sex with phill.though I can be wrong. and maybe when Adam will console May , Nicole will get jealous and start to value his feelings for herself. I don't know if I'm right because a woman's taught process is complex enough even for another woman. ha ha .. lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Samara Posted July 3, 2015 Report Share Posted July 3, 2015 (edited) That's the problem - Phil has done it in the past, May has lied in the past. As I detailed above, I'll go with the drunk May lying again. She saw how Adam came to her rescue in the school, and she said she wanted to make him jealous. She's looking for attention from Adam. we all know that when a person is drunk he or she opens up and become too honest for their own good. so I don't think she can scheme a plan in that state. and I must say generally a woman doesn't think like that . So I don't agree with you. no offense. Edited July 3, 2015 by Samara Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Long Posted July 3, 2015 Report Share Posted July 3, 2015 we all know that when a person is drunk he or she opens up and become too honest for their own good. so I don't think she can scheme a plan in that state. and I must say generally a woman doesn't think like that . So I don't agree with you. no offense. No offense! May did run off saying, "I'll make you jealous!" but last with Adam had to sober up to start regretting what she had done. Maybe the outcome will be that no one's sure of what happened and everyone will be pissed at everyone else. Bad feelings all around. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Samara Posted July 3, 2015 Report Share Posted July 3, 2015 yeah may be.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
magusfang Posted July 3, 2015 Report Share Posted July 3, 2015 :shakes head sadly: someone is definately getting stabbed in the eye...sigh... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Long Posted July 3, 2015 Report Share Posted July 3, 2015 yeah may be.. Oh, c'mon now...let me cheer you up! (she reaches for a fork) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
magusfang Posted July 3, 2015 Report Share Posted July 3, 2015 Woo Hoo fork in the eye Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Long Posted July 3, 2015 Report Share Posted July 3, 2015 (edited) Love Battlestar Galactica Stabbing people in the eye reminded me of Kara and Leoben, even though she only got him in the neck (more than once, IIRC). The poor guy really had thing for her, only to get treated like that. Here's a nice fan video which gets the point across (at 1:15) Edited July 4, 2015 by Joe Long Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Blah_blah_blah Posted July 4, 2015 Report Share Posted July 4, 2015 I really didn't like his comment where he asked one. of his tormentors how Nicole's pussy feels, simply because Adam is not that type of a guy and Nicole is important to him more than sex. I totally agree with that. That party actually felt a little unnatural, especially the part when Nicole said that that tormentor was "fucking owned" by Adam. In my book, Adam didn't "own" Isaiah or Kenny or whoever at all, so I was a little surprised to read that Nicole was crying because she was laughing so hard. There have been a few other moments like that in the series, but in general, it's quite good. Can't wait for chapter 13! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
magusfang Posted July 4, 2015 Report Share Posted July 4, 2015 (edited) I totally agree with that. That party actually felt a little unnatural, especially the part when Nicole said that that tormentor was "fucking owned" by Adam. In my book, Adam didn't "own" Isaiah or Kenny or whoever at all, so I was a little surprised to read that Nicole was crying because she was laughing so hard. There have been a few other moments like that in the series, but in general, it's quite good. Can't wait for chapter 13! Thats what I thought but it could be attributed to beer and trying to look tough for Nicole and her trying to have his back. Making more of his joke than what was there because she could see how uncomfortable he was around them. Edited July 4, 2015 by magusfang Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Starkz Posted July 4, 2015 Report Share Posted July 4, 2015 BAAAAAAAAAASHFULLL HE's HEREEEEE Love your work man. Love your work. Following since the start. -Stark. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Dark lust Posted July 7, 2015 Report Share Posted July 7, 2015 May wants attention she will blame who ever to get it even hurting her friends that's my opinion but he was zipping uP his pants in front of them so it's hard to see who is at fault here Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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