jelad Posted October 2, 2014 Report Posted October 2, 2014 great chapter and I don't know how I will pass the time till the next story. This cliffhanger is the worst so far, dude you are killing me. If you thank about it there is something, in the middle, of the chapter that could be a significant question or a minny cliffhanger. I don't want to mess it up for those that haven't read it yet. Meanwhile, great job next please. Quote
Guest Rescue25 Posted October 2, 2014 Report Posted October 2, 2014 Looks like they don't have to travel far to take out bad guys. Good chapter. Twins in Kevlar!! LOVE IT!. B Quote
GEMINI Posted October 2, 2014 Report Posted October 2, 2014 Awesome as always. Keep up the great writing. As always love the cliffhangers Quote
COJimmyV Posted October 2, 2014 Report Posted October 2, 2014 Really LOVE these school chapters and the back-and-forth banter although you're definitely showing your age with Mr. Garrison's Sgt. Schultz impression. That was awesome! Gangs, huh? Max and Company just can't seem to stay out of trouble. This couldn't DEFINITELY get ugly. Looks like it's time to warm up the spiders and strap on the twins' Kevlar. Sounds like a bumpy ride. Hundybuns 1 Quote
Guest Rescue25 Posted October 2, 2014 Report Posted October 2, 2014 GITG Chapter 23 is up, next chapter will take a while, have some things to take care of in the real world so...hopefully no more then three days, a week at the outside. Gotta win the lotto so I can lock myself in my office and write 24/7 Please! Pretty Please. Do we need to put sugar on top?? B Quote
Guest Rescue25 Posted October 2, 2014 Report Posted October 2, 2014 Really LOVE these school chapters and the back-and-forth banter although you're definitely showing your age with Mr. Garrison's Sgt. Schultz impression. That was awesome! Gangs, huh? Max and Company just can't seem to stay out of trouble. This couldn't DEFINITELY get ugly. Looks like it's time to warm up the spiders and strap on the twins' Kevlar. Sounds like a bumpy ride. I agree. But if the girls intervene a message could be sent that you don't want to mess with the females in that school. Serious loss of face and maybe your face itself. But who knows what evil twist Magus has in store for us? B Quote
angeldust Posted October 2, 2014 Report Posted October 2, 2014 Hey Cloud Source, see how much you can raise that way. Quote
COJimmyV Posted October 2, 2014 Report Posted October 2, 2014 I agree. But if the girls intervene a message could be sent that you don't want to mess with the females in that school. Serious loss of face and maybe your face itself. But who knows what evil twist Magus has in store for us? B Max did ask if the twins had their "toys". Certainly hoping they're not packing in school. Even if they decided to come to Max's rescue, that would get them in all kinds of trouble. Probably best to let Max handle this although I can't see how the girls would just sit back. So many scenarios. That's why I love/hate the cliffhangers! Hoping it's not too long a wait for the next one. That would just be mean. Quote
Sniper014 Posted October 3, 2014 Report Posted October 3, 2014 Great chapter. Will be awaiting the next chapter. Can not wait for the new school to open. Can not wait to see if the twins or the girls get to help Max out. If would be really nice to have the word spread around that a 6 year old kicked the butt of a gang member. Need to find out what the sheriff is hiding in his background. Keep up the great work. I am waiting for book 3. Quote
magusfang Posted October 3, 2014 Author Report Posted October 3, 2014 Damn, I haven't finished book 2 yet... Quote
magusfang Posted October 3, 2014 Author Report Posted October 3, 2014 So had a little free time and just finished the fight scene...oh the blood, the horror...the humanity of it all! COJimmyV 1 Quote
Guest Rescue25 Posted October 3, 2014 Report Posted October 3, 2014 Max did ask if the twins had their "toys". Certainly hoping they're not packing in school. Even if they decided to come to Max's rescue, that would get them in all kinds of trouble. Probably best to let Max handle this although I can't see how the girls would just sit back. So many scenarios. That's why I love/hate the cliffhangers! Hoping it's not too long a wait for the next one. That would just be mean. From what Jazz did I think that the "girls" have been practicing in the VR. It would seem that hands and feet are enough. From Mag's post above I hope that the blood is from the 3 interlopers. Sometimes I think he just wants to keep us on edge. I do agree that, in this day and time, hardware in the school is probably not accepatable to most people. B Quote
Guest Rescue25 Posted October 3, 2014 Report Posted October 3, 2014 So had a little free time and just finished the fight scene...oh the blood, the horror...the humanity of it all! So how long before you are going to let us read it?? B Quote
magusfang Posted October 3, 2014 Author Report Posted October 3, 2014 Couldn't sleep so wrote instead, have over half the chapter written...still stuck in a few places. You'll be happy to know that I haven't really set up a cliffhanger, I think this chapter will be almost a stand alone with a nice little conclusion...maybe a funeral... Quote
angeldust Posted October 3, 2014 Report Posted October 3, 2014 (edited) Could that place be an 'e'? I think that you have painted yourself into a corner with Hans, he's either a bad guy who knew about his order or has become one of those goody two shoes. Keep him as a fence sitter, some one that will help as long as it does not conflict with His morals or better still have Legion do him in when he tries to kill Max et al. Now the Sheriff you could have him as a member of the gang who gets killed in the cross fire by Leroy which gets the Sheriff's Dept & State Police to come down on the gang and the gang turning him in hoping that it will cause the heat to subside. Max & the scooby gang then wipe them out when he realises that they are the ones corrupting the older girls he had found. I bet he was the fat bastard that had Max's attackers transfered to the jail, sounds like one of your plot twists. Now no more shout outs or postings here until you get the next chapter up ... and it better be a nice long one too, you don't want folks saying your stories a short. Edited October 3, 2014 by angeldust Quote
Hundybuns Posted October 3, 2014 Report Posted October 3, 2014 Hi, There is one character that seems to be somewhat pushed into the background. I mean Amy. If you look back through both series you will find she is very important. She was Max's second gilrfriend after Emma. She always seemed to start all love sessions. After Max saved the girls from the rabid dog and was recovering in the hospital she was the first of the girls Maxdiddled to an orgasim. Whwn Mike called saying he wouldn't be home for Amy's birthday she is the one to suggest that Alice trace the call. She also named the house Jeeves. After Max found out Amy was dieing she is was instrumental in getting Marge to change her mind about Emma, Amy and Max having full blown sex. Amy was the one to get the mothers to join Max's harem. She convinced Max and June to make a baby together. Amy was the main reason that the "Four" went to school. Amy basically the reason that Becca joined the family along with Suzi. But lately it seems that Amy as well as Alice seem to be pushed into the background. I love how you have paired them all up but, Magus I really wish that you would bring Amy and Alice closer to Max, Emma and Marge. Now with bitchpriest trying to push a wedge between Amy/Alice and Max/Emma please let Max realize what is going on and get closer again to Amy and Alice. This is just my observations and wishes. As you can probably see I am a hopeless romantic. Quote
Guest Rescue25 Posted October 3, 2014 Report Posted October 3, 2014 Couldn't sleep so wrote instead, have over half the chapter written...still stuck in a few places. You'll be happy to know that I haven't really set up a cliffhanger, I think this chapter will be almost a stand alone with a nice little conclusion...maybe a funeral... Not yet you haven't set up a c'hanger. If you haven't posted you still have time. Hope the funeral is NOT a MC or "family" member. You just love teasing us don't you???? B Quote
Guest Guest Posted October 3, 2014 Report Posted October 3, 2014 Maybe…” Suzy replied softly, Rick’s confidence in her doing much to calm her, “But I’m gonna keep a close eye on that old man and if so much as looks sideways at me I’m going to have Jazz put him down!” Maybe that is the answer to the "funeral" tease that Mangus left. Notice Susie is relying on Jazz for action. B Quote
COJimmyV Posted October 3, 2014 Report Posted October 3, 2014 So had a little free time and just finished the fight scene...oh the blood, the horror...the humanity of it all! Seriously, a teaser commercial for the next episode? I don't think your ratings really need an extra boost. It's not like it's sweeps month or anything. Or is it? Looking forward to Max going on the gang-bangers! Quote
GEMINI Posted October 3, 2014 Report Posted October 3, 2014 A funeral, you do really love teasing us don't you. I will be waiting. Quote
Guest Rescue25 Posted October 3, 2014 Report Posted October 3, 2014 A funeral, you do really love teasing us don't you. I will be waiting. You don't think ypu are alone do you?? There's a bunch of us waiting and fidgeting and pacing AND haunting the site. B Quote
GEMINI Posted October 3, 2014 Report Posted October 3, 2014 You don't think ypu are alone do you?? There's a bunch of us waiting and fidgeting and pacing AND haunting the site. B That why I said us and not just me, I know it killing a lot of us for the next chapter. Quote
magusfang Posted October 3, 2014 Author Report Posted October 3, 2014 So, it's raining cats and dogs here (the small thuds as they hit the ground are a bit disturbing...) so I canceled my class, no one wants to shoot in the rain anyway, and am sitting in the range house writing; with any luck I'll have the next chapter posted sometime to night. Quote
darthel0101 Posted October 4, 2014 Report Posted October 4, 2014 I have to wonder what would happen if Cynthia got chipped early with Legion now self-aware and being talked to by the twins. Cyn is already recognizing her daddy's presense and aware of her manipulations; teach her mind to be truely awesome in comparison to her elders. Quote
magusfang Posted October 4, 2014 Author Report Posted October 4, 2014 Ok, 24 is up and the crap is starting to add up, should be a hell of an avalanche soon! I have to wonder what would happen if Cynthia got chipped early with Legion now self-aware and being talked to by the twins. Cyn is already recognizing her daddy's presense and aware of her manipulations; teach her mind to be truely awesome in comparison to her elders. Max would never chip Cyndi this early, no father would ever take a chance like that especially with his first born daughter Quote
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