magusfang Posted September 30, 2014 Author Report Share Posted September 30, 2014 Sorry guys can't wait I have to ask Magus a question. Is the old priest just trying to stir up crap or is this the way the story is going to head. I hope not. I will say more later don't want to mess the chapter up for the rest. Not sure what you mean, but if your asking if the priest starts banging people in the family then no, I have other less pleasant plans for him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
COJimmyV Posted September 30, 2014 Report Share Posted September 30, 2014 Jeeves and (don't want to spoil it yet)? Sure as heck didn't see THAT coming! Makes me wonder if we're looking at some type of group wedding although honestly, I think Max and Emma deserve one of their own. Nice character-developing chapter. I think these chapters that show the family dynamic are really important to the overall story. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Christian1040 Posted September 30, 2014 Report Share Posted September 30, 2014 I think and i dont know if this is what hundy meant is that the priest is putting the thought that Max only wants to be with Emma and not them, in Alice and Amy's head, which might stir up crap in their relationship towards one another. I personally hope that the dynamics of everyones relationship towards Max doesn't change. Their group relationship has been part of the story since BITG Ch.1 and it would suck to have that changed now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Christian1040 Posted September 30, 2014 Report Share Posted September 30, 2014 And i can't remember if i read this or im just imagining it, but i think Max said in one of the previous chapters that in the beginning he would only get with the others girls because Emma wanted him to and that he would just be happy with Emma alone. Then added that now he did it because he wanted to. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angeldust Posted September 30, 2014 Report Share Posted September 30, 2014 Marge needs her own man as does May or stick 'em together as a couple realising that they only need each other after all. Now we need to find out what Carol et al have been up to during all of this and please stop having Max involved with the Sheriff so much it is repetitive and quickly becoming boring. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Christian1040 Posted September 30, 2014 Report Share Posted September 30, 2014 I dont think thats possible since you know Marge and Max have a baby together and with all the talking in the previous chapters about Marge being in love with Max and Max saying he loves her and is willing to fight for her..to just drop all that would make no sense. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
darthel0101 Posted September 30, 2014 Report Share Posted September 30, 2014 Re-reading BITG and found an issue with the timeline around the divorce court times. Initial court session is Thursday afternoon but they are told the next evening that the next court date would be the next day. That would put official business being done on a Saturday. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spaced_monkey Posted September 30, 2014 Report Share Posted September 30, 2014 i think he meant business day Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest futalov10 Posted September 30, 2014 Report Share Posted September 30, 2014 I think giving the priest free run of the family is and was a big mistake. The family dose not know the depth of the old priests involvement in the hipocracie of the church. You can not have been involved with these kind of men and women for all those decade's and not been corupted. Max has let a snake into the garden, and it already sowing the seeds of doubt, separation, and fear. And more yet how are the saved girls and women going to respond, becouse it was the church and priests that put them in bell. max needs to kill the priest soon he knows to meny of max,s greatest secrets all he has to do tell the world and the greedy of the world will rip max,s life apart trying to take it for them selve. It is my opinion that Max,s greatest strengths is his unknowns that he brings to the table and his ability to work invisible also His resolve comes from the love, absolute trust, and devotion to one another in his family Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest futalov10 Posted September 30, 2014 Report Share Posted September 30, 2014 I think giving the priest free run of the family is and was a big mistake. The family dose not know the depth of the old priests involvement in the hipocracie of the church. You can not have been involved with these kind of men and women for all those decade's and not been corupted. Max has let a snake into the garden, and it already sowing the seeds of doubt, separation, and fear. And more yet how are the saved girls and women going to respond, becouse it was the church and priests that put them in bell. max needs to kill the priest soon he knows to meny of max,s greatest secrets all he has to do tell the world and the greedy of the world will rip max,s life apart trying to take it for them selve. It is my opinion that Max,s greatest strengths is his unknowns that he brings to the table and his ability to work invisible also His resolve comes from the love, absolute trust, and devotion to one another in his family Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest futalov10 Posted September 30, 2014 Report Share Posted September 30, 2014 I think giving the priest free run of the family is and was a big mistake. The family dose not know the depth of the old priests involvement in the hipocracie of the church. You can not have been involved with these kind of men and women for all those decade's and not been corupted. Max has let a snake into the garden, and it already sowing the seeds of doubt, separation, and fear. And more yet how are the saved girls and women going to respond, becouse it was the church and priests that put them in bell. max needs to kill the priest soon he knows to meny of max,s greatest secrets all he has to do tell the world and the greedy of the world will rip max,s life apart trying to take it for them selve. It is my opinion that Max,s greatest strengths is his unknowns that he brings to the table and his ability to work invisible also His resolve comes from the love, absolute trust, and devotion to one another in his family Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest futalov10 Posted September 30, 2014 Report Share Posted September 30, 2014 I think giving the priest free run of the family is and was a big mistake. The family dose not know the depth of the old priests involvement in the hipocracie of the church. You can not have been involved with these kind of men and women for all those decade's and not been corupted. Max has let a snake into the garden, and it already sowing the seeds of doubt, separation, and fear. And more yet how are the saved girls and women going to respond, becouse it was the church and priests that put them in bell. max needs to kill the priest soon he knows to meny of max,s greatest secrets all he has to do tell the world and the greedy of the world will rip max,s life apart trying to take it for them selve. It is my opinion that Max,s greatest strengths is his unknowns that he brings to the table and his ability to work invisible also His resolve comes from the love, absolute trust, and devotion to one another in his family Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest futalov10 Posted September 30, 2014 Report Share Posted September 30, 2014 I think giving the priest free run of the family is and was a big mistake. The family dose not know the depth of the old priests involvement in the hipocracie of the church. You can not have been involved with these kind of men and women for all those decade's and not been corupted. Max has let a snake into the garden, and it already sowing the seeds of doubt, separation, and fear. And more yet how are the saved girls and women going to respond, becouse it was the church and priests that put them in bell. max needs to kill the priest soon he knows to meny of max,s greatest secrets all he has to do tell the world and the greedy of the world will rip max,s life apart trying to take it for them selve. It is my opinion that Max,s greatest strengths is his unknowns that he brings to the table and his ability to work invisible also His resolve comes from the love, absolute trust, and devotion to one another in his family Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
magusfang Posted September 30, 2014 Author Report Share Posted September 30, 2014 I think giving the priest free run of the family is and was a big mistake. The family dose not know the depth of the old priests involvement in the hipocracie of the church. You can not have been involved with these kind of men and women for all those decade's and not been corupted. Max has let a snake into the garden, and it already sowing the seeds of doubt, separation, and fear. And more yet how are the saved girls and women going to respond, becouse it was the church and priests that put them in bell. max needs to kill the priest soon he knows to meny of max,s greatest secrets all he has to do tell the world and the greedy of the world will rip max,s life apart trying to take it for them selve. It is my opinion that Max,s greatest strengths is his unknowns that he brings to the table and his ability to work invisible also His resolve comes from the love, absolute trust, and devotion to one another in his family Uh oh, I think someone is on to something... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
magusfang Posted September 30, 2014 Author Report Share Posted September 30, 2014 Ok, have a few questions to answer. No, never touched on blowing up the underground complex, honestly I never even thought about it I use the desriptives to address who I'm talking about so I don't write the names like five times in the same sentence. Since there are a lot of scenes between to girls just using pronouns can get confusing Had some comments about Jeeves and the profesor, I thought it was a natural progression; they were built together, have been basically coinhabitants of the houses systems since they were built, they became self aware together, and since they are machines normal ideas that humans have about sexuality don't really apply to them. Call it a friendship that evolved into something else I tend to agree about naming Tess's baby after Cat's sister rather than Cat, but didn't think of it (really wish I had too, that would have been a fun little tangent) As for the twins acting like adults one minute and kids the next, well believe it or not it happens; I have seen girls that young or just a bit older act so mich more mature than their years after deep trauma like the twins; they ussually aren't as happy or recover so quickly but I didn't want them completely messed up, I think the story is more fun this way - call it artistic licence. and the last question: I am planning another book with new bad guys, it'll be something that evolves out of something Max did in the first book. But the third book will probably end the story. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hundybuns Posted September 30, 2014 Report Share Posted September 30, 2014 Not sure what you mean, but if your asking if the priest starts banging people in the family then no, I have other less pleasant plans for him. No, what I mean is it looks like the priest is trying to drive a wedge between Max and Amy/Alice by saying that Max doesn't really love them. As for what Angeldust suggests that Marge get her own man, I hope not. Not just for the fact that Marge and Max have Cindy together together but there seems to be a love there that goes way back. Anyway that's my look at things for now, except Magus you really have a way of getting people talking about your stories. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hundybuns Posted September 30, 2014 Report Share Posted September 30, 2014 Well I hope in your planned third book you at least keep the original six characters together along with their kids. Just hoping. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
darthel0101 Posted September 30, 2014 Report Share Posted September 30, 2014 and the last question: I am planning another book with new bad guys, it'll be something that evolves out of something Max did in the first book. But the third book will probably end the story. Do us a favor and don't make it the DOD discovering what David did to them. Breach of contract is a hard fight and could end up giving them control of the mainframes. They also have computer/signal tracking abilities which rival most countries. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Rescue25 Posted September 30, 2014 Report Share Posted September 30, 2014 I think the two AI in love is pushing the sci-fi. Futalov seems to be having a problem learning the guest posting process. It can be a BEAR! I think the descriptives are OK but I do get a little lost sometimes trying to remember who looks like what. Don't even want to think about another book. That would mean this story would end and I'm enjoying it too much to want it to end. YOU are a very addictive author. I try to not over think some of the scenarios. It is, to me, a fun story with many unexpected twist and turns. The twins are really fun especially when you put them in Kevlar. The maturity that some of the kids show after their hard experiences does seem to ring true but as you have shown given the right circumstance they are young and can revert back to age approiate behavior. You know you are good when each time you post a chapter "we" burn this forum up!! B Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
magusfang Posted September 30, 2014 Author Report Share Posted September 30, 2014 Yeah, I really like the feedback, I have saved the comments and plan to use them if I ever get around to editing this monster. My plan is to edit out a lot of the hardcore sex, not all but some. BITG especially was written with the audience in mind and when I didn't have sex in a chapter everyone went nuts; I really like that at this site sexless chapters don't get me flamed quite as much. Who knows, maybe when it's cleaned up a bit I'll shop it around, all I've ever had published before were textbooks and training manuals ( not a lot of fun to write or read) so this should be something different. But as you can tell by my plethora of mistakes, I'm not much on editting; it's not as fun as letting my imagination run wild. Oh, and I assure you, the third book isn't about the DOD, that would be way to predictable...I've got something cominig from WAAAYYYY out in left field And I know I push the realm of belivability sometimes, well a lot of the time, but that's the fun of writing sci-fi; include some realistic themes right along side things that are just plain crazy! I mean is it any worse than boy wizards that need corrective lenses? I mean if you can re-grow bones why can't you cure a little myopia? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sniper014 Posted September 30, 2014 Report Share Posted September 30, 2014 Finished 22. Enjoyed it. Also a little concerned about the priest. About Jeeves and the Professor getting together, so what. You have two Androds with women and no one ever said anything about Alice with Amy or May with Marge so I do not see anything wrong with the new match up. Either completely change the priest's thinking about Max and the family or kill him off because I see him trying to bring down the house and everyone in it and then the children will be back were they were before. Being controlled by the evil forces of the world and everything that Max and the girls have done will be for nothing. Nice reference to boy wizard as it we did not know who you were talking about. And I agree with you. Can do magic but not fix eye sight. Will be waiting for the next chapters of this story and Northstar. Also will still be waiting for the Going Home story to be completed. Bring on the third book also. More to read. You are good. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sniper014 Posted September 30, 2014 Report Share Posted September 30, 2014 I agree we need to keep these young uns in place ... now stop hogging that mickey. I have a thread here in General called: About angeldust's Ramblings my stories . angeldust is from my younger days when friends realised my initials are pcp. http://members.adult-fanfiction.org/profile.php?no=1296951812&view=story&zone=original I know that this is Magus site but I have read both of your stories and the only way to leave you anything about your stories to to review them which I did. My question is when is the next chapters coming out. I keep checking your site each day with no luck on newer chapters. But like the stories we are following on this site I will keep looking on your site for updates. Thanks again for the good stories. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
magusfang Posted September 30, 2014 Author Report Share Posted September 30, 2014 I know that this is Magus site but I have read both of your stories and the only way to leave you anything about your stories to to review them which I did. My question is when is the next chapters coming out. I keep checking your site each day with no luck on newer chapters. But like the stories we are following on this site I will keep looking on your site for updates. Thanks again for the good stories. Yeah, what he said! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angeldust Posted September 30, 2014 Report Share Posted September 30, 2014 (edited) Well I do have a forum like this here under General as for next chapters I am writing again and hopefully will get them out soon. Trouble is on my word2007 it's all one story not quite chapters. Be patient my guys have been wandering and are a bit reticent about sharing what has happened. http://www2.adult-fanfiction.org/forum/index.php/topic/57572-about-angeldusts-ramblings/ Edited September 30, 2014 by angeldust Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GEMINI Posted September 30, 2014 Report Share Posted September 30, 2014 Magus Will you be finishing Northstar before you start writing book three or just continue writing three stories at the same time again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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