Vocabulary Turn-offs

[shinigamiinochi]

While I used to use the word 'juicy', I don't believe I've ever used any variation on the word 'delicious.' I think this stems from my fear of hot-dog-dick analogies and the fact that I've seen 'Teeth' and 'Jenifer' enough times that such an analogy makes me squirm a little, and I'm not even a guy.

[Guest sylvir]

Drinking kisses is something I've read that is weird.

I feel like someone's lips are melting off.

oww and eww

[JCullen]

Hmm....I know what you mean...I've read stories that are actually really very good, original yet keeping realism. Then comes a sex scene that gets thrown by one silly or overused word (or more than one, that's happened too)and I suddenly loose interest in continuing the story. I've had moments where I was really into a chapter and something as small and simple as a single word has actually made my face contort. Strange how a word can have so much impact. Intriguing too...there should be a list of words that should never ever be used under any circumstances. lol.

And about the grammar/ spelling; that gets on my nerves too. My mom is an English teacher and, though my grammar is far from perfect, I think that as a writer things such as syntax, grammar and spelling should be taken just as seriously as things such as plot, character developement and movement of the story.

It's the details in the fabric that compile a true work of art, not the person doing the creating.

*shrugs*

That's what I think.

[Clockwork_Knight]

More wonderfuly wrong words you do NOT want to see in a fic

semen-strands (If your semen is stringy shouldn't you see a doctor? )

serpant cock

Fuck the piss out of my ass (I was under the impression one's ass did not in fact contain urine. )

thick come juice

dripping piss hole ( STD any one ?)

Shooting white ribbons

thick white mancum

burning manrod

cockseed

globes ( Unless there are mountain ranges on it, an ass does not look like a globe.)

cum soup ( EWWWWWWWWWW)

rippling spasm

climaxed rapture

the giggle of her ass ( Giggling. Ass......I have no words.)

The thud of his hips became a hum ( The goddamn washing machine is broken ! )

Cum Tsunami

[JCullen]

More wonderfuly wrong words you do NOT want to see in a fic

semen-strands (If your semen is stringy shouldn't you see a doctor? )

serpant cock

Fuck the piss out of my ass (I was under the impression one's ass did not in fact contain urine. )

thick come juice

dripping piss hole ( STD any one ?)

Shooting white ribbons

thick white mancum

burning manrod

cockseed

globes ( Unless there are mountain ranges on it, an ass does not look like a globe.)

cum soup ( EWWWWWWWWWW)

rippling spasm

climaxed rapture

the giggle of her ass ( Giggling. Ass......I have no words.)

The thud of his hips became a hum ( The goddamn washing machine is broken ! )

Cum Tsunami

My God do people actually use these words? Eish... Globes I've heard but serpant cock?

[Clockwork_Knight]

Yes people do really use those words and worse. I don't know why they think something that awful will turn any one but a mently challanged person on

[JayDee]

Hey don't knock us mentally challenged folk. Ignorance is bliss!

[Calanthee]

More wonderfuly wrong words you do NOT want to see in a fic

semen-strands (If your semen is stringy shouldn't you see a doctor? )

serpant cock

Fuck the piss out of my ass (I was under the impression one's ass did not in fact contain urine. )

thick come juice

dripping piss hole ( STD any one ?)

Shooting white ribbons

thick white mancum

burning manrod

cockseed

globes ( Unless there are mountain ranges on it, an ass does not look like a globe.)

cum soup ( EWWWWWWWWWW)

rippling spasm

climaxed rapture

the giggle of her ass ( Giggling. Ass......I have no words.)

The thud of his hips became a hum ( The goddamn washing machine is broken ! )

Cum Tsunami

Yo fussy fussy, Dude?

I though every one was allowed to do their thing here, surly some of examples you have given are cluttered examples of poor taste in erotic literatuture, but did you ever consider they might be trying for ridiculous humor in their literary endeavors.

A. It could been worse, the writer, could have writen, his seed came out his like silly string!

B. His hard serpant cock struck hard and viscious like a viper, penetrating his partner's innocent channel like a predator. If you dress it up it works.

C. Your right this one just friggin stupid. Unless you have a particular fetish!

D. Thick cum flowed from him like a endless fountain of Juice/nectar

E. His member slowly leaked drops of pearls and tears from his pulsating tip.

F. Irridence white wet ribbons shot from his member and over his companions belly.

G. This is stupid too... like it suggest their such a thing as woman cum, or LOL is there such a thing?

H. Burning Manhood, maybe you should see a Doctor.... a hard warm and heated cock pressed eagerly against his thigh. Manrod? Is he armed or Horney?

I. The word cock is superfluous. Human seed only comes from one place, unless there is mutants I don't know about?

J. Your wrong there is nothing wrong about using the word globe to describe a perfect tight curving male ass cheek, in a long legged total fit male... sphere works well too... truly one of my favorite male parts.

K. Actually never heard of this soup receipe before, surely Cambells doesn't carry it.

L. She/He orgaismed and her/he body wildly rippled and spasmed, as the climax took control.

M. The rapture caused by climax caused him to nearly pass out.

N. The giggle of her ass, least I am stupid or I am congested... Yo dude she simply farted. so flee and save yourself.

O. Hips pound or slap, But sugar they don't hum, only the mouth can do that! Trust me!

Calanthee My view

[Clockwork_Knight]

A. It could been worse, the writer, could have writen, his seed came out his like silly string!

Sadly, I have seen that one. I get a mental image of some one who has a can of silly string attached to their crotch

B. His hard serpant cock struck hard and viscious like a viper, penetrating his partner's innocent channel like a predator. If you dress it up it works.

So some one is being fucked by a staff with a snake head on it ?

K. Actually never heard of this soup receipe before, surely Cambells doesn't carry it.

I think the Dollar Store carries it. That and Cream of Man soup

N. The giggle of her ass, least I am stupid or I am congested... Yo dude she simply farted. so flee and save yourself.

If her ass is giggling then either she's an alein or theres a midgiet hidding in her ass

[Guest sylvir]

Male characters in Yaoi having a mysterious vagina.

I have read 2 count them TWO stories where a character has an unexplained vagina opening right behind the balls near the asshole.

The second I read the descovering of this mysterious hole I closed out of the page and reread something I know I liked. I always keep the links to some very good stories in my bookmarks for just this situation.

Luckily this situation is usually paired with MPREG which I try not to read.

[Harley Quinn hyenaholic]

The word 'impale' with regards to 'cock'.

Put that word away! It's not a bloody weapon!

Even when used in conjunction with rapefics it makes me wish I was somewhere else.

[yblue]

Male characters in Yaoi having a mysterious vagina.

I have read 2 count them TWO stories where a character has an unexplained vagina opening right behind the balls near the asshole.

The second I read the descovering of this mysterious hole I closed out of the page and reread something I know I liked. I always keep the links to some very good stories in my bookmarks for just this situation.

Luckily this situation is usually paired with MPREG which I try not to read.

Dude, I admire your courage being able to reread something you like after being completely disgusted. When I bump into a major turn off I first try not to throw up, then I take a shower and then I usually stay away from erotic fiction for a few days. I guess i'm a little sensitive...

Don't get me wrong, I do enjoy Het fics every once in a while, hell, I used to write them, but I find ANY female anatomic connotations in slash fics so repulsive it makes me sick, and it does ruin the entire story for me, no matter how good it was before. I once read a fic, and somewhere in chapter 25 or something the characters finally have sex, and somewhere in the act the bottom starts ‘huffing like a woman in labor.’ I mean, what the fuck? Two guys are having hot and steamy sex, I don’t want to think about women giving birth! That is disgusting! I know it’s just one sentence but I never got over it, and I never went back to that story. So, no, don’t even get me started on Mpeg!

As for bad words and crude language, it all depends on the context and the setting of the story, and of course the characters. If you’re really getting into a story and suddenly you get turned off by one word, I think it’s either very misplaced, misspelled or anatomically incorrect. My running story concentrates mostly on inter-personal drama, so it's really not PWP, yet I frequently use very crude language. Why? I write in first person. My main character thinks in these blunt pornographic terms. Changing the terminology of his thoughts could only violate my character, thus my story… Besides, I don’t even want to try to come up with poetic synonyms for perfectly good words. A cock is a cock. Nobody ever told me I couldn’t say cock so I’ll say cock whenever I fucking want to! Okay, I do THINK in crude language… Sew me. (misspelling intended )

[Calanthee]

Pickey! Pickey! Pickey! Here I thought all Yaoi writers were chicks or chicks pretending to be guys/males, but appariently that's not the case anymore, there is possiblity that a few guys, perhaps with a particular persuasion are now writing Yaoi... well swell I am not predjudice... go for it boys have fun, but this terrible anti-vagina [anti-cunt for the crude] fascism must cease now before it get out of hand. This little damp hole you boys are mocking is simply another body part, necessary because it helps make babies, you boys don't need to go down on it... with such hatred! All body holes are equal, they just have different uses, after all the anal canal is not called the poop shoot for nothing.

Sometime I think more shit comes of people's mouths and minds than ever comes out the other end!!!

Just think about it! Yo will ya... please! And remember be kind to Vaginas, your mother had one too, for we all came through that particular gate when we were born, least you nauseous guys forget it!

Calanthee, for the Ethical Non-abuse of Vaginas

[Akari_Tenshi]

Most derogatory words referring to a body part in a sex scene piss me off, though I can deal with it. Also, leaving words incomplete or spelled incorrectly. Inaccurate grammar. The list goes on and on.

[yblue]

I really didn’t mean to say that female parts are disgusting, I like women and their damp holes. I honestly do! So please don't call me a fascist, I'm not.

What I REALLY dislike is people who try to make gay men seem like ‘girls with a penis’. If you like female body parts so much you can’t help mentioning them why would you write M/M fics? Why not simply write het fics? Or think up some androgenic shemale, I could live with that, at least then I know what I’m expecting, maybe I’ll even read it.

But if you write an incredibly realistic, real life, here and now fic, why not let guys just be anatomically male as they are in real life, and try to describe them as such? Ok, as a writer you do what you want, it’s your universe, and if in your particular universe male characters do get female body parts or something or they can miraculously get pregnant… For the love of all that is bright and beautiful, PUT IT IN YOUR SUMMARY and I’ll never come near you and we’ll all be very happy.

In the example above I didn’t mean to say woman in labor are disgusting, birth is a beautiful thing I suppose. I just really don’t want to think about it while reading a steamy scene of two guys having sex, just as I don’t want to think about my mother’s vagina. THAT is a turn-OFF.

[Akari_Tenshi]

I realize that, yblue. I'm only saying that derogatory words referring to male or female parts are disgusting to me.

[Calanthee]

This is Calanthee, for the Ethical Non-abuse of Vaginas... Again.

I do believe you boys and girls, are actually taking me serious! Don't do that ever, for I am never serious.... it's satire! I am making jokes. I only used the word fascist cause it sounded good, I wrote that post as a mothers day funny

I write Yaoi too, but unlike you guys I am fascinated by a little damp pussy occasional found hiding on a beautiful feminine male character in fantasy situation if only for the shock value, but not in reality based yaoi.

Some scientific theories suggests that man as species, might have developed from a duel gendered being called a hermaphrodite, a being which carries both male and female reproductive organs, and then at one point, the genders seperated. And this fact for me generates hippity-hoppoty plot bunnies galore. So shoot me, I am not a Yaoi purest in any way shape or form, yet I can be just as prejudice for "Yuri girl on girl" leaves me cold... it doesn't make me heave my cookies, I just don't read the stories. But I do read regular het stories once in while.

The rare Good writers can write just about anything and you'll read every word.

Remember we all come through the same gate, our loving mothers, Happy Mothers Day! Cal

[Clockwork_Knight]

Last I checked in an anatomy book, babies do NOT come out of human buttholes. Or penis. Yes, I said penis.

I've seen a few fic that had a full term baby come magically out of the poor bastards urethra. All I say is OWWWWWWW.

The thing that catches me the most on MPREG is where is the baby growing ?

The human male pelvis is not designed for a baby to get past in more then likely it will get stuck

Same goes for males magicly having a vagina for no reason other then the writer is a screaming fangirl.

[Calanthee]

"Oh Shit that really hurt! Damn-it to hell, I pissed out another baby again. Perhaps golly-gosh I should stop having sex with Elvis, Fred and the boys, for I can't tell who's the babies' real fathers are."

Morning sickness sucks too!

Yours Truly, the very lustful and productive, Cal

PS. One more baby and I'll have a triple hat trick, what can I say I am a team player

[yblue]

My apologies to Cal, perhaps I did take you seriously… I must have been sober for a few minutes.

I think once a man has given birth through his pissing canal - premising he didn't die of excruciating pain - he probably won't be able to use his cock ever again. So, that is how the tragic yaoi story ends. "Hey Travis looking good today.... Um, what are those rags between your legs? Ew… right, you're a 'daddy'. I just remembered I have to be somewhere..." I think a smart yaoi boy would opt for a caesarean operation…

Oh great! Now you have me thinking of a plot for a fucking Mpreg fic! I'd rather read necro or scat porn than lovey dovey boys with preggy bellies and morning sickness. I left the anime and the yaoi fandoms to escape the plague, but it appears it has even infiltrated the Original slash section just as well. There is no escape! We're all DOOMED! Mpreg has come to infest us all! Does anyone honestly get off on this shit? I mean does ANYONE really classify this under EROTIC fiction? Is it supposed to be 'cute' to have boys piss or shit out (human???) babies? FUCK! How can I write ANY decent smut now, thinking about this?

Edited May 11, 2009 by yblue

[Clockwork_Knight]

I think once a man has given birth through his pissing canal - premising he didn't die of excruciating pain - he probably won't be able to use his cock ever again. So, that is how the tragic yaoi story ends. "Hey Travis looking good today.... Um, what are those rags between your legs? Ew… right, you're a 'daddy'. I just remembered I have to be somewhere..." I think a smart yaoi boy would opt for a caesarean operation…

Oh great! Now you have me thinking of a plot for a fucking Mpreg fic! I'd rather read necro or scat porn than lovey dovey boys with preggy bellies and morning sickness. I left the anime and the yaoi fandoms to escape the plague, but it appears it has even infiltrated the Original slash section just as well. There is no escape! We're all DOOMED! Mpreg has come to infest us all! Does anyone honestly get off on this shit? I mean does ANYONE really classify this under EROTIC fiction? Is it supposed to be 'cute' to have boys piss or shit out (human???) babies? FUCK! How can I write ANY decent smut now, thinking about this?

That’s the way screaming fangirls are. I can't even try to imagine squeezing a HUMAN baby out my piss hole and I’m female. Just no. If he didn't die from the pain, blood lose or trauma then he won't even have a dick.

In the fic the baby CAME out of his penis. It Came out. And some how, just some how in the magical world it worked. I was too busy scrubbing my brain with Industrial Strength Brain Bleach to even consider reading more.

I see nothing cute or erotic about giving birth to a screaming, wet, pink blood covered thing out a hole the size of a lemon, or in the case of MPREG, much smaller.

Maybe the girls that write that stuff have issues with wanting a baby or something

[yblue]

I still can't believe you'd try to continue reading after THAT! You must have a stomach of steel. You have got to borrow me some of that Industrial Strength Brain Bleach, I sure could use it right about now!

And I'm a skirt, just like the rest of you. According to some people I have a man's brain (apparently meaning I'm shallow and sex obsessed) but I got all the other female parts at the factory. And no regrets, I know how to use 'em!

I do know a few guys who write slash, but it's true they're pretty rare. I like their stories, they're generaly to the point and I'm safe from screaming fangirl bullshit.

Edited May 12, 2009 by yblue

[Clockwork_Knight]

My stomach of steel came from dealing with all manner of bullshit from Role Playing. I've seen all kinds of things that would make most people gouge their eyes out.

I have a habit of avoiding most bad fanfics but there is always ones that start off pretty good only to end up with a really bad rape scene or a ' that doesn’t go there' kind of thing.' I can't stand bad rape scenes, its a pet peeve of mine.

Nothing traumatic like that should ever be taken lightly even if it fictional. No one wants a dick shoved so far up them its in their womb and just because the body reacts to stimulus doesn’t mean their enjoying it. A lot of the times some one won't get a hard on because it hurts to have something shoved up their ass with no to little prep.

[Miss_Lizbet]

I have a pretty high tolerance for just about any word, provided - and this is a big caveat - that it is used in an appropriate context. When reading a human anatomy text, I certainly don't want to be reading along and stumble across something like this:

"The vas deferens (plural: vasa deferentia), also called ductus deferens, is part of the male anatomy of some species; they transport hot come from the epididymis in anticipation of a scorching hot money-shot."

That being said, however, I would also not like to be happily enjoying a piece of erotica only to find this:

" Closing his eyes, the male moans and tightens his grip on your hair when the striated muscle tissue of your esophagus constricts in response to electrical impulses and creates pressure against his male organ of human reproduction, all of his momentary gentleness evaporating in the wake of the intensity of this sensation. He then begins to initiate coitus in your mouth, looking down at you as you take all of him in."

Now, I'm a pretty big fan of the verb "come", but it doesn't belong in my science text. And as one who can appreciate the complexities of human biology and read journal articles pertaining to the same, I don't want to see the word "penis" within ten miles of my erotica.

So, for me, it's all about how the words get used...not the words themselves.

However...I will say that if I see the word "juices" written anywhere, for my comfort, it had better be preceded by the word "fruit".

Edited July 24, 2009 by Miss_Lizbet

[Miss_Lizbet]

How about calling the breasts pillows?

Now that turned me off as I was reading a good smut and then the character reached up and gently squeezed her ample sized pillows. I was like uh, he squeezed her pillow? and it took me a while before I realized that they meant breasts!

But by the time I realized that, I had already left the story and went for another one. It just chased me off.

Beth

Haha. Wow...pillows? I'm sure I've seen that shaky euphemism used before in sub-par romance novels, but it's amusing to picture it intellectually barging in on 'a good smut'.