MorbidFantasy
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Posts posted by MorbidFantasy
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No argument. It's what Marvel has down to a science - making good movies that have superheoes in them - and what DC, Warner, Sony, and Fox have yet to figure out. I want the new Tomb Raider movie to be good, but we won't know anything about the quality of it until there's a script. *shrugs*
I really want to like Wynonna Earp. The idea is solid, the leads are decent at the whole acting thing and plenty hot, but the sexy pandering feels unearned. It's like there's two teams of writers, one of which is very good at drawing the best out of the concept, and the other of which is "our characters our idiots, but look at the softcore porn~!" I'm much more willing to watch bad movies than television, because a movie is an amusing diversion and a television show is a season.
Hell, I collect bad movies.
That's probably what I feel about the latest episode, which has some ridiculously vanilla soft-core betwen Wynonna and Doc Holliday. It was too gratuitous. I'd have believed it if they put that scene further in, maybe towards mid/end of season 1. Instead it's episode 5 and the semi-pedo smut commences. Like you said, the sexy times feels unearned. The one scene I did like was Wynona's seduction/interrogation of Waverly's fling. That was a way better character building scene than the most recent soft smut.
Latest chapter was cool. A little abrupt for James' end but still appropriate. A minor mistake would be calling the new stablehands "orphans" if their "mothers" are still alive and serving as maids. The Croft manor staffing overall was a bit less believable than Parmistan, where the culture made these sado-erotic behavior normal. Should probably include some detail about how the new hires also hailed from morally bankrupt cultures similar to the Parmistan youth.
If you do any followup stories outside of Reins Parmistan seems like a good setting to revisit, maybe with different characters and different plot premises.
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If they do a tomb raider movie they have to do it as a movie and not a "video game" movie. That's one of the biggest handicaps for all of these game IPs that make it to the big screen. All in all I'm always skeptical with these adaptations for the aforementioned reason. With that being said, I'm giving Vikander the benefit of the doubt until we have more information.
By the way, I happened across the new Wynonna Earp series (supernatural modern western). Have to say, Wynonna and her sister Waverly have got it going on in those tight jeans and jean shorts.
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Oh boy. The latest chapter had me recalling my own prison arc finale in FMC. Such utter unfairness and depravity. I like the creature cameos from the ponies' respective universes.
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Chapter 17 was nice. I liked the interactions between the race animals. However, I did wish to see more of a change in the rankings as well as more description regarding the track.
The last leg of the race should have more artificial obstacles, be it terrain or equipment. The handicap could also be more severe or more tiered. No need to have all five top placers have the same degree of handicap.
Maybe have "pit stops" where the animals have to each service a number of stable hands before being allowed to continue the race. The handicap or rigging here could be that the highest ranking animals are given stable hands notorious for long stamina, or who have been ordered to keep the animals preoccupied for at least a certain amount of time.
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I get it, so basically Parmistan is a fixed convergence point in multiple universe/continuities, but depending on who you are, when you travel out of it, you go to the continuity that you originally came from, so DC goes to DC, Marvel goes to Marvel, and Croftverse goes to Croftverse. This way you can also have multiple DC or Marvel universe/continuities to draw on.
It could be that Parmistan itself used to exist as many separate planes but through magic or science, all of those planes fused together into one, similar to if you had a bunch of parallel strings that usually never touched but then you pinched them together at one singular point with you fingers.
This also fixes plot issues outside of Parmistan, such as Resident Evil's zombie outbreaks not being a big part of other character's awareness.
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Hunterverse just seemed like the obvious categorical labeling, no thanks needed.
The hole is basically as deep as you need it to be. At first I was a little worried that you have too many potential outs now with any surviving super-friends of the racers wanting to rescue them. Then I realized that there are more than enough "reasons" why they couldn't be rescued.
1. Because they're dead (total defeat)2. Because they don't know where their sexy friends are
3. Because they don't know their friends are missing (life model decoy)
I should have guessed Mary-Jane. I totally forgot about "Tiger". Haven't seen Warehouse 13 or HTGAWM though and my only recollection of Carmen Sandiego was from that children's cartoon back in the 90's, so those three were never in my sights.
I was half serious about the whole "we" thing. Our pacing and writing styles are somewhat different so it might be jarring for audiences if we split up individual back stories. Then again, it might also keep it fresh.
My Ada Wong fic was also a capture/bondage/humil fic and it would be easy enough to rework it into a tie in for Reins. It would take around 5 chapters with the stuff I have scribbled down, but truthfully I would be just as interest to see how you portray Ada. We may very well have different perspectives on her character given how enigmatic she is in the games.Although I have a few ideas for the characters you've included, it all depends on if you're attached to certain continuities for those characters (e.g Arkham games for Selina Kyle or New 52 or whatnot) or if this is just a free style continuity given the universe mashups.
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Very nice work on your two latest chapters.
I get the Green Arrow references, although personally I would prefer to see Felicity Smoke kitted out as a pony girl - nothing against Speedy, but she's a bit of a waif. I can't imagine her really having the power to pull a chariot at a decent pace. Whereas Felicity has got some seriously nice, solid looking thighs and ass, not to mention them calves she shows off with her knee-length power dresses. Still, your story, your choice; just my preference there. Oh, and I'm guessing this is the old Ra's, who's now dead in the TV show's continuity, not Malcolm Merlin, since why would Merlin Ponyfy his beloved daughter am I right?
If we're going by visuals then yes Felicity is a little more beefier looking than Speedy, but take into account training and possibly the whole resurrected by pit of Lazarus thang and I think Speedy one ups Felicity.
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Chars I immediately recognized:
Nefaria/Katie
Wester/ScarletRoman/Gutters
Ra's/Speedy
Chars I had to look up:
Karin/DearestChars whose origins I have no clue to:
American/Innocent
Ivo/Karma
Parcelsus/Punky
Harry/Tiger
We should start a new miniseries here, maybe 1-2 chapter one offs, similar to my Philosopher's Stone series, that ties into this big race. You can even place it here in the TR section for ease of access as long as the first chapter is largely about Lara Croft or at least sets up the universe around Croftverse.
I've had an Ada Wong fic stewing on the after burner forever but seeing her her is motivating me to maybe give her another go, haha.
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I'd somewhat offer a correction that Ada Wong (unless I'm mistaken) isn't that petite, being 5' 7-8", which in fact is taller than Lara, who's 5' 5 1/2"
Is speedy the speedy we know from arrowverse TV? It might be helpful to include a list of the animals and their true names here for the uninitiated lol, since you've gone full Xover mode. -
Regarding "Reins of the Tomb Raider," MF said:
Chapter 13 was fantastic. Obviously Lara's not going to be serving out the full 10 years but so far she's spent upwards of 2 years in Parmistan. A good span of time for near permanent mental trauma. I really dug the day to day details, as usual, and how little she reacted to James, showing just how broken she was. Of particular interest is how the youngsters of Parmistan treat the "animals", how openly hedonistic they are.
A suggested edit would be regarding the details of the new plug in her front. I'm reading the plugs themselves are shaped like Bacchus and Poena, but wasn't entirely clear if the vaginal Bacchus plug also had hair on it, if it was separate from the pony tail plug, or how it's being held in (mechanical or by muscles alone).
It would be particularly interesting if Lara came into contact with other "service animals". I recall James seeing one during his initial visits to Parmistan, bu thusfar Lara hasn't had any interactions with ones such as herself, although I assumed that was because she was still in training.
She should race another such as herself, and if she loses (whether fairly or due to deliberate handicap), it might make for good detail.
Thanks, man. I figure Lara's mental fortitude would be tougher than most people's, but, yeah, two years of this sort of treatment is bound to leave a mark. I've got a way for Samus to deal with this kind of thing, but Lara? Especially post-reboot, sympathetic Lara? I don't see her coping well with this, not without some sort of exceptional outside help. Her therapist is not going to be enough, I think, but there are alternatives. All told, I think Lara's going to be stuck in Parmistan for three or four years, and then another six months or so outside Parmistan... but we'll get to that.
I'm also glad the small details are working; I'm trying to make the Parmistani people seem like a real nation with their own history and culture without distracting from the meat of the story. I'm glad the snippets are working out; the experiment here is really one of depth and perspective. The major deities of the Parmistani people are Neptune and Bacchus - Neptune was about as bad a rapist as Jupiter, and Bacchus was the god of drunken hedonism, so between the two of them you get a people that are very comfortable with sexuality, but have taken that comfort to a place that isn't especially healthy.
You're right about the plugs and the new harness - there's a chance for play there I missed entirely, and I'll have to do something about that in the next chapter. That should be fun. Thank you; I think I might work on that detail right now - it'll add a lot to what happens next.
Oddly enough, the next chapter will see Lara interact with service animals, and she'll be racing them in the chapter after that. I'm traveling a bit next week, so I should be able to finish this off while I'm gone, and then put out the next part of Bergman.
Since we're talking about horse racing, don't forget the "betting" aspect. Should also award some sort of tiered "prize" to trainers/handlers/owners or to the audience of the races. Something like the following:
1. Race event is multi-day, with a race followed by celebrations each day.
2. Ten ponies per race. Last 5 placers of each race are punished by being "public service animals" to the masses for post race celebrations. Top 4 are rewarded by the affections of VIP and nobles. 1st place is rewarded to the highest winning gambler of the race.
3. Each day after the first race, the top 5 winners from the previous days are given handicaps via restraints, with levels according to their placement the previous day. This is for "fairness" as the bottom placing five ponies will undoubtedly be more worn out from post-race celebrations than the top 4. The 1st place winner in particular has the heaviest of handicaps to deal with.
Races can be held with chariots, the "jockeys" being the individual ponies' trainers. The handicaps can be weights in chariots or even increased wheel axle resistance.
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2018? they set a release year?
Not sure where I read that date. I think it might just be speculation. Could be 2017 for all I know.
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TRINITY was still VERY active at the end of RISE. THEY killed Ana (post game credit scene) sniper - while Lara was pointing a gun at her. THEY let Lara live.
if you didn't know.
Yeah well the tomb raider reboot has been stated to be a Trilogy, so come 2018 We'll be seeing Lara wrap things up with Trinity, maybe.
Doesn't matter though; other than the mention of Yamatai and Sam, Hunter has left enough vagueness in his fic with regards to the time scale that we could feasibly fit both Rise as well as TR2018 in before Reins and still keep continuity.
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I can't believe I have found TWO men I. loath more than Fat Fuck: Alistair and Zip.
I LOVE his descriptions (he is a porn god) BUT how can BOOBS WRITER say that those two 'aren't too mean'? THEY ROBBED HER BLIND!
The last chapter Zip tells her "you could make. back your lost family fortune."
These two violated her trust. Compared to them, EVERY asshole here is a saint.
Um, ok? Not sure how to process this lol.
I think Boobswriter and I are going about our fics very differently. Not just in subject matter but in execution of characterization.
He's going for an almost cartoonish portrayal, which given the video game backdrop isn't necessarily a bad thing, especially now that he's throwing in DOA crossovers. Dare I say it, his fic is almost irreverent in its portrayal of the source material, which might urk canon-whores like me but definitely has its place in fanfiction writing. After all, if we were all canon-whores, like me, then we wouldn't be getting so many lovely M/M fics between Chris Redfield and Wesker, hahahaha.
Maybe that's why people hated Fat Fuck so much. I tried to take my fic in a more somber and "realistic" direction Ala batman dark knight rises, but as soon as I went that route, I exposed Gordo to a different level of scrutiny than would have mattered if I had kept things video-gamey. The more serious or gritty I went, the more boring "Fat Bastard" became, because he was at his core always a one note character, even after I gave him uber-tech-savvy with sex gadgetry.
Ok end thoughts. I'll try to get actual writing done on FMC and my new Naruto fic, lol.
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I'm thinking this would take place after Rise of the Tomb Raider - Lara's seen some stuff and dealt with Trinity and Ana, so they're about as much a factor here as the Solarii. Maybe even less. Regardless, James doesn't know anything about either group, and neither would Zamir. Turns out that this lack of knowledge is going to cost them.
As far as Caligula goes, yeah, dude was into the incest pretty hard, but he was also into anything that happened to be around pretty hard. I figure the Emperors of Parmistan are a bastard line, the result of a child that Caligula himself never knew existed, or a bunch of people that claimed the name without actually having the blood.
Ohhh didn't read this when I sent you the second pm. This time placement makes more sense. Disregard my second pm, haha.
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Regarding Regarding "Reins of the Tomb Raider," Burnsidhe said:
I dislike "bad end" and "revenge rape" stories. This is turning into one of the worse examples of both. The villain of the story is apparently flawless, his plans work perfectly, and he suffers no setbacks. He needs a setback. Estates have existing trustees. English law does not recognize legal documents signed under duress. All existing trustee has to do to overturn power of attorney is prove Lara is being held in degrading conditions. Videos leak. Pictures get taken.
Traditionally, so do I. It's one of the reasons I was having trouble with Masque'd Hawk; the idea that this sort of revenge is somehow right is so inherently flawed that it's difficult to know where to pick apart the logic. There's the old thing about digging two graves when you head out to take revenge, one for your target and one for yourself... and you've pointed out several of the flaws in James' plan. He's locally ingratiated himself into Parmistani power structures, but he's a short-sighted idiot who's hanging himself using a very long leash, and I didn't realize exactly how this was going to end until earlier in the week.
I could still bad end it, but that's not where this story is heading anymore. Would have been back in the original timeline, I think, but there's people that care about Lara in the survivor timeline and that makes all the difference. It also gives me a chance to play with some of the characters that Rise of the Tomb Raider didn't bother with, or only talked about in passing.
If yall are in to hentai, I'd highly recommend the "Dawn of the Silver Dragon Brigade" manga by Mukai Masayoshi, which you can find at various sources which I won't list here. That manga also had such potential, but also had a sort of bad bs ending where the women dominated just seemed to go along with it. That being said, the artwork and the earlier volumes (especially volume 2 of the total 4 in my opinion) is superb.
It's also why I'm 99% never going to write a truly "bad" ending where the bad guys win so thoroughly. While I enjoyed the mind control and domination of female protagonists, I find that since the bulk of the story is things going to shit, if we end on that as well then the whole story has no "period" to its arc, and comes out as just a open ended trek into oblivion. It's not quite a cliffhanger, but the feeling is similar.
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I sort of predicted James would spin things his way, but the way you wrote it really upped the mind-fuckery.
It's unfortunate you intend to end this story on a bad note, at least to me, who hoped Lara would have some light at the end of the tunnel. Will still read on though, cheerios.
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5 more. chapters? hy? I feel they are they all going to be repeats of chapter 10.Why the drawnout waiting?
Obviously James hasn't had his go at Lara yet and their reunion will probably be a dramatic one.
I plotted this out before sitting down to write and figured that was how long it was going to take to tell this story. I do promise not to repeat myself; the things that happen are based on a slow destruction of character within the confines of this story, so there's a descent that needs to happen over time.
The stuff that happens in the next chapter, for example, could not happen without the things that happened to Lara in this one. The stuff that happened in this chapter would make no sense without the chapter before it; I know it may look like Lara is at her lowest, but I assure you this is not the case.
Some of what's coming has been directly referenced by MordbidFantasy; again, without Fatman Chronicles, I don't think I ever would have started writing Bergman, never mind Reins.
Does that make sense?
It's the glorious cycle of inspiration inspiring more inspiration then looping back on itself. My next chapter in FMC will be using that same non-omniscient observer perspective you use in Reins. I used it a little back in the incarceration arc but it works here especially since I'm trying to wrap up the current arc as concisely as possible.
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Boy was this latest chapter one condensed piece of work lol.
I don't know why I do it, but I always have a 3000 word chapter count in my mind, which sometimes leads to overdrawn writing.
By passing over the "mundane" rape segments offhandedly and hitting the fast forward when appropriate, you do in 1600 words the work of multiple chapters. Kudos.
Although, I really would have liked to see in detail the first time the five farm hands escalated from what seemed to be mere petting and oral "marking" to full on mounting, and see Lara's physical/mental reactions to that. Sometimes you are too much of a tease.
Not that I'm asking for real spoilers, but do you have a plan to get Lara out of this predicament? -
BOOB WRITER = BITMAN717/PORN EATER?
Not sure. The new fic is definitely promising. I was toying around with a Sword Art Online fic with the same brainwashing/rewriting premise. This fic reminds me of that as well as the one from a while ago, the one with some videogamer somehow taking control of Lara via the game controller after entering her world or something to that effect.
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I read the first chapter. Iwas responding to FAN, not Hunter.
And who the fuck are you?
I am legend, I am myth. I am that which goes bump in the night. I am... YOUR PERVY UNCLE!
Ok didn't follow the train of conversation, so thought you were talking to Hunter. Disregard my previous trollolols.
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Enjoy it?
No threat to, or offence to you, but I'd smash your keyboard if I could.
Lawl. Why? If you don't like it than don't read it. Must be hard, you know, being forced to read stuff you don't enjoy. What is this, college? Trollolol
Ahh yes, a tale to reasure all fuckless wonders they are not alone in their hatred of all those mean women who find them tactless and creepy. ASSHOLES CAN WIN!!! YEAH MOM'S BASEMENT DWELING ME!
Are you the same colorful individual who left a string of oh so entertaining replies in my FMC discussion thread a while back? AM I NOT ENTERTAINED? IS THAT NOT WHY I'M HERE?!
On a serious note, looking forward to your TR entry, Hunter, but might I add that I'm still waiting on that Bergman Affair sexy times?
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The waiting for me part or being too ambitious for your own good part?
Being too ambitious, imagining a gigantic multichapter arc, then finding I don't have the time or energy to deliver.
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Story of my life, lol⤴⤴⤴Sorry for the lack of a swift update after chapter one. I actually have a later chapter finished but I'm having trouble with the bridging chapter(s). Already getting too ambitious for my own good on this one!
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feminism as a word is thrown around too frequently.
It's not like NC and abuse heavy fics like Hunter's or mine actually try to convince our readers that it is a good thing to hurt and dominate strong female characters. We don't exactly portray the rapists and abusers as heroic or righteous.
True feminism is believing that a woman's ideas, opinions, and values are to be held on equal footing as her male counterparts. Trying to attach feminism to arguments on a fan fiction site is a pretty big misappropriation.
Not to mention that if we were to complain about plot choices regarding story content, I would also have the right to criticize the number of "unrealistic" M/M pairings that saturate this place.... but I won't, because that's entirely up to the creative freedom of the authors here, which is what makes this place so awesome.
Metroid - the Bergman Affair feedback, comments, and workshopping
in General
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Forgot to mention that I dug your low tech no frills version of the pleasure suitcase. I had always intended mine for human trafficking and yours is exactly what I had envisioned for the majority of FMC's underground sex trade. The fancy one I had in FMC was for Lara and Lara alone.
I'm giving Wynonna Earp until end of season 1 to impress me. Usually I play shows on my second monitor while I do stuff on the main so it's not that bad of a time sink.
Used to watch Castle but fell away from that. Alexis in the later seasons was smokin' though. I also hear that Stana Katic is leaving at the end of this season.
Other than that it's the usual suspects. The Flash, Arrow. I got tired of Legends of Tomorrow four episodes in but might give it another go later.