Deadman

I’m hopeful that I can make it work. Although I’m still relatively new to the fandom, in terms of writing for the fandom. Been a fan of the series since the beginning. So I’m trying to navigate exactly what people like and don’t like. But I’ve read a bunch of stories here on AFF and I think my story is fairly consistent with some of the other stuff in the same fandom. It’s definitely really smutty though in terms of what happens.

Yeah, possibly it’s going to be an issue. But I think I can make it work. I’m making somewhat clear I think. I have for instance in the description “Then we went to work here”. So in the next chapter when they aren’t working there yet, I think it will be clear. Though I can’t be sure.

Sure but it wouldn’t fall under mind control in that situation, right?

Yeah, I probably will have to make it clear in some fairly obvious way that it’s non-chronological. I might just do an author’s note above the first chapter and/or all the chapters. But I do try and make things obvious in the beginning of each chapter. There’s usually a page or so of description setting up the character’s journey from canon to where the story is. Since many of them have different journeys.

My story sounds a lot more like your Jeff story than the Breeding Ground story that you’re outlining. I definitely don’t want it to go on too long. A smut circle also sounds similar in tone. Basically, there are five main female characters in a “villain wins” storyline who is playing with the female characters. Each chapter explores an individual character’s downfall. Yet some of the characters participate in other character’s downfall to a greater or lesser degree because they’ve already been corrupted or fallen.

You’re definitely making sense. Not completely clear what an episodic serial is exactly but it sounds potentially like what I’m doing. There are no characters dying. It’s more in the sense of characters preferences and ways of doing things. For instance, within canon I have a character that’s more mf oriented who becomes more mff oriented or characters who are ff oriented becoming mff oriented. Within canon they’re focused in one direction, in chapter 1 they are shown to be more open. Then in a future chapter I tell the story of how that happened. But I don’t explain it in chapter 1, I just describe in broad outlines things.

What about a story in which no magic or technology is involved? Just emotional and psychological manipulation.

You might be right in that respect. It’s not a time travel story but for context, here’s some of the broad details. The beginning of chapter 1 sorta goes from where canon ended to where the characters are now. For those purposes, I gloss over a fair amount of details about the things which happened in between canon and the story. Just enough to make chapter 1 work. However, later in chapter 1, something happens which probably needs an explanation. But the detour would be too much for the first chapter. Although the way I have it structured, that detail doesn’t get filled in until chapter 3 which is focused on the character it happens to. In between, chapter 2 fills in more of the details on what gets glossed over in chapter 1. I think readers of the fandom would understand why the details need to be filled in. The character who something happens to is different in certain ways from canon. But I’m putting in the work to explain it.

Well, I think within the context for the story, this isn’t the first time it would’ve happened. So they probably planned for it to be reinforced enough. Initially when I was thinking of it this was more in the sense of a dance rather than a sex act. Though the difference might not be all that much.

Interesting distinctions made there. Funny enough, I think both would fall under “More than Mind Control” based on the way it’s being described. Which I wouldn’t necessarily have thought makes sense for the one story. Although within the canon that I’m using for the show it’s more direct mind control. I’m playing with the idea a little more to make it fun. The second story is probably closer to direct mind control rather than “More than Mind Control”. Part of the reason I asked is for the purposes of tagging the story here. If both stories fall more under the “More than Mind Control” category, would that go under corruption or mind control for the purposes of tagging? Or should I just add both to cover my bases?

Where do you draw the line between the two? Some mind control is corruption and some is not in my view. I’m partly asking because of two stories that I’m working on. In one case it’s very clearly mind control but in the other it’s not so clear. One story involves magic being used for direct mind control. The other feels more like corruption but does sorta involve magical mind control. They’re just different kinds. The first is enchanting a magical object to control someone. While the second is someone with psychic abilities who uses it to encourage people to do what they want. Although over time the person on the receiving end tends to think more the way the psychic wants. Thoughts?

That’s a lot less obvious of a question as I probably made it. I’m looking for thoughts about what should work logistically. I have a story involving two women giving a performance for a couple guys. There’s a booth involved where a bunch of guys are sitting to watch the performance. For some reason, I made the booth elevated from the regular floor. It just made sense so I wrote it that way. Now I’m trying to figure out how the performance itself should go. They could either do it on top of the booth’s table or on the floor in front of the booth. What do you think makes the most sense?

Author: Deadman Title: Betty and Veronica: Fuck Buddies Summary: Betty and Veronica's relationship changes when they go out for a fun evening with their friends. They decide to explore how much it has changed on a trip to the cabin with Archie and Jughead. Feedback: Happy to have feedback or suggestions. Fandom: Riverdale Pairing: Threesomes/Moresomes Warnings: 3Plus AFFO Anal Angst Bi DP Exhib FF Fingering HJ MF Oral PWP Solo Spank UST Voy WIP Solo story or chaptered story: This is a multi chaptered story. URL: https://tv.adult-fanfiction.org/story.php?no=600100016

Author: Deadman Title: Betty and Veronica: Fuck Buddies Summary: Betty and Veronica's relationship changes when they go out for a fun evening with their friends. They decide to explore how much it has changed on a trip to the cabin with Archie and Jughead. Feedback: Happy to have feedback or suggestions. Fandom: Riverdale Pairing: Threesomes/Moresomes Warnings: 3Plus AFFO Anal Angst Bi DP Exhib FF Fingering HJ MF Oral PWP Solo Spank UST Voy WIP Solo story or chaptered story: This is a multi chaptered story. URL: https://tv.adult-fanfiction.org/story.php?no=600100016

Serpent Trials Chapter 9 is up Summary: In order to be with Toni, Cheryl has joined the Serpents but her initiation is incomplete. Like all new members, Cheryl has to go through the Serpent Trials which are different for potential female members than they are for men. Thankfully, Toni is there to help her through it. https://tv.adult-fanfiction.org/story.php?no=600099980&chapter=9

Serpent Trials Chapter 9 is up Summary: In order to be with Toni, Cheryl has joined the Serpents but her initiation is incomplete. Like all new members, Cheryl has to go through the Serpent Trials which are different for potential female members than they are for men. Thankfully, Toni is there to help her through it. https://tv.adult-fanfiction.org/story.php?no=600099980&chapter=9

I’m curious about how much you focus on a story being linear versus non-linear? I have this story I’m playing with where I’m thinking about a story that isn’t necessarily linear in its story telling. For example, I’ve seen most stories involve Chapter 2 being in the future from Chapter 1, and Chapter 3 being in the future of Chapter 2, etc. A direct linear story. However I’m playing with an idea for a character driven story where chapters aren’t told in a linear way. Such as a character driven story where Chapter 3 happens 6 weeks before Chapter 1, and Chapter 2 might happen 3 weeks before Chapter 1, but you still read Chapter 1 first. It’s just that you learn the context for the things which happen in Chapter 1 in later chapters. Why certain characters feel the way they do about other characters and why they acted the way they did. Am I making sense or just saying random stuff?

There is a fairly good chance that the main character would mention them. They do have a canon history of sorts with the character, although I don’t know if within the continuity of the story I’m writing that canon history has happened. The character which would be mentioned is more of a background/secondary character within canon. All of the main story characters I’m working with are the main characters within canon.

Well the more I talk about it, the more I feel like Jane should be included in some form in the sequel. It might actually work well given how the first story is structured. Most chapters include a character from the previous chapter before moving onto a new character. So perhaps I could include Jane in the most relevant character’s chapter before having them leave.

I suppose I could add another but that’s not the plan in any sense. At least within the context of the story, Jane would be involved in between the current story I’m writing and the sequel. But I appreciate the insight on how I could mention it.

I may simply mention Jane in the sequel as someone who just isn’t around in the moment.

Definitely good to know.

Well, it’s less of a way to get rid of them. It’s for AFF, so it’s more like: “When is Jane going to join in on the fun?” But then the sequel doesn’t have Jane in it at all. Even though Jane is mentioned in the last chapter of the story. However in another chapter I do mention Mary and she does appear in the sequel. Since having the idea to mention Jane though, I have considered making her part of the sequel, but that could over complicate the story. Which has been pretty straight forward up until now.

So it wouldn’t necessarily bother you if there was dialogue about certain characters but never show up?

Kinda curious how you feel about mentioning characters who aren’t going to appear in a piece. A story I’m working on is almost finished. I have plans for a sequel but in the final chapter, I’m possibly going to mention characters who don’t appear in the sequel. You could however reasonably conclude based on the way these characters are mentioned that they would be part of the sequel. But I’m concerned that this might give people a false expectation about what the sequel is about. I’ve mentioned other characters in stories but it makes sense for the characters who are in the story to have them brought up. Just for clarity, it’s a story featuring FF pairings and some of the characters have or did have boyfriends at one point. These former boyfriends get mentioned. However in the final chapter, I mention other female characters who aren’t going to appear. This is a slightly different thing. I don’t know if I want to misdirect readers in this way. There is one mention of characters who will appear in the sequel but it’s not in the final chapter. So it may not work. What do you think?