pippychick

I think it depends whether you’re reading straight up porn or erotica, since erotic writing is more character driven, and that tends to be what I want from my fanfiction, when I consume it. In any case it’s extremely rare to see multiple orgasms written well, but that’s just my opinion.
I’m not sure you’re asking the right question. If I’m answering this as a reader, and you’re the author, I’m countering with: how did you hook me into your story? Was it the promise of porn/sexual gratification, or something more? Did you make me curious about the consequences/aftermath or make me want more? Because those things are the job of the author. If you hook me right, I will read it.

Tragic endings with a hint of nightmare and a dash of infinity.
Wow I’ve written like three of them, just like that. Damn.
 

“Endings?”  What are these “endings” you speak of? 

For me, it depends on what I’m writing. Publishers tend to want happy-ever-after endings or at least happy-for-now endings. So, if I’m going to submit what I’m writing to a publisher, I try for at least the HFN ending.
When I write for myself, I’m much less inclined to write happy endings. I’m never quite sure life has a happy ending in most cases, although I’m firmly in the camp of life having happy bits throughout. But I think how people cope with adversity that doesn’t resolve neatly is far too interesting not to write it.

Hmm.. maybe I’m just too cynical (I am getting old now!), but I believe that characters, like people, are mostly selfish. That’s the most realistic flaw you can write into any character, whether they’re yours or not. Sure, they all have moments of altruistic selflessness, as do we all, but I really think at the end of the day the great majority of the world goes around thinking about itself. And usually in quite a small way too, rather than master!villain selfishness. ie. worrying what other people think is probably pretty high up there for most people. Sad but true. I don’t exclude myself from that either.
Whether a character is redeemable or not (let’s imagine they have a more major flaw for a moment) is an entirely different kettle of fish. I don’t think the two are necessarily connected. Bad things happen to good people, the same as they happen to bad people, and vice versa. Doesn’t mean anything. Doesn’t make them better, or worse, than they were before said event. I like irony. I like it when characters doom themselves in surprising ways, and make traps for themselves, sometimes millennia in the making, and they still don’t see it coming. That satisfies my evil muse.
The problem with redemption is that it’s largely a mythical concept. Kind of like: everywhere you go, there you are. You can’t escape yourself. No character is redeemable in that sense. Ok, so a character could maybe stop doing a load of despicable stuff like murder, rape, dismemberment etc. But unless they’ve had some kind of drastic conversion that’s changed them completely into someone else, underneath they’re still pretty much the same dickhead, they’re just.. well.. dry drunk. Sorry, I can’t think of any other easier, short way to describe it.
And then there’s the outside world, and how that can interact, because characters don’t live in a vaccuum. I said I like irony. The redemption of characters can be argued for or against, but if they then go and damn themselves via what is generally supposed to be one of their “good” qualities – what then? Or better still, if on the path to some kind of “redemption” they’ve gotten hold of the very instrument of their doom… then what? If the character really deserves their fate, taking into account everything they’ve done, isn’t that kind of balancing?
Sorry if I wandered off topic a little. I tend to do that a bit.

39550….
There!

Omg, well done…. I’m going to enjoy this. Got it on amazon.

Omg, well done…. I’m going to enjoy this. Got it on amazon.

My book is for sale! Release date will be on the 7th
Cold Snap
M/M horror/romance
 
Summary: A lifetime of bad experiences has left Iddy homeless and wary of shelters.
Rumors of a monster hunting the city streets at night surface, but between the cold and predators of the human variety, Iddy has more important things to worry about. That is until he comes face-to-face with the monster and survives. Now, it has him in its sights.

http://cherylzwrites.com/2019/08/13/learn-to-submit-the-wrong-way/
This made me laugh so thought I’d share it!
Sample:
I swear someone on AFF has already written that :p
 

Thank you @InBrightestDay
I’m really glad this chapter worked, and that Nina’s feelings about it all came across so well.
Yes, the potential for her getting pregnant is a worry, and both of them need to take that more seriously than they are right now.
As to the isolation, I suspect the must be some way for Nina to contact the outside world, just as I’m equally sure she’s keeping the knowledge of how to do so all to herself, for her own purposes (kind of like how she didn’t tell Ray her mobile/cellphone only worked at school).
I am glad you’re rooting for them. There is something quite deep going on here, even if neither of them realise it yet.
Thank you again!

Apologies for doing all the reviews so quickly, but I wanted to get caught up before the next chapter was posted.
Oh, age difference isn’t really a problem.  I mean, my longest running story (which I have vowed to finish by the end of July!) features an eighteen year old boy paired with a fourteen billion year old woman, so compared to that Ray and Nina are practically the same age.  The thing that made me uncomfortable during Chapter 2 was really just the question of how consensual this was.  The whole reason the age of consent exists in the first place, after all, is that sometimes younger people are mentally more vulnerable to being forced or manipulated into sex, and I misunderstood what you were doing with Nina’s thought process and thought Ray might be coercing her into sex, which was where the Bad Touch feelings popped up.  Of course…
...that was the key component I was missing, that it was Nina thinking “Wait, what am I doing?” rather than “Wait, what is he doing?”  The subsequent chapters did a lot to change my mind on the pairing, and definitely reassured me that Ray is ultimately a good guy.
Yeah.   I’m definitely going to have to check out more of Melrick’s work in the future!
I was just joking.  When it comes to what one finds aesthetically pleasing, it’s all a matter of personal preference.
Definitely.  I imagine the titular awakenings are more Nina’s, as a pubescent girl just now experiencing sexual attraction for the first time, though it could to some extent apply to Ray, I suppose.
Again, that was mostly intended as a joke, though my reaction was kind of like:
Me: Okay, I’m genuinely starting to accept that this relationship could work.  For this story, I think I’m getting over the “fourteen year old” thing.
Ray: Even if she were 13…
Me: Don’t push it, man.
I think I will.  In spite of my reaction to Chapter 2, I actually am rooting for these two now.

Sorry for the misunderstanding!  I felt bad leaving the reviews that fast myself, so I read your statement wrong partly out of guilt.  I will definitely continue reading!

“Hey sis! How’d it go with that new girl?”
“I hoped her touch would be amazing because she’s a musician.”
“And?”
“She only plays the theremin.”

Thank you so much, @JayDee – I’m so glad you liked it. I’m glad you noticed the comparison of playing the instrument and the lover. They both do involve a kind of purposeful caress.
 

lol… I’ve only just realised how that sounds. Of course I meant I hope you will continue reading!

And lastly… for now, hopefully…
lol… I will not say a word about breasts, or we’ll be here all day.
But they are kind of equal in being awkward, so I’m glad that comes across. Ray is extremely lonely, and he’s not having an easy time of it even without having a girl throw herself in his way... and Nina is so terribly curious. “Goddamnit Ray” made me laugh though. 
I hope you enjoy the rest
Thank you so much!

Thank you for this one too!
I’m glad that their communication made you feel better about them. Well, he has been worried about those consequences, so they’ve been at the front of his mind. Even though Melrick and I are really making him go there. He doesn’t mean to do any harm.
Ah… Melrick made you laugh… (points)  
 

Hey again, and thank you!
Well… I think she was more frightened of herself just then. She hasn’t been in any situation like this before, but she’s also very daring. It’s amazing how easy it is to get right out of your depth… lol. Silly Nina! But Ray is a good guy really. He’d never hurt her or deliberately scare her. He’s not thinking rationally at all right now.
 

Hey, @InBrightestDay and thank you so much!
Thank you for reading, even if it is out of your comfort zone. I’m entirely responsible for Nina’s age, and it’s interesting to think back and imagine what she would be thinking and feeling. But we wanted to try and write about two characters first and foremost, so if you do stick with it, be prepared for this to go a lot deeper.
As for Ray, he absolutely does realise, and I think ordinarily nothing would happen here. But this is fiction, so we are just having a little fun as the Gods of this world, and watching what unfolds, so I’m really happy that it seems to be just happening, rather than being forced. I hope you will root for Ray and Nina by the end. Together, they are more than their age difference

Hey, @InBrightestDay and thank you so much!
Thank you for reading, even if it is out of your comfort zone. I’m entirely responsible for Nina’s age, and it’s interesting to think back and imagine what she would be thinking and feeling. But we wanted to try and write about two characters first and foremost, so if you do stick with it, be prepared for this to go a lot deeper.
As for Ray, he absolutely does realise, and I think ordinarily nothing would happen here. But this is fiction, so we are just having a little fun as the Gods of this world, and watching what unfolds, so I’m really happy that it seems to be just happening, rather than being forced. I hope you will root for Ray and Nina by the end. Together, they are more than their age difference

Thank you so much, Melrick
I really love that piece of music and the character of the duet. I hope I wrote something to do it justice.

Well, that depends… what exactly do you expect to get from being redeemed? Absolution? I don’t have any kind of faith, so I’m afraid that’s out for me personally. *g*
If a character has done bad stuff, there’s not much they can do about it but resolve to do better the next time that situation presents itself, but it’ll always be something they did. In terms of story, it’ll always be part of their background. It’ll be on their sheet, so to speak. And that’s not dissimilar to life. A blank slate is impossible. Forgiveness might be feasible, but then again in my eyes even that might not save a character.
Say at some point in the past a character has committed a murder, or even some stupid petty crime like a theft. They might spend the rest of their lives (in the story) doing the right thing. They might do more good than all the other characters put together, but that initial crime is still impacting upon everything they do, not just altering them, but altering the whole storyline around them in its turn. And because of that, it’ll always come back to get them. Everything in a story is significant, even a dropped handkerchief. Going on from that, every action a character takes is significant, and redemption is a cheat. It’s an attempt to delete the handkerchief. It’s already written. It’s already done. There’s no changing it. There’s no escaping it. There’s only dealing with it and writing the consequences of it right up to the very end, whatever those consequences turn out to be. 
To redeem a character in those terms… impossible. It’s like Astinus says to Raistlin. You may as well throw a pebble into a fast flowing river. It changes nothing. History continues.

For They Bounce
I wrote that story right after my dad died of lung cancer, so there were a lot of emotions going around my head at the time.  I have to say, it’s perhaps one of the favourite things I’ve written, even though it’s so short.  Thank you for reading and reviewing. 

They do say that writers should write what they know. That’s why I write about a werewolf. No exactly, that’s what the codes are there for! There’s about half the Minor2 stuff I’m fine with and half I avoid, but I’d never criticise folks who do want to write or read it. You’ve both got a good story starting there and I hope it gets a lot of reads and reviews.
Also, about the setting – I genuinely thought I’d somehow mis-read the summary it’s easy to miss a word if you’re reading fast, and purely coming from some of your past stories I’ve read being set in Britain I had that mental image. After both kilometres and arse had appeared I figured it had to be the land down under instead, but until then I wasn’t sure.