Anesor

If the story was never finished or never quite gelled, restarting from scratch and keeping the best bits is fine. But I do think editing after it's been posted is fine as long as it doesn't get obsessive reworking, never being satisfied. Get the book out the door someday so you can explore new stuff. Also, I've seen a few tales where a more mature writer redid the story and it was weaker and less edgy/powerful. I've seen this in both sci-fi and romance novels, though I'm sure there are more examples. Writing as a more mature writerm the voice is more assured and sometimes loses that uncertainty a newer writer shows. On the other hand, an occasional corrective edit I don't see a problem with. Fixing grammar, spelling, or stupid "Duh" moments can only improve the story. I want the story to grab my reader, and if my embarrasing grammar errors prevent that, fixing them is only good. I don't restructure, just the kind of fixing a good copy editor would have pointed out the first time. But finding help is hard, and they miss may miss things too. If i see them on a corrective edit a year or 2 later, how is that different than a series of editors checking before a book is published? But I do think you shouldn't make major changes, or very few. I tend to think of mine like books that went to the publisher. you may be able to make a couple passes of changes in galleys, but once in the readers' hands they shuold be really changed in any fundamental way. Retconning, like they do in comics, is really starting to annoy me as it's a cheap way to redo old stories instead of writing new stuff. So major changes should be approached with caution if at all, and smaller changes are slow-motion copy editing. If I ever get published in paper, the printed copy is pretty final, right? After a certain point the book has to go out the door.

More fun than buying a sword in a stone... Darn, I'm not queen of the realm yet.

I signed up for welfare, and decided against staying on it. Then someone who remains generous donated so I no longer qualify. But my welfare page says I've gotten zero, but I can't repay that and there's no visible option to unsign-up.

Fairy Slayer commented: I'm really not sure how to answer this comment as a whole. There is very little action in the story, almost all of it is setting and character. Just a faire worker who's struggling with life and cold weather, having something odd happen. (Workers at those booths don't make enough to survive on that work alone.) I could have skipped naming extras, but that is a gripe of mine that too many other people in amateur fics are nameless, not even acquantances of casual friends. Leaving off the few named people would have made Ruth too much a stranger in her own job/world. The threat of stinging critters to staff and customers was a hazard at the fairs I went to, I really want that detail for the setting's authenticity. I'm not sure how much more detail I can include, when the entire flash was Ruth working the cold end of a renaissance faire and her being shocked by a weird sand painting she made. What was missing then?

I'm replying to the reviews of the short, short story "An Early Chill" here. I expect more drabbles will continue her story in the future. Sand was a nice prompt to help gel the character/setting, as I remember the bottles of layered sand sold at the local Renaissance faire in mostly neon colors. It also gelled with the sand paintngs of the navaho, and even the ephemeralness of chalk painings on the sidewalk. This first version came quickly, and posting correctly is slow for me, so there will be edits in the next few days. pittwitch said: Thanks! I wanted to do something different than beaches, and thought of colored sands. There should be more, especially if future prompts lend to the overall story in my head. Apollo, the site god, said: Thanks! Though this is my second prompt, as I did the ending one too, but this is my first original piece since teh mid-80's. I'm sorry I was a little too terse in my phrasing. It may be the typing, or perhaps a little too much adhernce to a writer's advice I took to heart a long time ago. He said write your story and cut 20% out. I cut too much out, as the revisions of a 57k word story took it to 80k after I put descriptions in. I plan to fix these tonight or tomorrow. I'm planning to do prompts when the word and concept is in some way integral to what I write. Or at least try. Melrick commented: I've been to three different faires, and they actually can vary a lot. I even was a kind of Ren rat for three years, evne if I almost never wore the garb. I did though do a riff/prank with and to a couple of the actors on one closing day, and one friend has a booth so I hear a lot of the backstage stuff too. You should see one once, just don't expect anything resembling accuracy at any of them. I hadn't seen anything before I posted, but I will be revising per Apollo's comments real soon. Thanks for the review!

Pen name: anesor Story: An Early Chill (Sand prompt) Link: "An Early Chill" story link Review responses: answers and comments Type: Flashfic Fandom: Original Pairing: Original Warnings: AFFO, Language, NoSex

I think a lot of us here have hopes of being someday published, and seeing a print copy of our hard work in a book store and being able to say "I'm a professional writer." But along with the greater freedom in finding small on-demand presses, listing on Amazon, and e-publishing will be a proliferation of sleazy types who want your money or efforts, in return for some phantom benefit. I'd heard about some of these at a Worldcon and the like, but realized many here would not have. This started earlier today when I got an email from an online greeting card company 123Greetings, which I often use for occasional cards to people I know online. Keep in mind I have no detailed account there, so they know nothing about me. The subject was "You've Been Selected for Inclusion in the Cambridge Who's Who." My first thought was 'How could Cambridge anything think that?' I haven't worked professionally in years, and I wasn't ever what would be called executive. Then reading the text it was more obvious what it was. And a quick check found confirmations plenty(1). Aside from the card company helping with the scam I found that one of the attempted victims was harvested from a writers' group insurance list. I'd heard horror stories at SF writers at conventions of scam agents, vanity publishers, etc. A spin-off of the SFWA, Writer Beware(2), is set to identify and warn members and the general writing community of the scamming. These things depend on using new writers as a continuing supply of fodder for revenues. Just like the Cambridge Who's Who uses Trump on the board to make the buyer feel validated and that they are about to make the big time, these things play on our hopes. Please read some of the Writer Beware material if you plan to publish. (1) Here's the info on the Cambridge Who's Who Scam, where you pay to be included in an honor. And unlike the Hollywood Walk of Fame, the general public will never see this honor, unless they got sucked in too and bought the book. While Cambridge Who's Who is easily checked with an informative listing on Wikipedia, there are a lot more fishing for your money and hopes. (2) Writer Beware is s service by the Science Fiction Writers of America, a genre which has a long history of mutual support and encouraging new writers. Many there started in fanfic, or even dabble in it still. One NaNoWriMo encouragement letter in November from Merceded Lackey said that she did some fanfic recently. They have a blog for current issues and lists of agencies and publishers to look out for at Writer Beware home page. Be sure to read about the case studies and alerts for writers, it really is another kind of Hall of Shame...

Body of review from Apollo follows: This story being NWN2 almost reaches incidental to being the plot events listed, only the reviled 'rocks fall, everyone dies' adds the final straw. But if you add all the orders and tragedies in other games, it might make the same outcome sometimes. I would like if more games dealt with the psychological costs of mayhem. I am very glad it works for those who don't know it! Thanks for the review!

Shadow Knight intoned: Thank you very much. I know losing someone is rough, but the lead loses everything, especially in the finale and bridge to MOTB. How could the devs honestly think a real person would handle that? It's not a continuation, like life, but a grinding annihilation of the lead. Thanks again!

Fairy Slayer commented: Actually, all but one of the pronouns refer to different people in the story. Everyone tells us what we have to do in the games, that we're often being very much railroaded. I'd better tweak that. (good thing it's short enough I'll still be well under the limit:) ) Thanks for the review!

JayDee said in a review: Thank you. I may have to tweak it though, as the heroine's quest succeeded, the big bad was stopped. But she was left broken and emotionally defeated, even if luck and destiny did defeat the threat. The character, if a real person, might not be able to endure the traumas of surviving. Games assume there is nothing like PTSD and despair, and that the leads can continue on forever like automatons.

BronxWench said Epic heroes are one thing, but they should be more worn by the unending combat and emotional strain. Addicting can be cool, but I doubt this'll be weekly for me. Thanks for the review!

Pen Name: anesor Story link: They Told Me... Review replies link: review replies Type of fic: Flash Rating: Adult Fandom: Neverwinter Nights Pairing: N/A Warnings: Angst, COMPLETE, Death, MCD, Oneshot

As a reminder for readers distracted by the holidays, it would probably work as an ad. However, as a marketing ploy to tempt mew readers it fails utterly. For people who don't buy many books, it does make the author lame and far too likely to resort to cheap stunts in the story too. For non-readers, it's boring. A couple local actors with an interesting scene would hook new readers better. Foe mystery fans who don't know the series, it doesn't say anything that says why this is a good mystery. Like AC wakes up on a dinghy in Lake Michigan with a body. And for people who like series fiction, the author is saying that the series is ending soon, no matter the sales, because the author doesn't give a shit about his creation anymore... It's all about manipulation of readers and not about telling a good tale, capital "L" losers all around. There are so many other ways to advertise, without advertising these sleazy subtexts.

Does that mean the story is always shooting its mouth off?

Many of these comments are great, especially the one about aliens eating brains, but the original theory was jealousy. For some it may be that, but I detest Sues who have love interests or places I have no interest in. I think it's more how they destroy and devalue the concepts and characters of the setting as they pass through. I'd be like that chess game where the pawn starts flying because of the rainbow coming out of her butt and all the board bow down to her for no reason after all the royal pieces dance the jitterbug. They break the setting along with the supporting cast. Oh, there's plenty of other symptoms, but they warp the original story/setting so much to make their sue. Some seem to feel they're entitled to have good things happen, like winning the lottery without buying a ticket or other characters fall over themselves to adore and make things easy and convenient. Little effort, and solutions are handed to them while they emote over the problem they're wallowing in. Real people and characters have to find their own solutions and work for them, even if some of the drudgery is off camera. Some are so busy whining, that even messages from gods isn't enough for them to get off their butts, and the author doesn't even see anything wrong with that. And yeah, the lobotomies to the supporting cast, so they lose all skills, intelligence, and morals to make a Sue more needed is sad. It does date to the original Ensign Sue, but who'd want a Spock who's no longer intelligent and competent? Sue is usually callous to the quirks and needs of their friends and love interests, which is strange as isn't the LI why they wrote the story? The Sue also often does smack downs of all potential romantic rivals, even if there is no reason as they have to like the Sue. This is where the youth of many writers shows the most, as making enemies is usually stupid. Possibly the worst thing is that there are no consequences when they screw up or do mean things. They can break promises, violently lose their temper, attempt rape, threaten to kill someone without cause, ignore the world rules for their race/profession, and just plain be bad and they never get any kind of repercussions. While that does happen in real life, I think most people get annoyed to enraged. Hating Sues is an expression of perhaps the universe's rage that karma is being denied. Sooner or later there are consequences for when you do these things, and the Sue skates by.

ladywater: Thank you thank you for the review! Yeah, He will be one of the major POV characters in my other tale, Choices, to be posted soon. It's sometimes disconcerting when he comments on thing IRL.

While I fell into fanfic just over three years ago, I hadn't considered posting here as I was already posting at the Pit and I'm not that interested in graphic materials, blame it on Georgette Heyer if you want. I'd read "Ceald Amothien" over there and then told some others that more of it was here, but I was just a bit too comfortable. I got less comfortable as fewer and fewer tales were written by and for adults, with more issues than spillikins and not dealing with the larger issues and consequences when characters screwed up. I will admit freely that BronxWench sucked me in more definitely here, so blame her. I'm playing catchup for a while, moving stories over here with a quick pass to remove some typos when I do. As I'd managed to just pass a couple hundred chapters bear with me while I add them. This is the first sidestory of the Choices series and takes place before the official campaign begins, though it is pretty independant. I wanted to give some more background for Casavir, a triubled, but good man at this point. As my main story really only starts in the collapsing cavern under the Meredelain, the events of the OC are still canon, even though it becomes an AU later than this sidestory in that cavern. If you want to read the next story in chronological order, it will be "Riddles," starting tomorrow. A lovely thank you to my reviewers! :waves: BronxWench: Yeah, even if you look behind at unused material, Casavir is in a very grim place, even if he has not lost favor. There had to be some kind of reason why he doubts himself that much and follows the KC right away, other than programming. wanderingaddict: Unfortunately paladins should be a much richer source of real drama that most writers manage... Not the 'does he really wuv me and even give up his life or sex, but the issues of a strict moral standard in a world just as full of grays. He's actually more than a little a rebel because he left his post to help the 'little people.' He was uninteresting because they only wrote his dialog lawful stupid. (and a forty-something guy pursuing a girl who's 17-18 is morally questionable now) He should be a rich source of angst and subplots, as Falling isn't a joke if you have touched your god. I would like to smack the designers because they could have tapped free writers like us to fill in dialog or plot if they didn't want to pay. A tee-shirt and pin would be enough to get the better fan writers to write reasonable subplots and dialog, even as a patch. But you have to have designers who are willing to admit they dropped the ball badly and should fix it. Pallies need love too. Any other questions or comments, and I'd love answering them here!