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  1. Today
  2. What I said: “7 oz can of chipotles in adobo.”

    What the phone heard: “7 oz can of Chipotles in a dildo.” 

    Even my grocery list is not safe.

    1. Desiderius Price

      Desiderius Price

      Maybe the phone’s daydreaming about a bottle of Chipotle sauce being used as a dildo?

  3. Yesterday
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  13. Never trust any book with a tagline or summary of this would make Lovecraft scared.

    Lovecraft is not a viable reference of fear. Man was afraid of Penguins, Air Conditioners and the Welsh.

     

     

    1. BronxWench

      BronxWench

      Now I need to know the name of this book! :lol: 

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  26. 45539! Behold the turning of the wheel and back again! Hark!
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