Sinfulwolf

Well, it’s only polite when reading someone’s work to leave something at least. 
But yes, a little touching on the military certainly goes a way into world building. I don’t think JayDee really played with that aspect cause the world building took a second seat to the act of that the story was displaying really. 
But yes, the soldiers with some preparation should be much better trained and prepared.
I’ve been tinkering with some ideas of sloth based demons and monsters for a bit, so I feel the difficulties there in trying to put it out there as being associated with that particular sin while also being a viable threat. But the slug design and bone plates really sold the image.
Glad I was able to help somewhat.
I’m glad ye had that thought. Cause holy hell, nothing mucks up an operation like a bunch of people running around thinking they know what they’re doing yet not having a clue. While Luzurial confronting Kevin would have made me smile, it’s good you didn’t cause that could have been hurtful. No one likes having their pride poked at. Especially by the pretty girl you slept with and wanna protect.
There’s a lot of reasons why Kevin acts the way he does, down the cultural ones, love, etc. etc. etc., and you have made good points and listed them. But… after all the times it’s brought up Luzurial is an arch angel, and how strong she is despite not being at full strength, it comes across really thick as a kind of male pride thing in Kevin’s behaviour. It’s part of his character for sure, but it’s also a little sad that nothing’s gunna change much in the next 75 years in regards to viewing women as the one’s that always need protecting on all those levels.
There are reasons it could have happened sure, but it’s something that really popped out to me. Especially after promising an arch angel that these kids would be protected.
Guess it all comes down to ROEs, which you’ve only slightly dabbled in. But considering the world ending threat, I kinda figure the thing should have gotten a few rounds up the grill and hood… I’ll try not to mention all the machine guns and such.
And I am looking forward to seeing the conclusion.

Well… we’ll see.

Well, it’s only polite when reading someone’s work to leave something at least. 
But yes, a little touching on the military certainly goes a way into world building. I don’t think JayDee really played with that aspect cause the world building took a second seat to the act of that the story was displaying really. 
But yes, the soldiers with some preparation should be much better trained and prepared.
I’ve been tinkering with some ideas of sloth based demons and monsters for a bit, so I feel the difficulties there in trying to put it out there as being associated with that particular sin while also being a viable threat. But the slug design and bone plates really sold the image.
Glad I was able to help somewhat.
I’m glad ye had that thought. Cause holy hell, nothing mucks up an operation like a bunch of people running around thinking they know what they’re doing yet not having a clue. While Luzurial confronting Kevin would have made me smile, it’s good you didn’t cause that could have been hurtful. No one likes having their pride poked at. Especially by the pretty girl you slept with and wanna protect.
There’s a lot of reasons why Kevin acts the way he does, down the cultural ones, love, etc. etc. etc., and you have made good points and listed them. But… after all the times it’s brought up Luzurial is an arch angel, and how strong she is despite not being at full strength, it comes across really thick as a kind of male pride thing in Kevin’s behaviour. It’s part of his character for sure, but it’s also a little sad that nothing’s gunna change much in the next 75 years in regards to viewing women as the one’s that always need protecting on all those levels.
There are reasons it could have happened sure, but it’s something that really popped out to me. Especially after promising an arch angel that these kids would be protected.
Guess it all comes down to ROEs, which you’ve only slightly dabbled in. But considering the world ending threat, I kinda figure the thing should have gotten a few rounds up the grill and hood… I’ll try not to mention all the machine guns and such.
And I am looking forward to seeing the conclusion.

Ha, fair enough. They aren’t related, so no worries about bigger pictures there.

Oh, she is changed. Read the story proper, and you’ll see. Bwahahahaha.
But yes, this was supposed to just be a soldier and I wanted it to just be those emotions. The actual arriving at the homestead. Though, hitting that tarmac is nice too.
I probly did. Apologies. 
Well… comments and reviews are nice.
And yes, heh, it does come across a bit like a second review. My original reply still stands.

A fresh batch of reviews I’ve not responded to yet. Here goes:
First up, @Tcr for the Prompt Oneshot “Blackburn”
Glad the sex was hot. A smutty one shot certainly would have fallen apart otherwise.
This was fun for me, and aye I certainly wanted a different feel and tone to it than I did for Blood and Lace. I’m just happy the interactions between Eloise and Lauren was enjoyable, because otherwise no one would have made it to the sex later on. 
I think I tried harder for elegance this time. Cause of setting. Lol.
 
Next we have another for “Blackburn” from @JayDee
Excellent that you liked it! And Annabelle was rather enjoyable to write, with just offering peaks at who she was. And that viper line I loved, so couldn’t help but slither it in there.
Lauren was really the crux and start of the whole story. She was the first figure I imagined, pretty much right after I walked out of the movie “The Favourite”. The story was originally going to be more focused around her, but when I sat down to right, I had it from the Queen’s perspective to make it more interesting to introduce Lauren.
The sex was just fun to right, and I realized I’ve not done much anal fingering, or mouth riding. So I fixed that.
 
The last of the batch for “Blackburn” is from @CloverReef
After watching a bunch (okay, only 2) of historical pieces centred around the intrigues of court, I just had to write something about it. Glad to see my thing for those small gestures is still appreciated. I’ve always enjoyed doing it, and I won’t stop… so that it’s enjoyed is good, lol. 
I’m honestly not sure what I originally intended for pace, but I’m glad it is enjoyable and interesting. 
Lauren… as said to JayDee, she is the crux of the whole thing.
 
Last review is from @InBrightestDay for the tale “Comin’ Home”
Don’t worry, I’m just happy you did leave one at all.
The return home… I think I wrote this around Remembrance Day, and I had to think back to a lot of things I was personally remembering of how I felt on my own return home. It’s one thing to see your loved ones again, but then as you mention, there’s a slight oddness of so many little things being different. It can make the familiar unfamiliar, and the warzone feel comforting again. can anyway.
I know in real life soldiers don’t return home with all that gear, but I felt it would be a touch more impactful if she did. So... I wrote that in. As to the sword and wider world, it’s almost funny that I had forgotten about it when going to write Blood and Lace. But yes, I thought it would be an interesting little nudge.
Well, I’m glad it came out all right. I think I just got hyper focused on certain elements to get across the steamyness I wanted.
 
To all four of you. Thank you kindly for the reviews.

A fresh batch of reviews I’ve not responded to yet. Here goes:
First up, @Tcr for the Prompt Oneshot “Blackburn”
Glad the sex was hot. A smutty one shot certainly would have fallen apart otherwise.
This was fun for me, and aye I certainly wanted a different feel and tone to it than I did for Blood and Lace. I’m just happy the interactions between Eloise and Lauren was enjoyable, because otherwise no one would have made it to the sex later on. 
I think I tried harder for elegance this time. Cause of setting. Lol.
 
Next we have another for “Blackburn” from @JayDee
Excellent that you liked it! And Annabelle was rather enjoyable to write, with just offering peaks at who she was. And that viper line I loved, so couldn’t help but slither it in there.
Lauren was really the crux and start of the whole story. She was the first figure I imagined, pretty much right after I walked out of the movie “The Favourite”. The story was originally going to be more focused around her, but when I sat down to right, I had it from the Queen’s perspective to make it more interesting to introduce Lauren.
The sex was just fun to right, and I realized I’ve not done much anal fingering, or mouth riding. So I fixed that.
 
The last of the batch for “Blackburn” is from @CloverReef
After watching a bunch (okay, only 2) of historical pieces centred around the intrigues of court, I just had to write something about it. Glad to see my thing for those small gestures is still appreciated. I’ve always enjoyed doing it, and I won’t stop… so that it’s enjoyed is good, lol. 
I’m honestly not sure what I originally intended for pace, but I’m glad it is enjoyable and interesting. 
Lauren… as said to JayDee, she is the crux of the whole thing.
 
Last review is from @InBrightestDay for the tale “Comin’ Home”
Don’t worry, I’m just happy you did leave one at all.
The return home… I think I wrote this around Remembrance Day, and I had to think back to a lot of things I was personally remembering of how I felt on my own return home. It’s one thing to see your loved ones again, but then as you mention, there’s a slight oddness of so many little things being different. It can make the familiar unfamiliar, and the warzone feel comforting again. can anyway.
I know in real life soldiers don’t return home with all that gear, but I felt it would be a touch more impactful if she did. So... I wrote that in. As to the sword and wider world, it’s almost funny that I had forgotten about it when going to write Blood and Lace. But yes, I thought it would be an interesting little nudge.
Well, I’m glad it came out all right. I think I just got hyper focused on certain elements to get across the steamyness I wanted.
 
To all four of you. Thank you kindly for the reviews.

A fresh batch of reviews I’ve not responded to yet. Here goes:
First up, @Tcr for the Prompt Oneshot “Blackburn”
Glad the sex was hot. A smutty one shot certainly would have fallen apart otherwise.
This was fun for me, and aye I certainly wanted a different feel and tone to it than I did for Blood and Lace. I’m just happy the interactions between Eloise and Lauren was enjoyable, because otherwise no one would have made it to the sex later on. 
I think I tried harder for elegance this time. Cause of setting. Lol.
 
Next we have another for “Blackburn” from @JayDee
Excellent that you liked it! And Annabelle was rather enjoyable to write, with just offering peaks at who she was. And that viper line I loved, so couldn’t help but slither it in there.
Lauren was really the crux and start of the whole story. She was the first figure I imagined, pretty much right after I walked out of the movie “The Favourite”. The story was originally going to be more focused around her, but when I sat down to right, I had it from the Queen’s perspective to make it more interesting to introduce Lauren.
The sex was just fun to right, and I realized I’ve not done much anal fingering, or mouth riding. So I fixed that.
 
The last of the batch for “Blackburn” is from @CloverReef
After watching a bunch (okay, only 2) of historical pieces centred around the intrigues of court, I just had to write something about it. Glad to see my thing for those small gestures is still appreciated. I’ve always enjoyed doing it, and I won’t stop… so that it’s enjoyed is good, lol. 
I’m honestly not sure what I originally intended for pace, but I’m glad it is enjoyable and interesting. 
Lauren… as said to JayDee, she is the crux of the whole thing.
 
Last review is from @InBrightestDay for the tale “Comin’ Home”
Don’t worry, I’m just happy you did leave one at all.
The return home… I think I wrote this around Remembrance Day, and I had to think back to a lot of things I was personally remembering of how I felt on my own return home. It’s one thing to see your loved ones again, but then as you mention, there’s a slight oddness of so many little things being different. It can make the familiar unfamiliar, and the warzone feel comforting again. can anyway.
I know in real life soldiers don’t return home with all that gear, but I felt it would be a touch more impactful if she did. So... I wrote that in. As to the sword and wider world, it’s almost funny that I had forgotten about it when going to write Blood and Lace. But yes, I thought it would be an interesting little nudge.
Well, I’m glad it came out all right. I think I just got hyper focused on certain elements to get across the steamyness I wanted.
 
To all four of you. Thank you kindly for the reviews.

Woo! I want to read your dark and depraved.

Yaaaas! Exactly what I'm in the mood for.

Glad I could inspire something with that character, I do love dusting her off occasionally, and Corine seems quite cool.
And I do hope you do more with this setting. Ambitions versus typing fingers battle or not. Perhaps something deliciously dark, and depraved. Like a good dark red wine.

Crap… this is your review thread. But story straight:
Comin’ Home was the story that kicked off Blood and Lace. I wrote it first, then decided to expand on what I had.
As to the art… it was commissioned. I asked a friend to do it up, but the pin-ups were commissioned. There is one piece floating around that I’ve not shared here yet that was part of a trade but… yeah. Guess I’ve got the authorial arrogance and neediness. Well, fuck.
Anyway, had to set records straight, so back to your review stuff.

[totally hogging InBrightestDay’s thread] Long time ago I comissioned some art of my old (non smut!) roleplay original character, I’m respectfully disagreeing with it being neediness and arrogance and just saying I thought it was cool. Still do. S’quality artwork! Oh, and I got a $30 quick sketch based on my Mortal Kombat fic although that wasn’t my characters, more of a way to promo it on hentai-foundry when I posted there. and total humblebrag, one dude did some fanart after reading one of my TF2 stories, and another commissioned something based on one of my harry potter stories. but it’’s more humble than brag as neither told me and I only saw later.
Oh, and if you get down there check out SinfulWolf’s Closing Time oneshot, that one was great! [/totally hogging InBrightestDay’s thread] I am probably the last person on the internet using fake html for forum posts.
 

Crap… this is your review thread. But story straight:
Comin’ Home was the story that kicked off Blood and Lace. I wrote it first, then decided to expand on what I had.
As to the art… it was commissioned. I asked a friend to do it up, but the pin-ups were commissioned. There is one piece floating around that I’ve not shared here yet that was part of a trade but… yeah. Guess I’ve got the authorial arrogance and neediness. Well, fuck.
Anyway, had to set records straight, so back to your review stuff.

Heh, I am?

Your rambling there did make sense. But, while it’s good to have a support system, my exact concerns are going to be these two make love, and everything gets fixed (there’s only a few chapters left after all and at least one of them is going to be stopping the threat to the world). As JayDee said, making it F/F wouldn’t have made this particularly better. And I’ve not said you’re going to go that route… it’s just kind of primed for it right now.

Your rambling there did make sense. But, while it’s good to have a support system, my exact concerns are going to be these two make love, and everything gets fixed (there’s only a few chapters left after all and at least one of them is going to be stopping the threat to the world). As JayDee said, making it F/F wouldn’t have made this particularly better. And I’ve not said you’re going to go that route… it’s just kind of primed for it right now.

And honestly, even that might not do it.

So… all it takes for the US to adopt metric is a demonic invasion. Good to know

So… all it takes for the US to adopt metric is a demonic invasion. Good to know

Went a little Cronenberg, there.

Author: Sinfulwolf
Title: Comin’ Home
Summary: A soldier returns home from Hell to her lover.
Feedback: Always welcome
Fandom: Original – Fantasy/Sci-fi
Warnings: F/F, Fingering
Solo story or chaptered story: Solo story. This is actually a rather short one shot that eventually spawned my Blood and Lace setting.
URL: http://original.adult-fanfiction.org/story.php?no=600109262
Review Reply thread: 
 

Funny thing, I actually calculated how strong Luzurial is.  I wanted to have some kind of yardstick so I wasn’t making her too strong, so…
In Whore of Heaven, Luzurial bites through a stone tentacle being used to gag her.  Assuming the magic animating the tentacle didn’t make it any stronger than normal stone (unlikely, but this at least gives us a minimum value), and assuming physical properties similar to granite, then it would have a compressive strength of roughly 200 megapascals or 29,000 psi.  Average human bite force is 162 psi, so assuming all of Luzurial’s strength scales to her bite force, that would make her (at full power) at least 180 times human strength.  Even assuming she’s at like one third of that right now, that’s still 60 times human strength.

I’m not sure if it would have been Neutral Female only because Kevin and Abdul are clearly very out of their depths. However I think this also went to show how strong an Arch Angel can actually be.