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The Wolf's Snare - feedback, review replies, notes and crazy ramblings


JustS

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Writing has been held up by the death of someone very special to me. It's been hard enough to go to work, let alone do more of this. Writing will resume, in time.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Thanks for the condolences guys.

Work on my three ongoing stories is coming along well now. One plot chapter of the Wolf's Snare is currently in the bag, I'm halfway through the last chapter of my Fire Emblem fic and I've just published another part of my super smutty original story here if you're interested: http://original.adult-fanfiction.org/story.php?no=600107717&chapter=3

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  • 2 weeks later...

The next chapter of The Wolf's Snare is here.

I think I mentioned how the next couple of chapters would be story-focused and thus I would wait until they are finished along with a smut-heavy chapter so not to PO the smut-only fans. However, I've decided that this was a dumb strategy given how long I take to finish one chapter of the WS, let alone three, so I'm returning to parceling them out one at a time.

So, please don't take issue that this and the next chapter is lore-heavy, more wolf sex is on the way.

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Lol true dat about the parceling out. I suffer from long bouts of zero productivity interspersed with short stretches of furious smut writing where I can pump out four or five chapter drafts in one day.

In most of my plot heavy chapters what I try to do is drop hints at the potential sexiness that can develop from the plot. Chap36 for instance brings memory loss and mental suggestion in without much sex but I did try to stear the narrative so that audiences can immediately imagine the potential uses for smut.

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Lol true dat about the parceling out. I suffer from long bouts of zero productivity interspersed with short stretches of furious smut writing where I can pump out four or five chapter drafts in one day.

In most of my plot heavy chapters what I try to do is drop hints at the potential sexiness that can develop from the plot. Chap36 for instance brings memory loss and mental suggestion in without much sex but I did try to stear the narrative so that audiences can immediately imagine the potential uses for smut.

Thanks for the feedback. That's interesting you thought Lara's capture and escape felt truncated, since I felt I was maybe going too in-depth with this chapter on the whole!

And yes, the preggo plot will have a different ending. Nothing is 100% nailed down until I've written it but it will defo be different, even if the final chapter will play out similarly.

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Just clarifying, the middle section and interactions between Lara and the men were very fleshed out. It was the lead up or where she got thrown into the hut that felt like it could've benefited from some visceral detail, such as the general delapitation and weathering or dirtiness of the surroundings. You had good description of the griminess of the men and the environment could use that too

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Actually, on rereading the chapter , I feel the build-up is fine as it is. The main issue I had a was the "then Lara ran into the bandits" clause. Because of its placement right after your paragraph with past tense reminiscence, I initially was confused if Lara ran into the bandits before she met the wolves or just now in the timeline of this chapter.

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Actually, on rereading the chapter , I feel the build-up is fine as it is. The main issue I had a was the "then Lara ran into the bandits" clause. Because of its placement right after your paragraph with past tense reminiscence, I initially was confused if Lara ran into the bandits before she met the wolves or just now in the timeline of this chapter.

I did think of putting in some sort of separation to make clear it was a flashback. Do you think it needs it?

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Guest WhatUp

I did think of putting in some sort of separation to make clear it was a flashback. Do you think it needs it?

it'd help. I thought it was clear enough but others might not.
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I did think of putting in some sort of separation to make clear it was a flashback. Do you think it needs it?

I'd err on the side of extra clarity. I've received email reviews from readers in the past where because they skimmed the plot in order to get to the sex they ended up needlessly confused. You have to assume some of your readers may be distracted with all the blood lost to their genitals, haha.

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Guest Wolf Cock

I'd err on the side of extra clarity. I've received email reviews from readers in the past where because they skimmed the plot in order to get to the sex they ended up needlessly confused. You have to assume some of your readers may be distracted with all the blood lost to their genitals, haha.

Yep. This is true.

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Guest What_Up

Suggestion, feel free to ignore. If you do another scene where Lara and Jen get fucked at the same time, Maybe one of them can be lying on their back, and the other on their hands and knees. That way they can kiss (upside down, and have boob access.

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  • 2 weeks later...

I'd err on the side of extra clarity. I've received email reviews from readers in the past where because they skimmed the plot in order to get to the sex they ended up needlessly confused. You have to assume some of your readers may be distracted with all the blood lost to their genitals, haha.

Thanks for that feedback guys. I've put in two line break-type things that I hope make things more clear.

This is a heads-up that the next chapter is coming very soon. As always, I have written much more than planned so this next plot-heavy part will be broken up into two chapters instead of one now.

However, I will be planting a particular seed throughout these plotty bits that will hopefully pay off to your liking in the smut-filled finale (at least in one of the two paths anyway). Stay tuned.

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Suggestion, feel free to ignore. If you do another scene where Lara and Jen get fucked at the same time, Maybe one of them can be lying on their back, and the other on their hands and knees. That way they can kiss (upside down, and have boob access.

Interesting. You also gave me another idea. Thanks for the suggestion. Stay tuned.

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Chapter 14A and 14B are now online.

Please note, I have retconned a prior mention of Lara being 2-months pregnant in the B story line. She is now just a couple of weeks preggo. You'll understand why once all is said and done in this and the following chapter.

And yes, the grand finale of smut is coming. It's actually developing and getting more elaborate over time. Both it and the penultimate chapter are coming alone nicely.

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Nice chapter. But looking back, you didn't retcon the pregnancy being 2 months in alpha (b)

Probably the chapter with the most references to the 2-month thing and I forget to check it.

Thanks for letting me know, I'm editing it now. If any one else spots any other gaffes or continuity issues please let me know! :)

Edited by JustS
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Guest WhatUp

Maybe it's just me, but I was expecting Lara to be less conscience bound, from living with the wolves possibly even somewhat feral. But at the same time, it's good.that you didn't. But that said, HOW COULD YOU HAVE LARA SAY SHE LOVES THE WOLVES.IN FRONT OF JENNIFER AND NOT HAVE HER SAY "I LOVE YOU" TO JENNIFER? Shame on you.

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Maybe it's just me, but I was expecting Lara to be less conscience bound, from living with the wolves possibly even somewhat feral. But at the same time, it's good.that you didn't. But that said, HOW COULD YOU HAVE LARA SAY SHE LOVES THE WOLVES.IN FRONT OF JENNIFER AND NOT HAVE HER SAY "I LOVE YOU" TO JENNIFER? Shame on you.

In my mind she is not that far removed from humanity, what with her having only been on the island a few months and having Jennifer around. Potentially in the future she could go more than way though, I suppose.

You know what, that didn't even occur to me. I don't like 'I love you' scenes usually and it feels like her and Jennifer are kind of beyond saying it. Lara, Jennifer and the wolves have such, shall we say, non-traditional lives that maybe that phrase doesn't really even work as we would use it. Maybe if other readers are bothered by this I might consider changing it at some point.

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So Lara's gonna kill fools, then come.he.strip off an' fuck wolves? Or will she rest first?

Let's just say when the bandits are dealt with we're going immediately back to smutsville. :)

The next chapter is almost done, and work has started on the following, final one. I've got to say it's a relief to be finally capping off this story after a well over a year and a half since the first part. If I have no major life distractions I'm expecting it to all be done and posted before October.

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