I Have Never....

[quamp]

I have, but I have to qualify that in saying it was a parody. (See my story The Bad Adult Anime Fanfic.)

I have never.... driven an SUV.

[StoryJunkie]

Me either, I guess. My van did have electronic 4 wheel drive, but it was, nevertheless, a van.

I have never been very diplomatic.

[Guest Soulsearcher]

diplomatic is my middle name. Sometimes I think I'm too diplomatic.

I have never been so busy I wasn't able to get at least a couple of hours sleep.

[redsliver]

I have, I refer to that as fourth year chemical engineering, actually

I have never made wine, spirits or beer.

[Guest Soulsearcher]

Made? Nope! Me either.

I have never danced naked under the stars.

[Guest Pherazen]

Does dancing naked on my friend's back porch that has glass walls and ceiling with overcast clouds at night count?

I've never thrown my laptop through a window (however much I've wanted to.

[Guest Mike256bit]

While I have harmed my laptop, it wasn't thrown through a window. . .

I have never driven.

[Guest Pherazen]

I have. Illegally. Several times, in fact.

...oh, I'm sorry, you mean a car? I thought you meant people.

I have never stolen something from my workplace.

[Guest Mike256bit]

I'm having the best mental images of driving a person with full costume (driving goggles, gloves. . . ). I assume it's stick-shift?

I've stolen, if you can call it that, a pen or two.

I have never seen the Midwest.

[quamp]

It's really not that exciting.

I have never... given someone else a wedgie.

[Guest Soulsearcher]

^^_v I have. It's one of my few revenges I can actually accomplish with the husband.

I have never caused an accident.

[StoryJunkie]

*sighs* It's been a dream of mine since "Memoirs of a Geisha" But, no, me either.

I've never been to the east coast

[polywolly]

Nope. Me neither.

I have never tripped over a garden hose.

[redsliver]

I've been tripped with a garden hose.

I have never lived somewhere with a pool.

[Guest Soulsearcher]

I have ... although, I never used it because I was too busy working. ^^;;;

I have never been to Texas.

[StoryJunkie]

Me either. My grandmother had earring shaped like Texas though. Although I'm just rambling, aren't I?

I've never "chug-a-lugged" a yard of ale.

[redsliver]

I am uncertain how much is in a yard, but I am certain I have chugged that much ale, beer, lager, and/or rum in a single evening.

Has devised an excessive drinking game.

[polywolly]

Uh...not guilty, or me neither, whichever.

I have never given a friend a haircut.

[Nanaea]

I have, but then again, it was my job.

I have never understood poker.

[redsliver]

I have, I play a five dollar game every week.

I have never cheated to win money.

[Guest Pherazen]

I have, but it was Monopoly. And I was, like. Eleven. I think.

I have never put off for tomorrow what I could have done today.

[quamp]

Hmm... I'll get back to you on this tomorrow....

I have never... attended my high school reunion.

[redsliver]

I haven't been out of high school for 10 years yet.

I have never told a homeless person to get a job.

[polywolly]

I haven't either. In all honesty, I've never met what someone would call a real homeless person.

I have never met a real homeless person.

[StoryJunkie]

I married one. (He was 13 when he was homeless, but he was no longer homeless when I met him.. By all that is holy, he should be dead.) (That CAN be arranged!)

I've never liked swallowing pills