Guest Guest Posted November 12, 2013 Report Share Posted November 12, 2013 i refer to the men guarding the expedition Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MorbidFantasy Posted November 12, 2013 Author Report Share Posted November 12, 2013 (edited) this is your baby, and with one or two issues i have regarding the unalterable chapters, it is amazing; that said, you need to recall what it is the characters want to achieve: yes Xavier wants her, but more than her he wants to be seen as a man who gets what he wants HIMSELF -THAT IS LATIN- THAT IS MACHISMO. NOT ONE of his men can think otherwise. a hunter traps a wild animal that maimed/ hunts a shark that bit off his arm; he doesn't buy it from a guy who 'broke' it... and if he does? he never lets the rank and file know it i refer to the men guarding the expedition I'm actually open to suggestions about how to improve the already posted chapters. Nothing plot-altering but subtle details that you had issues with. That is the sort of feedback that really helps me figure out how to approach future content, so fire away with criticism about stuff that I haven't addressed. As for Xavier's proving his machismo, you couldn't be more right. Here are some more thoughts on that. Using North Korea as an example. They deliberately let a large proportion of their population starve, and do next to nothing about it. This is because of the inefficiency of the regime that meant there was a food shortage, so the ruling party made a decision to hoard the resources. Also, North Korea knew that the UN could not just let the NK civvies starve, so the U.S and the red cross etc are bound to send aid. The U.S wanted the NK civvies to know that the sacks of rice being air dropped over them were from the U.S and not NK gov, so they printed something like "A gift from your American Friends" on each sack. The NK gov instead twists this meaning and tells the NK civvies that "our dear leader is so great that even America gives us this rice as tribute to us." effectively taking credit for the rice using a simple rhetorical shift. What I'm going at is even if it is known that Lara was handed over to Xavier, he could easily spin it as "I'm so powerful that even European crime lords seek to appease me. Look, I told them I wanted the famous and powerful Lara Croft, and they immediately caught her and shipped her over to me, buck naked and tied up like a gift offering." That establishes his dominance not just as a man but also as a political powerhouse, if only to deceive his own people into believing so. After that, taking Lara on 1v1 would be of less importance, and he would do it mainly for the entertainment value or just to satisfy any residual grudge. Edit: But regardless of whether Xavier decides to spin his story like that, he will definitely want to prove his machismo in person. Edited November 12, 2013 by MorbidFantasy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted November 12, 2013 Report Share Posted November 12, 2013 lara has to verbaly 'earn' the prison gang rape from Everst: the 'elderly' man's way of pressing a button and she is put to heel...otherwise it's overkill. This way it becomes a more valid, character consistant plot device, and not just sex. EVERESTS TEN INCH SPIKED DILDO Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted November 12, 2013 Report Share Posted November 12, 2013 think about it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted November 12, 2013 Report Share Posted November 12, 2013 does x know about the device? he'll want it removed... and the spray - he'll want to make her cum - without help... true machismo/ domination Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted November 12, 2013 Report Share Posted November 12, 2013 truth is most 'men' would be insulted by the device being in her when they 'dominate' her... whether they paid for her or not - masculine domination is unaided - its an ego thing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted November 12, 2013 Report Share Posted November 12, 2013 that last note goes double if the man is short/X... or an old man/ man of honor T with a much younger woman. here everests training in giving the woman pleasure comes in Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted November 12, 2013 Report Share Posted November 12, 2013 hmmm? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MorbidFantasy Posted November 12, 2013 Author Report Share Posted November 12, 2013 Lara has two options. 1. Have the O-device shock her into orgasm, which is more painful and much less enjoyable, and completely takes away her control of her own body. 2. Make herself cum as she was trained to do. Much more enjoyable, and at least she's in control, but that means she's actively trying to enjoy being violated. lose lose for Lara, win win for the men. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted November 12, 2013 Report Share Posted November 12, 2013 that was what i was suggesting... they have to 'think' they did it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted November 12, 2013 Report Share Posted November 12, 2013 you miss one thing in the loose loose argument - albeite a small one - think of what i said about 'true masculine domination' YES she will be forcing herself... to use them to get HERSELF off - not them doing it to her- she steals their victory/ their proof of virility Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted November 13, 2013 Report Share Posted November 13, 2013 pride is the thing... SHE did it - not them - SHE CONTROLS EVERYTHING - who cums, and when. She can use them up fast... yes she is being forced, but she is the dominant one - control is hers. SHE IS THE 'MAN' as a person in a situation she doesn't want to be in - she runs the prison shes sentenced to. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted November 13, 2013 Report Share Posted November 13, 2013 how will X explain letting her go free to his men after he rapes her? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MorbidFantasy Posted November 13, 2013 Author Report Share Posted November 13, 2013 You're over thinking it. The bottom line is Lara doesn't want to enjoy the sex, but she has to orgasm no matter what. The men will not know the difference (if they don't use the O-device) and believe her to be a slut or them to be good in the sack (consensual conquest). Or they will entertain their rape fantasies in which they want to know that she is being forced to cum (non-consensual conquest). Then there are the occasional freak that will forbid Lara from cumming when under heavy aphrodisiac doses. The O-device can't really be used here since its effects cannot be resisted. Then Lara might be in bondage with a funnel under her snatch a cup under the funnel(her pisser is plugged). the cup is on a scale that increases the voltage on Lara's wired piercings as the cup gets heavier, so basically as she fills the cup with more of her juices she gets shocked even more. If Lara is forbidden from cumming, it is to toy with her If Lara is forced to cum, it is also to toy with her. It's pretty flexible. Generally I don't think most men will realistically expect Lara to want this. So either they're already in their own fantasy world and will delude themselves regarding Lara, or they'll be brutally aware that they're raping her and enjoy that sort of power. Just the act of sticking it to her is power enough for most people. I don't think these guys are that nuanced to be philosophically dissecting their relationship with Lara. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted November 13, 2013 Report Share Posted November 13, 2013 if she thinks of it as what she has to go through to reach her goal how can they mess with her? if she is participating out of personal desire - swim through shit to reach saftey - how can they call it a win? it isnt their victory. she could nt care less about their games... its all just x rated means to an end Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted November 13, 2013 Report Share Posted November 13, 2013 that... and theyre going to die for it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted November 13, 2013 Report Share Posted November 13, 2013 you want to write her as strong - unbreakable - this is how Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted November 13, 2013 Report Share Posted November 13, 2013 they are AWARE there is an agreement... SHE AGREED TO HAVE SEX WITH THEM - THERE IS NO RAPE! - NO POWERFUL MANLY VICTORY. All it is... is a consensual business deal. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted November 13, 2013 Report Share Posted November 13, 2013 albeit a humiliating one Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted November 13, 2013 Report Share Posted November 13, 2013 there is nothing she will consider unwanted... she has to do it - AGREED TO IT. takes the very notion of non-consensual away - by definition - therefore no rape. like scrubbing dried shit from an old guys ass... an unpleasant job requirement Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted November 13, 2013 Report Share Posted November 13, 2013 infact, its the men who should feel humiliated - THEYRE PAYING FOR IT. NOT besting her. "HA HA I WON.... so we're cool now -right?" Some victory. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MorbidFantasy Posted November 13, 2013 Author Report Share Posted November 13, 2013 oookay, things are getting out of hand here. Someone's been having too much of the caff-caff hmmmm? Try to keep it to suggestions to what you would like to see change and/or happen in the fic and not do too much tangential analysis of FMC. It's only a ero fanfic afterall. It's here to entertain not be your Adult bookclub discussion of the week lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted November 13, 2013 Report Share Posted November 13, 2013 true. still... youre the one who started this "discussion thread" no? And you defend your points with valid arguments. so why pussy out now? have no valid answers? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted November 13, 2013 Report Share Posted November 13, 2013 wow... ignoring the slight? or writing a three page response? hmmmmmm?lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted November 13, 2013 Report Share Posted November 13, 2013 So, when did insulting a fan of your work become par for your course? about the same time as becoming a coward? hmmmm? l o l Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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