Bitch please meter is full

[botticelliangel]

So here I was, content, sleepy, about the hit the hay, and I decided "oh why not I'll just check to see if I have any new reviews, 9 times out of 10 thats a no. But heck yeah, I'm going to dream."

And what do you know... I got a review: One that just blew my "bitch please" meter into overdrive.

The fastest, easiest way to piss me the capital F off is to tell me that I am not working fast enough for your liking. It's not even a flame! At least those I laugh at.

"Omjeeeez its taken nearly 3 months to get this far? Get to the action already... I'm starting to forget what this is about the story is moving at a snail's pace. You better hurry if you want to keep your readers active!" - le reviewer

Ok punk, you really want to know why I don't update this story all that often?

I have a life outside of my writing. Sometimes... most of the time... I wish I didn't.

I have spent the last three months being jerked around from full time to part time hours, getting a promotion (which I still haven't received proper compensation for yet). Then being used as a fucking pawn to get someone else fired, and working harder then most of my coworkers (sans pregnant ones) are expected to because if I don't work hard I'll get written up, but if they get written up they'll call ethics on my boss so he doesn't even bother trying to write them up.

Oh and not to mention half of my co workers are pregnant, which sucks oh so bad because I am the mommy of two angel babies. My daughters both died, because I am unable to carry a child full term. So every goddamn day when I go into work and people ask me "hey why aren't you pregnant yet?" or make jokes about something being in the water I want to cry... not just cry, but fall into a deep dark pit of darkness and never crawl out again.

And it gets better: Since June I've had my cousin, who is 17 living with me. He has issues with girls because his mother abused him, and he takes the 'yolo' phrase to an extreme. Found out that he is creepy as heck. He sits at the base of my bedroom door and listens in when my husband and I are home. I caught him trying to watch us have sex!

I freaked out and confided in one of my friends about this situation. I thought she'd understand because she has some weird roommates too, but no... all she said was "well it's a good thing you lost your babies, because you are clearly not ready to be a mother". (omfg wtf!)

And my drunkard of an uncle (cousin's father) sits around and blames me that his son doesn't do anything. "Why don't you make him get a job?" the jerk-wad whines!

News flash! You live in the same fucking house! I pay you rent to live here. I could just stop paying your boozed up ass so that I don't go broke and insane from having a 17 year old who eats all of my food, and breaks everything... and I mean EVERYTHING in my house. He's your son, you be the parent!

Omg, you really expect me to be in the mood to write a fucking pwp fic with shit like this going on in my life?

Saying that writing is my best slagging friend! I write like a madwoman every damn day. I divide my before work and after work time into writing for nanowrimo, and writing originals or fanfics... and yes I am ahead of the target goal for nano even though I've written on other things! If I haven't updated a fic don't be so fucking dumb as to tell me that I'm crawling at a snails pace. I don't fucking write on command asshole, especially not for someone who is going to be rude.

I'll even tell you a secret: I was just about to write more on that fic, but the second I read your glib little comment I got a little defiant. Now the mood is gone and I have to rant because its 2am, my language is diving down to somewhere between "trailer trash" and "sailor", and.... and...

*fizzles out*

[Cuzosu]

So here I was, content, sleepy, about the hit the hay, and I decided "oh why not I'll just check to see if I have any new reviews, 9 times out of 10 thats a no. But heck yeah, I'm going to dream."

And what do you know... I got a review: One that just blew my "bitch please" meter into overdrive.

The fastest, easiest way to piss me the capital F off is to tell me that I am not working fast enough for your liking. It's not even a flame! At least those I laugh at.

"Omjeeeez its taken nearly 3 months to get this far? Get to the action already... I'm starting to forget what this is about the story is moving at a snail's pace. You better hurry if you want to keep your readers active!" - le reviewer

Ok punk, you really want to know why I don't update this story all that often?

I have a life outside of my writing. Sometimes... most of the time... I wish I didn't.

I have spent the last three months being jerked around from full time to part time hours, getting a promotion (which I still haven't received proper compensation for yet). Then being used as a fucking pawn to get someone else fired, and working harder then most of my coworkers (sans pregnant ones) are expected to because if I don't work hard I'll get written up, but if they get written up they'll call ethics on my boss so he doesn't even bother trying to write them up.

Oh and not to mention half of my co workers are pregnant, which sucks oh so bad because I am the mommy of two angel babies. My daughters both died, because I am unable to carry a child full term. So every goddamn day when I go into work and people ask me "hey why aren't you pregnant yet?" or make jokes about something being in the water I want to cry... not just cry, but fall into a deep dark pit of darkness and never crawl out again.

And it gets better: Since June I've had my cousin, who is 17 living with me. He has issues with girls because his mother abused him, and he takes the 'yolo' phrase to an extreme. Found out that he is creepy as heck. He sits at the base of my bedroom door and listens in when my husband and I are home. I caught him trying to watch us have sex!

I freaked out and confided in one of my friends about this situation. I thought she'd understand because she has some weird roommates too, but no... all she said was "well it's a good thing you lost your babies, because you are clearly not ready to be a mother". (omfg wtf!)

And my drunkard of an uncle (cousin's father) sits around and blames me that his son doesn't do anything. "Why don't you make him get a job?" the jerk-wad whines!

News flash! You live in the same fucking house! I pay you rent to live here. I could just stop paying your boozed up ass so that I don't go broke and insane from having a 17 year old who eats all of my food, and breaks everything... and I mean EVERYTHING in my house. He's your son, you be the parent!

Omg, you really expect me to be in the mood to write a fucking pwp fic with shit like this going on in my life?

Saying that writing is my best slagging friend! I write like a madwoman every damn day. I divide my before work and after work time into writing for nanowrimo, and writing originals or fanfics... and yes I am ahead of the target goal for nano even though I've written on other things! If I haven't updated a fic don't be so fucking dumb as to tell me that I'm crawling at a snails pace. I don't fucking write on command asshole, especially not for someone who is going to be rude.

I'll even tell you a secret: I was just about to write more on that fic, but the second I read your glib little comment I got a little defiant. Now the mood is gone and I have to rant because its 2am, my language is diving down to somewhere between "trailer trash" and "sailor", and.... and...

*fizzles out*

...In the first place, the reviewer was a moron. Being that rude to an author is dumb, regardless of whether or not the person is published, and I admit I'd probably have the same resentful "Yeah, f#%! you too!" reaction you did. Unfortunately people are stupid. (As a general rule; I personally meet a lot of neat people online, probably because of the sites I frequent, but in person I usually detest most of the people I meet.)

That's a sucky work situation. I'd be miserable, too.

Geez, I don't know that I'd even call that person a friend.... That's a horrible thing to say. Not to mention, if he's not your kid, why should you have to be the mother-figure? Her presuming that is bull, and frankly I think you have every right to be concerned about the teen's behavior. He probably needs to see a counselor - a good one. Those, unfortunately, are rare, and usually expensive. But it really does sound like he needs to see an abuse counselor. And probably you need to set firm rules - although since he's not your kid, I don't know how you're going to enforce them. Not unless your uncle is willing to hold to them as well.

As to your uncle complaining that you haven't made him get a job - my only solution to that is...you could tell your uncle that unless he wants you to be the one making all the decisions about his son until he turns 18, it's his problem. (*wince* Sorry if that's not helpful. I'm not the best at compromise; too much of a hard-liner, and often brutally honest.)

And again, the reviewer...I'd have responded pretty much the same way. I don't tolerate unnecessary crap well. Especially from people who should know better. So I hope this rant got it off your chest, helped your temper calm enough for you to focus on writing - even if it was some other story. (Hey, it's what I would've done! )

[botticelliangel]

And again, the reviewer...I'd have responded pretty much the same way. I don't tolerate unnecessary crap well. Especially from people who should know better. So I hope this rant got it off your chest, helped your temper calm enough for you to focus on writing - even if it was some other story. (Hey, it's what I would've done!

I just crashed and slept like a baby after I got done ranting! Now that I actually slept I feel a little silly that I let the review get to me so bad. I've seen, and dealt with so much worse before. So I'm just going to blame it on being way overtired . As for my cousin: I'm kicking him out. There isn't a darn thing I can do for him, and I know it. His father legally can't dump him until he turns 18, so until then he's going to have to sleep on his dad's couch. I feel bad about it, but I have to do what's right for me, and I have given him every opportunity and chance I could to help him. He's going to be 18 next month so he's going to have to grow up sometime...

[DemonGoddess]

Even though I don't write, I HATE seeing reviews like that. As you stated, and as MOST of us are aware, you do have a life outside of writing. For free, I might add. Not only that, I'd rather read something with some kind of plot and plot development. This is when I think "sorry kiddo, but the writer does have to GET you there first" and that's one of the NICER things that goes through my head when seeing that.

As to your job situation, that's just awful. I've been in jobs where I hated my job, hated going to work, and in fact, got so stressed from it, my ulcer acted up in a big way. It was lovely getting sick on the train every morning before work.

As to the lack of children, I've observed over time that people can be insensitive about it. Many suffer from "open mouth insert foot" syndrome regarding this as well. As you've said, there are medical reasons for this having happened for you. The point is, whether or not a person knows why you don't have any children, doesn't mean that a person should badger you about HAVING children. Gal I've been friends with since I was 10, has never had any. She's never had a desire to be a mother. She got a load of crap from many people over the years about it, but it works for her. Thing to remember here is that it's no one else's business, and they keep sticking noses and comments in where not wanted, you're well within your rights to tell 'em to shut the fuck up and leave it alone.

As to your cousin? He needs some serious help.

[Cuzosu]

I just crashed and slept like a baby after I got done ranting! Now that I actually slept I feel a little silly that I let the review get to me so bad. I've seen, and dealt with so much worse before. So I'm just going to blame it on being way overtired . As for my cousin: I'm kicking him out. There isn't a darn thing I can do for him, and I know it. His father legally can't dump him until he turns 18, so until then he's going to have to sleep on his dad's couch. I feel bad about it, but I have to do what's right for me, and I have given him every opportunity and chance I could to help him. He's going to be 18 next month so he's going to have to grow up sometime...

Sleep helps, too. I've got to pack before I can sleep, though. Then a 4-5 hour drive, and a bit of a visit. And then another approximately five hour drive, and then sleep, and then a day visiting my bf's mom and uncle before we come on another long drive back home. Oh joy.... I should've slept when I had the chance. Caffeine is going to be a very close friend tomorrow. Wait, no, sorry - today. Craaaap....

And, meh, we all have bad days - and it sounded like you were being hassled at work about not being pregnant or having kids, on top of living with your uncle and cousin, which means you were stressed anyway. Whereas I'm just that nasty when people are rude to me. It must be a family trait; all the rest of them have it, too. My aunt can't have kids either, so I can understand the stress of that issue. They've been trying to adopt for years; finally went through this year! The whole family's been thrilled for them; she sends pictures all the time. Adorable little girl. What I will say about the adoption process (for unborn babies, if that's what you want), though, is this: if you're not registered, try to get it done as soon as possible. My aunt and uncle were on the list for a long time where they live (Alaska), and they only finally adopted this year, and I'm in my twenties. I've known she couldn't have kids for as long as I can remember, and they wanted kids. (Was rather fun for all of their nieces and nephews, though; we got spoiled and treated like we were their kids, too.) The wait times probably differ for different areas, so you may want to check and see, too, but I just wanted to mention that, since it's information my aunt could have used.

My step dad thinks he can't legally kick my twin brothers out until they turn 21. Not so in the US. Legally speaking, it's possible to kick a kid out even before they turn 18, as long as they've been emancipated. The twins are 19, will be 20 in a few months, and I seriously wonder if he's trying to save them from falling flat on their faces. Because I know they're going to, both of them, at least once. They don't know how to look after themselves - like my bf's sisters when they moved out, they can pretty much cook microwave food and that's it. They don't know how to cook much else without having to carefully follow directions. My mom does pretty much all the laundry, though the older twin washes his work clothes now, but the younger twin has no job and probably doesn't remember how to work a washer, or how to make sure his clothes don't wrinkle in the dryer. He starts a load maybe once every three years, if that. They don't keep up on dishes, they're disrespectful...they don't have the problems you've described your cousin as having, but certainly they'll have a hell of a time making it on their own. (Somewhat similar to your cousin, from what it sounded like to me. My younger twin brother is a layabout and a mooch. Not a good combination.)

[botticelliangel]

Ah well good luck with staying awake! And congrats to your aunt. Adoption is a great option, glad she was able to finally adopt I know a lot of people who had to wait for a long time to adopt, but I fully support it. My husband and his siblings were all adopted.

[Raymy]

Whaaaaahaha! I'm such an idiot! I had this big, long reply and lost it when I left the page to look at something without copying first. I even know better! This edit box says it auto saves at the bottom, but I don't know how to retrieve it. So, since I reread my reply a few times (I'd make a good beta cause I review my own writing obsessively), I might be able to piece it back together. First, I'ma gettin' a big glass of Dr. Pepper ... *shuffles out to the kitchen*, *makes a pouring sound*, *skips back to the computer*, *writes the previous passage*, *copies said passage*, *continues with post ... note: tone change*

I don't want to even mention your crappy work situation, adding insult to injury in that baby-makin' factory.

It must be awful to lose 2 unborn babies. I like the term "angel babies", never heard it before. I chose to "lose" a baby when I was 17 and have thought about *him* ever since. I have an 11 yr old now, but I still wonder "what if"? I think it's much worse if you don't have a choice in the matter. I'm afraid I don't relate to your situation, though, as I got preggers by a sneeze with both, even though I only carried one full term. But if you want to be a mom, I wish you all the luck I can gather. I would survive all right if I wasn't a mom, actually didn't want to be one for about 15 years, but I'm glad I am, now that I can see it from this side. BTW, one of my sisters adopted 2 before becoming pregnant and having a C-section. Strange influences. Motherly hormones. Who knows? *copy*

I'm glad you made a decision on your cousin's ass. Some people just need a swift kick to get goin', some more than others. It doesn't mean their life will improve, but really, not your problem. My other sister, for instance, is 50 yrs old, living in a trailer park on government assistance and whines and complains about her wretched existence. I, on the other hand, am 4 years younger, raised in the same family, and am working full time, paying a mortgage, raising an ADHD boy by myself having no contact or help from his father. Still, I manage to cope. Why? Beats me! My point here is that I can't make her have a better life and she's my frickin' sister. I won't be held responsible, and frankly, never felt that way. *copy*

As for mothering a 17 yr old with a bag full of baggy baggage, who would want that? Especially not your kid! My mom never liked any kids but her own, couldn't be bothered to coo over someone else's brat. It's easy to feel motherly toward a good kid, but you better have carried the tit-biter for 9 months, and dragged the little tantrum drummer boy through his development, to feel motherly toward a difficult boy. Thats where I'm comin' from. *copy*

As for Stoopid Reviewers: again, I can't relate. I've only had 3 reviewers. The first two were short and sweet. Nothing wrong with that. The second, I could wax poetic about. She leaves long, animated reviews for every chapter, and is my inspiration to keep writing. We actually review each other and it's the best experience I could have had on my first story! I'd lend her to you but I wants to keep my precious. I'm a pretty prolific reviewer, myself, and have been known to whine about lack of updates. But I think I had a leg to stand on. 1 year, 2 years, 4 years! C'mon, somebody had to say something! Although, I make sure to heap mucho compliments on the author in hopes of inspiring an update. *copy*

Now that I've read your experience, I have more compassion for the authors in question and will think twice before getting impatient next time. I was strictly on the reviewers side of the update battlefield, because I'm a selfish reader and always want more of a good thing. Thanks for giving me a soft kick, I think it will work. *copy*

[Raymy]

botticelliangel,

Just remembered one more thing I had written before losing it all. (the typing, not my mind)

I'm glad you were able to recover from the 'ranting fever' after a good night's rest. I, too , have suffered many emotional tizzies (especially at night), only to feel much more somber, and foolish, the next day. It has improved with maturity (euphemism for aging) and also being a mom, helped. Less focus on oneself. However, it never disappears totally, I think, because I recently had another. Crying and self-pitying cause I'm starting the menopause journey and there hasn't been enough 'pause' in my 'meno', just the opposite. *copy that*

[botticelliangel]

Raymy, I am lucky to have reviewers, and I am grateful that people take the time to click on the review button and leave me something. But I want to point out that telling an author "hey, I am really looking forward to your next update" or "omg I can't wait for your next update" is completely different than someone taking a threatening tone and saying "you better hurry up if you want to keep your readers." Believe me I read stories all the time where I get to the end of a chapter and say "MORE, MORE" like a deranged fiction gobbling zombie. *that's just me when I read* .... as for calling my girls angel babies, I heard that through a support group I joined because I was really struggling with it. I like calling them angel babies, brings me some comfort. And as for not being able to relate to my fertility issues, I am glad that you can't. I wish that I could make it so that no one ever had to go through what I did.

[Cuzosu]

Ah well good luck with staying awake! And congrats to your aunt. Adoption is a great option, glad she was able to finally adopt I know a lot of people who had to wait for a long time to adopt, but I fully support it. My husband and his siblings were all adopted.

Thanks! I needed the luck! I managed, barely, by catching minor naps on the drive. Though I don't sleep when my bf's grandpa drives; he gets road rage rather frequently, and I don't like sudden changes of direction when I'm sleeping. As to my aunt, well, she's so happy, doing very well. The whole family has been all for my aunt and uncle adopting, anyway, and then it finally went through and they hadn't told us until the day of that there was a possible adoption (they didn't want to hear people pitying them or saying sorry if it didn't go through), so we were quite surprised to get a picture message the morning of! And way early, our time. But it sure woke me up.

Whaaaaahaha! I'm such an idiot! I had this big, long reply and lost it when I left the page to look at something without copying first. I even know better! This edit box says it auto saves at the bottom, but I don't know how to retrieve it. So, since I reread my reply a few times (I'd make a good beta cause I review my own writing obsessively), I might be able to piece it back together. First, I'ma gettin' a big glass of Dr. Pepper ... *shuffles out to the kitchen*, *makes a pouring sound*, *skips back to the computer*, *writes the previous passage*, *copies said passage*, *continues with post ... note: tone change*

I don't want to even mention your crappy work situation, adding insult to injury in that baby-makin' factory.

It must be awful to lose 2 unborn babies. I like the term "angel babies", never heard it before. I chose to "lose" a baby when I was 17 and have thought about *him* ever since. I have an 11 yr old now, but I still wonder "what if"? I think it's much worse if you don't have a choice in the matter. I'm afraid I don't relate to your situation, though, as I got preggers by a sneeze with both, even though I only carried one full term. But if you want to be a mom, I wish you all the luck I can gather. I would survive all right if I wasn't a mom, actually didn't want to be one for about 15 years, but I'm glad I am, now that I can see it from this side. BTW, one of my sisters adopted 2 before becoming pregnant and having a C-section. Strange influences. Motherly hormones. Who knows? *copy*

I'm glad you made a decision on your cousin's ass. Some people just need a swift kick to get goin', some more than others. It doesn't mean their life will improve, but really, not your problem. My other sister, for instance, is 50 yrs old, living in a trailer park on government assistance and whines and complains about her wretched existence. I, on the other hand, am 4 years younger, raised in the same family, and am working full time, paying a mortgage, raising an ADHD boy by myself having no contact or help from his father. Still, I manage to cope. Why? Beats me! My point here is that I can't make her have a better life and she's my frickin' sister. I won't be held responsible, and frankly, never felt that way. *copy*

As for mothering a 17 yr old with a bag full of baggy baggage, who would want that? Especially not your kid! My mom never liked any kids but her own, couldn't be bothered to coo over someone else's brat. It's easy to feel motherly toward a good kid, but you better have carried the tit-biter for 9 months, and dragged the little tantrum drummer boy through his development, to feel motherly toward a difficult boy. Thats where I'm comin' from. *copy*

As for Stoopid Reviewers: again, I can't relate. I've only had 3 reviewers. The first two were short and sweet. Nothing wrong with that. The second, I could wax poetic about. She leaves long, animated reviews for every chapter, and is my inspiration to keep writing. We actually review each other and it's the best experience I could have had on my first story! I'd lend her to you but I wants to keep my precious. I'm a pretty prolific reviewer, myself, and have been known to whine about lack of updates. But I think I had a leg to stand on. 1 year, 2 years, 4 years! C'mon, somebody had to say something! Although, I make sure to heap mucho compliments on the author in hopes of inspiring an update. *copy*

Now that I've read your experience, I have more compassion for the authors in question and will think twice before getting impatient next time. I was strictly on the reviewers side of the update battlefield, because I'm a selfish reader and always want more of a good thing. Thanks for giving me a soft kick, I think it will work. *copy*

I've done that before. It's annoying to lose messages like that.

I like to leave comprehensive reviews on what I feel the writer did a really good job on and what could use improvement, constructive criticism, and - if I was really into the story - sometimes I'll rave about whatever had me spazzing out enthusiastically. I'd read and review for you, Raymy, but I just...I have a hard time even making myself read Renji and Byakuya - so it's nothing against you! In my opinion, Renji and Byakuya is nearly as over-done as Grimmjow and Ichigo, and I have to be in a really easy-going, open-minded mood to even click into one of those pairings. (Unless it's something I've already read and know I enjoyed, of course, in which case I like to revisit stories periodically if they're really well done.) Unfortunately, I haven't been in one of those moods for several months now, so I've been avoiding the pairings I feel are done too often. Or are too obvious - I've been put off most new Kyoraku/Ukitake stories lately, too, and that's one that's mostly left alone. Makes me sad. Although *back on topic* I will also note that botticelliangel made a very good point when she said that there's a big difference between "I'm really looking forward to your next update!" and "You better hurry up if you want to keep your readers." I have friends and readers who pester me periodically, saying things like, "Do you have any more done yet?" "Should I threaten your muse into obedience again?" and "D@#! it, I want more!!" and that works just fine for me. (Sometimes my muses need threatened or bribed into cooperating.) But threatening the author by essentially saying you're going to leave? Okay, bye. Hope you trip on your way out the door. *smiles sweetly, waves, pushes door into rude person* ...yeah, that's about what I want to do.

Honestly, I have a few fics that I follow that take, on average, a year, year and a half between updates. But these are long, in depth chapters with excellent details and personalities that stir emotions, plus, I figure life gets in the way sometimes. So I tend to just say, "Just wondering what's up with (such and such story), since it's been a while since the last update. Hope it's coming along; I'm still looking forward to the next chapter. If I'm bothering you, I'm sorry, that's not my intention. (New paragraph.) Anyway, how's life? Anything new or bothering you?" Usually gets pretty good responses.

botticelliangel,

Just remembered one more thing I had written before losing it all. (the typing, not my mind)

I'm glad you were able to recover from the 'ranting fever' after a good night's rest. I, too , have suffered many emotional tizzies (especially at night), only to feel much more somber, and foolish, the next day. It has improved with maturity (euphemism for aging) and also being a mom, helped. Less focus on oneself. However, it never disappears totally, I think, because I recently had another. Crying and self-pitying cause I'm starting the menopause journey and there hasn't been enough 'pause' in my 'meno', just the opposite. *copy that*

Ehh...my mom's menopause was bad.... It's seriously a wonder my brothers survived it. (Brats. Teenage brats. And the youngest brother, who's 9 years younger than the twins.) She bled about once every two weeks; really screwed my PMS up. My body synchronized with hers. Horrible.

And no, I think we don't ever fully outgrow the emotional tizzies. We just learn how to minimize them and how to use understanding to avoid having them at least sometimes.

Raymy, I am lucky to have reviewers, and I am grateful that people take the time to click on the review button and leave me something. But I want to point out that telling an author "hey, I am really looking forward to your next update" or "omg I can't wait for your next update" is completely different than someone taking a threatening tone and saying "you better hurry up if you want to keep your readers." Believe me I read stories all the time where I get to the end of a chapter and say "MORE, MORE" like a deranged fiction gobbling zombie. *that's just me when I read* .... as for calling my girls angel babies, I heard that through a support group I joined because I was really struggling with it. I like calling them angel babies, brings me some comfort. And as for not being able to relate to my fertility issues, I am glad that you can't. I wish that I could make it so that no one ever had to go through what I did.

*laughs* I often find myself at the end of a chapter, trying to click the next chapter link and not finding it, and then grumbling to myself, "D@#!, that's the end until it gets updated!" At which point I try to leave a nice review, full of praise and maybe pointers...and a puppyish "Please, more! Soon! Please!"

Mm, my aunt's infertility was caused by really bad cramps when she was younger, and one of my step sisters seemed to be having the same symptoms my aunt had described, so I mentioned something about it to my dad (as in, she should go see a doctor before she winds up infertile), and if they didn't get that taken care of, well, not to be inconsiderate but it's not my problem. I said what needed to be said to someone who cared, someone who was in a parental position, and considering the step sister was bad-mouthing me behind my back in school to our class/yearmates, I consider whatever consequences there may be as her own problem. It's not that I think that she deserves to be infertile - hell, I made sure she at least had a chance of remaining fertile! - but...the whole reason she trash talked me behind my back is because I don't get along with her mother. *rolls eyes* And I don't think I should have to play nice with a woman 36 years older than I am who acts less mature than I do. To me. About me. Because she's jealous and/or just plain doesn't like me. Sorry, step sis, the time I tried to play nice is over; if she pushes me now, she's fair game. (Actually I've seen her since I first made this decision, but I'd told my grandma AND my dad what I'd decided, and the hag managed to hold her tongue and just stay quiet. I think she's scared to find out just how far I'd take retribution.)

[botticelliangel]

@Cuzosu

*laughs* I often find myself at the end of a chapter, trying to click the next chapter link and not finding it, and then grumbling to myself, "D@#!, that's the end until it gets updated!" At which point I try to leave a nice review, full of praise and maybe pointers...and a puppyish "Please, more! Soon! Please!"

haha omg. yeah I think we all do that. The funny thing is when I am writing I like the idea of making my readers have that reaction , and then when I'm a reader I forget about that.

@Cuzosu

. I said what needed to be said to someone who cared, someone who was in a parental position, and considering the step sister was bad-mouthing me behind my back in school to our class/yearmates, I consider whatever consequences there may be as her own problem. It's not that I think that she deserves to be infertile

and that sucks about your step sister, but you are right it's not your problem, and there's nothing 'insensitive' about creating a boundary with someone who you can't trust

[Raymy]

Raymy, I am lucky to have reviewers, and I am grateful that people take the time to click on the review button and leave me something. But I want to point out that telling an author "hey, I am really looking forward to your next update" or "omg I can't wait for your next update" is completely different than someone taking a threatening tone and saying "you better hurry up if you want to keep your readers." Believe me I read stories all the time where I get to the end of a chapter and say "MORE, MORE" like a deranged fiction gobbling zombie. *that's just me when I read*

I definitely agree. The people who review are very special because no matter how much the readers love your story, if they say nothing, you just never know if it's being enjoyed. They have a certain amount of power in that they can inspire you to write more, help with con crit, or simply just make you smile. I love the interaction between writer and reader. But if they take it too far, cross the line, and think that you would be nothing without them, well, I just hope the writer has a backbone of steel. I'm pretty sure Cuzosu wouldn't cave, , but I bet there are authors who would be devastated. You found that it made a big impact on your evening, even though you ultimately didn't let it get you down.

But threatening the author by essentially saying you're going to leave? Okay, bye. Hope you trip on your way out the door. *smiles sweetly, waves, pushes door into rude person* ...yeah, that's about what I want to do.

Need I say more?

I read someone's review in a story I was following and they said they were going to stop reading after something happened they didn't like. They had been with it through 40 plus chapters! I commented on their review, because I didn't think the author needed that kind of criticism. It wasn't constructive, just "I don't like the turn your story has taken so I'm outta here." I think they could've left without announcing it, but they clearly wanted to censure the author for being so rude as to ruin the story.

I'd read and review for you, Raymy, but I just...I have a hard time even making myself read Renji and Byakuya - so it's nothing against you! In my opinion, Renji and Byakuya is nearly as over-done as Grimmjow and Ichigo, and I have to be in a really easy-going, open-minded mood to even click into one of those pairings. (Unless it's something I've already read and know I enjoyed, of course, in which case I like to revisit stories periodically if they're really well done.) Unfortunately, I haven't been in one of those moods for several months now, so I've been avoiding the pairings I feel are done too often. Or are too obvious - I've been put off most new Kyoraku/Ukitake stories lately, too, and that's one that's mostly left alone. Makes me sad.

Yeah, I have to admit, that I was a little down that you never reviewed me. But, there's been lots of authors I review that haven't either, so I got over the self-pity. I have a very special reviewer who makes it all worthwhile, and that's all it takes. As for overdone pairings, I guess I haven't been reading fanfic for long enough to get jaded. I am actually not that big a fan of Bya/Ren myself. I just needed something to write about and they seemed the easiest. I also think that Kyoraku/Ukitake are too obvious. However, I've been trying out almost every posting, just in case I run across a gem. Personal preferences be damned, if I find an engaging writer, I want in! They usually have the ability to change my perception and make me like the unlikable. i.e.. I hated Szayel but one story made me love him (just in that story). And as you know, I didn't have Urahara in my radar until I read your stories. (and Silverkytten's) So it prompted me to read more with him.

I'm also a fan of the underdog, so even if I think the writing is good, but not great, I'll follow and review regularly just to support the author. I feel so sorry for stories with no reviews, unless they're "crap", then my sympathy is non-existent.

Ehh...my mom's menopause was bad.... It's seriously a wonder my brothers survived it. (Brats. Teenage brats. And the youngest brother, who's 9 years younger than the twins.) She bled about once every two weeks; really screwed my PMS up. My body synchronized with hers. Horrible.

I'm a lot better today, finally, after a month of "leaking" followed by 10 days of heavy bleeding, I'm finished. Never had that experience before and I was getting worried. I was feeilng exhausted and sometimes light-headed. It's a good thing I work in a lab, I just had a coworker take a vial of blood and checked my hemoglobin. No worries, though. I'm better than okay. I guess those hormones are fucking with me, seriously. I already have to deal with increased libido, which isn't that common, but it's kinda fun. (except I have no partner)

Edited November 18, 2012 by Raymy

[Cuzosu]

@Cuzosu

haha omg. yeah I think we all do that. The funny thing is when I am writing I like the idea of making my readers have that reaction , and then when I'm a reader I forget about that.

@Cuzosu

and that sucks about your step sister, but you are right it's not your problem, and there's nothing 'insensitive' about creating a boundary with someone who you can't trust

Yeah, I sometimes try for those cliffhanger endings to a chapter, but mostly I try not to because I run into cliffies so often as a reader - and they annoy me to no end when I've hit so many in a row.

I did what I had to do, and like I said, if she's infertile...I don't particularly care. She hasn't given me reason to, in fact she's done the opposite. But it's nice that you understand - certainly I've run into people who didn't, or thought I was a horrible person for not caring when she's "family." Yeah, sorry, I don't consider any of the steps on my dad's side to be family, since they either don't care about me or bad-talk me behind my back, or (in the case of my dad's wife) can't be bothered to be mature enough to even act civil. (Saw them at my sister's wedding; my dad was polite but his wife did the whole nose in the air thing and ignored us entirely. I was trying to introduce my bf to them, too. Not like it's a loss; my bf's impression of my dad's wife was, "OMG! Barbie!" as in - he's explained it this way himself - she's all facades and false faces. Only cares about appearances.)

I definitely agree. The people who review are very special because no matter how much the readers love your story, if they say nothing, you just never know if it's being enjoyed. They have a certain amount of power in that they can inspire you to write more, help with con crit, or simply just make you smile. I love the interaction between writer and reader. But if they take it too far, cross the line, and think that you would be nothing without them, well, I just hope the writer has a backbone of steel. I'm pretty sure Cuzosu wouldn't cave, , but I bet there are authors who would be devastated. You found that it made a big impact on your evening, even though you ultimately didn't let it get you down.

Need I say more?

I read someone's review in a story I was following and they said they were going to stop reading after something happened they didn't like. They had been with it through 40 plus chapters! I commented on their review, because I didn't think the author needed that kind of criticism. It wasn't constructive, just "I don't like the turn your story has taken so I'm outta here." I think they could've left without announcing it, but they clearly wanted to censure the author for being so rude as to ruin the story.

Yeah, I have to admit, that I was a little down that you never reviewed me. But, there's been lots of authors I review that haven't either, so I got over the self-pity. I have a very special reviewer who makes it all worthwhile, and that's all it takes. As for overdone pairings, I guess I haven't been reading fanfic for long enough to get jaded. I am actually not that big a fan of Bya/Ren myself. I just needed something to write about and they seemed the easiest. I also think that Kyoraku/Ukitake are too obvious. However, I've been trying out almost every posting, just in case I run across a gem. Personal preferences be damned, if I find an engaging writer, I want in! They usually have the ability to change my perception and make me like the unlikable. i.e.. I hated Szayel but one story made me love him (just in that story). And as you know, I didn't have Urahara in my radar until I read your stories. (and Silverkytten's) So it prompted me to read more with him.

I'm also a fan of the underdog, so even if I think the writing is good, but not great, I'll follow and review regularly just to support the author. I feel so sorry for stories with no reviews, unless they're "crap", then my sympathy is non-existent.

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I'm a lot better today, finally, after a month of "leaking" followed by 10 days of heavy bleeding, I'm finished. Never had that experience before and I was getting worried. I was feeilng exhausted and sometimes light-headed. It's a good thing I work in a lab, I just had a coworker take a vial of blood and checked my hemoglobin. No worries, though. I'm better than okay. I guess those hormones are fucking with me, seriously. I already have to deal with increased libido, which isn't that common, but it's kinda fun. (except I have no partner)

Mm, as long as I still had reviewers, I'd keep going. And some stories I'd continue even without any reviews at all. (Heartache, for example, because that one's near and dear to my heart, and I adore it just as much as my readers do.)

I've had similar events happen - a friend of mine, and someone I beta for, she had a reviewer give this long rant about how they were going to leave because she turned the story from a yaoi pairing to a threesome - and it'll be a foursome eventually. The reviewer claimed there hadn't been warnings, but another friend and I are big fans of the story in question, so we both immediately got in touch with her and said, "This is bull; you had warnings in your A/Ns throughout, the summary changed to take into account the other person in the threesome, etc. The reviewer was rude, their logic was flawed, and if they don't want to read it, they can just leave. No need to leave a flame that makes them sound stupid." And then we waxed poetic (or at least heaped praises on her) about the story.

I like to try different pairings - certainly I'm having a blast with them in my drabble collection! - but the thing is...the rare pairings that work well? They're way rare. I have problems finding almost any pairing that isn't Grimm/Ichi or Renji and Byakuya (in Bleach, at least). And I'm sorry - I just haven't been in the mood to even try Renji and Byakuya for a long while, so it's nothing against you. I'm just too jaded. Though you're not the only one who's a fan of the underdog. I follow some stories - and/or authors - that need tips or...well, I follow one story where I'm pretty much the only one who reviews, and the author is actually an artist and not much for spelling, grammar, etc., so there are errors galore there, but her plot is so good I can't stay away. Not that I want to. Besides, she's a neat person and deserves to have a follower who actually reviews. And since I love the story in question, why shouldn't it be me? If I find something outstanding about a story - plot, characters, whatever - I try to review and let them know.

Menopause...my mom had that leaking problem, too, for a while. I think about two months? And then she hit the full-blown bleeding every other week, and then when that finished (way, way later), she had spotting randomly, but it finally finished up. Was a miserable time, though.