Tcr

Chapter 8 is posted. As always, those who continue to read and enjoy, thank you all.

Chapter Two is posted. Hope you enjoy it

Come Hell or High Water: Chapter One: From CloverReef: Bloody fiddles of Nero, that was exciting! LOL sorry, I just had to say that. I see you loved that line. I’m glad to hear that, wasn’t so sure of it and had a bit a time trying to come up with something that wasn’t cursing (to fit with Kyla’s personality and characterization). Your combat sequence was well done. The pacing was good and, of course, you're very skilled at the chaotic violence of disasters. The deaths were so quick, I felt like if I blinked, I'd miss them, and I imagine that's what it was like for her too. There was almost a beauty to it. I’m sure while you were reading, your beta cap was on ;). I’m glad to see that the deaths were snap-snap-snap, as they were supposed to be and as I hoped they would be. I thought my own attempts at editing might have disrupted the rapid deaths, perhaps even slowed them down, so I’m quite happy knowing it didn’t :). We get a good look at the kinda person Kyla is here in chapter one. Her character really shines, especially in the listening to her intuition in the approach to battle, and the catastrophe that follows. Well done. Thank you. I’m glad you like it.

Author: tcr Title: Come Hell or High Water Summary: Upon returning to Earth, the loyal crew of the Relentless are betrayed by the government they served. But why? Left for dead, damaged, and hunted by their compatriots, Captain J. Kyla Cole and her crew are desperate. But how far are they willing to go? How much will they abandon? And what will they sacrifice for vengeance? Feedback: Always appreciated. Constructive criticism is definitely welcome Fandom: Original Science Fiction Warnings: F/F, Angst, MiCD, Violence Solo story or chaptered story: Chaptered URL: http://original.adult-fanfiction.org/story.php?no=600108509 Review Reply thread: A bit of a self challenge. I have not used my beta, CloverReef, and, instead, have gone through on my own. It’s a result of some writer’s block issues on my two others. However, I thank you all for reading it and appreciate any feedback you are willing to give. I look forward to hearing from all of you and any questions you may have, please, feel free to ask and I will answer them

Reviews for Come Hell or High Water Chapter One: From Tahn: I'm on the edge of my seat here. What happens next?? From KoKoa_B: Yes, yes; what happens next?! I usually don't enjoy true sci-fi like this but this chapter was really good. Lots of detail and I liked the explanations of the terms (which made me get comfortable with this story). This is good and I can't wait to read more. Glad to hear you both enjoyed the first chapter. I wasn’t sure if I had the right hook involved at the beginning with the slightly less action-y bits. I personally like a lot of detail in what I’m reading and, in turn, what I’m writing. It allows me to visualize it (like a movie in my mind), but sometimes I go overboard with it, too. Finding that balance was a little harder here, but that was part of the self challenge. I find that the Sci-Fi genre lends itself to explanation and exposition without much trouble. And, since everyone reads and writes Sci-Fi different, sometimes it helps keep the reader involved and (as you said, KoKoa) comfortable with the tale. Sometimes, I over indulge in explanation (...CR’s definitely slapped me upside the head a few times to cut stuff... lol). But, enough of my rambling. I’m glad you enjoyed Chapter I and hopefully I don’t disappoint with following chapters.

I want to read about the adventures of Mister Luflaraoisjd now.

Like BW, I have no Bob or Bobbie, but I do have a nicknamed Robbie... Doesn't count? Damn, I tried...

YAY! Although, I do have CR to thank A LOT for that, too. It was a lot of CR’s suggestion to come here as a step towards that end goal. . I guess it’s just more the daunting idea of trying to get everything set and ready and not knowing and all that singular jazz as well as the apprehension of utter, continual failure that’s stopping me more at this point… . No, can’t forget the good. Otherwise you do become a hermit in the middle of nowhere staring at the candle, speaking to it, caressing it, telling it you love it forever and ever. I mean… No, that wasn’t from personal experience...

Now, if only I could muster up the courage to even try to send mine in… . It’s kind of one reason why I joined, too. Figured if I could get myself posting here for others to see and review, assist in it, I could go back over the one I want to get published and set forth in doing that…

I had a severe apprehension of joining. You can ask CR, she'll tell you... Lol. It took a good year of suggestions before I considered and another before I went ahead. Even then it was a 'do it now or you're not going to!' Then six months to post on the archive... That first time, I must have deleted and backed out a dozen times... Second chapter, while not as much, still had the hesitation... Now it's a good half hour of staring at it, with worried looks, before hitting the post button… The forums are almost as bad for me... I often rethink and delete everything to rewrite essentially the same thing. (Weird, I know.) It's a struggle with the demons and half the time that bloody angel's sleeping!

I'm kind of strange in this regard. Some just come to me like that (...I guess snapping fingers is a little pointless to show...) while others have taken a while. When I can't just come up with one right off the bat, I often form up a list of random names. Everything I can think of potentially working with regards to the world I am creating. A three column sheet that has given, middle, and surnames. Then I take a look through. It depends a lot on the character as well as the story and consequent plans. Usually I have a bit of an idea of what personality and whereabouts their character arch is going, so this helps a bit. But... A fantasy world is not likely to have Bob for an Elf (okay, someone's throwing tomatoes...), although I would love to hear a tale about Bob the Elf... Depending on the character, too, does the name suit them? At least with me, it becomes a challenge to find a name that I feel fits a character. There a many times, too, that I'll take an existing name that may fit, but doesn't 'look' right for the character and twist it. (For example: Erica - Arika, Zachary -Zakari, Xavier - Zavier.) People are quite creative with names, so I wouldn't be afraid to experiment. And finally, at the end of development, the epic question (well... To me at least): Does it sound like something someone would have? In my case, as mine is not fantasy, I cannot speak much there,but I'm guessing there might be similar veins as naming conventions help make a race... But, I will leave that to other, more experienced, people. Anyway... What I mean is, I have found that most people I know, myself included, have names that roll off the tongue... Most do not have a name like Rhodel Adriana Benedict. Many have something like Thomas Christopher Anderman. It may not roll off the tongue well, but it's not as much a tongue twister as the first... (Okay, the audience is throwing the beer bottles; I'm off.)

I’m agreeing wholeheartedly with your entire post as I stare at my own self-indulgent worlds of creation. I don’t even try to convince myself otherwise, I just keep devouring the words. At least this isn’t a whole world of chocolate…

lol. That may work a little better… But I’m sure someone might…

I know that I always hesitate to leave a review, always worried about how someone is going to take that, and kind of worried that it’s going to be taken the wrong way. (That’s probably the introvert and questionable side of me rearing its darker side...)… But, definitely, just a simple statement like those brightens the day drastically. lol. A book report works quite well too.

First, as a writer and prospective published author (hopefully), the first and foremost reason why reviews matter, why any feedback matters, is a simple one. By receiving feedback from people, it allows a writer (hereafter, I will refer to myself) to improve my writing. Hearing what has been done good, well, best, or excellently allows me to go back through former chapters, whether posted or unposted, and note the points that were liked. Hearing what has been done badly, or that someone doesn’t like permits me to go through and note those parts and make changes through the prose and/or character development (if I feel the character development benefits from such changes). By extent, in doing that, it also allows me to advance through the writing for later chapters. For example, Pippychick, in a review, made a suggestion and point. I have consequently gone back through many of the chapters I have already done and reworked them through her suggestion. Some things work, some things not so much, but this is still advancement. For me, in an original fandom, this is doubly important. Creating a world, a new world, whether it be based in reality, or science fiction, or fantasy is hard and feedback allows the author know how well they have established that world. The feedback can help the author create that world more realistically and tangible to them. The author can, thus, work to create a better experience. Second, also as a writer, a review lifts spirits and feeds the artistic muse. I have known a few people, and myself, who have been down in the motivation and inspiration reserves. The will and want to write are drained, the ideas stop coming, and you feel like your attempts to create a world that can be enjoyed are all for nought. Then, from the blackness of endless self doubt, a review pops up. Even something as simple as ‘This is great’ or ‘I like this’ can be enough to improve the mood of someone who is in such a slump. I have seen it happen. Those words, simple enough, mean a world to an author. Even if someone does not like the tale, as long as there is a valid criticism, I do not mind hearing it. I do not know about anyone else on here, but, if someone does not like it, then an explanation of what you did not like. I cannot speak for anyone else, but constructive criticism helps. If the characters seem bland or the setting is not working or the plot seems too convoluted, a comment that says: “While I enjoyed the setting, the characters interactions seemed a little too stiff and robotic. If I may make a suggestion, I noticed that the conversation, for instance, seemed more so. (Offer a suggestion; perhaps it’s wording, perhaps its the prose and the tags behind it...)” Like I said, I cannot speak for everyone.... As always, an author has to take reviews and concrit with some grains of salt included... Some, apparently, with some truckloads. Thirdly, and this is a personal one for me. I cannot begin to doubt that there are not more people out there who are the same, but... It took a lot for me to come on here. You can ask my beta that and I’m sure CloverReef will tell you it took a MASSIVE amount of convincing to get me here. I don’t show my work off to people. My writing was a closely guarded secret. Despite what I’m sure some people have seen on here, I am extremely introverted in reality and the idea of doing anything, even making this post, is enough to set off all kinds of anxiety coursing through the veins. Indeed, it took a while before I even allowed her to read one of mine because I was terrified of the idea that someone else would read that. Receiving a review, while met with angst and apprehension, shows that there is an appreciation (not just for my own, but for others’ as well) for those who have written out and taken their time to entertain without pay. A lighthouse amidst a torrent sea; a ray of light in the darkness of night. This being said, receiving concrit is not the same as being a complete fucking asshole. I’m sure everyone here can think of something to say that does not include the words ‘This sucks’ or ‘Get a life’ or anything else that is merely intended to be insulting. I will never understand why people feel the need to troll and otherwise being a complete fucking asshole to people. IF you absolutely hate something to the point you have nothing to say, then please, don’t, people. Doing that only serves to discourage and otherwise hurt and, if my understanding is right, get you banned. Now that I’ve carried on like a stranger, weird, creepy....weirdo... Anyone else’s opinions, thoughts on the matter? Thoughts on how reviews have help improve your abilities? Why they’re important to you?

Chapter 7 is up for your perusal.

Author: tcr Title: “No Retreat! No Surrender!” Summary: Nadezhda Alexandrova finds herself embroiled in the opening volley of the Battle of Stalingrad. Feedback: Please, yes, certainly, definitely. Fandom: Original Pairing: N/A Warnings: MCD, MiCD, NoSex, Violence Solo story or chaptered story: Solo. URL: http://original.adult-fanfiction.org/story.php?no=600108497 Review Reply thread: http://www2.adult-fanfiction.org/forum/topic/64634-tcrs-review-response-thread/ This is an entry into the Dribs, Drabs and Doggy Tales Week 248 (Prompt Words: Fate, Finesse, Fun). This is also an internal challenge. Trying to write a short story is not easy for me. Constantly wanting to run this one into a longer written story was nagging me (...hard enough to keep it under 2000, I wasn’t letting the Muse run wild!). That being said.... Thank you for all who read and will read this. I hope you enjoy it and, if you did, please feel free to leave a review. Good or bad, love it or hate it, thoughts, concrit, I appreciate it all and it helps in the long run.

Pen Name: tcr Story link: http://original.adult-fanfiction.org/story.php?no=600108497 Review replies link: http://www2.adult-fanfiction.org/forum/topic/64634-tcrs-review-response-thread/ Type of fic: ShortStory Rating: Adult Fandom: Original Pairing: N/A Warnings: MCD, MiCD, NoSex, Violence

Chapter 6 is now up. Thanks to all of you who continue to read it and thank you to both Pippychick and Bronx, your reviews always make my day. Edit: So, some problems with font and size leading to Italicized words being Godzilla (Wordzilla?)… It’s been fixed...

I don’t mind advice. I won’t argue that advice, too. Less is more in a lot of scenarios, torture being one of those, and I did not plan on doing a lot of in depth descriptions for it. (I’m sure CR would agree with you there, too, as she’s been pretty good on pointing out where the ‘more’ is pointed in other aspects of the story and constantly reminds me of such a thing...). Thanks, Pippy.

Chapter IV/V: Glad to have you back, Pippy :). And, as always, thanks for the review. I kind of had a lack of inspiration today, so going to re-read the previous, I was thrilled to see a new one, although the Muse is cursing you over the whip cracks. Ok, so the lovers have all be split up and gone their seperate ways, but I don't think that's the end of it by any means. One of them is going to crack, but who? And what will they say about the others? I'd never spoil an ending, but……… You'll have to keep reading to find out, lol. I will say that I hope things don't disappoint. So the first one we see is Hanna, and I am dreading what she will see... I am actually hoping we will be whisked away to follow one of the other characters in the next chapter. I've read enough to know what went on in those places, especially things that were regarded as "entertainment"... It's a form of mass hysteria Very dark and gripping. While writing this, I've been plagued with the moral quandaries of how far can I go, how much can I show? Not because I think people can't handle it (I have the contro tag, so that should, hopefully, prepare people…), but more out of respect for survivors of this terrible time. But I won't ruin what comes up. Btw, I like the oblique references to the Treaty of Versailles and the harsh terms within it. Any student of the history of Hitler's rise to power and the causes of the second world war can't ignore what that did to Germany. Thanks. I struggled with the references, to be honest. I definitely wanted them, since, as you said, they are a direct reason for Hitler's rise and Germany's consequent role in the Second World War. Yet, first draft was too blatant and sounded a lot like a cartoon cut out. Second draft had less, but didn't hold enough conviction to me. This is the final one and I was a little worried I had made it unrealistic in its presentation. I'm glad to see that you didn't think so. Sociology and economic theory occupy opposite ends of the same spectrum. Where they meet, deep hypocrisies are revealed, and the extremes begin to be expressed in the psychology and politics of the masses and of nations. I really believe we are in that same position today, or we are pretty damn close to it. Of that, I can only agree. Let’s just hope history doesn’t come full circle.

Definitely will read it. Before I even saw your post, Pippy, I looked it up while on break at work. (I’m a bit of an old fashioned, kind of crazy person that buys the paper… Nothing beats the smell of a new book…)…

THOSE MANIACS! THOSE DAMN MANIACS! DAMN THEM! DAMN THOSE PLOT BUNNIES TO HELL! I mean, I’m okay… Hi, Anesor. Welcome to the discussion. When I started, I was kind of the opposite, I worked through the characters and their details more than the plot (I can hear the peanut gallery screaming and booing at me… Okay, who threw the rotten tomato?) For me, the characters made the story and making them realistic immersed myself in with them time and again. Understandably, as my writing grew, it became a more balanced style, plot and details equal to character. In short, develop at a pace that suits you. A piece of advice someone once told me years ago, keep everything you write. Look back on it, see how you’ve progressed, see what you’ve done, every little inch towards the goal is something to be proud of. And one that I’ll say, never stop looking at other works and reading them, seeking out advice and help, and practicing… As for the villains, everyone has to start somewhere. When I started, a lot of mine where the caricatures (Okay, enough with the boos, I get it… Okay, who’s throwing the chairs, now?) The advice I have is just to make them real. Make them have their hopes, dreams, fears, their motivations that makes them ‘evil’. Others probably have other suggestions and, like Desiderius has implied, a villain isn’t always a physical one; the faceless government or oppressive atmosphere can be just as much an antagonist as the bank robber waving a gun around during the robbery. Others have their own way to create theirs, but… My two cents worth on helping you to write a villain, now that I’ve been longwinded, as usual… I ask myself a few questions to try to get into their head: What caused Joe Blow from Idaho to become The Murderous Nightstalker? What drives them, motivates them? Are there any qualities that could be seen as redeemable (ie, do they help little old ladies across the street? Sauve like Indiana Jones? (Or, like Desiderious stated before, do they believe they’re right in what they’re doing? Do they see their actions as justice?) Hope this has some help within it…

I do have to admit, that sounds like an interesting read and definitely have to get it now. I'm glad that the characterization of Waeckerle has translated into words. I'll try not to disappoint. :).

Blood and Honour Chapters IV/V: Thanks for the review, BW, definitely lifted some spirits today. (And the Muse thanks you, too. Gave her a little time off the hamster wheel getting things cranking. <Speaking to Muse> Okay, break time’s over, get back to work!) From ANON - BronxWench on January 27, 2017 I read Chapters 4 and 5 together, and I honestly think it heightened the impact. The farewells were touching, and it was hard to see the couples parted, especially since they had to bid farewell via proxy. But that is only the first step for them, for now they need to pass under closer scrutiny than usual. Originally, much of Chapter IV was part of III, but I decided to break it and expand a little on it in the attempt to draw out a lot more emotional impact. I’m glad that it worked, definitely made my day to read that. I honestly felt that it needed to be shown and, while I’m sure some would disagree, I felt that it was better out at Berlin Anhalter Bahnhof, amidst the potential scrutiny and painfully observant prying eyes rather than within the safety of their apartment. Not only that, but I thought it showed a little more on how they reacted with each other out in public as opposed to their interactions in private. Mathilde seems to be able to make an easier transitiion, if only because her superior is complicit in her deception about her gender. He seems enough of a pragmatist himself, and woould rather have a gifted sniper in the ranks rather than behind a typwriter. I can’t deny that writing Kleinmetz has been interesting. He’s intended to be a composite of a few people within the ranks who were pragmatic and intelligent. I hope this comes across in the story and his character. While trying to tame myself from making the judgments from a detached, 80 years later viewpoint, he is the voice of reason (hence lines such as ‘We are a nation surrounded on all sides by our former enemies’), which, while not a blatant statement against the propaganda, is meant to be implied against the obvious slander that the National Socialists pushed. And, yes, he definitely prefers that one extra person against the massive hordes that would be banging on the gates of Germany sooner rather than later, especially combat oriented. Admittedly, Matilde’s transformation... I wanted to try to find a balance between difficulty and the story-telling without losing too much of either. It was this that largely affected the creation of the character of Kleinmetz, who became more willing to overlook her than the first writing attempt with regards to Matthias Schmidt. The original draft, I thought, dragged on a little too long with regards to it and took away from the chapter. So... some things were cut to make way for the pacing and the over all tale. Some people have probably complained about it, but oh well... But Hanna will be hard pressed to maintain her role, I think. Her instincts as a nurse, to nuture and care for people, will not serve her well in the hell in which she's currently living. She will need to learn to present a harder front. I have my suspicions about what she will see in the circle, only because I am well aware of the capacity mankind has for brutality. I would imagine beating a homosexual to death would be deemed a form of rehabilitation, hm? I admit, it’s kind of funny that you put up this review today. A lot of my recent post on the forums regarding the antagonists came, indirectly, from my attempt at writing Waeckerle, who was a real life figure. The last thing I wanted to create a caricature and have him spout off traditional Nazi anti-Semite propaganda and hate. So I did some research, finding very little, discussed things with CR about this, and proceeded to go back over this a thousand times and add in little details. I do hope that this makes him less a two dimensional figure and more someone who could have been your neighbour. She definitely will have to. I do expect you’ll enjoy the later chapters as they’re added and I can imagine what you believe she’ll have found in the circle. Indeed, I expect anyone versed even slightly in Interwar Germany has many suspicions as to what lies beyond the guards because, to paraphrase you, mankind has a high capacity for brutality. Especially if they’re told that it’s okay, that it’s right to do so. As for beating any of the so-called untermenschen to death being deemed a form of rehabilitation via the government and propaganda, there are no doubts to that. Human rights within Germany at this time took a massive leap backwards and off a long, steep cliff. Research to make this scene was...hard. The real Waeckerle was investigated for numerous deaths (marked as ‘killed while trying to escape’ or executed for ‘violent insubordination’/’incitement to disobedience’), some merely as an example for no other reason, while other Commandants were responsible for ‘accidentally’ letting it slip that Prisoner A was homosexual to the other prisoners, whereupon those prisoners would descend on that prisoner. This scene, which may not be entirely accurate, is an amalgamation of a lot of that research. A dark time indeed, now that I’ve rambled on... A dark world indeed, but your eloquent writing makes it well worth the journey into the abyss. Excellent chapters, and I will look forward to more! I’m glad you’re enjoying it and hope to continue to keep your fancy as it proceeds along. Thanks again for the review.