Tcr

Chapter 18 is up.

Author: tcr Title: Into the Shadows Summary: Lucretia Valerius has waited a long time for revenge against the one who turned her. Today, she'll have the chance. Feedback: Much appreciated. It helps to understand and improve. Fandom: Original Warnings: F/F, Implied Sex, Angst, Violence, MiCD, Complete Solo story or chaptered story: Oneshot So, this is a different take for me... Never done anything with vampire idea before, so... All concrit appreciated... And this was a request from good friend and Beta, CloverReef. Enjoy

So, in the recent weeks, while not negativity strictly speaking, I have been given some pretty harsh advice and a questionable PM elsewhere. This has led to a pretty downward spiral, admittedly. Yet, this has got me thinking… Everyone has dealt with harsh criticism from people. What advice would you give others, especially newcomers, in regards to this? How have you dealt with things like that in the past? In my case, I am glad to have such good supportive friends to turn to and I'm glad to have this circle of writers. Good friends who often slap me upside the head (metal baseball bats included); being able to talk to them is definitely a plus. Being able to come here helps, too. Many times, it's good, old fashioned mayhem; death, destruction, blowing things up, beating the bloody hell out of people... That helps, too. Hopefully this tread can help others...

Chapter thirteen’s up and running… As a further update, moved into Originals-Misc: Historical...

Obviously, in my opinion, all characters need their flaws. Without them, a character becomes two dimensional (the tomatoes can be thrown, I can use some ketchup ;)...). Without flaws, a character is just "perfect", so to speak. Or, if irredeemable, becomes simply too evil. Reality isn't as black and white. I'm probably rambling and not really answering things...

In the event people are wondering… I have removed Hell of an Anniversary in favour of Rebirth. While I liked HoaA, I made the ultimate decision to remove it for a multitude of reasons. Thank you, TCR

Chapter seventeen’s up. As a side note, added a new oneshot story for a character scene… Rebirth…… I’m hoping people are enjoying it so far...

100% agreement. And this has been brought up a few different ways here, too, so it's not just you. I find that the current generation (sorry...) is the worse for being easily offended and wanting to live in the bubble of "nothing bad ever happens"… "But, Officer, I assure you, I only robbed the bank and killed people and, you know, sodomized some with that pole...in the name of research! I'm writing a how-to, do-it-yourselfer book on striking it big and laying more people than you can believe!" Damn it, now where am going to sell all the kidnapped souls in my basement? (Okay, throw the tomatoes now, I'll see myself out.) On a serious note, definitely a good thing and idea. Understandable in the context of the time period and all, but... Children! Damn it, children! That's probably not the best message to be sending...

No, no... Murder is warping the minds of the innocent to become mass murders... Or do I have that wrong? Maybe I have it wrong...

Oh, certainly, on both counts. Deny or shooting down the idea of writing rape definitely downplays or dismisses the reality of it. As you've both said, it happens. Humanity is not perfect by any stretch of the imagination; it's ugly and disgusting and, at its worst, can be downright appalling. One only needs to look at the treatment of POWs in war, the homeless veterans, and, indeed, the treatment of everyone in between to see that. We are a hostile, disturbing race. If one cannot express that nature, in any form it takes, then what is the point of it all? Well, there goes my defense... Honestly, officer, the books told me it was okay! Purely pornographic depictions of rape, without offence intended, GG, to me, fall under a different category all the same. But no, even there, I wouldn't call it lazy or otherwise. One has to formulate and write it in a way that is just enough to draw the readers in, but not enough to turn them away. I haven't done purely porn, so I only have my experiences to fall back on here (feel free to throw tomatoes)... It's been hard for me, probably because I don't write it, to craft a convincing scene while keeping it just disturbing enough without overdoing it. (I think I had you read it, CR, as Beta...but I could be mistaken...)... And I'm still worried I'm pushing too far... (but that's what A/Ns are for, right? And tags...) "Oh, YEAH!" the Koolaid man cried, smashing through the wall. "Now suck on me straw!" And to end… Certainly, there's no laziness in it. While I would say advancing character or plot (or romance) is something it should do, having the gratuitous rape scene to remind the reader of the world, to shock them, or even remind them of the characters in this world, is just as valid. Am I rambling again?

Chapter 16 is posted.

So, a few months ago, while I was looking to write a realistic, yet also respectful, rape scene for one of the stories I’m working on, I did research (...as any normal person would have ‘rape’ in their search files... I swear, Officer, I’m not trying to find ways to not get caught... Okay, you don’t have to taze me-)... Anyway, while doing so, I came across a number (a fairly large portion of the search results, actually) on how rape in literature was merely a lazy man’s tool. Most of them stated that, using rape in literature was a sure sign that the writer in question was lazy and relying on the ‘shock’ value of the rape to keep people interested in the novel. (As a disclaimer, many of them seemed to use Game of Thrones as their example of why and how this is,,, I understand the reasoning behind this, but, seriously, if you’re just using GoT, I’m not sure how valid the argument can be made...) Obviously, rape is not something to condone or glorify, but that hardly disqualifies it as a ‘lazy writer’s tool’, in my opinion. There are many ways that rape can be used (excuse how this will come out) to great extent in advancing a character, characterization, or even the scenario without the gratuitous amounts of consistent and, my opinion, eventually boring scenes... Thus, my question is, what are your thoughts on rape in stories and, indeed, in what you read?

Chapter twelve is now up.

Wait! Hold the phone! Stop the presses! Abraham Lincoln didn't fight vampires and that wasn't the reason for the Civil War? Damn, I've been under the wrong impression! Guess I gotta cut the Vampires as leaders of Nazi Germany out now...

In my opinion (and I'm sure everyone has an opinion, so I wouldn't claim to be an expert), I would describe it in a generalized format, then center on one or two images that would describe this… For example (Use prohibited, example only, please): Pictures lined the wall, portraits that showed a kid at birthday parties, school portraits, and playing sports. Each picture presented a smug son-of-bitch, the smile that said "I'm better than you" and the look to play it entirely. One caught my eye. The little prick crying while surrounded by presents at a party. God I hated him; I wished I'd had a mountain of presents like him, I wished I'd had a family like he had, and he was crying! Another picture, this one caught at the moment he was throwing a sweater across the room, his face distorted in anger. Why would someone put that up there, as though they were proud of this display?

Well, you know what mine are, as my Beta, but… My area of specialty, so to speak, is science fiction or speculative fiction. I also don't mind writing historical, but a lot of the time, I find myself having to smudge a detail slightly... And I don't like doing that… I really avoid the romance... Like extremely... Like vampire and sunlight (and not the Twilight vampires...)... I don't really think I do good writing it... I actually think I fail when I've tried (I'm sure anyone keeping up on CHHW would agree...) Another I avoid, though not as vehemently, is westerns. I was never interested in them, so now I don't really have the interest in writing them. Why do I write SciFi and historical? I guess it's the love of stuff like Star Trek and Star Wars with my grandfather. Good memories instilling that deep love of the genre. When I started writing, sci fi was the first I wrote... And historical, I just love history.

Jean entered the manhole, the putrid smell assaulting his nose and he pulled his thick shirt over his mouth. It did little to settle his stomach from the smell, but it was still better than before. He did not want to imagine what it would be like later. (20 pages later, all describing the intricacies of the Paris sewer. Five on the architecture, five on the smells, five on the noises, five on the rats) In short, Jean found it to be hell right now. I've never been able to get into stories that put that much detail into their stories. Don't get me wrong, I love details, as Anon said, details help to create the world, and are a great way for the reader to infer certain elements without saying them. To use the example, the half used, blue eraser on the desk of a detective. It's a good way to imply many things about this detective. Further details would narrow it down further regarding things on his desk. Just, like DP said, don’t over do it. (...I'm guilty of it, so... My Come Hell or High Water, I had a long description of what was not necessary at the time description... Although I felt it was, later came to realize it wasn’t entirely and cut things...)

So, I had a thought lately... Scary thing, I know… I can smell the smoke billowing out... The use of the Chekov’s Gun element in fiction is a simple idea. For reference, if one shows something (ie. A gun), then you have to show it being fired before the end of the play/novel; if you don’t, well, there’s no point to having it presented. I can’t say I’ve seen a lot of its usage in modern works. Most works that I’ve seen seem to disregard this idea in favour of many other things. I’ll admit, I’m guilty of this as well. I’ll show a great many things and then completely disregard that. Show weapons, gear, et cetera, and never use them again. So, the question becomes, does anyone use it? Does anyone ensure that the weapon they’ve shown in Scene 1 of Chapter 1 is used by the end of the novel?

I keep trying

Two reviews this time... YAY! No Retreat! No Surrender! From Mastershakeme: That was sad, but I guess we were expecing an ending like that. I really liked the detail of the gun being kicked away and lost in the rush of soliders. It was FUCKING DEPRESSING! Like 'There goes all hopes and dreams!' Well fml, I quite enjoyed that. The image of the gun disappearing, as Yevgenyia was killed will stay with me... The names were definately hard to prononounce though and I gave them little nicknames so I wasn't constantly stumbling over them. Nice job! Nice example of one-shotting lol!!! I'm glad you enjoyed it. I tried to make it a depressing environment, since the war itself was, yet also the personal Hell they went through. The end, for those who know history, was expected, yet there's a certain ambiguity to its as well :). I tried to choose names that fit, but we're also easy to pronounce... Apparently not the best ;). Thanks. I'm not exactly an example to hold up, but I like to think that I do good. Blood and Honour: Also from Mastershakeme: First of all, I'm also interested in history and I'm fascinated by this time period in general. After having read the first chapter, I feel that your writing displays quite a bit of talent, and I'm intrigued and want to read more. There is room for improvement, but we all have a little room to grow I think your characters had some pretty relatable and negative emotions revolving around the rise of Hitler. Perhaps a little more detail could be added in relation to the argument. I want to feel a little more tension over this disagreement that will impact their future. I like the atmosphere of the Nazi environment; the doom and gloom is palatable. I love the inclusion of the radio broadcast. It draws you into the time period. It's great that you researched. I can tell! You mentioned stuff I didn't know about. Was there really some sort of LGBT in Germany in that time period? Before Hitler of course, the Sexualwissnschaft? I was interested in the interaction between the 4 characters and you did a good job weaving the character introductions, bits of description – like Fritz's blond stubble and Mattie's hair – and character – such as Hannah's gentle personality – into the story with dialogue and direct actions. Very good! That is a talent, the ability to show not tell. I wasn't bothered by there being 4 different main characters, but I did have a little bit of trouble remembering all their first and last names as well as their nickname. I didn't have any issues understanding what was going on though, so it's up to you whether you want to change it. The main stylist change I had in mind would be to possibly condense and simplify the conversions. But I have the feeling you may have been going for a "German 1930s" era type of lingo and the elaborate style of speech may have been how they talked. So, I'm probably the one who doesn't what I'm talking about ;-) I liked the little words in German here and there... I took German in school, I think its fun to try to try and pronounce them. It's super immersive for me! The kiss between Mattie and Hanna was passionate. I liked it more than their handholding (that action could be smoothed out a bit, it was a little bit wooden). But the kiss was an excellent scene because it expressed the desperation of their situation, the love they felt for each other, and the passion they felt for each other. Beautifully done. Thank you for posting! I will read some more when time permits. Peace! Well, now, this is a long one… Okay... <cracks fingers, neck, spine...> Someone call 911! First paragraph: Thanks, MSM. I know you started betaing in Chapter 10 and can see the changes, so this is probably a lot different... Lol. And yes, we all have room for improvement :). Second paragraph: Perhaps you're right regarding detail and necessitating more in there. I tried to make the atmosphere dark and foreboding... And the radio was the one way I thought best to start it off... I'd read that radios and newspapers were the thing back then, people even forced to buy radios later just to hear Hitler speak… Third paragraph: Actually, yes. In doing research, I was amazed to learn that Germany was one of the more progressive countries in terms of the LGBT community before Nazism. Indeed, the Instituet fuer Sexualwissenschaft was a pioneer in pushing that homosexuality was not an illness, but normal. It's a shame that the books and institute were destroyed… Fourth paragraph: I try not to do massive character description dumps as they tend to blend together when I read it, so I usually split them, drop descriptions in throughout. I'm glad it worked and I'm glad you liked the descriptions and interactions. Fifth paragraph: Perhaps you're right in the fact that the names may need to be cut back a little... Sixth paragraph: I do have a tendency to ramble on, so this might be something to talk about in depth. Seventh paragraph: I tried to make it a bit of a foil. Wasn't sure it worked, so thanks for pointing it out and reassuring the ego. Thank you for reading. I look forward to further pointers and I hope you keep enjoying :).

Chapter eleven is posted. I hope everyone’s enjoying it :).

Lol. Not just you, MSM. Mine, too. Mine, too. Mine are probably some of the tamest... (Should that be maybe with an L?...) that CR has read. And probably a few other people have read... But, that said, the question is always: Is this in character for them? Because if you have a set characterization and you change Sexy Time (...) to appease one person and it contradicts established story... Then,to me, that's not a good thing.

I don't have to wonder about people. I sit back, read mine, and go "I'm a little demented, aren't I?" I'm sure as Blood and Honour goes along, for example, and disturbing things come up, people are going to think I escaped a psych ward, but I'm okay with that... The cops at the door... Well, that's something else... Need to find more spaces to hide bodies! Lol.

I put one of mine on two others (AO3 and FictionPress, if anyone's interested in knowing...). One from a recommendation for a good amount of traffic and reviews (after all, reviews are great to help improve , but, also, it helps to get a wider audience...). Both sites are a bust in my case. Very few views and less reviews... While I might keep the written work up on one, the other, the one with good traffic, I'll probably delete, as that hasn't helped at all. Trying out other sites hasn't been bad though. They've shown what a great place this is. Not to mention how glad I am it was recommended to me. To be honest, my loyalty lies here. I post here first and I see views climbing. I'm quite happy with how that is, I'm happy with fellowship of writers, and with the admins. There's quite some restrictions on others (CR's example of AO3, to use it) or things are outright confusing, or the set up is... Mind blowing... And I mean explosive, nuclear detonation explosive... The admins here can be approached and talked to, active in the environment (Forums, archive), and are friendly. Perhaps others on other sites are, but on the ones I've seen, they haven’t been, which only cements my loyalty further. Okay, so, hopefully I'm not going to have chairs thrown at me... I know it was supposed to be about other sites... okay, that yam was uncalled for... At least throw an orange, I'd eat that.